Be honest! What things do you judge in other people’s houses?

[Teaandsleep]

Just a fun post.

Recently doing a huge renovation in our own home and am absolutely mortified at the dust everywhere, I keep having visions of visitors coming to the door and seeing all the dust everywhere, it is thick!

I also currently have a spatula sticking out my down pipe drain as we have just unblocked it and it’s to catch any old leaves/moss until it’s replaced 🤣

I do understand books as a collector's item. I've got some very valuable ones: Folio Society, first or limited edition, signed by the author etc. You can bet I take care of those ones and display them because they're beautiful and worth a lot of money. For many of them, I also have a cheap paperback version which is the one I actually read 😆

I also have well worn ones from second hand bookshops or just a long time ago. Love those too. I admit I don't like bending spines (it's not hard to get a makeshift bookmark if you need it!) and I don't read in the bath unless the book is very, very replaceable. Kindle never goes in there either. Just not worth the risk.

I don't think either you or your friend are wrong. But I think you're right that loving books is different to loving reading, and loving pretentious, self-aggrandising bloviation over it all is different to both.

Same here. Coffee table and reference books are well kept. Novels are used and held and read until they’re spent.
My cookbooks are pretty splattered.

Oh yes, the cookbooks are a mess.

I don’t mind a cracked spine etc but wouldn’t like to spill food in my books. I don’t think it’s difficult to read without covering the book in food or dirt and it keeps it in a good condition for if it goes to the charity shop. I don’t think a book looks ‘more loved’ for being covered in food and bent in half.

No, I would protect them all from food. Except the cookbooks. They're on their own.

Definitely dirty loos, handtowels that look like they've been out for weeks (or worse, no handtowel in a loo) sticky floors and bins with no lid. Oh and stuff soaking in the sink. Also questionable washing up. My inlaws live in a beautiful tidy house but when my FIL washes up he every single item in one bowl and does it in cold water. I'm not wasteful with washing up water myself but I at least want the water to be tepid. I have to sneak back and wash my kids' sippy cups or cutlery.

@Badbaddog

Milkshakes from MacDonalds for a dog????

Yep Strawberry or vanilla are his fave He’ll take chocolate or banana at a push All poured into his bowl which has never been washed in the 7 years she’s had him-his food bowl had maggots in it I love her to bits but I can’t go to her house

Oh dear. Could she be persuaded to give up the dog? It’s health is being badly neglected for m afraid.

District nursing stopped me being judgemental, when you’ve been in houses where you stick to the floor or carpets squelchy with urine then little fazes me now.
Squalor is sad, I often wonder why it was able to get so bad. Tackling it takes tact and time, general messiness doesn’t affect me.

Sticks and pebbly shit. A phrase I picked up from Mumsnet years ago. And inspirational messages.

Sugar tongs! Has anyone else mentioned them? I am the proud owner of a pair. They belonged to my aunt. I do not use them, waste of time, there is no sugar in my place due to diabetes!

I am not judgemental when it comes to dust as my house is full of it. However, I did find it rather revolting when I went to visit a friend's house at her invitation and there were puddles of dog and cat wee and shit all over the place, including the sofa. I think she should perhaps have cleared it up before we arrived.

How people choose to arrange their homes or how much they want to keep them clean is generally no concern or interest of mine as I don't live there and I am able to understand that everyone has different priorities and standards. However, one thing I do hugely judge is the fashion/compulsion where I live for buyers to rip out perfectly good kitchens/bathrooms etc and replace them as soon as they have completed their house purchase. It seems so incredibly wasteful and unecessary and I can virtually guarantee these same people will be filling these houses with eco-friendly products and will never see or understand the irony of that.

@TwigTheWonderKid

How people choose to arrange their homes or how much they want to keep them clean is generally no concern or interest of mine as I don't live there and I am able to understand that everyone has different priorities and standards. However, one thing I do hugely judge is the fashion/compulsion where I live for buyers to rip out perfectly good kitchens/bathrooms etc and replace them as soon as they have completed their house purchase. It seems so incredibly wasteful and unecessary and I can virtually guarantee these same people will be filling these houses with eco-friendly products and will never see or understand the irony of that.

@TwigTheWonderKid

We are intending to do exactly that I am afraid. 'Perfectly Good' is subjective. Does it mean aesthetically pleasing, to your taste, or merely functional? If it means the latter, then if that is the benchmark that suits you that is fine, but I suspect most people aspire to have their kitchens/bathrooms fit all three criteria. Which is why they change them.

I suspect that most/many of us who do try to be eco friendly have our own lines in the sand that we rationalise away - children, travel, home renovations, cars, etc, etc.

We all make choices and are all judged for them by others who choose differently. It doesn't make one form of judgement better than the next, it is still judgemental and does not have the higher ground because it is shrouded in often 'pseudo' eco-credentials!

Such is life!

@Chestofdraws

I also don’t understand the no books thing, ours are in a cupboard, and we use kindles, how would you know if someone had no books? They don’t need to be displayed?

Now that’s really weird!

@TwigTheWonderKid
I agree. It always annoys me when I watch those house buying programmes when people say they would have to rip out the kitchen and or the bathroom. Why? Also, why would people want to make everything open plan, especially the kitchen? Maybe I am being subjective here.

@CrunchTime22

Grubby hand towels. The fridge Cats on work surfaces till I got one. Now I get judged.

I know what you mean about cats. Can’t keep him off the table although he doesn’t go on work surfaces-at least when we’re there!

Astroturf and 'live laugh love' bollocks. I'm trying to buy a house at the moment and although I can look past the cheesy slogans which won't be staying, I'm wondering what's under the plastic carpet in the garden and how much hassle it will be to revert it back to earth.

I judge putting people’s health at risk. Outside of that, your home, your choice.

All our books are upstairs. Muppets.
If you like them upstairs, then go for it. I definitely wouldn't call you a muppet for having your books upstairs, especially if that's where you read them.

Minor things that bug me:

• Drinks bottles out on the kitchen worktop: squashes, fizzy drinks, especially things that should be in the fridge.
• cat litter trays in the kitchen
• plastic tat and writing all over the place
• silver sofas
• cigarette smoke (not minor!)
• recyclables in the non recycle bin

We went to look at a house the other day which was full of books. It was fascinating to see what they read as all my books are now hidden in my kindle.

Most interestingly the home office had floor to ceiling shelves full of hard backs. Based on the area and house style I assumed they'd be lofty tomes of some sort but were in fact crime novels like Lee Child.

I used to have lots of books but as my eyesight has got worse I now only read on my kindle so gradually got rid of the paperbacks. I do love looking at other people's book shelves though.

A home that is clinically tidy with no pictures on the walls, no books, no sign of being lived in.

And this thread is why people should never "drop in" on their friends. At least give people ten minutes warning to bleach the fuck out of the downstairs loo and open all the windows!

@Stirling2701

A home that is clinically tidy with no pictures on the walls, no books, no sign of being lived in.

I don't know about judging, but I feel uncomfortable in houses like this.

I have a house full of books, which is how I want it. I don't regard them as being on display. I like the ambience, like revisiting old favourites and have unconsciously sort of replicated the house I grew up in.
I kid myself that they are a bit like insulation, too 🙂

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