Help, tell me to start de-cluttering. I have black bags, I have a cloth skip

[NearlyAHoarder]

I can't face it. I've been watching videos about hoarders all morning and I need to tackle this. The floor all around my wardrobe is just covered up with boxes and bags and other things that won't fit in the wardrobe. I'm a single parent, work ft, I would like to have this tackled before I go back to work or it will hang over me for another year getting worse.

My kitchen is tidy. But for some reason my room is a mess. Part of the problem is that there's not enough space for my things. But then, some people would manage to fit a man and his stuff in to a room this big and have it be tidy??!!!!
It's such a big job. I don't dislike any of my clothes. I do have more than I need though. I feel a bit cross that my house is so small and I'm forced in to the position of having to throw out things that other people with a bigger house and bedroom could keep.
My friend told me to do 90 minutes everyday for 3 days, starting today, and then when I go in to tackle it on 3rd Jan, it'll be a less daunting task.
I'm sorry if it seems like this is a pointless thread. I just have tried all my usual methods of motivation and I'm still in bed thinking about it.
Right, I need to get dressed so that I can run in and out to the skip.

Sorry but I would skip the sociology books. Really. Books have to be worth their space. You're not going to read them for pleasure and they won't be the right books for a course, which in any case you would do by borrowing from a uni library.

One of the plastic boxes under my bed. I threw out a lot of pyjamas! That was easy.
I couldnt slide it back under the bed without a complicated manoeuvre to squash the contents down with my hand before sliding my hand out!

Ok, tackling books now but will do a konmari of coats on my bed laterm

We sorted the bedroom problem with a built in wardrobe.
Expensive, but wortht! We actually have space left and all!
Small bedroom, for the two of us.

@NearlyAHoarder

Yes, I can still fit more in it so in a day or two I'll ring them to come and pick it up. It's about 68 euro. Don't judge! I know it's landfill ......

I think you need to give yourself permission to throw things away. Selling, donating etc. Will just lead to procrastination. Recycle any clothes in clothing bins if you can but for other things just get rid for the sake of your mental health.

You can pledge in the future that you will sell/donate things in a more timely manner, but all the things that exist are heading to landfill eventually anyway.

Honestly, you are just prolonging the agony dou g a bit at a time. Your room was a mess but could have been finished within a few hours. You need a strong coffee and a mind to go in and blitz it fast. I have to clear out A LOT. 3 kids in a tiny house means we have no room for junk. Barley have room for the things we need, so I am great at being ruthless and that's what you need to do. You will feel so much better if you crack on and get an entire room done in a day than having it hang over you for days on end doing a bit at a time.
You also need to figure out little things you can do to make you want to keep it tidy and clutter free. I've added little things like extra lights, shelves with pictures, nice bedding to make the place look cozy and nice.

I was a hoarder I’ve been decluttering lately today I’ve done 2 hours and have 3 bin bags of stuff to get rid of
I did the same area a month ago and wasn’t sure about a lot of things so put them back telling myself it I haven’t used or worn them in a month they’ll go so this morning was actually quite easy as obviously I haven’t used them !

I'm feeling frustrated now. I said on the 31st December that I'd pay my daughter to take down and put away the Christmas tree. She said yes, so, deal done. But she won't DO it. She's lounging around. Argh, if she doesn't do it soon that's it, she's lost her opportunity to earn the money and I'll fling it all in the skip, decorations still on it. So annoyed. I cannot think straight in the sitting room with the tree still up.

Can you say to your dd it's now or never and if she doesn't want to do it now just take the tree down yourself?

OP you are doing great. Wish I could come and help as I’ve caught the decluttering bug!

FWIW I have recently moved to a big house and have spent the last month being ruthless in getting rid of stuff. A big house shouldn’t give me permission to hoard more crap. My clothes all fit beautifully in my wardrobe, I have SPARE cupboards and drawers and I can cleaning is quicker as I don’t have to move crap. I’ve even got rid of excess furniture! I feel so much lighter.

Consider creating a capsule wardrobe for the new year which will help you reduce your clothes/coats further. That has also simplified my life too (and makes it easier to shop).

More pics please!!

You're doing amazingly well, fair play to you deciding you needed to make a change and actually doing it! I just came across your thread and am cheering you on, looking around wondering what I can throw out it's so cathartic once you get going.

I cannot think straight in the sitting room with the tree still up.

Say to your DD "You have until 5pm to start taking the tree down, otherwise I'll be doing it myself and spending your £10/£20/whatever on wine. And I won't share." Then leave the room and use today's 90mins doing something else.

@Snog

Can you say to your dd it's now or never and if she doesn't want to do it now just take the tree down yourself?

I told her she had til 5 today. I wish I'd said 3. Because I'm not going to want to do it at 5.

She is a terrible procrastinator as well

From now on, when we arrange jobs, I have to stipulate a time that it has to be done by. And i'm going to have to be more dynamic. If she says 'no' then I must leap up and do it myself.

At the moment she's in control. If she says 'meh, no' the job is still there tomorrow.

This is not exploitation of a minor btw! She's 18 and always looking for money. She had generous amounts of money put in to her account over christmas by GPs and uncle and now she is putting her feet up

@TheCraicDealer yes, I like your thinking.
I need a glass of prosecco after all this is done.

@mintbiscuit, it's funny but the words ''capsule wardrobe'' have always given me the chills! Even when I was a teenager reading magazines!

Picture of my coats kon mari style on the bed coming up.
Actually going to do that next as I cannot get to the books in the sitting room right now. Tree in front of bookcases.

Following

Not sure it will allow a 4th photo today but Ill try.
My coats.

Not throwing out the black notth face parka, the black nf thermo ball or the rust jigsaw wool coat.

Throwing out pink hollister bomber, the wine duffle, the wine puffa, the bodon plaid rain mac. It squeaks when i walk.

I threw out 5 coats. That felt harder than any of the clothes ive thrown out. Even though the hollister bomber was too short, the duffle coat made me feel 95, the boden rain coat is too stiff, and the cheap wine coloured maroon puffer, it was 20e but even that was hard to let go of because it goes under the wine wool coat.

But i still have a black puffer that is very slim fitting to go under wool coats. If i ever go out!

I nearly put this bag of coats in the attic. Only this thread made me put them outside. I put one of those charity clothing collection stickers on the bag and put it on my gate post not in the skip.

Well done Nearly! Whoop!

I'm going to take the sociology books off the shelves downstairs and put them in the attic

No, you’re not!

You’re going to take them off the shelves and add them to a donation box. Honestly, just do it.

That 2x2 kallax next to your bed- why haven't you got at least three "drona" boxes (cheapest) or rush baskets (more expensive) in there? So much wasted space and it could look so much tidier! And put it up next to your bed so you actually use the top - that's a lot of space for a water bottle! Feeling tidy makes me stay tidy I find. Keep going! You're doing well!

i'd find a book bank, not give them to a charity shop, they won't sell will they?

You'r doing amazingly OP!

The coats you're keeping will still take a fair amount of hanging space. How about using the wardrobe for other clothes and the rail just for coats? That would cut down the visual impact of the hanging rail.

I also like slim velvet hangers for clothes but you probably don't want to be buying new things at the moment.

I don't think a bigger house would help tbh. Extra bedrooms might let you store more stuff but "managing" all the extra inventory is a waste of time and headspace. It'll never be enjoyable or feel good.

Listen to a podcast called A Slob Comes Clean while you declutter. That's a great one. I like her revelations about only keeping the amount of stuff you can handle.

Your coats are your nemesis
But you did it
Applied the logic of what was an ‘ extra ‘ or duplicate, what wasn’t quite right and did it !!
You got this

Watching with interest
I know I need to start also
You are inspiring !

Keep going

@MenaiMna

That 2x2 kallax next to your bed- why haven't you got at least three "drona" boxes (cheapest) or rush baskets (more expensive) in there? So much wasted space and it could look so much tidier! And put it up next to your bed so you actually use the top - that's a lot of space for a water bottle! Feeling tidy makes me stay tidy I find. Keep going! You're doing well!

Yes, actually, those small plastic boxes from ''Dealz'' were about 2 euro each but it is on my to do list to get bigger boxes specially for the kallax. My brother gave me that kallax after he de-cluttered his apartment! It is useful though.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by the state of the rest of the house now.
My daughter told me to take a break. I have been snapping at my teenagers all morning. They both drink so much coffee. It drives me crazy. They both have expensive coffee habits strolling around in their expensive dressing gowns. Their sloth is winding me up now but if I were just watching youtube videos like I usually do, their sloth wouldn't be annoying me. I will take a break. I've been going ''at it'' since about 10.30 this morning. I put saucepans and baking trays and a few other things in the skip too. I did one cupboard basically and there are about 8 more!

I don't know what to do next. I am going to calm down now and think.

I boxed up the sociology books and tried to put them in the attic but I have a pull down stairs and the box is too heavy to carry while you climb the ladder.

So ....... still have those in a box beside me.