Bitchy takes on the January Fledgling Thread. Buckle in and enjoy the ride...

[BitchyTakesOnManagement]

Ok. Welcome to the January Fledglings thread. Before we get started we have Some important notices

1. The fledglings are a long running thread, We are might seem clicky but that is what happens when some of us have been on the same thread for up to 5 years
2. We are rather partial to new blood Pull up a seat in the naughty corner
3. Don't assume you can march in and impose your way. We follow the fly lady way and we adapt it to suit our lives and needs. You are welcome to come join us for support and chat, don't assume you know best.
4. There is more to us than cleaning. If you want to be obsessive about cleaning you will find us and and our interpretation of fly lady frustrating. You might be happier else where.

Right, as harsh as it might seem, it is important to get that out of the way as we expect this January thread to be busier with newbies and there has been problems in the past.

So the fly lady system there are rules and we have adaptations.

1. NO perfectionism!!!
2. Something is better than nothing and sometimes good enough really is good enough.

3.This is not about the housework, it is about having more time to do fun stuff. Don't ever feel guilty about doing stuff with the kids over doing the housework. The kids are more important.

And the practical adaptations. We have discussed the Marie Kondo book and the approaches within on previous threads. We are all agree two things: the author does not have kids and that the principles are very good for decluttering and that they can be used to in conjunction with the fly lady system (Marie Kondo to get in control, and fly lady to stay in control). As for the fly lady system there are some of the babysteps and things that are advised that are either "huh, why?" or just don't fit in with the household. We advise a pinch of salt and discretion with a dash of reality thrown in. E.g. if you are a no shoes household then clearly the wearing shoes in the house part of babystep 2 is going to make you go This is where adaptations come in and if past threads are to be gone on this will be discussed and there are various takes on it as and when they arise.

Also for the over enthusiastic newbies to the fly lady site and system everything you need will be posted here in the form of links. There are 3 levels:
Newbie: babysteps - get into these habbit
student: Missions and babysteps once the habits are habit the missions are a piece of cake.
Expert: deep cleaning, missions and babysteps - forget this if you have clutter, seriously.
Oh and for the love of all sanity do not subscribe to the email alerts. Seriously. Just don't.

Jump on board, buckle in and lets kick the butt of January.
Bitchy special brew on the naughty corner bar, natch
do we warn the newbies about the special brew or let them find out for themselves?

Hello everyone!
Apologies for my absence!

Ta- da:
Had a baby! Baby Castle is one week old today! We are thrilled with our little daughter and happily muddling along. My mum, sister and sister-in-law have been here helping with housework and making tea for visitors. Am bf and it has been all-consuming. Will gradually catch up with the thread over the next few days and be flapping my wings again soon.

Wing flaps to everyone!

And castle wins the awards for best ta da list this week!

Congratulations!!!!!

I like the zone for the week, we've just blitzed the bedroom so just a bit of hot spot maintenance in there.

Did a soul boosting run this morning so that counts for today.

It was nice being able to have friends over spontaneously without worrying that the house is too much of a dump. They're the kind of friends with similar standards, but it was good not to have to reclaim the furniture to sit on. Although it transpires that Ds2 has distributed some tampons around the house from upstairs!

Congratulations!

Congratulations!! castle

Congratulations, Castle. What a fab Ta-Da!

Congratulations Castle, two thread babies in a week, that really is a wonderful start to the year!

Busy day here, DH has been ill and in bed all day. DS stayed at my parents house last night to avoid DD's party (both were in agreement about this but I think missed each other in the evening). So this morning, DH, DD and I had a lazy morning, reading in bed etc. The up and out shopping (Waitrose) for me and DD, then my DM brought DS back and we had a catch up chat. Spent the afternoon cooking for dinner and the freezer, DD to swimming lesson, eat dinner and get the DCs to bed. Spent the last couple of hours compiling all the figures for my tax return, just need to ping them into the computer now, which can wait another day or two.

Oh and supervised two lots of homework, two lots of spellings, one lot of thank you notes and one lot of keyboard practice. Really must go to bed now.

Morning all

Castle congratulations
To do
Morning routine
Reading, spellings and some homework.
Tesco deliver
Box up advent Lego
Tidy dc's and main bedroom
Clean bathroom

Hope everyone has a good morning
Back later

Morning Shan and All to come,

Thanks for the links over the week-end Whisper - great help here :).
Waves to Grey and Bitchy - like the upcycling project Grey :). Sorry to hear that your appointment has been delayed Bitchy, but glad you had a good break this week-end .

Congratulations Castle - that's wonderful news ! And welcome to Babycastle.

Read with interest that it's been difficult to get to bed at a reasonable time Mrs. Mook. I've decided I'm going to work on this myself this week. ;)

Glad the parties went well Who knows and Blue .With just three that shouldn't have been too much mess to clear up after Whoknows :).
Lovely to hear about little baby and you Engels - already 10 days old !
And Trazzles, I do wish you and your loved ones lots of positive vibes and cuddles. Your mum sounds lovely . Take care you too.
Swan, leeks and chorizo sounds delicious - shame I couldn't help you eat it. I'll have to give it a go . Is it complicated ?

Slowcommotion, sorry to hear about your FIL. Poor yous right now. But glad you got your mojo back on Friday. :)

You say I sound very organised Slowco - Wow , what a compliment ! ( blushes ) The decluttering part is coming on bit by bit. I am finding that part pretty complex though.

One of the things I'm finding intriguing about all this flying business is that by emphasizing cleaning zones, automatically stuff that gets in the way becomes visible to me as clutter. That doesn't mean it's sorted out. That means I'm taking little steps into sorting things out. I like the way you put that Bless - habits 'fluttering into life ' :).

I've been working on my negative voices over the week-end . I find it hard to accept that things which are part done are in a good state. I am learning to say positive things to myself. The main thing I hear myself saying is 'Babysteps'. ( No Engels - not talking about your little one - I'm talking about me :) )

'Babysteps' is also helping me with getting DH involved . If I need to accept myself at this stage, then how can I not accept that he is there too ?

When DH does a job I've asked him to do, I find him turning up explaining to me how and what he's done. To begin with I was quite snappy with him when he did that. But now I'm realising that he's also living through these babysteps. Since I realised that I've begun to make more encouraging noises like 'That's good :). ' 'Well done'. 'Great.' etc.

To be honest, it doesn't come easy to me. But, that's logical .(Babysteps there too :) )But, whilst I'm learning to praise myself , I'm also learning to praise him too ! :) - Enjoyed reading about you, your bump, your DH and the pendulum Doghair - sounds to be in the same vein :D

So today's todas :
Morning routine done + under bed done at the week-end ( thanks to links Whisper :) ) 15 minutes decluttering - minus negative voices and plus praising - rewarded by cuppa and a happy feeling .

Congratulations Castle!!!!!!!!!

Bitchy I need special brew. 3 (broken) hours sleep. It's killing me...

Oh Castle what utterly lovely news to wake up to on a Monday morning!!!! Many congratulations!!!! So happy for you and your dh and family!! and for later!! Good to hear that you have lots of family support but take it steady, look after yourself and nest a bit too!!!

Good morning lovely fledglings!! Hope everyone OK!

After a long period of inertia, my mo-jo is back by my side, clutching a duster, ready for action. Only trouble is, she requires regular feeding with chocolate croissants and jam sandwiches ... . In short, hoping to crack on today. A thousand and three things to do!!

Ta da yesterday:
rabbits
empty dw
iron white school shirts
buy small present, various bits of food, and lots of boxes of handkerchiefs
fold towels and other dry clothes
strip and made dd's bed (with two duvets because it is so cold!)
2 more loads laundry
carry hoover upstairs
carry ironing board etc upstairs
put away washing up done by hand
find details of party cupcake lady
hwk supervision (lots)
iron school pinafores, cardigans, dd pants and vests
write note to dd's teacher to go with "thank you" biscuits
note in dd's Agenda
note to school dinner lady supervisor (dd not that hungry)
photocopy dd med certificate and put in envelope for school sec
rabbits
early bed

To do:
great sock sort of 2015
dye Barnet Fair
think about supper and prep in morning while have energy (must start meal planning properly now festive period over) and think about diet!!!!!
yellow (cardboard) recycling
other rubbish
sort boudoir which is threatening to return to former wild state
final, final tiny bits in Christmas dec boxes (on second landing) and take up to roof (keep finding little things to go in them)
tidy up downstairs again which has suffered a bit over weekend but still fundamentallly ok so shouldn't take long, including dd's invalid "station" on sofa, ie fleeces, pillows and butler tray containing pills, hankies, books, sick bucket (thankfully unused!) etc
e-mail to db
parcel to db (containing things left behind when visiting)
finish other final post-Christmas communications
sort thank you letters
racing fixtures on calendar
party organisation x 3 (5ieme party, 6ieme party and confirmation supper)
banking in UK and here
fix optician appt
start on home office

Won't get all of above done today but will make a start.

Dh back in the country and DD has gone back to school (considerably better but not totally recovered). Fingers crossed she will be ok but have written note for them to call me immediately if she isn't (but someone has to have a leg hanging off before they will send them home). Doubt she is going to be fit for ballet tonight which is a worry because this will be the 4th consecutive lesson she will have missed, but better to recover properly imo.

Onward and upward everyone! Have a good start to the week fledglings!

Oh Bitchy so very sorry to hear about your cancelled appointment. You must be gutted . Hope your weekend away will have provided you with enough energy to badger them to arrange another one very quickly!

Ouch at three hrs sleep Trazzles I will be thinking of you this week. Hope everything works out ok and three cheers for your lovely ma! x

Saymwa good to hear the baby-steps are coming along well for you and your dh. The decluttering can be more difficult (it's usually taken a while to clutter somewhere up, so will take time to unclutter) but, like eating an elephant, small bites little and often is best. (Unless you decide to go for huge Kondo sort at beginning and then use Flylady to maintain of course, as some people have on here.) Keep going! The main thing to remember is thtat every small block of 15 mins makes a difference!

Sorry to hear your dh unwell Whoknows and hope he gets better soon. Your Sunday was hardly a day of rest so hope you can gather back some time for yourself mid-week!

Dogsbumhair glad the system is making a difference! Don't worry about zone work not fitting your house template exactly; just adapt system to suit yourself! Well done re: light fitting!

Greymalkin agree with you and Swan about clutter = stress & stroppiness!! Great you feel at home on the this thread! I am thoroughly addicted and couldn't get through the week without it!! Congrats on upcycling!

Agree Swan that 4th birthdays are definitely the most challenging! Also glad to be past that stage although being in expat situation seem to be organising more parties than ever: as dd has 'English' friends and 'school' friends (and previous attempts at mixing the two have not gone very well with one or two members of group bursting in to tears and saying they "don't understand") plus the school friends are divided in to two different year groups as they are merged on language basis). It's all v. complicated; partic when adding in ballet friends!!

Waves to Shannara Nicknacks MrsMook and eveyone else I have missed!

Have a good week everyone!

Arf at tampons MrsMook

And forgot to wave to Bless

Sorry if I've missed anyone else!

Right, now I've down my cuppa, must close the screen and leap in to action!

Tally-hooooo!!!!!

The irony of the tampons is that I haven't had need of them since the creation of DS2.

Right... time to set up my any do list.

Good call Trazzles one vat coming up. Help yourself.

To whoever say about rescheduling, it was a specialist service, the service has been withdrawn so it is cancelled and no alternative available. Hence why it totally gutted me, well that and the fact I had waited more than a year to be see already. :(

Ds is off school and we have fallen out. Everything technology is banned. And if he doesn't actually throw up he is in at lunch. As for me, the car is under nearly 2 inches of ice and I am running late. Not the best start to the week. But onwards and upwards right?

Oh no, Bitchy how totally unfair.

Am feeling a bit knocked for 6 this morning by the news that one of our uni friends died over the weekend, so plunging into work to avoid thinking about it too much. The house is still full of DS1's birthday wreckage, but I can't face dealing with it just now.

Oh no Blue, sorry to hear that, what a shock. A similar thing happened to us a few years ago and it was very hard to focus on anything else for quite a while.

Bitchy - sorry to hear about your appt too, no wonder you are feeling gutted.

Congratulations, Castle!

So sorry to hear about your friend Blue; it must have come as an awful shock.

How frustrating about the appointment, Bitchy.

Not feeling very motivated this morning (I think my mojo must have flown over to you, SC), so despite the fact that I've already had 2.5 hours to myself, my ta-da list is not particularly impressive:

Took DS to school
Dropped friend (who came to visit this weekend) at station and DD1 at theatre
Folded washing
Put on another load of washing
Decluttered more paperwork (but got distracted by stationery, of which I also have far too much)

Time for now; I'm hoping it will provide me with some much-needed momentum...

Wow, busy weekends all round....I assume that Hermione Granger's time turner is something that is passed around between group members judging by the number of things that some people have achieved this weekend, SC's list nearly made my head explode. I look forward to borrowing that at some stage (hopeful newbie pleading look in eyes).

Congratulations Castle

Sorry to hear about your news Bitchy I can't believe that a medical service can be cancelled without any replacement after a years wait, that is really shocking.

Saymwa glad you enjoyed the pendulum saga! Interesting what you said about your DH talking through jobs, etc. I think learning to accept how differently my DP approaches things to me has been my biggest learning in our relationship and has helped me let go of a lot of the frustration that I used to feel about the fact that he didn't do things my way!! How unreasonable of him!! Having said that I did still want to kill him about 5 times yesterday during the pendulum saga! I think part of the problem was that he was so far out of his comfort zone that it stressed him out to the max, bless him.

BTW I can't work out whether Special Brew is strong tea or coffee or hard liquor, can anyone enlighten me?

Also totally random request. My goddaughter is 10 on Friday and I want to buy her a present. She lives in Scotland so I need to buy something that I can post as I'm not there for her birthday this year. Does anyone have a ten year old DD or niece, etc and know what she might like. I often buy clothes simply because I figure I've got a better chance of picking something that she might like as I don't have a clue what a ten year would like in terms of a toy or game. However, I'm open to suggestions. What is 'cool' for a ten year old girl at the moment? I bought her a winter coat for Xmas so a coat isn't an option. Any ideas?

P.S. While I'm out buying a birthday present I thought I would also try and pick up a kitchen timer that could double as my Flylady timer, has anyone found one that is particularly good for the job?

Thanks for the chuckle over the tampons Mrs Mook very embarrassing!

Coffee break! It's freezing (and snowing a bit!)

Dogsbumhair thanks but don't be too impressed by my lists!! I've listed every tiny thing plus, despite being on this thread for approx 5 yrs, I am notoriously "all or nothing" -still trying to improve on that - ie produced very few lists last week! Plus I only have one child and only work between 9 and 18 hrs a week atm so have loads more time than many on here..So I am not a good example to follow

"Special brew" is Bitchy's extra extra extra strong strong coffee concoction (no doubt with added secret ingreds!) available from naughty corner bar when people are particularly in need of caffeine/energy shot!

My dd is 11 yrs but, as I recall, in addition to a stack of English bks (difficult to get over here) her favourite 10th birthday presents were: a spotty oilcloth messenger type bag , an Ice watch and some temporary nail tattoos. Also, depends on child, but if your niece is interested in crafts, then around about now is a great time to get them sewing and knitting (sufficiently good hand to eye coordination at this age, plus patience to sit still for a while!). I buy kits from here and they have gone down well with dd and her friends.

Loom bands are another obvious present (perhaps a bit too obvious!) but dd can't seem to get enough of all the unusual glittery/luminous/multi-coloured varieties on offer! Other favourites are "comfort" items such as fleeces, cushions, pillows for her room. Some lovely things on Not on the high street. But, think you have it right because you can't go wrong with clothes!! Zara & H & M are the "go to" shops for 10 & 11 yr olds over here - don't know if the same in UK but assume so!! Good luck!