Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Housekeeping

Find cleaning advice from other Mumsnetters on our Housekeeping forum.

Fledglings Flying Frightfully into October

973 replies

EerilyDeleted · 30/09/2020 21:23

A huge thanks to Mogthesleepycat for steering us successfully through September FlowersFlowersFlowers

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own, unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chatter along the way.

The FlyLady link is here Flylady. Don't be put off by the twee language of the site – we all agree that the underlying system is very effective.

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework - which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead.

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around again next month.

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with marketing nonsense. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

  • start or repeat baby steps
  • repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
  • reinforce baby steps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.
  • And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

  • No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
  • You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
  • It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the baby steps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders.

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings Launchpad.

Don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t. Some of us have been on here for years – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers very, very welcome.

SingToTheSky put together a glossary of the many weird and might-seem-a-bit-cliquey terms. We have been going a long time but we always love newbies - hopefully this list will help you settle in.

KCC - the Keep Calm Corner, invented by our lovely Fledgling SC back in March, where the OP posts nice diverting links, memes, questions etc to distract us from the pandemic.

Ta Da - instead of a to do list (which is of course welcome too) we often post our achievements, with accompanying jazz hands, in order to celebrate the positives, however small they seem! Sometimes if we want to share an embarrassed giggle/commiserations we also post a ta didn’t - the stuff we didn’t get done!

BRC - Bag/Box of Random Crap. These are usually formed when we are panic tidying and shove anything in “to sort later” which is also known as a stash and dash .

Power of Three or PO3 - the idea that if you’re feeling really unmotivated/overwhelmed by your to do list, you just choose three things to do, and then post when you’ve done them.

DLMS - didn’t lose my shit - in other words, somehow stayed relatively calm despite a stressful day!

SS/S&S - Swish and Swipe - this is one of the key parts of the morning routine, a quick once over of the bathroom.

Home Bleugh - Flylady's Home Blessing routine

And a few basics:
LOL - load of laundry
WM - washing machine
TD - tumble dryer
DW - dishwasher
HSL - hallway, stairs, landing

And finally "The Naughty Corner" - this is for Fledglings who perhaps didn't get done what they had planned for the day but are in need of a comfy seat, pile of cushions, tasty snacks, stiff drink and friends to chat to.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
40
HillsBesideTheSea · 21/10/2020 08:23

Thank you for you thoughts. I am now officially carer. A fact that he has finally accepted he needs. It is going to be a tough death for all involved. A degenerative condition with no treatment or cure and i know that this is going to affect my memories of him for a long while after to have to watch him suffer like that. It is hard when you have to parent the parents. For now he will be encouraged to do everything he can whilst he can. Covid has stopped resbite breaks and for me that stepping away for a weekend from the situation has been the hardest thing about covid. I have been trapped in a house with extroverts which is a big problem when you are an introvert. I am grateful that I have a few friends in RL to talk me through things even if it is at 2am, even if it is to call me an idiot because i have been looking after everyone else that i have just discovered i have forgotten to look after myself.

ED I went to ikea the other week. The carpark was as full as Christmas, but it didn't feel like that inside although it wasn't as pleasent an experience as it normally is because you were on edge and mindful of the space. All short cuts were closed to comply with social distancing and flow of people monitoring purposes. And the queuing system they had implemented flowed so well that I wish that they would keep it and use it when they have bank holidays, sale and christmas sales. They didn't have a lot of stuff, probably because everyone else thought they would get that project done whilst they had imposed free time.

Forgive me, I am tired and just discovered that ds who needs to leave for school in 10mins is still asleep. I also need to head to work. I can't work from home, so goodness knows how long i am going to stay employed.

EerilyDeleted · 21/10/2020 08:45

Oh, Hills that sounds very hard. I know you need your space and I think this has been a massive impact of Covid for many. And awful to have to see such changes in your DF.

Re Ikea - we have been putting it off till all the students going back to uni have finished stocking their flats. Haven't been for about a year. No shortcuts could be quite annoying, D tends to want to march through then I miss things and want to go back. We'll see.

OP posts:
HillsBesideTheSea · 21/10/2020 08:56

They were keeping a strict one way system no going back too. No up escalators in store down only. i could still skip a level but it was not the same experience your mileage might different as you are in a different locality and they might be a different layout/implementation of the rules.

One thing that we can be grateful for is that Dad is not worse due to the covid this would be how it was without covid. So many people who are suffering because of their care being affected by this bastarding virus.

May you all have good days.

EerilyDeleted · 21/10/2020 09:05

Well, at least I won't come back with too many random cheese-graters, tealights etc. I get confused in normal times in this branch (it's fairly new and I've only been 3 or 4 times).

OP posts:
merryhouse · 21/10/2020 09:15

Bower Michael Head's Road to Bethlehem is lovely too - it's available as SATB or as single voice. You may be right about the Catholic thing, though the rest of the choir (several of whom were brought up non-con, definitely no RC) all seemed to know of it. We didn't do Bizet's Shepherd's Farewell either - I would say maybe it's a French thing except that I can think of several French ones we did do!

Tori Amos did a Christmas CD - Midwinter Graces. Probably not useful for this but good to listen to.

Sing - the Mike Oldfield IDJ is the one that gets played everywhere. No words and far too fast Grin.

Hills - degeneratives are the pits. Flowers

foxessocks · 21/10/2020 09:53

So sorry hills Sad

IWillWearTallGhostlyWellies · 21/10/2020 10:14

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for personal reasons.

Stilllivinginazoo · 21/10/2020 10:24

Mission- I don't own a closet/wardrobe

I'm just procrastinating fullstop today as for reasons unknown last percentage of my joints are both stiff/tight and giving me weird electric shocks.im exhausted too so getting no where fast and PMS is making me irritable with it...
Dd2 antsy as English assessment part 2today(wrote one paragraph and froze with panic part one,wrote one sentence in history and froze with panic,sociology went ok)
Lil zoo going back in today at 11.so of course refusing eat/drink til after school
DS grumbling about school work and not happy has two online lessons today which will inevitably but a chaotic disruptive experience

Hills my dad has dementia.we had been estranged many years and my sister.her friends held her up and were amazing and whilst initially after he died she was very low with it all I know she's now glad she was there for him.chance ment I was with her at the hospital when he died which was peaceful and she said after how relieved she was it was over for him and her.degenerative illness is exceptionally cruel.if there's anything we/I can do please sayFlowers

Stilllivinginazoo · 21/10/2020 10:26

Boards games?I love Scrabble but lack anyone to play with.zoolets love playing games once they start,it's getting them off phones/devices to play that's tricky bit...

foxessocks · 21/10/2020 10:32

wellies sounds like a good plan for such a wet horrible day!
Got soaked on the school run, also very warm so that horrible soggy but also too hot feeling.

Ta das
School run / nursery run
HIIT workout - 20 minutes today so feeling quite proud!
Shower
Hoovered downstairs including mat by the back door which was covered in bits of twig etc
Took clean washing upstairs
Put some washing on which I still need to hang up
Tidied living room
Tidied kitchen
Loaded dishwasher
Ordered hand soap and washing up liquid refills

Made a coffee and will read for a little while before the building guy gets here to talk about steel beams, something which I'm not an expert in and yet somehow I'm the one here and dh who has an actual ENGINEERING degree is not Hmm (in his defence he isn't allowed to book any leave in October because of workloads and apparently the guy can only come week days...)

Wish me luck

Also for the record my anti procrastination today is MAKE SOUP because I roasted the squash two days ago and it's still in the fridge and hasn't miraculously turned itself into soup yet 😂

foxessocks · 21/10/2020 10:32

X post zoo

SingToTheSky · 21/10/2020 10:54

Oh hills I am sorry, what a cruel situation for all of you :( I am glad he has accepted he needs the help, but it’s horrible it has come to that of course. Forgetting oneself as a carer is such an issue and yes must be so much worse without respite breaks. These restrictions have hurt so many 😖 hugs xx

I am up and thus far managing the day, was grateful to sleep in until DH was about to leave at 9. Need to edit the plan as yesterday’s had to change when I needed to do my assignment edits, so it’s all a bit confusing! And we have DS’ friend round later so I need to figure out what we are doing. The good thing about DH working is they can now stay a bit longer as we will total 6 not 7 when DD1 gets home.

We were also meant to be doing the rock cycle with chocolate but the light isn’t working in the kitchen and it’s so dark in there. Thankfully it’s oven pizza for the Caglets’ dinner. Never had to change one of these strip lights before, Wilko would have it I’m assuming?!

EerilyDeleted · 21/10/2020 11:25

Is it one of the old-fashioned fluorescent tubes Sing? Most likely it's the starter that's gone not the bulb itself, look for a little round thing sticking out slightly from one of the end fittings, you push and twist it out like a bayonet light bulb, buy one of the same wattage (it says on it) and replace.

OP posts:
foxessocks · 21/10/2020 11:53

The engineer has arrived and as I was just starting the soup...I put way too much chilli in and the whole house stinks, the guy keeps coughing and said "I'm so sorry I haven't got a cough it's the spicy smell"...Blush whoops!!! I've flung the back door open now.

I'm also slightly concerned the soup will be inedible Grin

Stilllivinginazoo · 21/10/2020 13:28

Stick coconut milk in it/yogurt on top foxes

foxessocks · 21/10/2020 13:54

Thanks zoo I didn't think of coconut milk damn, that probably would have been better, I had some single cream so have chucked that in plus more stock but it's still very, very spicy!

I'm going to see what dh thinks when he gets home, he likes spicier food than I do...

Can't believe after all the soup procrastination I've messed it up 🤦‍♀️

Ta das
Made soup 🤦‍♀️ or tried to!
Worked for a little while
Emptied all the bins
Cleared out bottom of wardrobe and bags / coats hanging up, got rid of a pair of shoes,a hand bag and a scarf all of which I haven't worn for a very long time and didn't "spark joy" I was channeling my inner Marie kondo Grin
Hung washing up
Finished my book 📚
Ordered eggs from the milkman and paid for them
Cleaned up after soup making
Phoned dh to explain what engineer said (which wasn't much really! But plans should be over in a few weeks and then we can start!)

SingToTheSky · 21/10/2020 14:29

Apologies to anyone who already saw my FB post 😳 but I am feeling a bit more cheerful now. A few weeks ago I entered a little art competition about life in lockdown with a local autism charity. I got first place in the adult category. It was only small but I know there were at least two others so yay I didn’t just win by default 🤣

Pic attached! 😅

Fledglings Flying Frightfully into October
foxessocks · 21/10/2020 14:40

Well done sing that is so amazing!!

IWillWearTallGhostlyWellies · 21/10/2020 15:15

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for personal reasons.

apumpkinaday · 21/10/2020 17:26

Hi all! 3rd day down, 2 more to go and then a well deserved half term awaits me!. Although we can’t do anything as we’re isolated but I have lots of outdoor and in the house things planned!. We have been to the woods, the rain has been non-stop all day although only a light drizzle but we got our wellies on!. When we have muddy walks I bring a carrier bag with me and then put the wellies on them when we get back so it causes no mess! It’s life changing. I’m also starting to fall in love with my home again now that I’m trapped in it!.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this hills lots of love to you and your family❤️

mc won’t be long now!! I hope you’re enjoying your final weeks of sleep.

Lovely nails hazel!

Well done sing that’s brilliant!!

Fledglings Flying Frightfully into October
Lisette1940 · 21/10/2020 19:01

Well done sing - I can't draw for toffee!
Mad busy at work today and still finishing off stuff. Doing my to do list now: quick tidy and ironing pile. Child off to soccer practice and husband will return with real coffee for tomorrow morning.

HauntingHazel · 21/10/2020 19:40

I love it sing it looks professional!
Thank you everyone for the compliments on my nails. ED I did use a nail art tool for the ombre look, one end has a sponge. It was my first time using that and it worked well. I could see a makeup sponge actually working better.
hills do remember to take care of yourself as well as everyone else, carve out some alone time, even if it's just an hour.

Bowerbird5 · 21/10/2020 19:47

Hills so sorry to hear about your dad. I lost mine when I was 28. He had cancer and died at 57. My DSis is 56 same age dad was when he found out. She has had her 3rd chemo. It isn’t going well she has been in hospital again for at least 5 days. Having to drain her lungs.
I once knew a surgeon that had a degenerative disease. He had lost a leg as a young man, later married, been a top orthopaedic surgeon and had three daughters. They were in their teens and his wife who had been a nurse looked after him. She was so thrilled I had called in while I was on holiday. She looked exhausted but I think it gave her a buzz that I came to see them. They were neighbours of my granny. It was so sad to see him like that. It is so hard but we had bright moments with dad that us girls laugh about now when we get together.

Merry&Wellies Lovely carols I am going to make a list of the ones I don’t know then listen to them tomorrow as DH is taking the car to the garage tomorrow. Adeste Fideles- we always sing that at church, quite something when 300+ sing it.

Sing congratulations that is brilliant. I do like it.
Foxes can you nip out and buy a carton of squash or sweet potato soup and add it in?

We are having cottage pie I forgot to take the mince out so eating late. I made veggie pasta with some of my tomatoes and DH actually commented about how good it was. Usually he likes to add a jar. Now he realises I can actually cook. Only taken him 44 years!
BF and I were discussing DHs and how they come in to interfere and helpful comments like “Are you managing?” “ Shall I just put some of this in?”

I got two out of three antiprocrastinations done. Need to do the other one tonight.

Ta Das
Sorted bed
Washed pillow
2x LOL
Wrote and sent some emails. At least I no longer have to send any to school.
Cleaned kitchen worksurfaces and where DH splattered dirty potato water from peeling the potatoes. Don’t know how he managed it but I had to wipe down three drawers and two doors!

Fed chickens and gave them clean water. One seems to be walking a bit strangely but I can’t see anything on her foot. I brought them in one by one the other night. I hope she has just sprained it jumping down from the coop. They have a plank to walk down but sometimes they jump.

Stilllivinginazoo · 21/10/2020 20:26

sing congratulations!

SingToTheSky · 21/10/2020 20:46

Thank you all 🥰 it’s been a much needed confidence boost I must say. I was chuffed enough that I even entered instead of procrastinating and being too scared!

Also had the good news that my coursework has been signed off as my additions yesterday were good, so yay! Definitely a good day. Am now sitting in a daze since getting back from Asda - DD1 asked to take a walk so I got a few bits... somehow spent £50 WTF 😳🙈 I should not be allowed in shops! Granted about 40% was (needed) clothes for the toddler. 🙄

Pleased I managed the walk back up the hill but really should put my dinner in the microwave 😖 also the younger two are being unspeakably irritating. Whyyyy. 🤣