May our houses be uncluttered ...the Fledgling Fly thread.

[Shadycorner]

Welcome to the thread where we (loosely) follow the Flylady housekeeping system here to combat CHAOS (can't have anyone over syndrome) with a load of wine, chat and mutual support along the way. Quite a few of us have been on here for a while, so for that reason, we may seem cliquey, but we really aren't, and all newcomers, lurkers, returnees, regulars, and intermittent regulars are very welcome!

Every day I will post a link to the activities for "Today" which summarises everything you need on a daily basis if you want to follow the system strictly, but we tend to adapt it to suit our individual circumstances, homes and energy-levels!

Please note that, athough Flylady is keen for us to check in to the website, we've recently had a few concerns wrt security, so although there is lots of useful info on the site, it's best not download it or put any of your personal details into the website for now.

More information on getting started available:
here (containing baby-steps!) but please don't hesitate to ask if you have any further qs.

There are 4 levels for Flying:
-Baby steps - good for starting a routine and overcoming the perfection crippling effect
-Baby steps and missions - basic routine + more in depth tasks
-Baby steps, missions, and deep cleaning (if you are at that stage).
You can't clean clutter so don't consider this one if you need the next level.
-Flying combined with a decluttering system (kondo/unfuck etc etc) let's be honest fly lady is good for routine but not so quick with the decluttering results sometimes.

There is NO wrong or right way of doing this, it is about adapting the system to suit your life circumstances, which will be different from someone else's, and don't be put off by the barftastically twee nature of the Flylady site, the underlying system is sound. Feel free to ignore any step or routine that doesn't suit you or your home! No perfectionism allowed!

And when it all gets too much: come and take a seat by the fire in our specially adapted "naughty" corner where you can enjoy virtual and and lots of support from fellow fledglings.

More info follows ( but again, please note we advise only looking at the pdfs and not downloading them ):

** launch pad (general info) here

** daily babysteps pdf (ignore the ones that don't suit you or your home) here

** week day missions (some fledglings find it easier to do them at weekends) here

** info about zones (explanation of how zones work) here

** weekly zones (a rough weekly guide to which area of the house we are tackling currently, again adapt to suit yourself) here

** daily focus (helpful guide to allocate a certain day for a certain task) here

** deep cleaning lists pdf (only attempt when you have decluttered as you can't clean clutter!) here

Good luck and happy Flying one and all!

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Also, a huge thank you to Toostressy for running such a lovely April thread

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CAG i'm so very sorry to hear this. I used to help students apply for the DSA for Uni and it would drive me barmy if one of my recommendations was queried. I'd be interacting with the student and getting to know their needs and some person who's never met the student would say no to something. I know you are at your wit's end but regroup and appeal when you have the energy. Is there a disability advocacy group who could help you with this? In Ireland people approach their MP if something like this is turned down - don't know if that's the route here.

It's the attitude in the response 'blah blah caglet applicant doesn't need help' that is so soul-destroying.

Just discovered scoutcat has a bastarding tick on sight he got mauled by pyscho cat last week.bloody marvellous...
Now money allocated for big food shop divided up for vet trip as I'm not confident I could do myself and potentially make him I'll I don't get it all
One day I will be in credit for more than two minutes....

Ok smart arse why turn site to sight? This phone has got major issues

Oh no the idea of ticks scares me :(

Thank you all 💐

There’s a procedure for appeals and stuff, it’s pretty common to have to apparently, but it’s just the thought of having to go through all that (when we are already fighting enough with CAMHS to get him seen) is devastating and scary.

The play date was lovely though. One mum who is one of my best friends, and another I don’t know very well but can see us becoming very good friends :) DD stayed home with DH so it was just the boys, it’s nice for DS to have his own friends as normally it feels like he’s just tagging along.

Best get ready for aqua. Really nervous :(

Zoo get a tick remover from a pet shop then its really quite easy, I got one off bitey-cat's lower jaw without too much bother recently.

Cag - that really sucks. There are charities that can help, I used the Cerebra guide to DLA, CAB also might help, what a slap in the face.

Thank you, I actually used the cerebra guide and put so much detail in :( luckily I photographed the whole form before sending it, there is a local guy who helps with this sort of thing so one of my many jobs is to email him tomorrow.

Aqua was actually great, I didn’t quite manage it all easily this time but I’d spoken to the teacher beforehand.

And my friend behaved herself :o

Glad you made effort to go cag and both friend behaved herself and you enjoyed it

More rounds arguements about revision with dd2
Lil zoo in strop mode
DS stressed and pacing/clutch chest to feel palpitations more than usual
I am contemplating moving into the shed,but the spiders are huge and angry looking.there are slugs.its draughty.there is no electric of w.c/running water.i am old and not up for roughing it so guess I just got secure tin hat and hide in proverbial trench

🌼 launch pad link containing flight plan for Thurs best to just read it rather than download!

Cag oh no, that is so crap about DLA letter. Glad aqua went ok.

Zoo I second Expletive's advice about a tick remover. Tis the season! Much cheaper & easier than vet! Magnifying glass helps too!

Got back late tonight (still light here at 9 pm this evening whoo hoo!) after afternoon beautifying dhorse. It was so lovely there I was very tempted to stay over but dd has PE exam in morning which she is nervous about (25 minutes army assault course, if they stop they fail) so thought I'd better come back.

I would not pass that PE exam I'd probably still be at school repeating the year.

Managed to do evening routine and daily focus. Home bleurgh not done this week. Will do cloakroom and zone cleaning today. Husband will do errand day tasks. Getting back to what counts as normal at chez Lisette.

Well DD was hardly a barrel of laughs this morning and I'm not sure my presence was much noticed or appreciated - but hey - I was here and I made her a healthy breakfast & lunch. To be fair, I would be a grump if I had to do an assault course this morning. Bit worried about her tbh as she's still very pale/ recovering from flu.

I wouldn't pass it either Lisette! I'm utterly useless at that sort of thing! Need a winch nowadays to mount a horse!

The school uses the premises of a military academy in which to do sport so the obstacles aren't small, but they don't do the full course. Nonetheless its fairly testing . (DH swims there occasionally and has seen it! ). I'm afraid there is every chance of DD repeating the year as progression on to the next school year is not automatic here and depends on the results of really stiff annual end-of-year exams. Only 50% of students go through (usually 60% in dd's immersion class). The other 50 or 40 % who fail either change schools or "re-double" the year. It's utterly brutal. And DD hasn't had the best of years. We'll see ... . Lots of her friends have "re-doubled" at one time or another so it wouldn't be the end of the world. But I'd be worried DD would get very bored/disengaged having to sit through the same lessons again for an entire academic year. And she has two very close friends in her current class from whom she would hate to be split - and vice versa - it's not a nice prospect.

Loads of laundry to do today and can't avoid boudoir any longer. Need to bolster the fridge a bit too so a trip to the supermarket is in order! Medical appt this afternoon.

Have a good errand day everyone!

Couldn't get in earlier.again

No chance of me passing assault course either....

Cag i am not going to say much but I would have been surprised if it had been granteed. Pretty much all awards are going through to appeal now. Appeal. It is just part of the process these days. Almost like if they make it hard enough people won't fight for what they deserve.

ta da
laundry through washer
Laundry in dryer
deal with mother and a crap ton about medicines
check emails and note have a load of permission forms to print and return to school for tomo
stand on scales, be glad they weren't meaner, be sad that they were as truthful as they were
wonder where the fuck my lunch for today went and then remember told teenager he could raid the mini sausage rolls
organise the parents so they can do the things they need to today

Right off to get dressed, sort teenager out for school and get my ass out the door to work. Have good days

Yeah I know. I was sort of expecting it really, having heard the same :( I just had a vague glimmer of hope knowing other kids who’ve been awarded it straight off. And now the worry of what the fight will do to my MH which is shall we say rather fragile at present! It’s like they enjoy destroying people who dare to ask for a little help.

After their assessments in August we will be applying for EHCPs too which I’m dreading even more! I’m lucky though that I have an amazing friend who has done all this stuff and is wonderful at supporting others. She’s even written a letter for me to send to CAMHS quoting their own policies at them and showing they’ve broken them :o

Anyway I’ve written a list of all the things I need to do today, which includes phoning DLA and reading aforementioned letter. Also includes making GP apps for me and DS to get audiology referrals. Eek. But first, autism support group coffee morning. The chairperson isn’t there today so I don’t know anyone :( on the bus now and super nervous but at least it gets me out of the house. Then art award work which we’ve been putting off.

Quick hello, DD's cold much better so she is feeling more comfortable about being away for the weekend. I am making lists so we can finish packing tonight. That does mean I get full use of the laptop tomorrow evening though, as we have not yet managed to sort hers out.

Cag if that medicine is one of the triptylines, I used to take it at 6.00pm otherwise the following morning was a write-off! Sorry to hear the news about the DLA, it is just extra hassle that you don't need at the moment (appeal).

My DD used to be out every day doing stuff in the school holidays, it's gone from one extreme to the other!

Will be back on later today, must press on! Have a good day!

We did get DLA at the first time of asking last year but I was extremely surprised. I can only think that it was because DS is 15 now and the gaps between him and others his age are more significant in terms of independent living. I had to fight very hard for his EHCP a few years ago though. Had lots of handholding on this thread which was very much appreciated. Thank goodness you have such a knowledgeable friend Cag, I do too and she has been a godsend to me.

Erm, not much Flying to report.

Cag it's awful the way you are made to battle, when you are already so stressed battling with the original things for which you need support! I know they need to make sure but it doesn't seem morally right to make it all so difficult.

Glad to hear your DD feeling better Chic and in case I forget tomorrow, enjoy your child-free weekend!

Hope your day is going ok at work Hills!

🍒 waves to everyone else!

My husband was on one of the triptylines and it worked for his nerve pain but did knock him out. He's slightly insomniac so that was a bit of a positive! He's doing the flying at home today: errands and wiping all the sticky door and light switch spots. Plus endless laundry which we are nearly through to manageable levels.

Xpost Expletive waves! I remember when you (and two former fledglings) were going through EHCP battle X

Has anyone seen the news btw that Judith Kerr has died? Very . What an incredible life R I P Speaking of which I reckon Judith , were she alive, would be following the European elections with interest today. How bad must it be to go through all that she experienced and then see the resurgence of the far right across Europe. That Salvini guy in Italy and LePen in France and others are seriously worrying.

It is the European elections today in the UK isn't it? (No one has mentioned voting in their lists) Or have I got the date wrong? Ours are being held on Sun.

sc yes it's voting today, ours is right next to the school so I'll do it when I collect dd. I was sad about Judith Kerr too.
Hope your dd okay today with the PE test, it does sound like a very hard education system!

Sorry to hear of all the struggles for everyone

Ta das
Started daily routine and washing is on the line
Orthodontist appointment
Supermarket
Cup of tea in the sunshine
Sorted out plans for dinner tonight and tomorrow

To do
Collect ds
Finish daily routine and s&s bathroom
15 minutes tidying / cleaning in bedroom
Collect dd
Vote!

Also possibly make some berry and banana muffins as I have bananas that have gone very brown to use up.

X post Lisette how lovely to have a Flying DH!

Just received text from DD "ran 7 laps, 3.8 k, 10 obstacles, within time, passed"! Whoo hoo! So relieved for her because she had absolutely no confidence she could do it and marks count towards end of yr exams. Phew and phew again.

Another x post sorry

A cup of tea in sunshine sounds lovely Foxes! Very good to see it in your list!

Yes SC he's willing to do stuff and is participating with the routines with good humour so he knows it's errand day. He also likes ironing but I didn't know this when I married him, it just sort of developed. He will clean happily but doesn't see dirt with the same laser focus that I have. I must have a special gift .

EU Elections here today so no school for ds.

Oh well done to DD with the assault course!

Lisette Good for your dh! Wish mine had acquired domestic skills along the way! Think his are getting worse not better!

And thanks! Other schools here happily let 7 yr olds abseil out of windows down school buildings from a height of 10 metres without headgear ( no kidding) so it could have been worse . Mind you, if you dropped from that height headgear probably wouldn't be of much help to be fair!

Yup it’s amitriptyline. I was on this for years for fibro but had to come off it in pregnancy. He’s still increasing the dose gradually.

Coffee thing was good and nice to talk to people, I did spill tea on someone and consequently nearly cried from embarrassment I think I will try and make the effort to go more often though (it’s once a month).