May-be this time - Fledglings flutter through May 2016 (Flylady thread)

[CotswoldStrife]

Welcome all - and thanks to SpareCrust for leading us through April.

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chat along the way.

Link to the Flylady website

Don't let the somewhat sickly and barftastic language of the site put you off: the underlying system is sound!

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework; which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with masses of bumph. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

** And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
• It didn't get into a mess overnight - it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings

Oh and don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t! . Some of us have been on here for years and some of us natter rather a lot – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers are very, very welcome!

And that probably doesn't make sense but tbh the internet and technology has pissed me off and I am not even checking email atm. I will probably come to regret that at a later date.

must rescue neighbour and bring ds home for tea. Tatty pie.

Take care einstein

I am Cagliostro. Doing lots of stuff that is good for me. Just mn isn't iyswim. But not able to kick the mn habit atm who knows maybe it will happen sooner rather than later.

Ah, I know what you mean. My MN habits have definitely changed over the years, and I am now more of a lurker than I was. I tend to not post on most of the threads I read, or if I do, I don't actually say much, and I don't usually weigh in on any controversial topic anymore. It's mostly this thread and a few other long running support threads that I am here for these days.

I managed one productive thing - printer is finally set up. Should actually do dinner now. And more laundry. Ugh.

What I meant was, the non-supportive threads were bad for me, being a heavy poster was bad for me, but threads like this are beneficial. For me I mean. :)

Evening all,

Lots of lurking and not much posting from me too, I keep posting on odd random threads and then walking away, but I seem to be on the allotment thread most of the time at the moment, it's such a busy time of year for gardening. I have cheered up a bit after last weeks stressy moments, but am continuing to feel a bit under the cosh with the impending exam and DD has had an incident at school which needed a bit of intervention from me.

SC - well done to DD on the ballet show, it all sounds amazing. My DD is still in the junior show, but at the time of the next one she could be in either junior or senior, her age group will be right on the cutoff. However she is talking about giving it up altogether so it might not happen at all (although my tap class might end up out there). I have persuaded her to drop tap and just do ballet, but her enthusiasm is definitely waning, however her ambition is to be in musical theatre so giving up ballet may not be a very wise move .

On the plus side for DD, Grey - you will be pleased to know that DD and DH are now fully paid up members of the local archery club.

Toffee - that's awful about the psychiatrist, she really should know better. Poor DS1. Food is one of my DS's biggest issues, he is hardly eating at school but eating a lot when he gets home, not easy.

Oh, Flying. Could I add to the endorsements of Barkeeper's Friend, it's great stuff and the only thing I've ever found that gets green corrosion marks off toilet seat hinges.

We are the proud owners of a new dishwasher - ours packed up last week after 13 years of faithful service, I can't believe how quiet this one is. Dh installed it, which involved a lot of cursing, swearing and general chaos, but it is all done now. He has really pulled his finger out on the housekeeping front after my mini-meltdown last week, hoping it lasts. Generally things are a lot tidier at the moment, helped by the good weather and DCs spending more time outdoors.

Welcome Saturn, I have a non-shiny cream composite sink and I find the best thing for it is to scrub the dirt off and then use Vanish (the clothes stain remover) in hot water. Any oxy type bleach would probably work.

Welcome kruck that sounds right to me! Although I admit I copied the first post from the lovely SC and actually have no idea what the power of three is

My big tidy is imperceptable going very slowly. I order the dancewear online (Monday) and it arrived today! The shoes are a bit big but I think an insole in them will help to get some wear out of them

SC take it easy with the back - there just isn't anything you can do until it sorts itself out.

Have to agree with watching your internet 'useage' for want of a better phrase. Every so often I try and limit myself to only positive threads (this one counts!) otherwise you can get sucked in and waste energy and time.

Time for the links!

The daily summary for Wednesday (also available on the Flylady website at flight plan which should update automatically each day.

**

Baby-step no 25 - keep doing your routines

We are in Zone 4 this week: the master bedroom

Spend 15 mins decluttering in Zone 4.

When you have finished decluttering, the detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 4 is here

Mission for Wednesday dusting the upper levels

The daily focus for Wednesday is: anti-procrastination

The monthly habit for May is moving in May!

IIRC the Power of Three technique is that if you are feeling totally overwhelmed, and feel like even the babysteps/missions etc are too much, you just decide 3 things that need doing. And do them. Which is easier because there are only 3, rather than an endless list.

Should really take my own advice here

Hope DD is ok Who and I'm at the archery club! :)

I've not even continued with the laundry or owt. Apart from reading a book in 2 days. Oops.

Must get the living room sorted for pupil tomorrow. Feeling crappy though and on ABs due to tooth issues. Blah.

Morning :) I've started to think about the weekly home blessing. My vacuum is on the fritz so ten minutes will just about do my living room (I have to use the hose on my hands and knees the whole time)

I was wondering what days you all do this on? I have DS (1yo) and DNephew (10 months) all day everyday in the week so it will be pretty hard with them around. So probably a Saturday or Sunday.

Any hoover reccomendations? £200 absolute max. No dyson cordless for me

Morning!

Yes, I need to follow my own advice too! I'd be happy if I just got three things done here today!

Back slightly less crumped though this morning but still hurting and now everyone has gone to school/work and I have slowly fed animals, and finished the morning routine I am going to attempt to have a hot bath. The only problem is that it has steep sides and I am not entirely sure I will be able to get out unassisted. Oh well ... I shall keep the phone within grabbing distance!

Sorry to hear about tooth issues Cag. Here's to a speedy recover !

Agree with Cotswold and everyone else! I am on the Internet far too much but as an expat it is a life-line frankly and thats my excuse and I amsticking to it. However, I find Mumsnet to be quite a combatative place when I step out of this friendly thread ... . Tend to stick to factual (Flying, cooking, pet threads) nowadays. (The Brexit threads have become unnecessarily nasty and contentious thanks to just three or four aggressive posters which is sad when it is such a crucial and important issue whichever camp one is in.) Msnset is still brilliant if you need ideas or answers to obscure factual or practical questions though!

So, yes, take care Einstein

And I am sure you are right to eschew the Internet and spend more time on the allotment Whoknows! Far healthier for body and mind!

Hope your dd is ok at school and good luck with continuing exam revision.

Also, whey hey to new dws and helpful dhs!!

And whey hey to you tap-dancing in the annual show! Hope you can persuade your dd to continue if that is what she wants! (DD and all of her classmates continually go through huge wobbles about continuing or not. Totally, totally normal judging from my conversations with other ballet parents. This usually happens in the summer when there are just a few workshops instead of regular classes (when dd gets deeply in to horse-riding instead). I've learnt now to step back and let her dither and flip-flop and come to her own decision and so far, although its been a close call at various times, she has chosen to go back.)

Cag if your dd has been doing gym and is good at trampolining and she's fairly flexible then I am sure 9 yrs is not too old to start ballet. I wouldn't leave it any longer though.

Had better get on! Big wing flaps to all! And have a good anti-procrastination day everyone!

x post Kruck

Sounds as if you have your hands very full! I do the home blessing on a Monday morning because it sets me up (psychologically more than anything) for the week ahead. Helps me feel more on top of things! Superficially anyway!! But I have to confess that I have an intermittent cleaner who comes on a Friday (if she does come!) and so my Monday home bleugh literally consists of hoovering up the centre of rooms on the ground floor and emptying bins and doing a bit of dusting and polishing, giving the bathroom a slightly longer s & S, and generally setting the house to rights, which has usually been totally destroyed after the weekend.

I was going to suggest you get the young 'uns to help but see they are a bit young for that yet! Tbh, I think you are doing brilliantly to even consider Flying when looking after infants!!

If you do do the home bleugh at weekends though, would advise sticking to a very minimal going over just to keep things ticking along. The theory is, that as you declutter, and keep tidying and cleaning the zones, the home bleugh will be take much less time to achieve iyswim.

No hoover advice as have two ancient beasts but think Knitting might be our resident expert on that subject! If I bought one now though I would be looking at the lightest model on the market!

The other suggestion is to do the home bleugh over five or seven days of the week, doing one or two of the following tasks per day

here.

Personally, I force persuade dh and dd to help me change the sheets every Saturday. I strip the beds and get all the fresh linen ready in advance and then we have a "family bed making hour" (well it usually takes about 40 mins ). Much quicker and less boring task that way, especially when large double duvets are involved.

SC I love the term home bleugh I think the weekend is my best bet, I'd have to drag the kids round the house with me to do it otherwise and then they'd just destroy the room I was hoovering/polishing. They are on opposite nap schedules so one is always up.

I was thinking about a cleaner earlier Possibly they could do the home bleugh minus the changing sheets and emptying bins in 2 hours? Then when all the decluttering is done I could do it myself. I just think people would judge me for having a cleaner as a SAHM.

Morning all,

I don't really do the home bleugh in one go any more in fact I haven't done the dusting part of it for weeks but I try and make sure I just keep on top of basic hoovering (Dyson cordless for me, bought with Nectar points), swish and swipe and bed sheets changed at the weekend.

SC - I haven't been onto the Brexit threads but if they are anything like the Cologne ones I'm staying away. DD dropped ballet once before but went back after half a term, however now she's older it would be harder to catch back up I imagine. The issues are mainly with the tap class (disruptive classmates, rush to get there on time) so maybe just ballet will work. However I think she has too many hobbies on the go to be sustainable with the increasing school workload and dance has been least favourite for a while now.

Kruck re: the cleaner - do whatever works best for you and your family - let others hoik their judgey pants with abandon!! I only work about 12-16 hrs a week atm and only have one child but a cleaner (who does ironing also) frankly keeps me sane. Tbh, it is the discipline of her coming (meaning that I have to tidy up before she comes) that is as valuable as the actual cleaning she achieves if that makes sense!

Whoknows The logistics do sound difficult! It is tricky trying to juggle all the extra-curricular stuff. Here, as everything is based on the school calendar, it is all do-able when it is just the ordinary run of the mill schedule, but when it comes to this time of the year and we have exams, end of term shows, end of term demonstrations, school fetes etc etc (which are all crammed in to a six week period for some reason) it all goes completely mad (and that's just with one child)! Plus I doubt we could afford more than one extra-curricular activity atm. Ballet is getting increasingly costly with payment req for lessons, shoes/tights/hairpins/practice leotards/warm-up attire etc, then pay for summer workshops, then end-of-year show costumes (frankly would rather pay than have to make the ruddy things!), then tickets to the show, then DVD of the show!! Then all the costs involved in hosting relatives staying to see the show! It is all fun but the costs are endless ... .

Having said that, dd has expressed an interest in badminton, so off to search for a state-subsidised summer course ... of which there are thankfully quite a few!

Morning folks :)

Feeling sooo much brighter today. Made it outdoors for a little while yesterday so I think that helped.

Getting some laundry done in a minute and have already planned the day's learning with the DCs. Shakespeare, Spanish and poetry mostly. :)

Can't deny I heaved a sigh of relief when I got a text saying my Wednesday pupil can't come to her lesson tonight! It means I won't have to rush back from Brownies in a taxi rather than a bus (which also meant I'd only make £4.50 instead of £10!) so I'm not losing out on too much, and can chill a bit more today. But feel like I've got a bit more energy to achieve other stuff.

Henry Hoover! Cleaning lady recommended it. However it is heavy to lug up stairs so if you have very steep ones, maybe not.

Otherwise the only hoover that I've liked has been a Miele low one (not upright anyway) cannot remember the model as I gave it to my mum because hers was driving me insane...

Three kids in school.

recycling out

otherwise...will try and achieve something today. Yesterday I managed to go to the tip, cook a shepherd's pie and keep playroom tidy.

Glad you are feeling brighter today Cag!

Kruck forgot to mention main point is that looking after 2 infants, 1 yr and under, is a full-time job in my book, so you are totally justified in getting help with the chores!!

Can't claim credit for 'home bleugh' term - can't quite remember - but think that was PA's doing! (A fledgling of long-standing who happily still swoops in from time to time.)

Poor heroic dh is doing both school runs and all the dog walks for second day running (half school day today) poor man. I think he wishes he was travelling as usual.

At least I will be able to cook supper tonight (roast chickens with all trimmings) if I start early. And have managed to do volunteering through very kind co-worker dropping around huge bundles of donated clothes to sort. So that's my task for this afternoon.

SC, I'm going to talk to OH about it and see what he thinks. He's supers supportive and doesn't care what state the house is in when he gets home so I think he'll be all for it if it helps me. Seems like we have good men in our lives I feel like I've been giving myself too much slack because of having the boys but if I don't do it then I just get stressed out more. I'm finding FlyLady so manageable and I'm already seeing really good progress just using the few minutes I get here and there.

I am very of the roast dinner, I can't cook to save my life unfortunately. I hope the clothes sorting goes smoothly :)

Knitting brilliant idea about Henry! I remember my dad having one and it was practically indestructible

Ah that's good SC - nice that you can still volunteer but in an adapted way!

Can't advise on the vacuum, our Vax is a bit worse for wear. I too find myself using the hose bit more and more now.

Right, DCs getting some fresh air, I've got some laundry on and am trying to ignore the fact that when I changed out of my jeans to wash them, I put the clean trousers on inside out and then we're going to get on with learning stuff.

Who dd gave up ballet at just your dd's age - she found it too technically difficult and she didn't like the girls in her group, and was a bit awkward and tall to feel happy in a leotard (if she could just have got to the skirt bit it would have been alright but she was on a low grade) She is also very suited to Musical Theatre instead, and has done well in that...with the proviso that....

At Secondary she was a bit too shy to push into the actingve be/singing in all the big productions at school, although fine in smaller classes, and it was at this point she began to really regret having given up ballet as it would have been a chance to gain more skills and stage "poise". And she loves dancing and wants to keep fit so it would have been better than some other forms of exercise, which she found boring. She has twice said to me she wished she still did ballet as it gave more options. She doesn't regret not playing an instrument in an orchestra or singing in a choir, she just likes the idea of dancing! I would let her see as many older girls dancing as possible to get her eye in. Or move ballet class. Or plan to go back next term, but set the date firmly, if there is any doubt in her mind.

Dd was playing the guitar to herself last night. She'll be a star yet! No lessons, and she teaches herself.

Maths GSCE tomorrow. He's doing Higher which is something, at least they think he is capable of Maths; I never think of him as a mathematical person but it must mean he is smarter than he looks. Gunning for a B. If he just gets a C, well I shall be quite miffed, and it is down to laziness, as I've asked him again and again if he wants help with anything or doesn't understand anything.

Not much flying, but a reasonably productive work day today.

And whoop - I found out that I got onto the second summer school I applied for and have got a bursary I didn't know was available to cover the costs!!

Bank situation seems to be getting sorted too, I hope SC - in the middle of switching accounts and some payments seemed to have fallen through the cracks. Hopefully OK now.