Kids club - will I get to relax??! Single parent

outthereandbeyond · 2025-05-24T22:53:54+00:00

So I’ve booked a very expensive holiday for my child and I at a chic all inclusive in Turkey this summer. Hotel offers a kids club that gets great reviews. I’ve basically hinged the entire holiday on the fantasy that my kid will play with children all day long and I will get to read a bloody book for the first time in 8 years (yes she’s 8). Those who have gone on holiday with one child - so they actually leave you alone and go to the kids club? How does the hotel kids club work??

ToKittyornottoKitty · 24/05/2025 23:55

Is your child that outgoing at home?

Original poster

outthereandbeyond · 24/05/2025 23:56

ToKittyornottoKitty · 24/05/2025 23:55

Is your child that outgoing at home?

Very. Doesn’t stop. Very sociable. Loves kids clubs with her friends in UK but she knows when I’m relaxing. And it makes her uneasy - it’s her mission to annoy me whenever I sit down to relax

OP posts:

MumChp · 25/05/2025 00:00

outthereandbeyond · 24/05/2025 23:56

Very. Doesn’t stop. Very sociable. Loves kids clubs with her friends in UK but she knows when I’m relaxing. And it makes her uneasy - it’s her mission to annoy me whenever I sit down to relax

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She doesn't need to be informed you are going to relax.
Just send her to childrens' club. It will be great fun for her.

RedSetter78 · 25/05/2025 00:01

Also a single mum here. No, my DD didn’t ‘leave me alone’ and go to kids club but I’m also not the type of mother that wants rid of my child on holiday.. Still had plenty of time to relax and read my books though! Surely at 8 your DD can entertain herself for a while or play with friends? They always make some at the pool

Calmdownpeople · 25/05/2025 00:02

Totally depends on the kid. I have family who leave their kids in kids club and they absolutely hate it but ‘they need a break’. Other kids don’t mind as much. I think the word fantasy is right and needs to be a balance between spending time with you as well.

I wouldn’t do it as I go on holiday to spend time with my kids. But hey I’m not a single parent so I understand why you would want the space.

I wouldn’t bank the whole holiday on it and again it completely depends on your child. many people will give an opinion but it doesn’t matter as this is a personal experience, The activities and if there are other English kids to make friends with (can be hard if the kids speak another language and how well the staff speak English). She may love it or she may hate it’s. Be prepared for both and don’t base it on how she is at home.

BarbaraVineFan · 25/05/2025 00:04

I am a single mum to a 5 year old and I completely understand this anxiety! My advice would be to start sending her to kids club early in the holiday, and maybe establishing a routine where she goes to kids club, say, every morning and then you pick her up at lunchtime. When my DD and I went to Turkey last year, I didn’t get her into the kids club early enough in the week, and then the other children had all made friends and she was too shy to integrate. If you start early, there will be other kids who have also just arrived and she will hopefully play with them.

alcoholnightmare · 25/05/2025 00:04

I’m a single mum too, and took my 3 to Spain in Easter hols… in my experience my three all popped in and out of kids club as and when they fancied - to show me a picture, for a drink, for a cuddle… whatever.
so I picked a sunlounger near the entrance to the kids club and made sure they knew where I was. I asked for them not to be allowed to come and go as they pleased and gave my phone number, but that lasted about half an hour! Mine are 6,5&5.

Original poster

outthereandbeyond · 25/05/2025 00:05

MumChp · 25/05/2025 00:00

She doesn't need to be informed you are going to relax.
Just send her to childrens' club. It will be great fun for her.

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Yes. Of course I wouldn’t frame it like that to her. Just that I’d be going with adults

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Tiswa · 25/05/2025 00:12

Hotel kids clubs vary but my concern for you would be at 8 it could either be boring as they are young or drop in.

also they can be indoors so you really want them to be indoors all day

we did a holiday with DD that had a great kids club 3-7 that did activities inside for 2 hours perfect for her but by 8 she had outgrown it

by 8 unless it is a drop in type thing most have

StaringAtTheWater · 25/05/2025 00:15

in my experience my three all popped in and out of kids club as and when they fancied - to show me a picture, for a drink, for a cuddle… whatever

That sounds very dangerous! - what if a child just wanders off, or can't find their mum or dad? I think you must have been quite unlucky. All the hotel kids clubs I've experienced have taken safeguarding very seriously - a parent has to sign them in and out again. If a child doesn't settle and is very unhappy, they will ring the parent to ask them to collect them. I can't imagine them just allowing a child to leave on their own

Original poster

outthereandbeyond · 25/05/2025 00:44

StaringAtTheWater · 25/05/2025 00:15

in my experience my three all popped in and out of kids club as and when they fancied - to show me a picture, for a drink, for a cuddle… whatever

That sounds very dangerous! - what if a child just wanders off, or can't find their mum or dad? I think you must have been quite unlucky. All the hotel kids clubs I've experienced have taken safeguarding very seriously - a parent has to sign them in and out again. If a child doesn't settle and is very unhappy, they will ring the parent to ask them to collect them. I can't imagine them just allowing a child to leave on their own

It might depend on the size of the hotel and or the culture. I imagine this wouldn’t be an issue for a smaller and fenced in compound. Or a country with lesser child regulations.

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Tiswa · 25/05/2025 08:53

@outthereandbeyond but you do recognise that kids clubs are indoors?

yiu can’t really think she will be happy in there all day? Get the balance right for both of you

best case scenarios is that she goes 2 hours and then makes friends and wants to spend time with them. But also make time with her - she will grow up soon mine is 16 and I really enjoy day trips and weekends away with her

numbbumm · 25/05/2025 09:17

I wouldn’t seriously expect the whole days to yourself. I work full time and want to spend time with my children on holiday but would also try holiday clubs for a bit. Can’t you have a balance of a couple of hours a day?

Original poster

outthereandbeyond · 25/05/2025 10:00

Tiswa · 25/05/2025 08:53

@outthereandbeyond but you do recognise that kids clubs are indoors?

yiu can’t really think she will be happy in there all day? Get the balance right for both of you

best case scenarios is that she goes 2 hours and then makes friends and wants to spend time with them. But also make time with her - she will grow up soon mine is 16 and I really enjoy day trips and weekends away with her

What makes you think that all kids clubs are indoors? The one we have chosen is a combo. Has climbing walls and pony treks as part of the deal. Besides I don’t expect her to be inside for 8 hours of the day even if it was all indoors. I’m happy to have her with me at the pool / beach

OP posts:

Original poster

outthereandbeyond · 25/05/2025 10:01

numbbumm · 25/05/2025 09:17

I wouldn’t seriously expect the whole days to yourself. I work full time and want to spend time with my children on holiday but would also try holiday clubs for a bit. Can’t you have a balance of a couple of hours a day?

I will follow her lead and have no expectations, but greatly encourage her to make friends and do the clubs.

OP posts:

Tiswa · 25/05/2025 10:36

outthereandbeyond · 25/05/2025 10:00

What makes you think that all kids clubs are indoors? The one we have chosen is a combo. Has climbing walls and pony treks as part of the deal. Besides I don’t expect her to be inside for 8 hours of the day even if it was all indoors. I’m happy to have her with me at the pool / beach

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so it has excursions then?

take her lead and don’t push because that is where the clinginess can come from.

a good balance here is what is needed

No3392 · 25/05/2025 11:11

I don't put my daughter in kids clubs, she wouldn't want that. But she always makes friends. The last holiday we went on, she met a friend the second day and that was it, she was with her and barely spoke to me after!

1SillySossij · 25/05/2025 11:20

Poor little millstone!

hedgerunner · 25/05/2025 11:29

My dc hated kids clubs at that age. The only time we could get her to go was when she had a cousin with her.
Every child is different though and lots of kids do love going. I would start planting the seed, have a look online to see if there are any photos of the kids club and talk about the rough plan- we’ll have breakfast, then you’ll go to kids club and I’ll be doing an adult exercise class. Then we’ll have lunch and spend the afternoon by the pool.

Bigfatsunandclouds · 25/05/2025 11:42

1SillySossij · 25/05/2025 11:20

Poor little millstone!

Oh come on, thats not kind. Kids club isn't a punishment, mine actively wanted to go - they did 2 sessions a day for 2 hours and yes it was bliss. Not everyday and I happily spent loads of time with them in the pool/beach excursions but sometimes it was great that they wanted to play fun games and parties with loads of other kids.

Are you a single parent? Being a single parent on holiday is full on, you wouldn't expect to be parenting and on all the time at home as you have distractions and childcare/school. Holidays can be intense for everyone and parents need a break.

OnlyMabelInTheBuilding · 25/05/2025 11:44

My two have never been to kids club (never wanted to go) but they are both confident swimmers after years of insisting they keep up with swimming lessons. So they can be in the pool with me close by on a lounger, and the last few years, they’ve made a succession of friends round the pool. Our last few holidays have actually been fairly relaxing.

foobio · 25/05/2025 11:53

Mine love a kids club, thank goodness!

Check how booking works, some hotels are drop in with unlimited numbers, others you need to book exactly 24h in advance on an app, and sell out in seconds

Radra · 25/05/2025 13:27

I don't really mind if mine go to kids clubs or but they usually do enjoy them - not all day, usually for a 2-3 hour stretch every day.

But coming at this from a different angle - why not take some annual leave leave when she is in school and read a book then?

KierEagan · 25/05/2025 13:31

RedSetter78 · 25/05/2025 00:01

Also a single mum here. No, my DD didn’t ‘leave me alone’ and go to kids club but I’m also not the type of mother that wants rid of my child on holiday.. Still had plenty of time to relax and read my books though! Surely at 8 your DD can entertain herself for a while or play with friends? They always make some at the pool

Edited

Perhaps OP isn’t the type of mother to let her mind wander while her child is in or near a swimming pool.

TartanMammy · 25/05/2025 14:58

My children have always hated kids clubs and just wanted to be by the pool with us. They usually made friends and might join in the organised activities by the pool too. But they really didn't want to go to the childcare type of kids clubs unfortunately.

But as a child I bloody loved them! The reps were always so fun and we did amazing activities. So it really depends on the child.

My advice would be to make it a of a non-negotiable if you really need the down time. Everyone needs a break from kids don't let anyone make you feel bad about that. 'At 11am you'll go to kids club, I'll collect you at 2pm, then we'll have lunch and go to the pool.' Perhaps choose either morning or afternoon session and make it part of your routine.
Hopefully she'll make a friend there and be begging to go!