Do you agree with me about young boys in our society?

[Elf]

I've just quickly read something that Fillyjonk said about her son needing daily walking and it reminded me of something I meant to put up for discussion here.

IMO, our young boys (boys in particular I think), get a bit of a raw deal in our society. It seems that many people agree that many of them are very energetic, want to run around, be noisy disruptive etc etc.

I feel that this is because not so long ago and for all generations before that, young boys would have been with their dads a lot of the time, spending their time being useful in their community and also learning important skills for hunting, fishing, making bows, arrows etc. They were learning, very early on what to do to be a man in that community.

They would have been outside all day everyday, using up this energy they have and would have felt like useful, respected members of the community.

I feel my dcs need to go for long walks everyday, which isn't always possible, but I feel that that would be one of the most natural things for them to be doing.

Instead, boys here today are given trampolines to bounce off their energy or just, as Fillyjonk says, labelled with ADHD etc.

If it was normal for our children to learn how to survive outside and get all their requirements from their local environment, that would keep them healthy mentally and physically. I often lament that we are not all in straw huts or caves in small villages. (Though perhaps somewhere warmer

What do you think? I know what I mean, I hope it is clear to you.

Do you have odd girls? They sound just like me! But I am odd!

Of the children I have met I would say that while girls obviously do enjoy playing outside, getting messy etc, less boys enjoy the quite, art crafty stuff.

Obviously there are exceptions. By my ds isn't one of them. And I raised them both with the same toys, same encoragement to do stuff, dd did Karate, as well as ds.

But for some reason my son#s testosterone failed to fall in with my plans, and he still treats any form of drawing or crafts as the work of the devil.

and wjhile we are an the subject, is it any wonder that boys don't enjoy reading when there are so few intersting books available to them when they are starting to read independently? Go to waterstones and there are pink fluffy books up the ying yang, and hardly anything that would interest my (loveley) son.

I think that's true. My DSs loved the arty crafty stuff when they were tiny but by 3 or 4 they were far less interested.

My dd and ds often play together and both seem to like playing similar imaginary games with their friends.

The difference is that ds likes 'fighting' with his friends and making loud noises whereas dd doesn't enjoy (and never has) physically fighting with her friends. Lots of talking, negotiating and some plain old nastiness/ganging up though! (
There is nothing wrong with either type of behaviour (as long as it doesn't go too far obviously).

Ds is currently in the nursery class where dd also went. Main difference is the teacher's approach from what I can see so far.

Don't agree with op. Think that's all wishy washy stuff that doesn't really mean anything.

I hear this comment from mums quite a lot. Since mums are female and their sons are male, I think they just jump to conclusions that their boys are so different when there is, in fact, no such significant difference between boys and girls.

I have never heard dads go on about how hard it is to be a boy these days.

As boys are surrounded by women a lot especially with the ridiculously high number oif female primary teachers, I worry this view that it's so hard and different for them will become more widespread with nothing to back it up.

Personally I am all for feminising boys, it might make them grow into half decent men [tongue in cheek emoticon]

Books for boys: that's what public libraries are for. Not that my library is great (in small town of popn=only 12,000), but I have found enough books there for DS. It's harder if you have a lad like mine who prefers adventure and vehicles and isn't so keen on animals/football/wizards/girl protagonists, but suitable books are there to find.
Take him with you so he can find what interests him.
Tell me what level he's reading at, MB, see if I can think of something to recommend.

Oh my son loves arts and crafts!

Tip all glitter out, run cars through it.
Squeeze all plasticine together, run cars through it.
Pile small things to stick on stuff together, run cars through them.
Tear up paper to use as tiny people in cars.

We are members of our local library, and I do take him there. However there are a limited number of books for him to acces on his own. He is 7, and reads at the 6.5-7 age level, he is still working on levels 7 and 8 of the ORT.

When my dd was at this level there wew more books to interest her.

No such luck with ds. We still read together, we always have, but he cannot access anything that interest him. Even the Tintin/ asterrix, cartoon type books are too difficult to held his attention, and help to develp his reading confidence.

He is aslo dyspraxic, whic doesn't help

also, there are LOADS of books aimed at boys. If you look at the books publihsed in a year (I looked through the Edinburgh book Festival programme for kids), the majority are clearly aimed at boys, from cover designs, to characters to genres.

The marketing is greater for the daft fairy books so they are more visible in big chain book stores, but most new books have a strong pro-boy bias.

And why should boys object to a female main character? Girls never object to a male main character.

Barrington Stoke books are great for boys just learning to read independently.

[sigh]

Yes, I only want him to eat baby eating bastard fiction.

I,don't object to female 'leads' and neither does he. But the fairy books are a hard sell

And girls too - but the one DS2 has just finished is called 'Tod in Biker City', and contains cool biker illustrations, and scenes of near calamity.

He loves it!

Some of those look excellent Hump, thank you.

I have bookmarked the site, and can feel some spending coming on.

I don't think it's just girls. It's not good for any child to always be in a confined unnatural adult-dominated environment.

my 2 have actually volunteered to spend their money on a book after I read them one of the Hiccup Horrendous Haddock 111 series (about dragons and Vikings!

This is unheard of in our house....

FMF, David Tennant reads the audiobooks of that series. Has kept us entertained on many a long car journey.

orm, totraly agree with you that all kids need to have child only time when they are at the right age.

plus I don't think it's that bad a thing if some children just aren't really into reading fiction. That's another issue though I suppose.

Ooh, MB.
Just had a browse, and The Book People website has a Barrington Stoke set of 6 books for £8.99.

Of itself I agree. However it can be even harder to find interesting non-fiction pitched at the right reading level.

Ohh, thank you for that!

You're welcome.

Agreed there's an annoying imbalance of many more books for young reading girls, but we have actually done ok with finding books for boys.

Sorry to report, pointydog, maybe my boy is the only sexist out there!? Turns his nose right up at girl characters.

MB: What about Simpson's comics? Boys Rule Series? Books about football and footie players? Vehicles, tunnels, etc.? Joke books? There's a fictional series about creepy crawlie characters, spider-people (ghost stories are another no-go with mine, though, which further limits our selection).

Oh, I know one that might suit your lad. Aristotle, by Dick King.

Does your library have shelves for 'young readers'. If I dig around long enough in there, I find reasonably suitable books. I was looking thru those shelves today and thought I'd remember more of the titles (alas, I don't). But I'm sure some of the books in our local library, anyway, would suit your lad. Maybe I'll remember next week and note down some titles 4 u.

IIRC you're a teacher so perhaps have reservations about this, but I also reckon if we grab any book that DC can read, then they do benefit as long as they enjoyed it -- even if it's obviously below their nominal level. Though it's not really stretching them, it keeps the love of reading ticking over.

Must state my wishlist for library books, though. I would like all books for under 15s to have 2 separate ratings on them,

• reading complexity level
• maturity of content

Because I spend a lot of time trying to find stuff appropriate for an 8yo who can read stuff written for 13yos. "Oh yuck!" he exclaimed, about one of the Alex Rider books (otherwise reasonably suitable, I did read it all first to be sure). "They kissed!" complained DS bitterly.

Oh, we do try with the reading. To the point where I do most of the text of a more complex, and interesting, book, and stop so that ds can read the odd word, or sentence.

He can't manage the simpsons (text too small and too complex same basic problem as Tintin etc)

If I pick a book that is below ds reading level, then we are looking at books for 5 year olds. And that isn't going to wash. He already is 'sensitive' about his reading as it is. Sugesting that he read, 'the little red train' would blow us all out of the water, I think

We had the opposite problem with dd who read beyond her age, but that was solved more simply for her, as she was happy to read the older books, What Katy did, Anne of Green Gables etc. these suite her reading ability, but were emotionally 'safe' for an 8 year old.