A level results disaster

[LadySadMum]

DS was predicted CDD which was low and based on not doing much work in year 12. However he really started working much better in year 13 and seemed to be getting better marks in his results for mocks and class tests.

So we were hopeful that he would get better than the predicted grades. He seemed happy after each exam, completed all the questions. There were a few questions that he said were hard but this is normal, right?

Anyway he got CEU. Obviously he missed his firm and insurance but it’s not even enough for any foundation courses.

The C is fine and the E was in his worst subject so can understand that. But the U is unexpected and I feel it can’t be right as he wasn’t that bad at it!

We’ve asked for a review to make sure all the questions were marked correctly and if it changes to an E that would get him onto a foundation degree. We made a mistake as we didn’t ask for it at the time (we were shocked and didnt think to ask) and by the time we contacted the school again they had left.

The exam officer is not available until next Wednesday now so it’s an agonising wait.

The worst thing is we’ve had to lie to everyone that everything is OK and he’s been accepted into uni. His grandad is ill and would be devastated if we said he failed. We also don’t want to navigate all their questions and worries until we’ve worked out the next steps ourselves.

So now we’re getting congratulation messages from all the family and his uncle is also visiting later today, probably with a present. It’s all so so awful.

My son was 'asked' to leave school at the end of year 12 as unlikely to pass any A Levels.Would spoil their League Table result 😡He got a job in London as a runner ( didn't pay enough to cover train fares) Now Head of a major department for a multinational company. Do not despair

I'm sorry to hear about this. Must be very disappointing. However, I know someone who got into Oxford and they honestly didn't enjoy it at all. They wished they were somewhere else like a more mainstream Uni. York has a great reputation, wishing your DD well

Open University is not for the unmotivated. It's bloody expensive now too.

Don't they just retake the subject with the U? Maybe get a job as well? Can you do that, I don't know butthe culture thing is deeply unhelpful and pressurising.

You didnt "have" to lie

No one ever "has" to lie

Its sad that youre ashamed of your son and that keeping up appearances is more important than being there for him

I think you do need to try and reassess whether university is right. I’m honestly not sure that the ROI is worth it unless you are very academic and likely to land a grad scheme role. The reality is employers are not going to be knocking down the door of graduates from lower tier universities and pour a-levels. I actually think it’s criminal that there are seemingly courses that would take him with his grades. It feels very ‘bums on seats’ and revenue raising rather than being in a student’s best interest.

like others I think the lie will come out and it’ll all be worse re family. As worried as you are, I just don’t see how you can hide it.

I don't think the debt is worth it, you can pay for certifications (aws/azure) for a fraction of the price and its probably more useful for someone who wants a IT job, and work way up form a helpdesk role.

Its not too late to back out the lie, saying after much thought etc etc, poor kid, can't imagine how heavy he is feeling and parents piling on that.

Am doing an OU degree at the moment having done two other campus degrees and it is far, far harder than the other two - you need to be very self motivated and organised and there’s not masses of prompting/support at all - it might not be the right thing if motivation was the main problem in the first place.

I’d encourage him to resit. And stop lying about it. And it’s honestly not the end of the world. Don’t make upsetting your poorly dad something he needs to worry about. Call everyone and say you hadn’t wanted to say but he’s not done that well so you’re thinking about next steps. If he is academic and he’s just not applied himself then he can resit, if it’s just that he’s not academic then he should take some time to consider what he wants from life. College for a practical course or a leg up to a professional course like social work or physiotherapy.

Please, please reconsider university. He is clearly not cut out for it at the moment. He's interested in computers and that's something you can get in to through employment. In my experience every small- and medium-sized organisation I can think of has a dedicated "IT Person" who is just someone doing another role who happens to be informed about computers and can solve IT problems. What kinds of industries and workplaces is he interested in? I bet he could get in to a computer role with a bit of lateral thinking.

I’d just resist the E & U. Loads of people do it.

Also, the OU have a site called OpenLearn that put free module material to give a bit of a taster of what you’re looking at - if he is really thinking about it it might be worth taking a look at that to see if it seems like a good fit.

If you are North West have you tried Edge Hill, they do courses with a STEM foundation year.

Keep quiet and see the person next week..Then take it from there. If necessary after that, just.say he"s changed his plans. Nobody is.entitled to.know your business.

Definitely get remarks, my son initially missed out on his Oxford offer by one grade and after remarking went up and got in. Good luck.

Not all unis need good grades. They want to fill their courses. Last year a family member got accepted to her preferred uni with lower grades than they said they wanted and fellow students got even less.
Obviously this will not apply to Russell group unis.

@Fatsnowflake To add the marking of the papers first time around was shocking and it was done at 4am.

Not sure what you can do except come clean. It sounds like you panicked and couldn't think straight.

I know this isn't what you're asking but from personal experience I would say to use this as an opportunity to decide whether he wants to re-sit, work hard for year and get somewhere decent or do something entirely different. My own A level results were good enough for my safety choice but it was a bad choice and one I'd just made on a whim - I hated it. I have always regretted not doing what my best friend did - she re-took, re-thought and delayed uni entry for a year. It was a lonely year but she has never ever regretted it.

There is a lot of information online about how to advance in cyber security and from what I glanced at there is info on how to do courses without a degree. If this is what your DS is most interested in he needs to look there. Some of my family did Uni courses and I am one who didn't go. At the time I didn't feel being away from my parents was for me. I built a career that I enjoyed. Nowadays students end up owing thousands so they need to be sure they are ok with this. If he does want to go to Uni he could ask Clearing next week or if he feels re-takes would be the best then he could apply to return to school or go to a local college. If he has been at school he might enjoy college even more as he will have the chance to meet a new set of friends. I did far better going to a college than I did at school. In an academic year I got enough GCSEs to get taken on in the career I wanted. At college he will need to knuckle down and figure things out for himself than he would being at school. I enjoyed college far more than school so it could help him a lot. It was a different set up when I went to further Ed college. There were only a small group of teenagers but we quickly became friends. An aunty of mine was also doing courses at the same place and she said to me we could have all our breaks together and lunches but I told her I needed to make some friends and the small group thought it was far better to stay together so that is what we did. We were all wanting to do well which wasn't the case always at school . Mum told me that I had actually said college is great as we all wanted to learn. I would say he has got options. Surely members of the family will still be glad he is wanting better results to stand him in good stead. It might be the case he will need to move away. Just make sure he knows how to cook and can budget when it comes to shopping for food. I wish him well.

People are concentrating on the lying, I’ve already explained this. If he does get into a foundation course at the same university he wanted, we can explain what happened maybe next year as it won’t matter at that point.
Or he will do OU and still get a degree - no one will know where he’s doing it.
Or he does something else and we say he’s chosen that instead.

As explained, this was done to take the pressure off him while we work out the next steps.

I didn’t get the grades i needed I went to college and did a 2 year HND. Got enough merits to apply to 3rd year of the university course and graduated at the same time as people who started Uni the same year I started college.

There are other paths.

That’s your choice but I personally think it’s teaching him 1. You think it’s fine to lie to family. 2. Having a set back and not doing as well as you’d hoped is so shameful that he needs to lie and 3. That you’re embarrassed of him

Precisely. They are businesses. Interested in revenue.

The drop out rate has increased considerably. Especially in the first year. The biggest reason is mental stress. I suspect from students trying to do something they cannot in all honesty manage.

Not the same thing . This is incredibly tone deaf

Like A level marks, many degrees do not carry the gravitas that they used to hold once upon a time.
They have been devalued. Because so many people get them.