How much allowance to give when 18 year olds living at home?

[Bougis123]

My 18 year old DD is about to start at a local college and will be living at home (London). We want her to manage her own finances but realise she won't have time to work during term time. We'll pay for travel, phone, family holidays, college supplies and any food at home. How much weekly allowance should we give her for everything else? Any thoughts?

My Dd moved away to uni. She had worked hard to build savings. We would pay for shopping or train fares but she soon found a job to pay for her fun times. I did help out with rent when her SAAS didn't come through before rent was due. But she always paid me back.

My Ds stayed at home but got a job after his first year at college as due to covid there had been nothing. He funds himself completely now in his last year at uni.

I gave £100 pm to my dds until they finished uni. Both worked part time too tho. Plus paid for phone toiletries etc

Ha! Allowance ? My 18 year old DD is living at home and in HE and she has a pt job . I am putting a roof over her head and feeding her. She can pay for the rest . Stop pampering your wean ffs. My children have had wee jobs since they were 15, as have I and worked through their education. It's how working class young people do it. Bloody hell!

I know a teen who recently secured a very competitive degree apprenticeship. One question was re juggling work and study - she had been doing that for a few years so had a solid answer.
If you haven’t the get up and go find a job and to fit in a few hours pt work in addition to studying then it is a red flag for a hiring manager.
There’s lots of pt jobs that would fit with art foundation and be good experience. Museums in our area were looking for very pt casual staff, after school clubs etc.

Just to be clear - we are not "banning" her from working. We just want to give her enough to be able to do her course without worrying about money and jeopardising her studies. It may well be that she can get a job - certainly in the holidays and maybe in term time if she can manage it alongside her course.

My Grandson is 19 and at a small uni. Living at home and working part time in McDonald's. He also has Aspergers.
What's the reason she cannot work?.
At that age she will need a lot of money for socialising at least.

Jeez. My 15yo has been working for a year now as a football referee. Weekends only. Plenty of time for study.

Mine worked from 17, earning £90 a week minimum if they only did one shift. I paid for everything at home, food, toiletries, haircuts (they paid for colour), laptop, phone, subscriptions and maintained/insured/taxed/put petrol in their car. Took them clothes shopping three or four times a year. Paid for train travel/parking for uni.

I rarely handed over cash, they had plenty of their own for going out/lunches/silly stationery/etsy habit.

My dd volunteered then worked from 16, right through school and uni in her chosen field. One day a week at weekends and more in the summer. She had her pick of high valued uni places and She was literally head hunted to her chosen career as she had a proven track record. She had her pick of jobs. Others in her year didn’t and had to start by volunteering etc so they are years behind her.
My son has various medical conditions so full time uni is literally all his health allows him to do. I created a job for him that he can do from home, save some money but more importantly he will have something to put on his CV. He also does some volunteering in his chosen field when well enough.

Your daughter needs to get ahead of the game now as the job market is v competition. As someone else mentioned she could do face painting parties one day at weekend, dog portraits, specialist cards etc ( in whatever is her preferred media) She could well find it helps her in her chosen course too. Its not just about the money, its about life experience and work experience, time management, people skills etc etc etc

@shirtyumbrellatree

It's a shame that you don't think you would have learnt anything working in at Tesco.
My son has learnt so much. The discipline of having to turn up, people skills ( customers and other staff) organisational skills, problem solving, the value of money and how hard you have to work to earn it.
I was able to give him some money towards his first car but he is enormously proud of himself that he contributed to it through his own hard work.
He was also very chuffed to be able to treat me to dinner from his first pay.

None. She's 18

I think most commenters agree that an 18 yo in college would be able to work out part time to fund any recreational activities outside of study. I agree with this and worked in various part time jobs from being 16 to completing university. I feel that balancing work and study is a necessary life skill. I have been a qualified nurse now for 15 years, and still regularly study for my career progression, this is done on top of working full time and raising a young family. Time management is key and an important skill to learn. I wouldn't be giving my 18 year old an allowance.

@Bougis123 my DS1 is going away to uni and we are paying his rent and £500 per month to live on.

If your DC is living at home then you will still be paying for accommodation and food, so I would think about £200pm

I personally would be encouraging her to get a part time job, both mine have had jobs all through uni. Ds has graduated and dd is in year 4 of a masters degree, both just took exam time off their jobs(supportive managers) to concentrate on exams but both worked to live basically.

ds’s now employers said that seeing he could work and graduate uni with a great grade shows he could work under pressure and work as a team but also solo if needed.

For our youngest working has increased her confidence which has been great to see. All her friends from uni work part time jobs during their course.

I do pay for mobile phones and that’s about it.

I’ve read back and can see I’ve pretty much said same line as @ThePassageOfTime about it being a red flag for hiring managers.
Think about what you’ve put she can get a job if she can manage it around art foundation course. Implication being if she doesn’t get a job she can’t manage time well, has low work ethic, is a delicate flower type.
A quick google says it’s 1200 hours for a diploma in art inc self study so only 30 hours a week for 40 weeks.

In that case I'd continue as you did when she did her A levels.

I would say you cover the essentials, so pay for her phone, basic clothing, toiletries, food, transport

Then she works for the extras - going out, designer stuff etc.

She will be disadvantaged when looking for a job after Uni if she has not got a decent amount of work experience.

So many of those competing with her will have, and it makes a massive difference with recruiters!

There's a real divide on MN. If you're kids live at home you're not meant to support them GET A JOB. If they go away to uni of course you must scrimp and save every spare penny so they don't have to work while they study.

Theres a massive difference between working loads of hours to detriment of studies and those who have never worked at all.

How many hours is her course a week? There are very few courses that are so time heavy that working a few hours a week is impossible. Working part time is as important as studying, it gives life skills.

However, I will caveat that by saying that DS1 has been video editing professionally since he was 14 and can earn good money when he has a bit of free time.

On that basis I didn't expect him to go out and work during his A Levels as he had learnt some very important skills such as negotiating contracts and working to deadlines.

DS2 will also be expected to work when he finishes his GCSE's but suspect his will be retail or hospitality.

I do think it is important for kids to do some part time work before they leave home.

Hi - I did an Art Foundation (followed by a BA in Fine Art and then an MFA, so 6 years of art specific education).

I cannot stress how expensive it is going to be to study Art (and for a very small chance at making any of that money back as a professional) because absolutely nothing is supplied and the books are really expensive (and impossible to get required reading through the library because you are competing with all the other art students for a handful of copies).

The better you get at art, the more you spend on high quality materials. It’s so easy to get into massive debts (on top of student loans) because you justify buying expensive material x and expensive tool y because it’s ’for the course’.

There is no point in doing Art Foundation if you don’t intend to apply to uni, so assuming your daughter is at the beginning of what will be at least 4 years of study, she really will benefit enormously from understanding just how many hours of minimum wage job it takes to buy enough clay to complete that sculpture/good quality fabric to make that dress.

Unless you are filthy rich and she’ll be living off a trust fund until her dotage, of course, in which case feel free to indulge her!

Putting one’s studies over working part time can make sense if you are doing a course that will definitely lead to a stable, financially viable career (especially if it’s a course that requires a fixed number of practical hours, eg Nursing) but the vast majority of creatives will have to get a crap part time job after graduation anyway, may as well get used to it.

Better that she does 2-3 shifts a week now and gets a real-world understanding of money before setting off to uni and getting herself in a mess with overspending, especially if she goes to an Art School full of super rich students to keep up with (who pay freelance assistants to help them make and install their degree shows 😬)

If as a company employing a person I saw on the CV no job till past 20 yo, in conjunction with an art degree, I will have (rightly or wrongly) formed an opinion, and unless they prove me very wrong at interview stage, not an opinion that would leave me rushing to employ this person.

When my son was 16-18, at college and living at home, we gave him £50 per week as well as paying for travel, phone, etc. He worked in the holidays.

They don’t even meet criteria to get interview.
We advertised an entry level role in a very competitive field. I was truly gobsmacked how many had degrees, some even masters and not a jot of paid work. The one who had held down a Saturday job as a waitress at a garden centre for 3 years did get an interview as she met criteria.