So where do we take our 11 yr old DS that he might actually enjoy?

[rookiemere]

Currently in Tenerife . Nice weather, complex with lots of activities and (kind of) heated pool and DS seems to want to spend most of his time holed up in the apartment on his iPad . He's out at the water park with DH at the minute- but claims that as he has been before he is not excited about it and would rather be at home.

He's ok about summer hols as will be with his cousin and generally things work ok if with other families but we prefer our own space too.

So any good suggestions from others? DS is sporty and competitive (so is DH) but doesn't seem to be much of a joiner. We like warm weather and things to do.

West coast US.

The national parks are great for off roading and mountain biking.
California coast for surfing/sailing.
Hiking in the mountains.
Disney/other theme parks
You can do a couple of days ranching which I loved.
Depending on whether you wanted to camp/rv it you could keep constantly changing.

He sounds really ungrateful. I wouldn't be planning any more holidays until he changed his attitude tbh. I'd be furious if I took my DC to Tenerife and they moaned!

Actually Minnie we did a similar trip to Canada and he did enjoy that but budget doesn't reach to that every year.

I think he is a bit spoilt. I do like holidays and by getting flights in advance this week is no dearer than it would have been to go to Center Parcs which I suspect he would have preferred.

He'd probably be delighted if we didn't go in holiday. His favourite occupation is playing either physically or online with his pal next door (and yes we've tried asking him to come with us but no go)

I'm just hoping there is some destination or solution I haven't thought of.

DS seems to want to spend most of his time holed up in the apartment on his iPad

Just limit the amount of time he's allowed on the ipad, then take it away once his time is up. Once he realises the ipad isn't an option, he may start to want to do other things

Agree with budgie,my dc (and I!) default to fiddling with gadgets given the chance but take them away and we have much more fun.

We've done some brilliant family activity holidays with Explore and Exodus where the gadgets have hardly been used.

Have to say though, I wouldn't put up with this behaviour - I'd be telling him to get a grip and stop being so selfish/spoiled or the gadgets are confiscated and won't be going on the next holiday. And I'd mean it.

You may be right we might need to limit screen time . I think he may just also have outgrown beach holidays for the time being.

He's entitled to not enjoy particular types of holiday, same as the rest of us, for example my DCs will only tolerate a couple of half days at a beach on a week long holiday. They do enjoy walking, sightseeing, pottering round giftshops, crazy golf, fairs and theme parks so we do a lot of that sort of thing on holiday. It's always a bit of a compromise but I agree with being stricter about gadget use.

Could you try an outdoort pursuits type holiday? Stuff like sailing/windsurfing/kayaking? We loved doing those kind of holidays as preteens/teenagers
And just leave the ipad at home next time

Or a flotilla sailing holiday or similar?

Or possibly he would prefer a week at a PGL type place with kids his own age and organised sports?

Kids don't care about holiday locations or scenery or a nice beach. They just need other kids to interact with. How would you feel if you had to spend every bit of your holiday with kids and no other adult to chat to?
Plan a cheap holiday and take one of his friends with you.

We'd happily take one of his pals on holidays but most have a younger sibling so seem reluctant to lend them out lest they be left in the same situation as us.

He has one pal and his DM has said she would be delighted for him to come on holidays with us and vice Versa but this boy still wakes in the night sometimes and likes to snuggle in with his parents and I can't see DS going away with a pal or to PGL just yet.

He's a real homeboy not like us.

Beach holidays are quite dull though aren't they? Ds (13) likes his x-box, youtube, Netflix etc and is a bit of an introvert. If not holed up in his room he can be found playing football. He really doesn't get too excited at the prospect of beach holidays and finds them boring (I can relate).

However - he really enjoys sight seeing, so either holidays that include visits to places of historical interest / interesting natural phenomena / activity holidays (like your ds, Centre parcs is a winner) etc

Beach holidays are quite dull though aren't they? Ds (13) likes his x-box, youtube, Netflix etc and is a bit of an introvert. If not holed up in his room he can be found playing football. He really doesn't get too excited at the prospect of beach holidays and finds them boring (I can relate).

However - he really enjoys sight seeing, so either holidays that include visits to places of historical interest / interesting natural phenomena / activity holidays (like your ds, Centre parcs is a winner) etc

oops posted too soon - will continue below

Could you stretch to Singapore? Tons of cool stuff - ArtScience and Tech Museums. F1 circuit, night safari, Disney, Sentosa if you need a beach, shopping.

Would he like to swim in the world's highest pool?

Winners for us have been places like Costa Rica (so much varied wild life), Hawaii (amazing snorkelling, active volcanoes to fly over) but I see that budget is an issue....

How about Centreparcs in Europe? I haven't been, but a friend tells me they are better priced than the UK, include all the usual activities, and have the advantage of being in places like Holland where you can take the option of sightseeing outside of the parc

Incidentally we are off for a 3 night city break to Liverpool tomorrow. We have already booked 'Shiverpool' (a 2 hour guided ghost walk), 'the Cursed Carnival' (an Escape room at Breakout, Liverpool), plan on popping into the Anglican Cathedral (largest in the UK I think), the Tate Liverpool, might do a tour of an underground road tunnel, will doubtless take the ferry across the Mersey, and will visit Crosby beach for the statues etc etc.

Last summer we had a fantastic few days at the Edinburgh festival.

I know you like warm weather - but there is a lot to be said for city breaks

hmc sounds like your DS and mine were separated at birth!
would he like to come on holiday with us 😜?

I think beach/pool holidays worked when he was younger so we've just stuck with them but time to ring the changes . Singapore sounds really exciting might start researching that. In October we are doing a two centre with Naples and Rome with sightseeing so we'll see how that goes.

I was an only child too and my parents only ever took me on adult oriented sight seeing trips and would never have considered a beach holiday so I suppose I wanted to make sure that DS had his fill.

Escape room as a family is a great idea - we tried something similar in Cornwall and DS loved it.
We can afford big holidays but I'd need to start prioritising quality over quantity.
CP in Europe is also an ace idea. DS loves CP but DH is not so keen, but he might be less averse to one abroad.

There will be stacks to do in Naples and Rome - sounds like a winner!

I get what you are saying about adult orientated sight seeing trips - the trick is to mix it up isn't it

Enjoy the rest of your holiday

I hear you. One of the reasons I think my teen doesn't like holidays is because he isn't bored enough now he has an iPads and computers.. He can't see the point of going somewhere new for the sake of it. He's not sporty so none of that appeals. He quite likes architecture but obviously that doesn't go constitute enough of the holiday, even with somewhere like Barcelona.

I'm probably just going to leave it and do short breaks with my friends until he actually tells me he wants to go somewhere.

So I've booked us on the submarine tomorrow and segway trip on Friday. Hopefully that will provide some excitement. I persuaded him to go to the pool for pool game time and then it was cancelled because its cloudy. Oh well mini golf soon !

take him to grandma's for a week & go on holiday without. Everyone happy.

Nice idea ragged but I'm of the sandwich generation so parents need caring rather than being able to look after DS besides I do want to spend holidays with him -but doing something we all enjoy.