May-be this time - Fledglings flutter through May 2016 (Flylady thread)

[CotswoldStrife]

Welcome all - and thanks to SpareCrust for leading us through April.

If you are struggling with C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome) and S.T.U.F.F. (Something That Undermines Family Fun) then this is the thread where we (loosely) follow the step-by-step Flylady housekeeping system (in our own unique, relaxed style) with lots of support and chat along the way.

Link to the Flylady website

Don't let the somewhat sickly and barftastic language of the site put you off: the underlying system is sound!

This little-and-often system is designed so that you can follow a series of steps and routines each day (which gradually become second nature) in zones of the house which are designated weekly; defining and minimising housework; which in theory should leave you with loads more time to do something more interesting instead!

At the same time it is intended to reduce that panicky "rabbit in headlights" feeling when you are overwhelmed and everything needs doing all at once. No problem if you miss a day or two; just jump right back in and it will all come around next month again!

It's up to you, but we advise not signing up to receive the Flylady e-mails as you will be swamped with masses of bumph. All the information you need will be linked here on a daily basis.

From the first of the month, we will be following Flylady's steps and routines using a three-pronged approach (dependent on the stage everyone is at):

• start or repeat baby steps
• repeat baby steps + do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone
• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

** And if you are really enthusiastic and have finished decluttering - you can go on to detailed deep cleaning in each zone.

There are three key points to keep in mind throughout:

• No perfectionism allowed - this is harder than you would imagine and many of us on this thread struggle with this one.
• You are never behind - just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
• It didn't get into a mess overnight - it won't get tidy over night - accept it will take time to get on top of things.

If you are new; then trying to spend 15mins decluttering daily and doing the babysteps is a good way to start. Some of us (mentioning no names!) can have scary looking ‘ta-da’ lists but don't let that worry you. Do what you can, anything is better than nothing, and don't judge yourself against others.

If all else fails, a brew + the power of three technique + a bit of support on here can work wonders!

Here's the launch pad for more experienced fledglings

Oh and don’t let it put you off if we appear a bit cliquey, we really aren’t! . Some of us have been on here for years and some of us natter rather a lot – but all lurkers, intermittent returnees, oldies and newcomers are very, very welcome!

Well I guess that makes it easier to sort through. Re the paperwork; I've been seriously considering scanning all my paper documents and then shredding the originals (with obvious exceptions!) Its a scary step to take though.

DH and I found another house we liked the look of and went to see it today. It is a 1930s house and has a lovely mixture of ultra modern and some period features. We really loved it and said how comfortable it felt inside, that we could see ourselves living there. So we have made an offer and fingers crossed for Monday when we'll hear back...

I couldn't help but grin when I saw on the bookshelf the Mumsnet Guide to Toddlers!! AND she had a toilet brush

the horror blue

I am going the otherway and getting rid of as much computer based systems as possible. I would like to go off grid as much as possible. Done with modern technology and its uselessness/high obsoletion rate. 7 financial years is only 3 lever arch folders for me and 1 for ds. It is not a lot. It is all the blooming note books etc that I have collected

Gah! Discovered a major banking SNAFU at this time on a Saturday night. Not fun.

Here's hoping that this house will work out, Grey.

Hope your mum visit went well, Knitting.

Re IKEA storage, (was it Toffee asking?) we have some Trofast, but I'm not all that happy with it as the drawers hold less than you'd think and don't seem terribly strong. This time round, we've just got for loads of Billy bookcases, because as Einstein said, everyone needs more bookshelves! In the meantime the boys can put toys on them until their libraries inevitably expand to fill them.

Today I have mostly been doing weeding. Or at least this afternoon. This morning was swimming run and grocery shopping. DH has also managed to cut the front jungle lawn, insert some extra shelves in Billies (see above), fix the wardrobe hanging rail that collapsed on Thursday evening, and play football with the boys. We've also finally got various extraneous bits out of the house and into the garage. Exhausted now!

Love our trofast, hate the billy bookcases. How funny.

Not managed to finish all the jobs I started today. Boo hiss. And the filler that I was supposed to use for the wall has gone moldy. Discovered AFTER filling the sodding hole so there is a very odd smell. I might have to dig it back out and get some fresh stuff tomo. Ewwwww.

Hot water bottle and bed will be on the agenda shortly. just a few more things I have to do (like put bedding on the bed) before I can collapse for the night.

Welcome LazyCake, good to have you with us!

I'm having a cooking -free weekend - woo hoo! DD is having a growth spurt at the moment which has included her feet. I have been asking her for a while if her shoes are OK but had her feet measured today and now need to go shopping for new shoes, preferably tomorrow. Also need to order some new dance shoes (it was a struggle with a pair earlier this week that made me drag her to the shop, although she still said they were ok!).

Grey I think the soap stuff from hotels is really useful (shower caps especially) as you can either use it or reuse the bottle. I don't know why I take the coffee and then forget about it ignore it until it goes out of date.

I may have bought a couple more books at the jumble sale today. I also bought a game (DD loves board games) and opened it to check that there were enough pieces in it to play, forgot to check that the instructions were enclosed though. Hooray for the internet!

Links up next!

The daily summary for Sunday (also available on the Flylady website at flight plan which should update automatically each day).

**

Baby-step no 22 - making your control journal and just in case you need it extra link to the 15 steps

We are moving into Zone 4 the master bedroom

Missions are posted Monday to Friday, free day today - hooray!

The daily focus for Sunday is: renew your spirit

The monthly habit for May is moving in May!

Welcome Lazy! Sorry about the illness. Makes it all so tough.

Stressed to the freakin eyeballs today, so much to do, so little time, even less energy.

removing all those excess books the other day has meant I was able to tidy the bookcases, and they actually look smart now instead of repositories of vertical and horizontal clutter.

And...the weird thing is that getting rid of some sentimental items or items of value, has given me strength to continue..and I managed to remove a few more things from playroom. A picture shedding coloured sand, a brass pot, several Indian painted elephants, random photos on wall, and a chemistry set (okay that went under the sofa).

So satisfying, and I feel so brave. And then you think...why did I stress about this, it is easy!!!!

Ha ha Knitting ! I know what you mean about once you start, you wondered why you left it so long! Have you read Kondo's 'The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up'? It is a bit bonkers in places, but there is a lot of useful stuff in there too, especially related to letting go of things that were dragging you down and how good you feel afterwards.

Yes, I read it last year on Kindle (perhaps lack of physical book meant it didn't really stick in my pyschii (sp?)) Tbh when she started talking about throwing everything away I just thought...and the TOYS? Clearly you have no toys Woman! Luckily the toys have somewhat receded, even my 14 year old has finally grown out of Lego...if not his train set..

Dd has kondoed her drawers beautifully. After watching a few youtube videos..harumph, no need for a book there..For someone with as many clothes as dd it was rather essential to fold them in the magical way. I don't actually have any clothes, my wardrobe is a sad dismal disgrace overflowing with husband's clothes. I was rather taken by Konmari's thing about stroking your clothes before you fold them or hanging them up lovingly; I really need to show my clothes (few as they are) a bit more love and stop covering them in compost.

On that note..I have potted up two large window boxes
cooked lunch
been to Mass
coffee with friend
reduced ds1 to screaming fit because I mentioned Poetry (he has Eng Lit unseen poem tomorrow) I asked him to read short Yeats just to see what he thought, he read it through v quickly and threw it down, saying, No Enjambment, it is not a real poem. Enjambment??? wtf he knows nothing but he knows that poems are meant have enjambment (anyway the poem did in fact have enjambment but sad to say he didn't even recognise it) He is now watching BGT as a form of tranquillizer and is breathing heavily. He is a bit stressed at thought of tomorrow, as he wants to do well in English but I am beginning to think he is not suited to the A level..

Dd is in a very bad mood since the throwing up incident/funfair. A friend came round today and she told me to send friend away because she wasn't in the mood to see anyone. But was unable to tell friend herself a simple excuse would have done I'm sure and it would have been so much politer.

Another busy day here, but mostly spent outside the house with our unplanned 'growth spurt' shopping trip. We managed to make the most out of the day, even squeezing in a meeting with a visiting 'angry bird' at a fast food restaurant golden arches

Will post the links before crawling into bed (after taking off makeup, priorities ...) and face the day again tomorrow. It's going to be a better week determined

The daily summary for Monday - also available at flight plan which should update automatically each day.

**

Baby-step no 23 - afternoon routines (home from school/work/pre dinner)

We are in Zone 4 this week: the master bedroom

Spend 15 mins decluttering in Zone 4.

When you have finished decluttering, the detailed cleaning list (if you are at that stage) for Zone 4 is here

Mission for Monday cleaning under the bed!

The daily focus for Monday is: weekly home blessing hour

The monthly habit for May is moving in May!

[Creaks on to thread wearily]

Bloody hell we have just about survived death by ballet spectacle this weekend (and many, many, many hrs of rehearsals prior to that). First year in proper senior show and dd was "on call" for 22 hrs all in all and is understandably exhausted with (previously) knackered toe, dodgy leg muscle - hideously tired but triumphant. She was at the stifling hot theatre from 9am to 11pm on Sat and from 1pm to just before 9pm yesterday (ie she was "on call" for 22 hrs, dancing for 4 of those which doesn't sound much but it adds up with constant rehearsals, warm ups and warm downs). Of the two, Sat was obviously the most gruelling with stifling temperatures - the theatre resembled something out of that peculiar Herzog film set in a S. American rain forest - you could literally see the steam pouring off the audience and it wasn't dry ice! DD did so well but it was all a bit much really (we are totally cream crackered and we were there only half of that time). She could barely put one foot in front of the other when she went off to school today and looked very white with huge bags below her eyes. I am praying she will be ok as the day goes on.

On the positive front though, she didn't make one mistake: phew!!! (although quite a few slipped slightly when some numpty technician had over-enthusiastically damped down the stage at one point) and having started off dreading the whole thing and being terrified of dancing in front of two audiences of about 350-400 people, she ended up really happy and enthusiastic about the whole experience!! She had been particularly worried about the quick changes between acts this year and her entrances and exits (all done in extreme darkness) and there is so much crapola on stage she was terrified of tripping over something or totally missing the exit!!) Thankfully all went well and she wasn't remotely nervous on the second day. The transformation from "I hate being on stage" to "I loved being on stage" was quite amazing to behold! A definite right of passage. She also loved the fact that -now being in the seniors - she was required to bring specific items of make up including dramatic eye liner and lipstick and they were all trusted to do their own hair and eye make up (with guidance) etc. But I think the best thing of all was them all being able to get up close and personal with the professionals who were absolutely breath-takingly amazing!! One of dd's dances came straight after a fantastic pas-de-deux with two of the professionals so she could see them standing in the wings from about 2.5 feet away; she simply could not believe their strength and elevation - she said they seemed like a different species!! - but a different species who were all very lovely and encouraging and happy to sign programmes afterwards!! She also commented on how the sweat poured off everyone - the floor was dripping with it - and how behind the scenes it stank to high heaven A great lesson in the reality of the sheer effort that goes in to making it all look easy!

Anyway, um, back to Flying ...

... the house is now littered with half a dozen bouquets in saucepans, tights and ballet shoes and bits of costume, headdresses, remnants of snacks and packed lunches, discarded water bottles, empty wine bottles, conjealed plates of spag bol (served to visitors post show yesterday), conjealing cheese boards and salads, various foot baths dotted about (I was so cream crackered last night I just left it all and fell in to bed) and oh the poor dog is crossing his paws through being short-changed on walks and having to make do with just a five minute jaunt to the nearest lamp post and back!

Dog first I think and then back to catch up on thread ... !

Big waves to all!

Sorry, apologies for splurging all that on here, reading it back, that was a bit of a longer post than anticipated!

Very, very rudely forgot to wave to everyone as well! [flaps wings]

Hope everyone ok

BBL to catch up!

The show sounds fantastic, I'm so glad she enjoyed it. I had a similar transformation years ago, almost crying as the curtains went back but by the end of the first routine I loved it! Not that professional a show though, it sounds quite an undertaking! Well done to her (and I hope she's OK at school today).

Will crack on, need to do some internet bill paying/ordering and not through mumsnet so shouldn't really be here right now

Spare how wonderful; it is not just being proud is it? It is the idea that they are growing as a person (sorry bit barftastic) through performance and skills, as well as making you proud mama. We give everything though, don't we, just watching them and getting them out there all that behind the scenes stuff mothers do so that they even start learning those skills Definitely one of the pluses of parenting.

Anyway, ds1 has gone off to a day of exams, Eng Lit and RE. Which meant on the way there he wished to talk about Gordon Ramsay's Kitchen Nightmares so we had a good laugh about that...

Ds2 was despatched to school by DH. Last night I washed his school blazer, helpfully I thought as it was a bit sweaty, only to discover that I had washed various little name cards he had written out to hand to people when they asked him annoying questions...and they had gone all blurred...So then dh and I frantically tried to think of ways of not mentioning it to him, whilst replacing said cards (only we weren;t quite sure what was actually written on them as some had completely faded) and sneaking replacements into his blazer. I was lucky to escape the Armageddon which ensued when he did find out, as I was driving ds1 to his exam; I think it helped that dh was able to blame it on me Anyway he went to school, so now I am

Tidying up. sigh. Loads to do. Will post later when have achieved more "pure" decluttering.

Thanks both! Sorry if that was terribly pfb below! It's just that I found the whole thing quite stressful and although dd is a good dancer, she is not a natural performer, and it is a difficult balancing act between pushing her to reach her potential and pushing her to the point where she curls up in a sobbing heap! So it was all a bit tense over the w/e and carthartic to 'vent' on here as ever!

Are you still dancing now Cotswold? I think it is a great thing to keep up throughout one's life if you can.

Knitting yes I am unashamedly v proud of dd for getting through it all! They look like grown up adults on stage, very assured and poised, and then when you see them in mufty, greeting their parents afterwards in the foyer, they look like shuffling children again who are looking at the floor!

Hope your ds1 doesn't find his exams too stressful today and that your ds2 isn't too indignant about the missing cards when he gets home!

Apologies. Still haven't caught up with thread. Taken furry one for long - much needed - trudge through park and have nipped to local toy shop to buy present and card for colleague's son.

House still a pit! Only an hour or so to go before school pick up so must go and try and tame the worst of it before then!

Waves to everyone!

Don't fret, SC - it's interesting to read about!

Thanks Blue Congrats on your extremely busy and productive weekend! Banking SNAFU does not sound good though! Hope it is now resolved! (And you have reminded me that I desperately need to do some weeding before it all gets more out of control!) Also, v well done re your boys' play room organisation!

A warm welcome to LazyCake! Sorry to hear you are unwell though, which must make things v tough.

Knitting v well done on sorting the bookshelves and on chucking the things of sentimental value - it sounds like you have had a definite break through moment - a really encouraging post!

And whoo hoo to Flying Scotsman! (My parent's old neighbour used to have a garden gate which contained one of its old pipes - it made a particular sort of pinging noise when opened.)

By the sounds of it your ds1 will do well in English - enjambment or no enjambment!

Grey very best of luck re: offer on second house today! I hope it is accepted [fingers crossed]

Grey and Knitting I found Kondo incredibly irritating I'm afraid although I know she is speaking sense in places. Did I imagine that bit where she started stacking carrots vertically in the fridge or am I losing my marbles?

Knitting your poor dd re: the fair. It is one of those teenage rites of passage I'm afraid. I hope she recovers her spirits soon.

Hope you are ok Cag and feeling a bit less stressed today

A cooking free weekend sounds absolutely blissful Cotswold!

Hope the DIY is continuing ok Einstein. I'm with you on the paper filing!

Toffee I think the idea is that we are meant to feel honoured when the parish priest drops by. I don't though. Unfortunately his visits always involve a request for money and always uncannily coincides with the moment when hot food is emerging from the oven!!

Whoknows hope revision is progressing well x

Dh has taken pity on me (it is raining) and on dd's poor feet (blistered) and is heroically doing the school run by car [bliss]

Ta da:
animals
dog walk
trip to toy shop
collected up all mugs and plates and glasses from around the house!
picked up all extraneous bits of laundry and 'stuff' from ground floor floor
emptied dw
filled dw
cleaned down kitchen surfaces
made lunch for dh
two loads laundry in and out
cleaned out rabbits thoroughly

No where near enough but need to start thinking about after dinner snacks and supper. Also want to avoid mess again go out for another walk for a bit.

Tomorrow is another day.

Big waves to all fledglings and anyone I've missed!

um, that should have read 'after school snacks' not after dinner ones! [Although, yes we are that greedy!]

Hi all - can I join you? Needing a bit of motivation and this looks like it might help

Thanks SC I do feel a bit better today. It was all building up and I was overwhelmed. I still have shedloads to do though!

Lovely to read about your DD's achievements at dancing! Sounds like a wonderful experience that she will carry her whole life. :)

DD had a great day yesterday too - rehearsal for a gym show in the morning, which she really enjoyed, and then the dancing ceremony thing in the evening. She actually got through to the final round of one contest which is amazing as she's been there so much less time than all the other kids her age. So she got a medal for that as well as her exam medal. She was very upset last night as it was over (she's always like that though, it builds up and up and then she crashes after) but I'm trying to drum into her "don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened" :)

And it was a lovely event anyway. It was so sweet to see her dancing, she was definitely nervous dancing in a new place and with more people watching, but she did so well! And it was rather adorable when her partner asked her to dance at the social dance intervals too :o

It was amazing seeing the teens dance as well, they were really fantastic and very inspiring! I think though in a way the best thing to come out of yesterday was that she was chatting away with all the other girls there. She's found it pretty hard to 'break into' the group in lessons, as she's such a newbie in a long-established class (also most of them are from one other country so there is naturally a slight language barrier) but they were all running about together and really she didn't seem to be 'on the outside' anymore.

Anyway battery about to die so I'm off to ignore my to-do list IRL instead of online :o

Welcome Back! :) :)

Ds1 seems fine after exam. He said he didn't want to think about it, and missed a part of RE question on Communion of Saints (which is not what you might think, and I got that wrong too) Unseen Poem was Apple Raid by Vernon Scannell I think, he said he wrote two pages on it, which is better than not writing two pages..off to google it now.

Have been reading a fascinating book rather too late..how to Ace Your GSCEs all about how revision textbooks are not worth the time, nor is notetaking, the best thing is to work directly from the primary source, your own classwork (if you have any) or the Exam board Textbook. I think it may have been a mite too sophisticated for ds1 once he reached the third chapter, which will account for why he never put this advice into practice, but also gave up taking notes or writing revision cards..

have made roast pork and roast potatoes for supper
also decluttered some books from ds1 room, including the Spanish and RE section (which went upstairs)
dusted mantlepiece
changed his sheets
hoovered his floor
two washes on
went to charity shop, bought an old grey green Denby casserole but discarded two bags of stuff

sort of kept to diet, but fell at the last post to a spinach pasty from the Middleeastern grocer..I was doing so well with the low carbs but extreme hunger seized me at 4pm. At least there was lots of green in there.