Is this bonkers - show flannel?

[BoatyMcFuckfaceNC]

(Afterthought- daily mail/mirror journos you lazy cunting wankbadgers this is not for you to lift. Go report some news. I shall intersperse swears just in case. Ha.)

I like to make my bathroom feel as pampery as possible given it's poky and rented. I also use white flannels once or twice a day in my skincare routine so I keep a stash in a basket. Fuckbucket. When I was at a posh spa a few months ago I spent ten minutes studying how they'd rolled/tucked their flannels and now I use their technique so it feels even pamperier (word?). Cuntbiscuit.

Anyway, I've taken to leaving a 'show flannel' out on the side of the sink. I don't actually use it, I use the ones from the basket (which is on a shelf above eye level). But it sits there looking lovely and calm inviting me to look after myself. Arseweasel. I like to think guests might see it and feel they're at a fancy hotel or something. It's also angled at a perfect 45 degrees mirrored by the soap dish on the other side. Cuntfuckitybastardshitmonkey.

(Disclaimer: without being flippant it is very possible that I have OCD, I am under mental health support for anxiety and mood problems, before anyone gets too mean!)

Am I completely bonkers? Or do other people do this kind of thing too?

[TheThingsWeAdmitOnMN]

FlissPaps. I need to see a photo (or link) of the flannel fuckwit design before judgement can be passed. Cuntbadger

[Twistedwitch]

I aspire to show towels but I'm the kind of fucktastic daftie that forgets and dyes my hair with them. My mum has a fabulous collection of show towels. Wallow in your wanktastic bonkersness and enjoy.

[SpunBodgeSquarepants]

Never mind the OCD, OP - I think you might need that Tourette's sorting first

[ScuttlbuttHarpy]

Oh my fucking god this thread is brill, I dont have a show flannel, once I've konmari'd my house I may consider it.

[ScuttlbuttHarpy]

ooohhh forgot to add knobjockey

[3boys3dogshelp]

This is my favourite thread ever. Wankbadger. I've just woken one of my kids up laughing after your post finished me off spun stubbly pissflaps

[whitehandledkitchenknife]

OP you are a fucktastic jizzguzzling heroine . Howling with laughter.

[DireTires]

My grandmother used to have a fucking show bottle of washing up liquid. It even had a dress. A bastard dress for the fucking washing up liquid show bottle.

I loved it. The fucking nut sucker.

[3boys3dogshelp]

I should add that I don't have a show or any flannel. Titwank. I count it as a win if my hand towel is still in the bathroom at the end of the day. Fuck knows what my family do with them all ineffectually mop up spills off the floor then scatter them about the place for me to find like a particularly shitty treasure hunt

[FlutteringCunts]

I live this thread! Not much to add on the flannel front.
Camelfuckers

[Isadora2007]

😂
I know it's not saying much as we are only on the 9th... but best thread of 2017

[N0tfinished]

No piece of haberdashery has a show life in our house. Babydoors. They are all used thoroughly and have no pretensions to grandeur. Arseicing. Grab one, clean yer gob, then drop on floor for a quick foot-mopping. Boil wash & repeat. Pisspenis

[Namechangingbastard]

Oh now I really want to buy a posh flannel. fannybracket. How do you fold it? Twatkisser.

[bibbitybobbityyhat]

I think you would love my dbrother op. Bumcrack. Although he is gay and in a ltr, and you are no doubt very happily cuntingly paired off yourself, I'd even suggest he is your shithead of a soulmate. Get this: in his utterly pristine and perfect downstairs loo, there is NO hand towel, just a pile of sparkling arse large white thin flannels rolled up in a basket bugger. Each guest uses a twatting new one of these to dry their hands and drop it into a small laundry bin on their way out. It is honestly wank like being at the dick Savoy cunt Hotel!

[BingBongBingBong]

I want a fucking show flannel now. Loving the creative swears, too. Cumbubble wankstain asshats

[DireTires]

bibbitybobbityyhat I think that sounds positively wonderful. Shitface. No show flannels but rather spa like ambience. Lady garden.

[StrangeLookingParasite]

Oh god, I've nearly hurt myself laughing at this.

Arsebiscuit.

[VivienneWestwoodsKnickers]

This is epic. I'm off sick with a migraine, so have the screen turned down to near off and am trying to read without getting nauseous, but am now giggling to myself, fuck nuggets, and feeling better already, skittletits.

OP, perfectly normal, but not in my house as my DP would use them for his athletes foot or something.

[Yankeedoodledickhead]

Every thread should be like this one arsefistingbumfuckery

[BreakfastAtSquiffanys]

I am really truly laughing out loud at this thread.
Can't read it properly as my shoulders are shaking so much
Wankmonkey

[CondensedMilkSarnies]

I have fucking cunting show wanky towels. They make my jizz buggering bathroom look the bollocks

[MardAsSnails]

When I got my first house and everything was fucknuggetting tatty as arsebiscuiting hell, I had my two blue show flannels as my fucking cheap tarting the miserable fuckin bathroom up.

Small thing make big fucking differences.

Not now. I'm now a lazy cunt. that swear wasn't even for DM purposes - I just found it an appropriate word

[CondensedMilkSarnies]

I reckon we're safe from the Daily Fail but I bet Home and Gardens will snap this up!

[WallToWallDrugs]

My mum has cocksnortingfuckstick show towels, and ninefingeredshitehawk show soap.

Love this thread . Cocknocker.

[LoisWilkersonsLastNerve]

I have a motherfucking show flannel. Its very 70's looking so I believe it puts me on the hipster category. Not that that is anything to brag about. Shitkickers.