Cleaner gave out my gate code and invited her husband in

[JuniperAndLamplight]

I'd really appreciate any advice re what to do re my cleaner who I've had for many years. I've been away for two weeks and gave her a key to our home and the gate code. I also gave her a schedule of hours required, and paid her in advance. Our home security system sends notifications of all activities, which revealed that she only worked 2hr shifts when I paid her for 3hrs, gave our security gate code to her her husband (not a very pleasant man who she is always about to divorce on account of account of his untrustworthy and troubled behaviour), and let him into our home for 12 minutes, when there was nobody home. I have no way of knowing what he was doing in that time, and it's been a great worry, as there was all sorts of sensitive paperwork lying around etc. I know she really needs the money (which ironically is why I made the arrangements, even though I didn't need her to clean in my absence), and she always does a great job, and is reliable in every other way, but I just don't know what to do? I am usually at home when she's here, so maybe I could keep her on, but not leave her home alone again..?

She probably does, as the cameras are not hidden, but she probably didn't realise that I get notifications of all the comings and goings. I'm not surprised your mother sacked them, that is seriously out of order. People have a right to keep their homes as a safe space.

I think you should have sent her the message.

She fucked up and massively took advantage of you when you were trying to do her a favour by giving her work. Now you have extra work to do checking your stuff, changing passwords, possibly canceling credit cards and locking down your credit, your finances and identity could have been compromised here and she bears responsibility here.

I'd be reporting to the police with footage. She's not a safe person to be allowed in your home, or others for that matter.

hang on, she was in your home working and he visited her whilst she was at your property? Or he let himself in on another day?

This is what i would do: give her a warning. Under no circumstances is her husband permitted inside . She had no right to pass on the code. Any other offence and she’s sacked

tell her you know she her arrival and departure times. She owes you time or money. Suggest she works an hour unpaid

give her a second chance and change the security code

Due to the scarity of reliable cleaners in your area, I would offer a second chance.
However, something needs to be said about both the lying about her hours and letting her husband in.
Explain that she will not be asked to work while you're not there again, so she won't be paid if you go away.

Also, change the gate code and tell her that you will always be in when she arrives so there's no need to have the gate code as you will let her in.

I would absolutely fire her. Never mind the husband, she shortchanged you on hours. Cannot be trusted.

She definitely can’t be trusted, giving your gate number would be bad enough but her husband being in your house for several minutes would be the deciding factor for me. Years ago we had a Gardner who came when we were both at home one day but both of our cars were off site so it looked like no one was in, he did less than one hour instead of the two I’d paid him for so I phoned him and he was flustered but came back to do the remaining hours and I then told him not to come back.

Really appreciate all the advice and sharing of similar experiences, thanks so much.

Shes broken your trust and if she was employed by a company, this would be instant dismissal.
She has deliberately undercut you by an hour each time and is a dishonest person. The fact that she did this when you were away and didnt think she would get caught is very calculated.
Great cleaner or not, do you really want so.eone like this in your home??

I would ask her for her version of events. See what she has to say about her husband being in your house. Why she thought that was acceptable.
And based on her answer I might be tempted to keep her on......... entirely supervised in future.
Or sack her. Probably the latter regardless of her response - but Id still ask as I would want to know why he was in my house.

On the fence about the husband, but maybe she intends to do all the hours you’ve paid her for, but is spreading them out a bit…

That is a possibility that I have kept an open mind a bit, I could even keep an open mind about her husband, but I'm really struggling with the breach of trust over the gate code.

Doubt that very much.she thought she could get away with it with no one being there.

I would either sack her or confront her with what you are aware of and ask her what her husband was doing trespassing in your home and why she gave him the code. This is very troubling. I would consider reporting to the police but they wouldnt do anything about it. I would also say she needs to make up the other hours she missed. I dont think I would want her back in my home. What if he was stealing bank details or some other sensitive info and selling them on? What if she aims to gather more info whilst in your home? Even if you are there she could be gathering info for some dubious means. I think I would get rid out of caution and after questioning her.

UPDATE: I had the conversation with her, and she turned on me and doubled down re giving her husband the security code and letting him into my home. She also not only tried denying she'd been leaving early, and went so far as trying to suggest I owed her for some extra time. So whilst it was very unpleasant, I was at least left in no doubt as to whether I made the right decision.

That’s awful behaviour by her.

I would also change my lock to be honest as well as the gate code. Clearly can’t be trusted .

Horrible behaviour.you definitely did the right thing thing.she could never be trusted again.

Now you know what she's really like you can move on and find another cleaner.
Do change your locks asap though as she may have made a copy and given it to her husband

Sack her. Change the gate code. But he might have cut the key for a spare? I mean it may be totally innocent but who knows? You need to ask her why he was in your home.
soz just seen update. So yeah now u know. Get rid of her
and don’t provide a reference. How dare she use ur
home as she chooses.

Wow what a cf.

i think it a breach of trust issue at the core of this. Thats usually insurmountable when your security/privacy in your home is concerned.
There could be plausible explanations for the husband coming round.
My cleaner just messaged me at work and said just tot let you know i forgot my medication today and husband popped round with it ,apologies,
The only working 2 hours rather than 3 is an issue(although i dont pay my cleaner by the hour i pay for the job because ive paid cleaners by the hr before who faff about for hrs and other who work hard for less time) because its a breach of trust too.
Bottom line is you dont trust this cleaner ,so probably best to end things unless a genuine heartfelt apology when you may consider a second chance.

So how did this go down.

Why did you give your husband access to our house?

What did she say?

You didn't do your hours.
Yes I did.
No we have cctv

How did she double down.
Change those locks. She is a liar.

Did you check your valuables and electronics and id documents and credit cards? Watch your bank accounts very closely. Change all security codes and locks and passwords.

I would lock down my credit if I were you, especially since she's denying he was there and consider reporting this to the police. He could have copied bank account or card numbers or passwords, made key impressions, taken photos, or left monitoring devices for later entry when no one's home or other purposes. Since she wouldn't admit he was there, I would think he was up to no good in your home.

Her and her husband might be in cahoots, someone I knew saw their cleaner left windows open so their partner could break in. Did she say why her husband was in your house. I'd change all codes, locks, passwords and inform your bank in case they hot hold of your account details.

If she denied her husband was given the code and going into the house I'd contact the police for advice

I'd ask her why her husband was there & explain that you now have to change the gate code as you don't want people you don't know having it. If you've not had any issues before now & are happy with her coming while you're home keep her on but explain that you'll be taking the hours she didn't work while you were away off her next wage. Don't leave her a key anytime you're away going forward.