Long overdue cleaning frenzy - I can feel one of my heads coming on.......

[Notgrumpyjustquiet]

I've sat on my arse all weekend but I can't put it off any longer. We've got friends coming next weekend so it will need a quick wipe round again nearer the time but it's fucking disgusting worth getting on top of it now in case I end up busier than I thought later in the week. To do list in no particular order, doesn't all need to be done today:

Bathroom especially whatever has been squeezed out of someone's face on to the mirror

500 loads of washing (luckily it's a good drying day)

Kitchen including inside the fridge because I won't be able to stand guard over it all day dispensing beer to our ridiculously houseproud guests and I refuse to accept OH's bold assertion that 'they won't notice'.

Disinfect normal kitchen bin & recycling bins

200 acres of wooden floors

Hoover stairs & upstairs

Change the bed

Toddlerproof the front room or at least put a catch on the outside if the door

Toddlerproof the back garden

Toddlerproof the entire fucking house

Put curtains up in bedroom (need OH to sort the rail out which I've only asked him to do 300 times)

Conservatory windows

Haircut tomorrow

Sort front garden including trim the hedge because next door did their side so our side looks a fucking state

Strip leaves off tomato plants

Order food/ booze etc

Christ I'm exhausted already...

What have I missed?

I really need to spring clean and sort out my cupboards of hell

Shoe cupboard, airing cupboard and my shove it all in Monica cupboard. Kitchen cupboards could do with a tidy up to.

Order massive shipment of Pombears

Bathroom done. Dishwasher on. Bins by front door (not dressed yet) Brew & fag now and quick MN while 1St wash spins

Oh for crying out loud. Here's me with a head full of 'buffet or BBQ..?' and half the house bleached to within an inch of its life and he's just announced that he's not overly keen on the idea of entertaining next weekend. He still hasn't invited his kids or his other bff (this whole 'let's do something bank holiday weekend' idea came about in conversation with his first bff in about June). I think I'm going to have a lie down.

notgrumpy well that's a downer. However I like a clean house (not that I have one you understand) but I hate the fact that the only time it's actually clean is when we have guests.

So take the bottle of wine you were chilling for someone else out of the fridge, have a glass or two and then glide around your house, and pretend you cleaned it for yourself to enjoy !?