Flinging our way through the chaos: February’s Fledgling Flyers

[LinzerTorte]

Welcome to the February edition of the Fledgling Flyers' thread.

If you're living in CHAOS (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome), this is the thread for you! We follow the tips on the FlyLady website in an attempt to restore order to our homes, but advise against signing up for the e-mails; all the information you need is on this thread.

Each day, I'll be posting the links that will enable you to do any of the following:

• start or repeat babysteps

• repeat babysteps and do 15 minutes a day decluttering in the current zone

or

• reinforce babysteps and do daily missions if you have finished decluttering.

More information about the babysteps is here.

So please join us - there's always plenty of chat, , cake, encouragement and the occasional to help us on our way!

swan pesky kids! I'll never understand em. DD is clearly afraid of the dark (and spiders) so I have sympathised and comforted. Unfortunately her anxiety just seems to have got steadily worse so I am now in her bed from about 11pm until morning . DS made me realise how I am probably not really helping her face her fears when he said 'I'm afraid of the dark too I just hug my blanket round me and close my eyes' . So the plan is me in the room but not in the bed with privilage withdrawal for non cooperation. Not that she seems at all bothered about todays comp ban .

Evening all!!

So so busy this week (half term) so quick list dump and them o must go have a bath- I'm so achey.

Tomorrow

Morning routine
Toddler group
Visit friend for lunch? Need to confirm
Declutter hall
Finish shredding
Re boot laundry
Hoover stairs
Bring bins in
Wash our bedclothes
Tidy our room

scatty I do sympathise with your dd, being very frightened of dark as a child but I always shared a room with my sister so I suppose that helped. I've noticed that dd has still lots of attachment objects (blanket, cat, various soft toys) that protect her from her fears, but she is definitely needy. I suppose in the end it is a kind of CBT where you reassure them that they can manage by themselves, but I think you are right in thnkng that you can't just say to someone "don't be needy" - more, would you like to think of things in this way instead?
Must try it myself on myself Relying far too much of dh and his mobile for moral support throughout the day and I think it is driving him nuts

All calm, cooked homemade mushroom quiche with homemade pastry, reheated the couscous for kids, salad
ds cheered up seeing two teenage girls for five mins
boys now watching football and chatting non-stop
dd being read bedtime story
kitchen tidied, and threw some more rubbish out, hotspotted etc.

I feel soo soo tired though, thnk I will crawl into bed now when boys are settled.

Evening all,

Well, DH didn't do much on the to do list (in fact all he did was ferry the DCs to and from their activity clubs and do the washing up that he neglected to do last night. He did have a lot of paid work to do though. He says.

Anyway, the DCs got back before tea and were tired out, so they had a bit of quiet time on the DS and Ipad, DH and DS played football in the garden then tea, then a bit of telly, and they have been playing very nicely for the last hour or so, although I would quite like them to go to bed now. Although we don't have problems with bedtime as such, they do go a bit later than I would ideally like.

Scatty - how old is DD? We realised DS was scared of the dark when he was about 18 months, he has been sleeping with his light on low on a dimmer switch ever since (he's 8 now). About a year ago he and DD (6) decided to move into a room together (they used to have to go in together whenever we had guests and on holidays and they decided to make it permanent). Which is fine for now, but there will come a time when DD wants her room back to herself and DS turns into a quivering wreck if we ever so much as mention it as a possibility, also we turfed DD out of the room and into DS's old room once for bad behaviour and DS was so upset. I think we will have a major trauma on our hands with this at some point.

MummyNic -no, you are not being silly. We don't have any pets now but I remember being devastated at the death of my goldfish once, they really are part of the family.

Swan - that was a lovely "look on the bright side" post you made about the washing on the line and the hellebores. Not much point putting washing out here for another few weeks, our garden just doesn't get any sunshine at this time of year and is quite sheltered.

Ta-da!
One load of washing.

To do.
CBA.

Heads for naughty corner, anyone? There's always tomorrow for Flying.

Back from a lovely visit to my Mum's. Have had visits from DC's friends all day today, so no time to browse MN, sadly, but have used my time wisely by sticking to the daily Flylady routines and sorting my laundry . Mum gave me her copy of the Flylady book (mine is lost in clutter ) because she didn't need it (naturally tidy, unlike her daughter). It has been very useful to read through the routines, etc.

Lauren - sorry you are having such a difficult time . I'm sure an Ofsted visit is the last thing you need, but it might be good to keep busy right now.

Mummy - it's very natural that you are missing your dog. As eveyone said, a dog is a (very loved) member of your family. DH and I still talk about our childhood family dogs - 25 years on!

Linzer - you are doing a fantastic job, running this thread in addition to teaching/looking after your children/ running a house, etc (hands over).

It's interesting how 'playdates' absorb your precious time when children are under 5, but seem to give you time with older children. Because both DC were busy playing with their friends today, I was freed to get on with household stuff. If the children had been younger, I would have spent my time supervising Playdough or making cakes. As it was, I could leave them all to their own devices whilst I busied myself with unpacking, sorting laundry and washing up. Result!

That is true for DD and her playdates Toffee alas not for DS, I have to helicopter the whole time otherwise he ignores them or tries to get them to do stuff they don't want to do and it is a stressful experience in general for me. Glad you had a nice time at your mum's.

Thank you lovely ladies
I'm feeling really low but I think half of it is due to "special lady's week" arriving today
I always get a little irrational around this time of the month, I should be able to cope again in a few days. For now I shall just have to accept I'm going to burst into tears every time I look in the hall, bedroom and kitchen

On a positive note: I'm still baby stepping
On an even more positive note: had the best day ever at work can't tell you exactly but I had just 1 day to do a report for the head of our department which will end up being discussed with ministers
Rather enjoyed the pressure

Thank you for the Toffee, much appreciated! I can allow myself to indulge now that I've finished work and tomorrow's school English lesson, which have both meant another late (for me) night. Normally I'd have been able to get them both done tomorrow morning, but I'm taking DS to the primary school open day so won't have time. He's just as excited about coming to DD2's English lesson as anything else (DD1's has been cancelled as she's out of school an hour early since the RE teacher is ill). He used to come with me three years ago before he started kindergarten, but I don't think he remembers.

WhoKnows I also find DS's playdates quite stressful, even though he's over 5, as general boisterousness and tears are fairly common. DD1 often used to ignore friends when she had them over; she only really plays with our neighbour now, but thankfully they get on very well.

Was talking to DH about DD1 earlier and about how she never talks about how she's feeling or what she thinks about things. She can chat away nineteen to the dozen when the mood takes her, but seems to be lacking... I'm not sure what. When we had her assessed, the child psychologist said that she's about a year behind her peers emotionally - but maybe I'm just reading too much into things because of her problems at school. OTOH I keep thinking that there must be more to it than "just" dyslexia; it's hard to pinpoint exactly what it is though.

Apologies for slight hijack - will get back to the matter in hand now and post the links!

Sorry, WhoKnows, I realise my generalisations about playdates don't apply to everyone. Actually, playdates were a nightmare with DS1 until he was quite a bit older, now I think about it. It is a different story with DS2 and I can actually leave him to play with a friend. DS1 used to wreck his room/ get overexcited/upset his friend, etc. In fact, I stopped all playdates for over a year, so I really do understand. I think that's why I appreciate the easiness of playdates these days.

Glad you liked the , Linzer - you deserve it!

Mummy - your day at work sounds very exciting!

Sorry to hear you're feeling low, MummyNic - quite understandable, though. But good news about work; it sounds intriguing.

**

Thursday's links

Today's babystep can safely be ignored, as you should have unsubscribed from the e-mails.

The mission is to make a list of bathroom supplies that you're running low on (and possibly a master list too) and also to finish clearing your desk.

Here are your reminders for Thursday, which is also errand day.

It was, and exactly what I needed to distract me. I'm bracing myself for "and how did you come up with this figure" phone calls tomorrow as there's a meeting somewhere soon about the thing I've reported on.
God how vague can you be?!!! Lol.

I'm secretly rather proud though

Hi all, just a quick update. Thanks for your well wishes. Despite a day spent in bed, I actually felt worse by the end of the day so saw out of hours GP. I have bronchitis . He has prescribed penicillin and some ventolin as I just can't seem to get my breath. I was a bit nervous of the ventolin - have never taken it before, but OMG what a difference! I could actually take proper breaths, and my coughing has plummeted.

DS1 got upset at the thought of spending the night at his 'aunty's house' so DH picked them up at the end of the day. She has offered to look after them again tomorrow so I will drop them off in the morning and hopefully with the medication and a bit more rest I will be on the mend!

Hope you feel better soon ChitChat. It's always good to get some medication that actually work.

I'm intrigued Mummy Nick by your day at work. Sympathies, I also got to that time of the month yesterday. I'm always taken slightly by surprise, and then it always explains why I've felt so run down, grumpy, been an absolute bitch, emotional, tired, etc.

Scatty DD (3) is also afraid of the dark, but then so was I as a child/teenager. I only really grew out of it, because I decided privacy was more important than having the landing light shine into my room. I'm trying not to pass on my fear of spiders to DD though .

Still no decluttering today, but keeping up with established routines, and had some useful discussion with DH about what we want from moving abroad (although still no concrete decisions). Also feeling much better about my relationship with DD as I'm working really hard at staying calmer, and not losing it. Have started reading "When kids press your buttons", not got very far, but I think there's something I can use in it.

RL swamping me somewhat at the moment, so may not post again for a few days. Good night everyone.

morning all, well my first experience of falling off the flying wagon, haven't done anything since the weekend, although have made beds and kept kitchen tidy. I've even got a load of sheets in the WM that are still wet and there since yesterday morning, shock horror.

I'll bbl to read through what I've missed. Urgent things for me today are
Library book return
Write a reference
Pick up prescription for dd
Phone nursery accountant re overdue letters when I'm in credit
Petrol in car

Hope everyone has been getting on better than me!

Morning! Once again I'm sorry for not getting back last night I'll definitely be on tonight though as I don't have visitors, I've read the thread but will just post a list before mindees come

DD and mindee to museum (different to Tuesday) and big park next to it
Wash up and shine sink done
Hoover
Hoover and tidy conservatory ready for people coming later to collect sofas
Supervise sofa collection
Put together flat pack storage and sort toys
Move bookcase into conservatory and create cozy corner
Pick up dog poo
Clean bathroom- deep clean
Paperwork
Zumba

That'll do!! Be back later for personals!!

well DH is on his second tip run this morning. All the 'stuff' from recarpeting and decorating is gone and a zillion bags of clutter that is only fit for the tip.

ALL GONE!

DW on, Beds made, swish and swipe done. Waiting for gas man to come with new parts for boiler so not washing floors until he has been and gone.

Got dogs to walk and a shower to have - see boiler issue above.

My ironing lady is having a break as her Mum died a couple of weeks ago, only found out yesterday, so there is a mountain of DH shirts and DC school 'stuff' to get ironed. So I either tackle that or find someone else to.

Have a good Thursday everyone.

Hi everyone

I didn't manage to get back on last night either - last minute evening at the cinema with some friends.

Flying - 0 out of 10
Eating crap - 10 out of 10

Must do better....

Morning, not doing so great here either, DS is super clingy this morning so I have done the bare minimum. However I have gone round and opened all the Windows as a lovely sunny day here, so hopefully it will air the house a bit, even if it is still a mess!

Super busy here, but have managed to do my morning routine in spite of it

Ta da list:

Wash, dress, hair (BBH - Linzer, am still loving it), makeup
Swish and swipe in bathroom (and noticed cobwebs above, so need to do Monday's mission )
B/Fast
DC - dress
Empty and reload d/w
Washing machine on
Kitchen hotspot
Make beds
Cover sofas with sheets in preparation for chimney sweep
Text friends re playdates
Put recycling out
Empty kitchen bin
Make tea for chimney sweep

To do:

Visit from MIL any minute
Lunch
Put yesterday's laundry away
Tumbledry clothes
Visit friend round the corner so our boys can play and we can catch up
Back in time for visit from a classmate of DS2 who is visiting for the afternoon
What's for dinner? Absolutely no idea
Online supermarket order
Missions
Declutter our bedroom if boys are amusing themselves and don't need adult intervention
Dinner of some description
Before-bed routine

Bed at decent hour

Have a good day everyone.

Hi all. Dh has taken Dc to the beach so i have chance to pop in here .

Struggling to remember who has said what but:

DDs fear of the dark DD is nearly 7 and has never really slept alone! She had to wear splints at night to correct a club foot until she was 2, they came off if she kicked alot so I slept with her to keep her calm (she now has lovely straight feet ). Since then I have just got in her bed if she woke in the night, it used to be about 3-4 nights/week. Unfortunately last month DS (8) moved into his own room and since then dd has had me in her bed all night every night. I am knackered, DD is not learning to manage her fears and dh is not happy . So action has been taken. Last night dd woke me up at 12 but agreed for me to sleep in spare bed in her room rather than in her bed, we both slept well after that .

playdates We too have hit a sticky patch re playdates. DS has new friends who's parents I don't know so difficult to arrange. DD gets very frustrated when she has a friend over as they usually want to play with DS (he shows off to them) and DD gets mad!! We are having a playdate break this half term .

Done:
DC to dentist
bought food (again)
made brownies with dc

To do:
laundry
dig the garden

done
left one kid behind playing football with teenage babysitter
and took just two dcs to museum! success at getting out of house guaranteed!
so we went to Science Museum and V & A, and bought dcs a chemistry set as well

a very strange thing happened whilst ds2 was in park with babysitter; one of Ds2 casual acquaintances from school and primary invited himself back to play with ds2! Never having met babysitter before, she thought he must be an old friend whereas he had never been in our house before. Ds1 seemed pleased to hear about this, so I told him (over babysitter's mobile) to come back at 3pm. Not sure if he will. In the meantime he left mud all over the house because of course teenage babysitter didn't tell visitor to take his football shoes off aaargh!!!! What a very strange playdate, in absence of both hosts

Ds2 is now projecting moon pics from cheapie torch onto the wall. Don't think I can face the chemistry set at moment. Just relieved to have done my duty for the day at getting everyone out of house, and can now collapse under influence of codeine.

Toffee how exciting - your stove!
Whoknows several people from school don't have luxury of extra bedrooms for their kids, and they all sleep happily in one room. My cousin said her children now refuse to sleep in separate rooms 2 boys and one girl all in combination of bunks and toddler bed in one room. Ditto another friend but daughter is 10 and sleeps in room with brothers age 8 and 5, all happy enough. Maybe it is a modern myth that we need our own rooms. I know my two would be sleeping in the same room if ONLY ds2 wasn't so manic; he certainly misses being in ds1's room and still tries to go into his room on every occasion.

Nicknacks oh no...hope the pencillin kicks in soon and your Dh can help. Kind godmother

Mummynic yes, I felt like that yesterday - the tears were enough to form a small lake I felt like Alice.

I feel calm.

However I am completely surrounded by mess!
half finished volcano
scone mixture
laundry (clean)
dw whichneeds emptying and reloading
bits of Ikea kitchen
remains of dd's tuna sandwich making
miscellaneous mess

no supper in sight, however I have
done
scones (which should tide them over till football match food)
tuna sandwich supper dd
Ds1 geography homework despite resistance
Ds1 sent for walk to local park when he started arguing with me
Ds2 in excellent mood, fashion parade
dd defused
plumber called
builder called
surveyor called
veg box order altered (cancelled swedes/parsnips/cabbage/butternut/beetroot) we are just having carrots potatoes, broccoli and tomatoes for next few weeks as there is bad backlog
boys watching football match and chatting happily
everyone has had exercise

2 washes done

So
better get cracking and clear decks
mud sweep
sink
dw
laundry upstairs
more pills
milkbottles out
veg box fold up and put outside
empty food compost
empty recycling

My two share a room (18m and 4yrs) and will have to for some time. I just wish it was a bigger room!

I have a relatively clean and tidy kitchen, need to empty the dishy when it finishes and put the dinner plates in it and shine the sink or shink as I have shortened it :o

Just need to get the kids to bed, then will do some more laundry (fun!) and sort through a load of outgrown clothes and passed down clothes.

Hiya all! I'm back as promised ! I've had a lovely day today with DD and mindees playing in the park and a visit to a FANTASTIC child friendly museum!

Todays lists:
DD and mindee to museum (different to Tuesday) and big park next to it done
Wash up and shine sink done
Hoover done
Hoover and tidy conservatory ready for people coming later to collect sofas done (I also washed all the plastics and inside of windows, walls and window sills)
Supervise sofa collection done
Put together flat pack storage and sort toys - after emmerdale paperwork
Move bookcase into conservatory and create cozy corner
Pick up dog poo done
Clean bathroom- deep clean
Paperwork - doing next
Zumba- doesn't look like it will happen today

I have also ordered a child's table and chairs set for the new playroom

Congratulations on all of the decluttering jax I bet you feel like there's loads more space now!

And at your huge list toffee! It spurred me on to do more here though!

scatty and swan I also long for the day when playdates mean spare time! They currently just feel like work what with me childminding!

swan how very odd about your ds friend inviting himself round! and on your behalf at the muddy football boots - I hope you managed to get through some more of your list whilst still remaining calm!

Right I'm logging off here and going to do some invoicing and planning and get ready for holiday mindees last day tomorrow I've really enjoyed having older children to plan for rather than 1 year olds, I find 9 year olds much easier to entertain and plan for!

BB tomorrow with a list I'm sure!