Would we be unreasonable to suggest a larger cottage for the family holiday?

[ist]

For the last 20 years, we have rented the same holiday cottage from some of my dad’s friends (market rate). We’re a group of 10 family + 2 newer partners. DF is now 92 and in generally good health for age.

Every year we rent the same cottage in Norfolk. There’s only room for 10. My DD and my nephew each want to bring their respective partners, to make 12.

DF is insisting we rent the same cottage, meaning partners couldn’t come. DF pays, even though we could all afford to chip in.

The cottage was nice 20 years ago but honestly is a bit like a student house, i e cheap beds and cheap everything now.

Would we be unreasonable to refuse an old man his family holiday? This is essentially what it boils down to, if we say no.

Why would it boil down to him being refused his holiday? Would he refuse to go?

He's 92. I'd just go.

Agree with this.

Book the usualmcottage and a two bed flat nearby for the kids. Shared meals and outings.

Tents in the garden?

I think I’d get dd & dnephew to flip a coin. Losers don’t go/take a tent/book a caravan, taking the numbers back down to 10.

Next year they swap.

You might find that one or other of the young couples says ‘oh sod it, we just won’t come then.’

Again, problem solved.

Ultimately if your df is still around in a few years there may well be a dggc or two to be included, so the dynamic of the whole extended family being included isn’t sustainable anyway. But given he’s 92 I’d probably humour him as to venue but he’ll just have to deal with not having the whole clan coming if there’s no room at the inn.

Please just go and enjoy the family time you can spend with him and make memories. There will come a time when you wont be able to.

He’s 92 enjoy his holiday with him.

Book a second smaller cottage for the overflow.

Yes I would just book another cottage for some of the grandkids and partners?

I’d consider campervan rental (or something) whoever stays in it can use loo/ shower in the house. Great for days out as you can park up somewhere scenic and have a cup of tea without a walk . I’m assuming at 92 mobility might be an issue.

I have a camper and would much rather sleep in it than a past it holiday cottage.

I’d go, it’s obviously special for him and each year might be the last time, I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to say no. Can you try and find overflow accommodation as others have suggested.

If the kids are young adults with partners do they actually want to use up precious holiday time even if it's free. Could they dovetail - swop mid way.
He is old - and I appreciate what everyone is saying about last memories. But that doesn't mean he can dictate.