DD fraudulently living in student flat for five months

[ThoseTallTrees]

DD is 22 and started a masters degree but went part time two weeks into the term.

Since then she has effectively been fraudulently living in student accommodation which she is paying for from a legacy from a grandparent. She can’t live there as a part time student and obviously should be paying council tax.

We have repeatedly talked to her about this but she says she wants to stay the whole year and no one will find out - and that a friend of hers is doing the same.

Personally I’m surprised that one of her other friends hasn’t reported her but so far not. It’s been nearly five months.

Is she going to get away with it? If not, I hat might the penalty be?

She has hoarding issues and the debt issues where there before she got this legacy?

I know she is an adult but we all want our kids to be able to thrive in society.

How is her mental health generally? How is the relationship between you all?

Yes she’s always had hoarding issues tbh. Her mental health isn’t great, but she has sought help for it. She’s always had a sort of mindset that everything that happens to her is out of her control and doesn’t take responsibility. It seems quite common with my friends’ kids too tbh - a sort of lack of agency.

I’m not a great mother at all. I love my kids but no, I want them to thrive as adults and I don’t want to spend my life looking after them. Maybe I’m a shit parent. I’m past caring tbh, they are all grown up and I’m trying to work FT and look after my own parents now.

What I was getting at when asking about your relationship was more that you might be able to communicate why you are worried to her do she can take action.

What sort of person would report her! This thread is crazy. It’s a non issue OP.

I highly doubt any of her friends would care that much to report her. I would be surpised ANYONE cared that much to report her.

Bet a lot of uni goers are doing this. If she's willing to take a risk let her. Its not your business

[quote ThoseTallTrees]@ENoeuf halls are only exempt because they only allow full time students to stay there. That’s what I mean by her being fraudulent.[/quote]
But the uni knows she is part time and knows she is in one of their halls, so they’ve probably waived the FT student requirement for her and the others she knows doing the same thing. I think it’s none of your business and you are jumping to conclusions calling it fraud.

@ThoseTallTrees

Any of my adult children or a parent living with us now would be utterly hideous. I’d not even know where they would sit all day. In my bedroom I guess. How is that sustainable?

I do sympathise with this. DP and I are both working from home full time, and facing having to share a room again to do so when our student offspring come home in a few weeks. (I know they might get jobs and be cheerfully handing over their rooms from 8 till 6 daily, buuuuuut...)

What is up with MN today? Is it a full moon. Thread after thread of people who should just mind their own business! She's 22! She's an adult. Let her face the consequences although I don't think she'll make the FBI's most wanted list. Jeezo

Ah I think you're being dramatic OP. Nothing will happen.