Oxbridge Rejects 2023 - Come this way and commiserate

[Rejects]

As mentioned on the other thread a safe space for those who'd like a bit of support while not dampening others' moods Sorry that I have gone on a lot about this rejection already on here - it's helped me keep outwardly calm and cheerful when my ds has been very upset.

I am acutely aware in the scheme of things a university rejection is not a huge deal and that amazing lives and outcomes no doubt await all our dc wherever they go, it's just getting through the time between now and A levels and/or offers from other unis arriving, keeping dcs' morale up. Good luck everyone

I was wondering how others were feeling about reapplying?

Had a chat with dd last night who is very deflated about her rejection (mainly because of bffs' success) and very worried now she won't get her second choice Edinburgh. To whoever said Edin's a long shot and everyone should embrace their third choice - yes, we know, please don't come back and repeat it. She really doesn't want to go to her third choice Bristol, which - rightly or wrongly - she thinks is going to be too much of a party university, she's very geeky and studious and that element clearly unnerves her. Please also don't all come on and say Edinburgh is also a party university, I know this may well be true, but it's dd's perception and she can't easily be talked out of it in her current state of mind.

I've said if she doesn't get Edinburgh she should maybe reapply with grades in hand (she's predicted three A stars and already has an EPQ A star). To make matters more complicated she'd also apply for a slightly different subject which she should - in hindsight- have applied to O for, but no details here as too outing. After all the heaviness of the last few years a gap year would be really helpful and could also benefit her in terms of work experience for the career she's interested in which is quite esoteric but also competitive. I said if she went down that path she could always give O another shot with nothing to lose - they did email encouraging her to reapply. If she's offered Edin she could always defer a year anyway, take the gap year and give O a shot on the offchance. But she's dead against that, possibly it would be more than she could stand to be rejected again.

Anyway, that's really me just putting my thoughts down to help me process - but I'd be interested to know if anyone elses' dc were determined to reapply or completely averse to the idea.

Does she realise that she can't hold a deferred place at Edinburgh whilst reapplying? She would need to drop Efinburgh then reapply to both again, with no guarantee that Edinburgh would make a second offer.

I think her reasoning is she'd be fairly confident of an offer from Edinburgh with three A stars actually in hand plus her EPQ, she wouldn't reapply unless she had the very top grades. But if she does get an Edin offer she can defer so long as she doesn't reapply to O, is that correct? That might well be the winner all round.

I wouldn’t advise a gap year with the sole objective of reapplying. I do think Oxbridge is a roll of the dice for all these A star candidates. Certainly at our school we’ve had students accepted and rejected when you would have put money on it being the opposite way round. It’s just a glimpse but their process appears to pay off as in reality all these students are highly capable. I would only be tempted to take gap years to reapply if it was medicine/veterinary or she has contextual flags and takes the gap year to improve test and interview practice, get work experience, do lots of essay comps etc. If it’s a maths based subject I think universities hate gap years as the knowledge is lost, so be cautious there. Also, probably the biggest reason not to do it- if they’re very upset now then you would imagine that upset to be magnified after a gap year if they still don’t get offered.

if I were your DD I would 1. wait on the Edinburgh offer 2. Seriously consider Bristol, this is an amazing university and all of these are top tier institutions. These universities have thousands of students and she will find plenty of groups who are studious. Because of the sheer numbers people are much more likely to meet like minded friends than they ever were at school 3. Promote the fact she can apply to do a post grad at Oxford or Cambridge.

Thank you @NoMoreDrech , just had a chat with my Mum where we pretty much agreed on your pointers so good to have that reinforced. There'll be no more Oxford thinking AT ALL, we'll keep huge fingers crossed for Edin. As I said, I totally hear you re Bristol and know she'd probably love it there in reality - the issue is she went to an open day with a load of kids from school and sort of felt pressured after that to put it on the UCAS but didn't love the vibe, maybe she met someone there she didn't like or similar - I wasn't there so don't know. Then she missed the offer day because it clashed with a test at school or something similar, I forget, so she hasn't had a chance to go back. I'd be interested to hear how other people are thinking re their dc ...

Hi LanadelSlay. Is it a social science or humanities subject your DD is applying for?

If so, a gap year can be a brilliant idea.

They need to go to uni feeling positive, I think, not that they are unsure or compromising. DD was in a similar position to your DD. What you find is, that once they are on the gap year and doing something purposeful (particularly if it's overseas), they gain a totally different perspective anyway. They realise that their other options (even if Oxbridge doesn't work out) are great and they own them positively. It's a different mindset once the pressure is off and they're out of the school bubble. They don't even need to tell anyone they are reapplying.

Have a look at organisations such as Op Raleigh or GVI to get an idea of things she could do in the gap year. When they start at uni after doing that kind of thing, they are significantly more mature and take it all in their stride. This is a massive benefit wherever they end up and, not only that, they have memories and experiences that last a lifetime.

And yes, I do think there is an advantage to reapplying with grades in hand (as long as these are very top grades). It's a steep learning curve first time round, but much easier second time. She will need to do something extra though - like essay competitions - to boost her application. In one of DD's interviews, they asked a lot about her work abroad and essay competitions she had entered / won.

Bear in mind, that if she gets an offer next Jan it will be unconditional, so then she can relax for the rest of the year, knowing what her plans are. By the time August and A-level results roll around, Jan does not seem far away.

A gap year can be amazing, but the key is to have a clear plan.

Thank you @1000decibels - really useful, She applied for English but now would like to combine it with a language, so I think a gap year could be hugely beneficial as she could spend that year immersed in that language, which would be a fab experience, plus to get some work experience in her career field, which is one where you really need to be hands-on-deck and a degree actually won't help at all. I agree, I hate the idea of her going off to uni which - no matter how amazing it may really be - is not a place where she can happily imagine herself.

IMO the ideal solution would be to defer an Edin place (assuming she gets one), take the gap year to boost her all-round confidence and then go ... Personally I'd agree if she has top grades it's worth a shot at O, but I can see in her case rejection two would be too shattering so I am not going to push for that at all, or even mention it. I think her teachers have been a bit vocal about it and that hasn't helped.

Yes a gap year for language immersion is always a good idea regardless.

A friend's DS reapplied (successfully) to Cambridge for English but, in the gap year, he also applied for the Trinity Dublin / Columbia Dual BA which he was just as keen on. Don't know if there is a language option on that course? The first two years are in Dublin, then the second two in NYC.

I think, in reality, if they reapply to Oxbridge they need a 'watertight' application (as far as such a thing is possible)! But if they have a perfect GCSE score and all A stars at A-level achieved, this will immediately present them as in the top half of the cohort already in the uni (in terms of academic profile). If they can then use the extra time to do something else to make their application stand out (preferably a few things) they have a very good chance because they will be seen as a 'safer bet' than those still to take exams.

@LanadelSlay
What is target career? A MFL enhances a cv. English grads can struggle to land top careers if you look at earnings stats.

Also if you add MFL you get year abroad anyway and that can be tailored to a career. A gap year means 5 years snd dd didn’t want that with her training after degree! Too long.

Dd wants an arts career, that's all I'll say, she is adamant for now she is not interested in earning big bucks and more into creativity. This may of course all change when she has to live on zero bucks and another reason why I think she might benefit from a gap year - she's not extravagant in her tastes/demands but she has no concept of budgeting!

She definitely needs a degree as back-up if it all goes wrong and I agree the languages are a booster, but she'll have to get Edin to agree for her to make the switch (Bristol have said she can, no problem). As for five years - I'm an MFL graduate and didn't take a gap year with that reasoning so I understand it but from an old person's perspective another year in the scheme of things is nothing and lots to be gained - certainly the people on my course who took a gap year had a huge head start in terms of fluency. Scottish unis are four-year courses anyway, so anyone who takes a gap year will have the same issue.

Hi @LanadelSlay

My DD is very despondent after her rejection from O following interview. She's predicted 3 A star and A star epq.
She is very studious and worried about the Uni 'party vibe'. But she's lost her study mojo as she can't see the point in A star when her other offers are AAA or below. She doesn't want a GAP year and doesn't want to reapply.

My friends DD studied English at Oxford not so long ago and there was someone on her course who was determined to go. Taken a year out and reapplied with results in hand.

Out of interest did O contact you tonadvise to reapply or was this when you asked for feedback?

I'm really sorry to hear your dd is down as well @SadDD . It's not much fun, is it seeing them so knocked back? I hope she recovers her mojo soon. I know friends' dc who reappplied successfully so it's obviously possible but I know just as many (one friend's ultra-successful dh is one example) who was a double reject. He's obviously got over it but I don't think it's a great idea to pursue. However, would be interested to hear if some dc are deciding to apply again. Oxford said she would be a "very strong contender" (or something like that) if she reapplied when she asked her college for feedback - her marks in various tests and interviews certainly seemed to back that up, but ateod that is no guarantee.

@TizerorFizz Offers do seem much slower in recent years. When DD applied for 2018 entry she had heard from four unis (Durham, Exeter, Bristol and Bath) before Christmas and Oxford in mid Jan. DS applied for 2020 and heard back from all but St Andrew's by Cambridge offer date.

My son didn’t reapply. And is absolutely thriving somewhere else. Out of his year group, around 15 reapplied (‘top’ selective private school). Two were successful. My son didn’t even consider reapplying and I was relieved.

I know from friends last year that Edinburgh (non-science courses), Durham and some St Andrews courses didn’t offer till mid-March to early April.

Interesting stats from your ds school @RecommendedForYou . Really relieved ds won't countenance reapplying, it's bad enough that ds2 might want to do this in a couple of years. I'm sure once offers are in (are not) and people can start imagining a concrete future it will all become much easier

I reapplied to Oxford having been rejected first time around, basically for being immature and a bit of a twat. They urged me to reapply, so I swallowed my pride , worked on calming down a bit and reapplied.

I got in. I took a first in my Moderations, granted a college scholarship as a result, went on to do a second degree.

For me, it was worth it.

All the ‘rejects’ seem to be thriving, many at Bristol, Edinburgh, Imperial and Durham. And they are often with a few school friends so the experience has been largely positive.

I think if students reapply and don’t get in, then it’s important to make sure they don’t regret how they spent their enforced ‘gap year’. The ones who reapplied but have spent time doing something fun now eg diving instructor work have coped better with ‘failure’ than the ones doing stuff like being a teaching assistant at the school they just left!

We’ve had the reapplying conversation, DC is adamant they are reapplying. I’m worried it could be a repeat instance. If they reapply, do they need to do something ‘worthy’ and related to degree eg volunteer overseas, or do Oxbridge equally value gap year applicants who’ve spent 6 months diving and backpacking? Also, is 2 A stars and an A competitive for a reapplication or are 3 A stars basically required?

@GiantHam
As far as I’m aware, and others might correct me, Oxford won’t take any notice of gap year fun things. I would suggest anything a potential student does must enhance the ps in terms of being related to the subject and enhancing their academic profile. I don’t believe Oxford care about anything thing else besides academics.

There are certain things an applicant cannot change but presumably has another go at tests and PS and interview. So enhancing academic study might help.

I still think taking up another offer is better. A star AstarA isn’t unusual elsewhere!

@GiantHam - what is the subject bring reapplied for?
Honestly, if applying from a selective school (independent or grammar, he probably need three A stars to make reapplication worthwhile.
Some 60-70% of students in the uni will have at least three A stars achieved, so by applying with less achieved, they are immediately placing themselves in the lower third (in terms of results).
Having said this, it may be possible if he's applying for less competitive courses (eg. Classics, Anglo-Saxon and Norse, MFL, Music).

I can totally see for you it was worth it, but of course it's a gamble that might not have paid off - then would it have been worth it?

DD is now quite taken with the idea of a gap year but adamant about not reapplying to O, just as well - the thought of dd reapplying next year and then her sister almost certainly applying the following year is more than I can bear!. She'd have to get the Edinburgh offer and then ask to defer which their website says is by no means a given. It's all resting on that as she's announced she doesn't want to go to choices three, four, or five - even though she was thrilled when they made her offers. Such is the teenage brain. She was saying "I'm a failure" but with a giggle, so I think she'll get over this - eventually! @GiantHam Presumably you'd have to tell O you had grand plans in order to boost your application but in reality you could do whatever you liked ... they wouldn't know! You could do two months of something course related and spend the rest of the year as a dive instructor or whatever, it would be fab.

No they won’t know exactly what you do but it’s useful to have done something worthwhile in case they ask in the interview! They will know Dc is not straight from school. Someone who hasn’t bothered to do much is surely not what they would want to see?

My DS was pooled and rejected from Cambridge last year, was predicted the highest marks for his IB subjects, top of his selective private school. He was really disappointed but so many of his other very bright friends were also rejected. He had 3 other offers but had to wait until the end of March to get the Durham offer he wanted. He aced his IBs and is very happy at Durham, working hard but having time to enjoy the full college experience. His grandfather was particularly disappointed and wanted him to re-apply, but he was of the opinion that if they rejected him once they could likely do it again and for his own mental well being he wanted to move on from that.

Your clever kids will undoubtedly thrive wherever they go. My DS is as happy as can be where he is and is has no regrets at all.

Now my DDis debating whether to apply - and so it starts all over again. She says she is applying with the idea that it is the impossible dream!