Holidaying alone…

[SurreySideEye]

I’m happily single and I’m looking to go away abroad on a simple pool/beach holiday just for some change and rest, I don’t want to be involved with the ‘singles scene’ so I’m not looking to meet a prospective partner or even have a ‘holiday fling’ nor do I want to stay in a hotel where I’ll be seated with strangers at mealtimes…basically I’d just like to holiday alone. Are there any ‘Mumsnetters’ out there who’ve done this and could offer some suggestions ?

I'm really wishing that pp had clarified why they chose to post that, because without clarification it's difficult not to wondering if they were implying women shouldn't do those things alone, which would be beyond ridiculous in my view. I suspect they've been scared off by the derision the comment has quite rightly attracted.

This has certainly been a very interesting discussion.

Covered the topic from many different angles, mostly positive.

At the end of the day it's about what you want to do/not do, want to engage/happy to be alone, accommodation type, etc. Above all, please do your homework. That destination you think is safe may not be.....🤔😇

There are some posters on here who have said they 'wouldn't be comfortable' going into a bar or cafe on their own, and there have been a lot of posts down the years along the lines of 'Would it be unreasonable to go to the cinema on my own?' as if going to see a film was the equivalent of setting out solo to Antarctica without telling anyone where you were going.

I suppose it's hardly surprising that for someone who couldn't have a pint and do the crossword in their local, or go and see the new Spielberg at the cineplex by themselves, the idea of getting onto a train, plane or boat and actually going on holiday for a week or a fortnight by themselves is a bridge too far.

When I’m chatting to people about this I always say do you enjoy eating out, coffees, shows on your own? Basically if you enjoy ‘dates’ on your own and also enjoy holidays there’s a much much higher chance of enjoying a solo trip.
One of my DS’s has been on five trips on his own after an accidental solo trip as he was let down by friends. Another DS tried a mini break inspired by myself and his DB, he didn’t last the night saying he was lonely and missed home and got a midnight train back home.
My DS has worked out three or four night city breaks work best for him (ideally three). I prefer all inclusive resorts and then book an excursion every other day or do some sort of small activity such as have a massage on some of the other days. The only thing I don’t enjoy is the bar in the evening but to be honest I’ve spent so much time in bars with my husband over the years I don’t miss this.
In Egypt there was a fantastic light/water/fountain show each evening at my hotel so I’d sit in a little tippee after dinner and my walk and watch it.
Then I’d go back to my room and read/go on my phone and have a fairly early night. It was bliss.

I'm a lot older than most of you lot I reckon, in my 60s. An intrepid solo traveller from a young age, I was fearless then. At 23 way back before internet and sat nav etc. I took myself off the US alone. Went to NY, Washington, New Orleans, Phoenix, LA, SF and Savannah. I wouldn't do it now though, funny isn't it?

It's Europe for me going forward. Shorter flights, GHIC health care, good public transport and so on. (I have annual travel insurance aswell).

One thing I do agree with from a pp. Air bnb is definitely not an option for me, and should be used with caution by those alone. I know most of you are younger and more carefree than I am now, but I would worry about something happening to me and no one around to get a doctor etc. Also the idea of how many bloody keys are out there aswell. I use hotels but I always bring a door wedge just in case.

In my younger days when I was hassled by the local Romeos (great memories, those days long gone now as I'm invisible!), I pretended I was deaf, they moved on quickly after trying to communicate when I repeated "What, what what" forever 😊

I traveled for work when I was still at uni as part of my summer job and then I studied and worked abroad. I did all of it on my own - obviously made friends once I was there and either studying or working, but it was all really good experience. Like @palran (whose post I loved), it was in the days before the internet, satnav and google maps! I drove all over Europe in a shitty old British car with maps in different languages and only payphones, when you could find them and have the right currency and hope they were working, to get you in touch with anyone who might be able to help if you ran into trouble.

I still travel for work from time to time and that is rarely in a group, so again you are on your own. Nowadays it is very easy to be in contact with people all over the place, so it feels s easy and it wouldn't occur to me to feel self-conscious about eating alone, going to the theatre, cinema or doing anything at all alone.

For those posters who do feel anxious or fearful about a solo holiday, I'm sure you must go to the supermarket alone, into town on your own, go for a walk on your own, to the gym on your own etc. I'm wondering why it is such a big leap to go from doing those things in the UK on your own to just being in another country on your own? I wonder if the word "holiday" has become connected with the idea of families away together or couples away together and that makes potential solo people anxious?! Don't know, just thinking aloud really.

My dream i would like to go on a solo holiday !!!!!

Watching this thread as I’m vaguely thinking of planning a holiday alone when I no longer have my old dog. I’m 70, I’d prefer to eat alone and be left alone. I’d want all-inclusive, adult-only, and a pool warm enough to swim a couple of widths, about shoulder deep, shallow enough to touch the bottom. Pools where people are jumping in and splashing around terrify me! Might be 2-3 years researching it!

kefalos Greece is a great place for solo travellers, very laid back, beautiful beaches, and welcoming restaurants, no loud music its so peaceful and relaxing. have a look at Jet2 but avoid The Hermes Hotel its at the top of a very steep hill a good walk from the beach, try kamari Bay area.

Similar age group here... HI!

I wonder if you could treat yourself to a swim up room at some nice hotel/complex? Search for swim up rooms in the country/resort you want and see if it would work for you. I'm not sure of the depth though! I'd nearly forget about AI and do b+b or half/full board if necessary to the get the privacy of a swim up room. But you never know, there could be AI resorts out there with such private swim ups.

Someone with more knowledge of these types of accommodation might be able to help.

I've had a short break with my dog this year, so not quite alone. Chose a small complex of converted cottages, thought she might make doggy friends. Wandering about the gardens late at night when it dawned on me that there wasn't actually anyone else staying! Have booked a cruise for next year, somewhere I've always wanted to visit. I don't mind chatting to people at dinner but I'm equally happy left to my own devices.

Pretty much anywhere in Greece, I’ve also enjoyed the Île de Ré, Porto, lots of Spanish city breaks. I do have friends, honest!

Why…?

this is a completely unhelpful comment to what the op is asking

That’s been repeatedly asked through the thread & I doubt the poster’s coming back to explain. My guesses are fear, anxiety or a controlling husband.

It could be lack of confidence, anxiety, living a small life, only does stuff with 10 relatives, who knows?

I think there are lots of people that are nervous to do things alone - I went to Richmond last week for a change of scenery, couple of hours train ride. I met up with a group from a hobby I attend a couple of days later and mentioned I had gone up there, and one of them said ‘what? on your own?!!

Poor things.

All my best holidays have been solo, though I like meeting up with family or friends if I’m in their area. I’m going to Norway by myself in the autumn & I’m really excited.

I am so envious! That’s a place I would love to visit - I hope you have a fantastic time!

I'm currently planning my first solo holiday abroad so I'm finding this thread very helpful! I have done several UK breaks solo, staying in apartments and I enjoyed them a lot but I do still have a bit of nervousness about going into restaurants alone in the evening.
I'd love some specific recommendations for hotels where solo travellers are not unusual. I was looking at some adults only places but wondered if that might actually be worse if the set up is all romatic meals for couples! I'd like somewhere with a nice pool and in or near a town to explore and somewhere I can go hiking.

@milkandblackspiders I'm staying at the Aluasoul Orotava Valley in Tenerife next week - it's AI and adults-only but doesn't seem to advertise as 'romantic' - in the hills 20 mins away from Puerto de la Cruz. Obviously not been yet (and I'm not a hiker) but happy to report back!

@milkandblackspiders if I feel like the restaurants where I am have a very coupley feel in the evenings, I tend to make my main restaurant meal at lunchtime when things tend to feel more casual and then I'll just get some street food or something more snacky in the evenings. For city breaks, this is rarely an issue, but in resorts where you get more families and couples then my preference is usually for a lunchtime restaurant.

... or one of those posters who likes to bitchplop on a thread, thinking that they're funny?!

Thanks both for your suggestions - I'm currently browsing on easyjet holidays and overwhelmed with options! One downside of solo travel is how to choose when you don't have to factor in anyone elses preferences!

I did this in a lovely guesthouse in Nerja near Malaga. Nerja and Malaga both nice places where you can wander around safely and have a meal on your own without being harassed.

I just spent most of a fortnight cycling alone around Ireland. Was a great way of being 'alone', yet with some lovely friendly interactions on campsites, in cafes and some pubs/hotels for evening meals.
Being Ireland I had more issues with the rain than applying sun cream :-(

I am however on reflection looking to join a small group ride / tour next year, as I did find I wanted more interactions than perhaps I thought I did...