People feeling under pressure to wear a poppy.

[schroeder]

Yesterday on the bbc news a very interesting conversation about the increasing pressure people feel to wear a poppy seemed about to start, but was cut short. It was something to do with football shirts I think.

I feel this is a conversation that should be had. I work with the public and feel uncomfortable every year when it is expected of me to wear one.

It's not the wearing so much that bothers me, but that in doing so I am supporting a charity I would not support otherwise.
Surely we should not all feel forced to give to this charity whether we like it or not?
I do not think even the British legion woud want poppies to be compulsary?

Have not read the whole thread, but I would never wear something I didn't like wearing because of social pressure

Except, perhaps, knickers on a hot day....

few people are forced to wear the poppy, but many are coerced

OriginalPoster, you are lucky that you don't have to conform.

*But we had to go, so we'd sit there every year and we'd watch the tears silently run down their elderly face as the heard the names of their brothers, fathers and friends read out. I have never forgotten it.

I wear my poppy with pride.*

in a nutshell!

I wear mine too Mindthegappp and if it falls off (which they often do without having a safety pin) I'll buy some more .

I'd rather my money went to help people who lay their lives down for us than have to give our taxes to the ones who sit on their backsides doing sweet fa all day.

I would rather buy something useful that supports my chosen cause, so instead of a poppy, a mug, bookmark, pen, bag or whatever. Then the money is raised without anyone having to put their political cards on the table iyswim.

It's very rude to tell people to shut up just because you are bored of hearing about it.

I wasn't telling other people to shut up-merely to stop worrying what others do. No one puts pressure on me to wear a poppy. I used to have one when I was teaching, but no one would have known, it was on my outside coat. I can't see why anyone feels pressure. Half the time I think I am wearing one and I have lost it and been wandering around with just the pin!

Anybody who thinks that those of Indian or Pakistani or other Commonwealth origin have no cause to remember or wear a poppy is a victim of poor History teaching. The Indian Army in WWII was the largest volunteer army in history. It had over 2.5 million men under arms and contributed enormously, as did all the other Imperial, now Commonwealth, Armed Forces to eventual victory. So anybody being racist about this should be told in no uncertain terms that they owe their freedom of speech to those volunteers as well as to their own grandparents or parents.

I wondered how long it would be before the benefits statement came up

So, all those who think its the symbol that's important, what of people who buy one poppy and wear it year after year? And do you feel the same way about honouring policemen and firemen who died in the line of duty? Should we not remember them also?

I wondered how long it would be before the benefits statement came up

So, all those who think its the symbol that's important, what of people who buy one poppy and wear it year after year? And do you feel the same way about honouring policemen and firemen who died in the line of duty? Should we not remember them also?

There are plenty of Indian names on the Menin Gate.

I did mention Blair because he increasingly ticks me off - having a moment but thankfully the little petal eyes of M'net cut me out. :o If I were to mention Churchill it would be for Gallipoli and not for WWII.

As I was saying, I don't look to see who is wearing a poppy, I do and I have my reasons for doing so. All this talk of "pressure" is eye-rolling ridiculous.

You would think its ridiculous, you wear one and don't come under any. It has been demonstrated on this thread how judgey some people are when they see someone without a poppy.

Do people really notice who isn't wearing a poppy?
I wear one and always have done but as I said above, it's about remembrance, I wasn't really aware where the money went when I was young.
My grandpa fought in the Somme when he was 17 years old. He got shot in the leg by a German, he looked into his eyes and could have been killed but the other soldier made the choice not to.
When I was a child (I'm 55 now) he was our main babysitter as my mum had four of us under five,. He never talked about the horrors of it, in fact he used to insist he had a wooden leg, and pick up a splinter of wood and show us. He never showed us his leg though, I don't know what age we were when we realised he was joking.
I have old sepia photos of him in his Black Watch kilt and one of him sitting up in his hospital bed.
He's long gone now but when I watch the Remembrance service and see the poppies falling down I always think of him.

What a lovely post LadyBeagle

My Grandpa was in the RAF at the very end of the First World War - too young and lucky to see much action.
But my Uncle was in the RAF in the second and I sometimes think of him flying over Germany and the bombs they must have dropped.

Hard to be a man (or a woman) in the last century. Let's hope and pray that it will be a little easier for our sons (and daughters) in the coming one.

Rhubarb, in case you are still reading (I've only just got back online). For me, 'spurious reasons' are of the 'I don't support the military', 'I am against war', 'because the RBL run subsidised pubs' type bollocks.

ie nothing to do with the real reasons behind the donating to the poppy appeal. I accept that some people will not want to wear them for their own reasons (like yourself) and would not judge them for doing so. I also support (and have actively encouraged) the wearing of red and white poppies together, which to me say "I remember the dead, but I wish for peace". I do judge someone that uses poppy wearing (or the lack of) as a political or anti-military statement.

To the poster that mentioned the Indian Army and their losses, thank you. I have stolen your quote and posted it before blocking a couple of dickheads on my FB using the Poppy for a racist slur

I would be horrified to think that wearing a poppy had become compulsory - it makes it less of a conscious decision, which is a shame. We have a choice to wear a poppy and because we have that choice we can think about what it means for us and whether we want to wear it or not. I never judge anyone who doesn't wear one but I wear one quite happily.

My husband is in the Army and is due to depart for Helmand in three week's time, leaving me and our three small children (aged five and under) behind. Last night we attended our local Festival of Remembrance and I was proud to be part of a long tradition of service and sacrifice. We thought of our friends who've been killed and maimed in recent conflicts as well as of relatives who died in past ones.

Remembrance, for me, should be a private as well as a public thing and there should be no judgement where people choose not to participate - especially if those people have thought carefully about why they don't want to participate.

I think the Armed forces deserve our respect - as do all the other professions that serve the country (police, NHS, fire service etc). There should be a recognition that serving in the Forces carries a certain risk and responsibility and there absolutely should be adequate care for those damaged by their service. Here's hoping the new Military Covenant holds fast.

This interested in commemorating those from outside UK who served might like to be aware of the West Indian Ex-Servicemen Association. Based in Clapham, it commemorates the thousands from there who fell, and assists veterans in need.

The British Legion is not really The Military, though is it?

The Military sends 'em off to war and The Legion picks 'em up afterwards when they're damaged.

I used to have to have contact with the Legion every year through work. Loathed the guy, and his attitude, but they were still doing really worthwhile work and taking a lot of pressure off other charities.

I dislike war in all it's forms but that is not going to stop it. Meanwhile, a lot of brave people are suffering because of it. So are a lot of foolish people, a lot of people who would otherwise be wastrels, etc etc.

What they are all doing is a seriously unpleasant and dangerous job so that we don't have to reintroduce conscription. And then YOU might be the one to benefit from The Legion.

I wear my poppy with pride, and in memory of a lost grandfather (WW1) and a lost uncle (WW2).

"The Military sends 'em off to war"

A small point, but an important one - the Government sends them off to war, not "The Military".

Yes, you're right. I was overcome by my lilting phrases reflecting the OPs nomenclature, and allowed accuracy to fly by the wayside.

And I too am proud to wear my poppy, in commemoration of all those who have died, in thanks for the loyalty of our forces, in gratitude to those who are doing something I am not prepared to do myself.

OP I think your attitude is somewhat, er, immature.

"I think there can be an element of xenophobia in the pressure to wear a poppy. Many people don't wear one because their ancestors were not British and so they may have no connection to war veterans or have family who were on the other side."

Hang on a minute, surely people who have chosen to settle here have just as much reason to show gratitude to those who fought for our freedom as everybody else? Many many people have come to live here to escape oppressive regimes and to give their children a life free from fear and tyranny. If Hitler had won then their lives would have been very different too.

So, all those who think its the symbol that's important, what of people who buy one poppy and wear it year after year? And do you feel the same way about honouring policemen and firemen who died in the line of duty? Should we not remember them also?

Would anyone like to answer this?

So, all those who think its the symbol that's important, what of people who buy one poppy and wear it year after year? And do you feel the same way about honouring policemen and firemen who died in the line of duty? Should we not remember them also?

Would anyone like to answer this?

LtEveDallas thank you and thank you also for not judging those who choose not to wear one as we have considered our decisions thoroughly and by not wearing a poppy it does not mean that we have not donated to that charity, merely that we have chosen not to wear the symbol.

It seems a shame that the poppy, like the Union Jack, is in danger of being hijacked by racist groups who have no idea about freedom of speech or democracy or equality for all. The soldiers who fought in the world wars were fighting against fascism and racism and discrimination, they were not fighting so that some pillocks could spout hateful crap against anyone who they think is different.

There are posters on this thread who have had relatives who have served in the world wars and yet choose not to wear the poppies and yet more who have relatives who have served in recent conflicts and will not wear one; there are many many reasons why people do not wear poppies, I hope that will be remembered too and posters reserve their judgements for those using the poppy as a symbol of their own hateful agendas.