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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Getting ready to send them off!

325 replies

Maggiethecat · 16/08/2022 12:53

Have been doing lists of things to be done before Dd goes off but must admit there's a bit of burying head in sand going on.

What are you doing to help prepare Dc/yourself ahead of the move (practical/logistics or indeed emotional preparation )

OP posts:
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5
Benjispruce4 · 18/09/2022 15:17

Yes I’ve told her to go to the SU. Society fair on Wednesday. Seems a long way off when you’re lonely.

stilldumdedumming · 18/09/2022 15:21

@Benjispruce4 it's horrible isn't it. For you I mean. I feel my kids hurts and disappointments probably more than they do. 21 years I've been a parent and I don't think I've got any better at this.

Your dd is just going to have to remind herself that absolutely everyone is worried. And that there will be lots of ups and downs for everyone.

My dd found it all full on last night but this morning they all made breakfast together and she's heading out for a bit. Your dd will find her way.

Benjispruce4 · 18/09/2022 15:42

That’s sounds lovely. Just a shame her flat are not social.

stilldumdedumming · 18/09/2022 16:07

It does sound lovely but she still feels
Weird about moving in with strangers. Maybe your dd's flat will become more sociable. The friend and partners cant stay for long. But as you say, it feels like forever when you're lonely. One decent evening he shared cuppa and this but might be almost forgotten.

Benjispruce4 · 18/09/2022 16:11

Thanks @stilldumdedumming thats a nice thought. 🤞🏻

HannahDefoesTrenchcoat · 18/09/2022 16:27

DD was alone in her flat as two people were out with parents and remaining lad is in his room. I suggested she go to a coffee shop we’d seen yesterday and just enjoy the walk and the coffee. Result in picture

Getting ready to send them off!
Benjispruce4 · 18/09/2022 16:37

Wow. Am in awe of your wonderful Dd.

LAS123 · 18/09/2022 16:52

Dropped DD yesterday in London, private halls with lots of students, facilities seem fantastic and social events arranged. She met a girl and went to the pub last night and hoping to go out tonight after the halls pizza and wine event. She has bought freshers events tickets which she is keen for but nobody to go with as yet.

HannahDefoesTrenchcoat · 18/09/2022 16:58

I suggested eating food or at least drinking a cuppa in the kitchen if there is one.
obviously in catered halls you have to meet others at mealtimes so it can be harder initially in self catered if people are feeling anxious.

sammyjoanne · 18/09/2022 18:14

Dropped DD1 off yesterday ready for 3rd year at private halls. We dropped off her stuff from home, and then went to storage facility to collect the rest and dropped those off too. Then a pub lunch followed and a goodbye.
Difference from 3rd year to 1st year, was that in 1st year we helped unpack and set things up (I dont think we wanted to say goodbye lol) . 3rd year we put the boxes in her room and shes getting on with it herself. Told her we will facetime later on this week and I want a 'room tour' of her decorated room. Shes meeting tonight for a health and safety meeting and also a social gathering of new flat/halls mates, so hopefully that goes well.

doubleshotcappuccino · 18/09/2022 19:25

Lovely posts @stilldumdedumming .. singleshot all in .. held it all together but when she walked away she reminded me of when she went to primary school .. because she was holding her fists tight which is what she did when she was nervous.. I had to really try hard to hold it together .. haven't heard from her now so am assuming that is good news .. at some point I have to deal with the bomb site left behind but not tonight .. xx

EntertainingandFactual · 18/09/2022 21:09

It’s tough. Haven’t heard from mine so hope that’s good news and she’s busy…

LAS123 · 18/09/2022 21:28

Ive heard minimal from mine this morning, tried to call early eve but no answer, assuming shes busy! Unsure how much to contact or leave her to it.... she will call when theres a crisis but otherwise not much!

stephaniestephanie · 18/09/2022 22:45

Dropped Ds today, we are just back. It was a lovely day. Smooth journey 2.5 hour drive and well organised drop off slot. His halls are city centre so parking slot was 30 mins. We got everything out and in to his room and largely unpacked in that time. I stayed and finished the job with Ds and dh moved the car to a car park. We then had a lovely wander around the city and had a late lunch before saying goodbye. I was ok, just excited to see him go off happy and looking forward to his new life but my dh was so emotional when we left.

He is not a drinker or clubber (not like his mother) and I hoped that this wouldn't mean he would find it more difficult to bond with his flat mates. Last minute this morning, I found a pack of cards and thought to pack them and this evening he has texted to say he is playing cards with all his new flatmates! One of those moments when I feel like I aced my Mumming today! Grin

stilldumdedumming · 18/09/2022 23:21

@stephaniestephanie lovely update. I love that you aced mumming! Such a rare feeling I find!

Champagneforeveryone · 18/09/2022 23:37

Sporadic messages today, the most recent being that DS and new friends are off clubbing tonight. Their intention is to stay up late enough to "see the queen's funeral" - I imagined watching on the TV, apparently they are intending to stay up and watch the procession in person.

Appears DS is embracing the London student life 😆

EddieHowesBlackandWhiteArmy · 19/09/2022 00:03

Dropped DD off today. She seems to be living her best life already having pre drinks at someone else’s flat with all of her flatmates before heading out clubbing. DH and I had a few wobbly lips on the way home and DS said he felt a bit sad this evening at her not being here. I think we’ll all lean into our state mandated day of sadness tomorrow and take it from there. I’m so pleased she seems to be embracing it all though and getting out there and making friends. Her flatmates seemed lovely at drop off and they’re obviously sticking together for now which is great.

God I miss her already though. I locked the door tonight and didn’t need to take the key out the back of the door as there was no one else to come home late at night. Cue wobbly lip again.

NCTDN · 19/09/2022 08:10

@stephaniestephanie which halls did you say he was in?

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 08:21

@stephaniestephanie i popped cards in too! DD loves a game of Rummy/Rummie(?)

Threelittlelambs · 19/09/2022 09:00

at some point I have to deal with the bomb site left behind but not tonight .. xx

that’s my plan today!

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 09:08

DD left her room in a decent state, unlike DD1 when she went. I did give it a clean and a hoover yesterday to keep busy.

Decorhate · 19/09/2022 09:09

I started spring cleaning ds’s room yesterday also to keep busy!

DeathWinsAGolfish · 19/09/2022 09:11

Also added a pack of UNO cards for DD, but Cards against humanity we're being played by the six that moved in together on Saturday, before heading out.
They spent yesterday morning planning the rest of freshers, and have agreed to do it together, starting with clubbing last night.
But the house feels SO different, DD2s turn next year, several full on sobs from me and I'm not much of a crier, but God I do miss her. Dd2 says just think about the times she was moody, that will sort you out. Grin

Benjispruce4 · 19/09/2022 09:12

Haha very true @DeathWinsAGolfish .

stephaniestephanie · 19/09/2022 12:29

@NCTDN he is at new Bridewell. How is yours settling?

Glad to hear nice stories of them all finding their feet. And I'm sure even those who have not will find their people when their courses start. Well done to them all and to us for getting them there! A lot of seriously strong Mumming being done by us all. 😀