What to do

[Insaneinthebrain3]

Hi all this is my first post at all on mn.
So I'm seriously think about homeschooling for my two youngest dc. The reason behind it is they are missing so much school and it's mainly due to anxiety which is making them ill. They are intelligent and doing well but they are feeling so much pressure. Dh isn't so sure but to me it's the only way that makes sense. They both now having to go for therapy (which I know will be helpful for them) They hate school, it's making them ill and are not learning as not going in. He is worried about later in life, exams and the social aspects - I said they need to join some groups - they do have some issues with "people" anyway.
Hit me with your pros and cons x

Sorry should have said they are 7 and 8 x

I can't see any reason why 7 and 8 year olds should be living lives that are so stressful they would need a therapist (I mean, unless there's bereavement or abuse or serious illness or something going on). If school is making that stressed then for goodness sake get them out pronto!!

Look on facebook for home educators in your area. You'll find that there are all different kinds of reasons for home educating, and all sorts of families, and in amongst them, you'll almost certainly find some people that your children really click with, if you take time to keep looking.

What's causing the stress?

It seems to me that your concerns about your children continuing to attend school are related to the current crisis, whereas your husband's concerns about home education are about the long term outlook.

For this reason, I think the sensible course of action would be to take them out of school ASAP to help restore their health and happiness, but with the understanding that the family might decide they need to return to school at some point after they have recovered.

A brief spell of home education would buy some relief for all of you. Once things have calmed down, there will be plenty of time for you and your dh to do some research and some hard thinking and some observation of how your own children respond to being out of school.

At that point, you might decide between you that your dh's worries were unfounded and long term home ed is fine after all. Or you might decide that there are problems with how you are home educating, but that you can find ways to fix them without the need to send the children back to school. Or you might decide that it would be best to send them back to school in a year or two.

Does your dh have any immediate worries about home ed? Does he see any reason why you shouldn't do it for a year or so, given how much suffering school is causing the children right now?

Thanks for responses
There are health issues but not sure if they are as a response to the anxiety or other way round.
You're right, dh is thinking 10 years down the line and I'm thinking right now.
Lots to think about but I know which way I'm thinking.
Sorry for quick response at this time but one of them has woken up crying 😔

Have you spoken to the school about the cause of this anxiety? Has it always been an issue or just this year? Is there a medical explanation for it? Have they had any input from GPs etc?

Oh yes constantly talking to school
Been a year and a half for youngest and middle dc has always been like it but getting worse with age not better.
One got first appt for assessment for asd next week but I feel it's a sensory issue and other under 2 different departments and had lots of testing/different medication for past year.

The schools will still be there in September.

The schools will still be there the September after.

The schools will still be there when they reach secondary age.

The schools will still be there when they embark on GCSEs.

The schools will still be there when they embark on A levels or BTecs or whatever.

I'm not a believer in "jam tomorrow" for children - meet their needs and provide situations in which they can thrive TODAY. If they are then ready to go to school next month, next year, next decade, that's the time to send them!