I'll try to summarise the story so far ......
Ex left 11yrs ago ( two children who were 3 yr 3mnths and 3 mnths). Said he was going to work away and would be back in two weeks. 1 month later phoned to say he wasn't coming back. He cleared out the bank accounts, left mortgage arrears, business debts, took all the business assets (tools) and vehicle.
Saw children infrequently for 1st year then no contact for 4 years. ( I had no contact details for him but kept in touch with his Mum). We moved closer to where he was (unknowingly!!)and he contacted us, starting seeing the children for weekends. (He is now married with a step child and a 3yr old). We moved away and he after a year my son decided to live with him (about 300 miles away). He takes them on holiday abroad at least twice a year whilst I am still struggling finacially and mentally. ( I have a wonderful boyfriend who supports his children from a previous marriage so finds it very difficult to understand exs' behaviour)
The CSA have now demanded a back payment of approx £30k. he wants me to say I don't want it on the basis that he will 'go bankrupt' if I don't and if I do he 'says he will be in a better position to ' help' in the future.
I am still paying of debts.
I am afraid he will turn the children against
me if I refuse.
Help!