Fledglings don't makes resolutions in January, they fly through the babysteps.

[BitchytheGreat]

So here it is the dreaded January thread. The thread of resolutions and good intentions for the year that you are lucky if you see through to the end. Welcome to the start of 2014!!

A quick note for newbies, this is a long running thread. We do like new blood around here. However, we do ask you to be respectful that for a lot of us just getting off our arses is not going to help and to avoid suggesting this. We all know life is more complicated then this. So here we do things a little differently. A little bit of flying and a lot of chatter and moral support. Feel free to jump on board and join us in flying.

For those who are new to fly lady she recommends a three step program:

1. Get those babysteps into a habbit
2. Get rid of the clutter.
3. Get that deep cleaning done.

Don't worry if you think you not doing it right but not getting up to it. Some of us have been here for years and we are still decluttering. Because clutter has a nasty way of multiplying if you take you eye off it, especailly if you have kids.

Fly lady ethos tells us a few things that I want you to remember:
No perfectism this is harder then you would imagine
You are never behind just start where you are and anything you do is progress.
It didn't get into a mess overnight, it won't get tidy over night accept it will take time to get on top of things and you will be happier.

So jump on board and lets get started.

Oh and I forgot the proper introductions. "I'm Bitchy and I shall be your guide to the fly lady system for January" better buckle up as things normally get a little crazy when it is my turn to take control. good luck

Bah humbug. Have avoided thread for several days for failing to do Tuesday's ta das which I still haven't done (though did do dishes last night which is usually DH's job but he was ill).

Going to bed now and hoping to be more motivated tomorrow after a lovely sleep. I might even post the Christmas presents that are still in my living room .

This CBA must be catching, nothing done but the bare minimum for the last 3 days. Though plenty of running this week, you never know I might be ready for my half marathon in 6 weeks time .

Belated Birthday Wishes to Toffee .

Blue that sounds like a stressful day for you, albeit a joyful one! Birthday cakes make me soo unravelled! Although they exert a strange compulsion and I always end up making one. Good luck with the party. Well done for working as well as organising everything.

done
load of washing hung out
washing put away
kitchen tidied after supper
supper cooked
children put to bed (sort of...very late and slack mother)
tidied ds1's room and made him make his bed up with a new sheet
another load of washing on
found catechism handbook...looked at introductory session..looks impossible to convey to 7 year olds...but it is just an hour

Children in a moderately good mood. Ds1 ran more cross country in hope of being selected for D of E, but he said he had to cheat to finish it They also have to bring in an Airfix model with evidence that it is their own work (photos of them gluing it in stages) Not ds's area of expertise He is showing an interest though, because of D of E.
Dd is being thoroughly flouncy and nail varnishy this evening, ds2 has been glued (sorry pun) to Dr Who episodes. He tried to have a scene over mashed potato (lumpiness thereof) but I just handed him a bowl of it, put the telly on, and it was consumed...

Dh is still in bed with flu; he'll survive!

Just back from very lovely evening with friends. There was and .

Thank you for the birthday wishes, Whispers and Merry.

House is a tip. Dirty cups and plates seem to have sprouted in several rooms . Will tackle it tomorrow. Am so relieved it's not a school day.

I would never get either of my DC to eat mashed potato, Swan - all credit to you!

Just stopping by real fast as i know I am going to fail the babystep tonight.

No missions because it is the weekend

Have fun with the kids!!!!!

Babystep read the 11 commandments.

Right gotta go sort out everything that needs sorting for tomo. night.

Good morning. Starting bright and early here today and finishing late. Looking forward to seeing my bed after having much fun in the middle. Going to be good... tiring but good.

Hope you all have good days when you finally wake up. Time to go. Ciao.

Woah, Bitchy, you must be knackered! Hope you have a good day, whatever it is you are doing :)

Today I am going to get the house back in order

I have actually managed to do quite a bit of zone cleaning done this week, just the bathroom floor and sink to clean and a bit of sorting out in DS's room. It's just the rest of the house which has suffered :(

Yay, it's the weekend. Hope to get a bit done today, rather than laze around all day. admittedly I am still in bed drinking a coffee.

to do

Have shower and dress
Put wash on
Tidy and clean kitchen
Quick tidy in living room
Wipe down surfaces in toilet and bathroom
Quick hoover
Make cake
Make bread (not sure what recipe though. Maybe a simple bloomer would be nice with bacon tomorrow)
Put awAy clean laundry

Zone cleaning has slipped onto the back burner for the moment. I might switch to the weekly zone system for a bit, see if that works.

My 7 yo "Mummy, can I have the respect of god for breakfast".
I was baffled until I realised he was asking for Hot Cross Buns .

To do
Operation mass homework
15 minutes rescue my bedroom
Morning routine

Blimey, Merry, that's a bit profound for a Saturday morning!

Well done on the zone cleaning, Whispers. Hope you can get your house in order today.

:o at respect of God

Haven't managed to get my arse off the sofa yet Have told the DC that the tv is going off after this programme, so we should see some movement then

Good luck with that, Whispers .

I have made pancakes, loaded the d/w and been distracted by MN .

Toffee

I was true to my word, got everyone up and dressed. Finished the bathroom, put DD down for a nap and started clearing out some books we've got to make room for some from DS's room so he can have space for toys on his shelves. Then DH took DS to the supermarket, so I've flopped on the sofa again, so I can enjoy the peace and quiet Will resume once DD is up again, which should be soon.

Am still sitting here in my dressing gown, Whispers . At least you have done things.

at MiniMerry, never heard them called that before!

Just DD & I at home today so a fairly chilled day, am trying to finish a scarf to go with her hat, it will have pockets with paw prints on (as my glove pattern is too big for her)

Done
Beds
Laundry
Windows
Cat litter tray
Rubbish out
Lunch
Dd investigating my jewellery box, I can believe how many single earrings I have.

To do
Washing up
Finish scarf

I am in bed, firmly. Pushed myself through everything yesterday to get prescription and restock food, got halfway through felt very odd and found myself on the floor looking at paramedics through one eye! Left eyelid totally dropped and no feeling in hands or the foot that I normally can feel. Lost the day to a+e only to find problems diminishing but eye absolutely streaming and screaming again, and lost most of the shopping budget to getting back to my car.

Toffee, I refer to friend as that because that's who she used to be, and on some levels still is, but not always in her behavior. tbh she's now fluctuates between person I try to support and often miss my friendship with, and friend, but she didn't ask to end up up with raging MH issues, so I'm a bit conflicted.

I had to call her from the car yesterday (hands free) on my way back from hospital because I was so behind, and warned her I was driving and ill, but she just wanted to first get stressed about me not having a diary to reset up a date to meet for the second call running (we don't need to there are other ways of sorting what she needs) after she made the last date over complicated and I said it was madness, and then wanted to know if I'd been fed while at hospital and argue about how 'unhelpful they were' (her anti NHS agenda) to not have fed me, rather than take on board that I was really fragile right now and just didn't want her to feel abandoned and spiral into self destructive thoughts. (which is what happens if I don't call)

Problem is that all though I'm fed up with some of her behaviour and pretty meh about her reactions to my situation I know it's her anxiety and BPD affecting how she responds. Ultimately she will have to change or I will withdraw, because the fact I'm being this disloyal is a sign of how much I'm struggling with it, but her circumstances mean it would be utterly crap of me to right now.

Afternoon all!

Dh's friends passed through town early and popped in last night and again this morning/lunch. I don't think I have ever felt more unprepared and ashamed of my messy,grubby, cluttery, cobwebby, crumbling home or more ill at ease. (Still hadn't completely finished putting Christmas decs away for one thing - still teetering piles of books/cardboard boxes/presents stacked in corners!)

They were of course showing us photos of their sleek conversion that they had just finished renovating! (Had to be didn't it!) The tactless female half of the couple said brightly "ah well, coming here always makes me feels much better about everything we have to do back home!!''" [I tried a fair assimilation of a rictus grin in response but inside felt hugely embarrassed.] It is not the first time I have had people say similar.

Added to the humiliation - dh made some comment about me being a bit of a "bigger girl" since when we all last met - very unlike him (which made it hit home all the more somehow) - and rather demoralising.

Do you think people actually think I am completely unaware of the state of my house and my lumpy body and need to be constantly reminded??? [Harrumph]

Anyway, thank heavens [inhospitable old harridan emoticon] they have now moved on to their next victims lot of friends and in a fit of pique for revenge's sake I immediately "suggested" that dh went on a quick trip to Ikea to buy a desk with shelving attached so at least dd has a permanent home for files/dictionaries/a permanent place to study on the ground floor. It is going to look pretty hideous - yet another 'temporary' mismatched quick-fix -but right now temporary is better than nowt.

Added to the above, (following in Silly's footsteps) I think I may have broken my little toe! [Serves me right for taking my lace-up shoes off!! Clouted it on the side of a plywood wine box and then saw stars and felt sick and wibbly. It is swelling fast but I absolutley refuse to go to a & e this weekend so am hobbling about on it tentatively now.

Bit of a bummer because I am meant to be getting my Barnet Fair cut this eve and don't know if I can get my shoe on.

Heigh ho sorry for usual tales of trivial-- woe!!! Compared to what is on the news atm I should be positively ashamed of myself for complaining and counting my many blessings!

Hope you have a good one Bitchy!

Slightly 'besieged' wing flaps to one and all!

Hope you enjoy yoru weekends everyone!

x posts!

Oh no ¨Just I've just posted all that and now feel utterly ashamed for complaining about such trivialities after reading everything you are currently having to endure.

I'm so sorry to hear that you collapsed and had to go to A&E. Are you sure that you should have been discharged??? I hope they gave you a thorough going over!! Also hope you are feeling a bit better and good to know you are staying firmly in bed.

How you can still find the time/energy to worry about your friend is completely amazing too!!

[Btw, Just meant to add, I have family members who have suffered from severe anxiety (one was a much-loved aunt who ultimately had to be hospitalised) and have had two periods of suffering from it myself and it does make one behave in a completely horrible, irrational and selfish way [classic fight/flight response]. It can be very very wearing for everyone around about so really admire you for continuing to be so understanding of her.]

PS Is there anyone else around who can shop for you atm?

Just sorry to hear about your hospital trip. Look after yourself (I hope you're still in bed!).

Sc how tactless of dh's friends and dh. I would lamp dh if he made a comment like that, especially in public! My dh had the audacity to criticise my eating and drinks habits lately (have been having a lot of eggs for brekkie as fills me up properly and have been drinking a bottle of wine at the weekend, which is unusual for us).....cheeky arse! I'm not the one whose BMI is in the obses range AND I exercise AND he eats more shit than me!

Ta da
wash
ironing to doctor who
washing up
long skype with dm
hooevered downstairs
cleaned downstairs loo,
cleaned coffee table
dusted lounge

all this because dmil is babysitting tonight and her house is spotless! We are going out to dinner then on to a birthday party.

And 8ne final ta da(dh not me!)...the shelves in the cellar are up! Now I need to clean up then we can start using it properly! Need to get some more clear storage boxes. I said to DH that this will change our lives and I wasn't joking. It will be perfect for all the bits that we don't use on a weekly basis...summer toys, dinner service from his dgps, wine rack, christmas decorations. So many things that are going to live there, which frees up space elsewhere.

have a good evening everyone

SC I refused to stay in hospital as there's no one to take over and frankly another unplanned hospital stay would totally destroy any ability I fantisize about still having, to sort out our lives. Please don't say or feel like that, it's exactly the mistake I make and then fail to acknowledge my needs, because someone else has something awful happening!
The toe sounds miserable, (will have to reread Silly, have missed that) having a tendancy to the same, the standard answer is a piece of cotton wool between it and next and strap them together.

I think most people just don't realise how it makes the other person feel when they say insensitive things, well that's what I try and tell myself, (though yesterdays chap telling me my wheelchair was a sign of me failing to accept the Lords healing, may have had some idea after my reply!)

I do love the 'revenge' storage solution to the insensitivity, and thank you for confirming that the best people can behave horribly at times through fight/fight type problems because I know it in my heart, but sometimes my head and heart aren't in sync.

done
catechism class
stirfry
Grendel diary empathy with Grendel encouraged
rubbish out
wash in
washing dried
made a small cake!

everyone is in a bad mood but two children have been to shops (exercise/independence)
and ds1 practised his scales
ds2 homework x 2
ds2 to football (major meltdowns before, during and after - but he insisted he loves it...)

just - hope you feel better soon.
sans - I would be seriously pissed off with dh and he would have a lot of making up to do.

Just - oh, you poor thing. I'm so sorry you ended up in A&E - and also that you had to discharge yourself because of your responsibilities at home . My jaw dropped at your mention of the man who told you your wheelchair was a sign of you not accepting the lord's healing. I wish I could have heard your reply .

Your explanation about your friend's condition does make it more understandable that you put up with so much from her. Frankly, she is very, very lucky to have a friend as understanding and loyal as you. I think you need to be careful, though, as you need to take care of yourself too. That is essential because you have your own caring responsibilities at home.

SC - ow, broken toe sounds very painful. DS1 has had broken toes and fingers and the hospital did just what Just said. As for the irritating visitors - I am so angry with them on your behalf. They sound so smug. You work really hard running your house, working and looking after DD - I bet they couldn't cope with half of it.

As for your DH's silly comment - maybe I can cheer you up by telling you about what my DH said at the end of a friend's birthday party. He had been having a long chat with a group of people and then I joined them. Somebody had just mentioned something about boiler repairs (must have been a great party ) and DH said, "Ah, speaking of old boilers, here's my wife!" The look of horror on the other guests' faces was a sight to behold. It is the sort of joke DH would make at home with me, but in public it just sounded terribly rude and he was mortified. What troubled me afterwards was that nobody would have felt it was rude if I was obviously young and beautiful .

Engels - well done on the tidy house. Enjoy your night out!

Swan - congrats on getting through another family day .

Goth - a chilled day sounds good.

Finally managed to haul myself off the sofa, so I have a list.

Ta da

Load of washing on
Bath and hair done
Swish and swipe in bathroom
Changed towel
Lunch - DS1 and me
Unloaded d/w
Reloaded d/w and washed up extra by hand
Wiped kitchen counters
Emptied and cleaned lunchbox
Thank yous done and posted (phew)
Phoned credit card company
Put wet clothes in tumbledryer and on radiator
Phoned MIL to invite for sunday lunch tomorrow
Lunch for DS2 and DH on their return home from short trip out
Cleared and wiped down the desk in DS1's room ready for my OU work
Wiped down DS1's mucky bannisters and walls
Walked into town to exchange unwanted gift
Back home, made tea for DH, who was tired out after his trip (he thought he was ok, but found driving into town and taking DS1 to spend his book tokens completely exhausting)

Am relieved I have managed to get some things done that I have been putting off for ages, eg the cards and the credit card. It's silly because it's more stressful not doing these things than actually getting on and doing them.

DS2 has been reading his new books ever since he came home at lunchtime. We haven't heard a peep out of him, although he has just joined me at the table (still reading his book).

Going to do a bit of paperwork now, then make a late dinner.