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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

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Original poster

university nightmare

80 replies

Strangeways19 · 02/03/2022 19:45

so my dd has gone to uni last September she did a levels and a further college course to help prepare her. Is it normal though for tutors not to show up to tutorials regularly? or the students to be told that they can't access the equipment they were told on intake would be available to them? DD rang me last week in floods of tears because of the way that the technical support had told her to forget doing the work she wants to do until she's in year 3, she pointed out that this very person had told her that she only had to ask and they'd find a space and time to ensure she could make use of the resources (all of which are there for the students anyway!), this has been dragging on for a while now. I have only experienced her being upset like that a few times, meaning she was very upset.
She has been to the course leader who told her that she had to be 'more persistent' when trying to access equipment (this is despite the technical support blocking the access because according to them, she is at the bottom of the food chain, being a 1st year & all..!). I just think it is so unreasonable for her to have to hassle people so that she can access the equipment she came to uni to learn about and try. Surely they should be encouraging her?

I think understandably she is questioning why she is wasting her time at university, when the tutors aren't interested, and she can't access the things she needs in order to do the work she went there to do.
Is this slackness from a uni normal? We are at least half way through the first year and it seems to be getting worse rather than better, she has raised it now so we will see how things go, has anyone else experienced this slackness?!

OP posts:

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 03/03/2022 22:37

@SeasonFinale because she's my DD & because I am a worried parent.
You don't need to judge.

OP posts:

Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 22:40

@User76745333

Why is she focussing in third year work? She needs to remember that she’s a first year, not a phd student.

Which university is it?

It would be nice if more students were committed to doing more advanced studies.

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 03/03/2022 22:40

@SeasonFinale oh & also because we are also stakeholders in paying for this education.

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Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 22:41

[quote Strangeways19]@Thehonestybox you're bang on, she'd on an art course & cannot access her preferred medium, she's massively frustrated & as she was told that she could do ceramics twice which is why she chose that course, she's understandably upset.
She's also had a lot of success selling her stuff online last year & is this is probably a bit of a sting too - I wonder whether part of her is wondering if this course is going to give her what she thought it would - to develop her work[/quote]
Can she not get some of the equipment herself, then combine that with using the art rooms ect at the uni ?

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 03/03/2022 22:45

@User76745333 she's not doing 3rd year work she's doing 1st year work. I'm pretty sure she knows what year she's in. She's not doing science.

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Original poster

Strangeways19 · 03/03/2022 22:51

@Hawkins001 she's got some but she was told she could access the wheel & kiln etc, she can't really get these herself at uni, she's in halls.

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Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 22:56

[quote Strangeways19]@Hawkins001 she's got some but she was told she could access the wheel & kiln etc, she can't really get these herself at uni, she's in halls.

I'm hopeful that she can sort it via student support or they might be able to help her move to a different course next year.
Thank you for your kind thoughts, I also did art years ago & was disappointed, hoped it might have changed but it seems to be worse to be honest.
We know someone who is on another art course & hasn't met their tutor all year.. ![/quote]
Fair point, I forgot about that type of equipment, is their any type of booking system or is it more controlled as to when and how they are used and by who ?

SeasonFinale · 03/03/2022 22:57

[quote Strangeways19]@SeasonFinale oh & also because we are also stakeholders in paying for this education.[/quote]
Whether you are funding her tuition fees is irrelevant. You and indeed she are not "customers" as such. Did she research the course properly if she is now wondering if it is going to give her what she expected in the way of development. I don't think it helps her cause if her parent is trying to interfere with the uni and approaching staff. Indeed I suspect it will have the opposite effect.

Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 22:58

[quote Strangeways19]@Hawkins001 she's got some but she was told she could access the wheel & kiln etc, she can't really get these herself at uni, she's in halls.

I'm hopeful that she can sort it via student support or they might be able to help her move to a different course next year.
Thank you for your kind thoughts, I also did art years ago & was disappointed, hoped it might have changed but it seems to be worse to be honest.
We know someone who is on another art course & hasn't met their tutor all year.. ![/quote]
Back in the day, when I was at university, I used to go to the main art campus section, to sit in the art rooms and do my own projects, one time putting to gather a research journal while enjoying the general atmosphere of the creative aspects of art. Some fond memories.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 03/03/2022 22:58

I do understand why she is upset - I had something similar at university. I was reading music, and did a module that required me to use the recording studio, and it was very difficult to book time in the studio - the final year students were given priority, because they were working towards their final exams, whilst our module was not as important. I suspect that’s what is happening here - all the ceramics resources are being taken up by third years, working towards their finals exhibition - and I can see why that would take priority over first years’ work.

But the flip side is that your dd was told these resources would be available - and presumably she wasn’t told she’d have to wait u til her third year, so at the least, she is owed an explanation and an apology for why these promises are not being honoured.

Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 23:00

@SeasonFinale

Some unis do describe the students as "customers"

SeasonFinale · 03/03/2022 23:03

[quote Hawkins001]@SeasonFinale

Some unis do describe the students as "customers"[/quote]
Which ones?

Hawkins001 · 03/03/2022 23:04

Cannot remember off hand, but a friend at her university, with the printed library receipts of the self service machines used to say customer: x then a list of your borrowed item's

Ruinedwalks · 03/03/2022 23:20

I think my point has been made

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 03/03/2022 23:57

@SeasonFinale I disagree with you completely. She & we are paying for her studies - to learn & expand her knowledge it is a transaction. I don't know what your issue is but your points don't match the circumstances.
And actually you are wrong again, I was not in the wrong to approach student support, they were extremely helpful & welcoming to me. This is normal, what isn't is to judge parents as interfering when really they're just concerned.

it's that stinking attitude of accusing other adults of interference rather than helping that leads to young people feeling isolated & unsupported. Many young people really suffer if they aren't supported. Many adults much older do too. I'm just not willing to sit back & watch her be fobbed off. And I'm not wrong to support my DD. You never stop being a parent - you're coming off as judgemental & with zero empathy. What's your issue with this? Do you work at a uni? Or are you generally just critical

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Original poster

Strangeways19 · 04/03/2022 00:02

@SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius

Thank you I think this may be the issue & thank you for bringing it to my attention. She's still doing loads of other stuff , she's in the studio everyday doing something. Its just sad that she isn't able to develop the skills she wants to

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Thehonestybox · 04/03/2022 01:54

[quote Strangeways19]@Thehonestybox you're bang on, she'd on an art course & cannot access her preferred medium, she's massively frustrated & as she was told that she could do ceramics twice which is why she chose that course, she's understandably upset.
She's also had a lot of success selling her stuff online last year & is this is probably a bit of a sting too - I wonder whether part of her is wondering if this course is going to give her what she thought it would - to develop her work[/quote]
It's a hell of a long way in a pretty boring city (for a student), but Sunderland uni is famous for ceramics. I'm a curator and have come across a few ceramicists who mentioned they studied there, because it's home to the National Glass Centre.

But, she might change her discipline as the years go on? Decorative Arts or Applied Arts degrees usually cover ceramics, but as she's found, the big unis do tend to lure prospective students in with amazing equipment that ends up only being accessible to post-grad students. The tiny amount of contact time is just shocking. I've since worked at 2 russell group unis, and their average contact time is honestly about 5 times as much as I had.

It depends what's more important to her, the uni experience or the education, but if she really wants to learn ceramics, I would at encourage her to have a look at transferring to a smaller uni or more specialised college where the student numbers are smaller.

OnTheHillNotOverIt · 04/03/2022 07:52

It’s sounds really tough OP, both for your daughter who having had some commercial success will now be bitterly disappointed at stalling a bit due to not having access to things she thought were guaranteed and for you, supporting an upset DD. The first year at uni can be bumpy anyway.

I’ll just put in a word for final year students on any course but especially STEM or arts. It’s hard to overstate the impact ox the pandemic on their contact with staff, access to facilities and their opportunities to develop practical skills. The uni are bound to be prioritising the final year students at the moment or they won’t pass because they just couldn’t do everything needed.

I really hope that next year it all settles down. The current final years with their covid blighted uni experiences will have gone and hopefully student life will be much more normal for the year groups behind them.

raspberryjamchicken · 04/03/2022 08:00

It does sound rubbish. If the major part of her degree is ceramics based and she can't access the facilities to make any ceramics then presumably she can't be getting much done. I think she needs to find out what the complaints process is. I also think it's normal for a parent to want to support their child who has only recently left home to do this.

sashagabadon · 04/03/2022 08:02

Nothing wrong with parents advocating for their 18 year olds
Primarily because we’re paying but mostly because they are still children navigating living away from home for the first time ever in most cases.
I’ve just been on at my daughters halls. Not hot water since December, I told dd to chase which she dutifully did for 6 weeks. No progress.
I ring and email threatening to without a percentage of the rent and back date to Jan, fixed same day
Adults take more notice of asults

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 04/03/2022 08:05

@Thehonestybox that's useful info I'll pass that on thank you
@OnTheHillNotOverIt yes I'm realising that this must be the issue - or at least I hope it is, I think she's particularly driven too & feeling frustrated, sort of a perfect storm. Thank you I will talk with her about this I feel like with some advocacy from support services at uni she might be ok. If not it'll be a move next year but we'll see

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RosesAndHellebores · 04/03/2022 08:20

Are you saying she needs the wheel for her assignments? If use is restricted that's wrong. Or are you saying that she wishes to use the wheel to make pieces to sell commercially?

There will be H&S considerations re this sort of equipment and technician cover. It only takes a technician to be on sick leave, staff to be prioritising an end of year show, etc, or up to their arses in marking for things to fray a bit.

Yes, uni fees do make education transactional but that doesn't make it right and it does not help to quote it to staff. It is admirable however that you are paying your dd's uni fees up front to avoid her having a student loan. We did that too but never in a million years would we have brought it up just as we didn't bring up the children's school fees when they were at school.

Sounds like your dd may be better off running her side hussle full-time.

PaulGallico · 04/03/2022 08:32

I also wanted to ask are you saying she needs to access the wheel for her assignments or to make other pieces to develop her skills and possibly sell? If she is having difficulty accessing equipment for her assignments then that is wrong. However it is not a 'nightmare' and you should not be getting involved - let your daughter grow up a bit. If she is capable of successfully selling her art on line then she is capable of accessing a kiln. I also think that your dissatisfaction with your own university experience is clouding your judgement here.

TizerorFizz · 04/03/2022 08:52

Is she wanting to use the equipment to make ceramics to sell? In my limited experience, universities do follow some sort of syllabus for courses. It should be on line so you could check it. If she’s not happy she can change universities.

The contract between a uni and student is just that. The parent isn’t involved. So she needs to negotiate her special request. This appears to be what it is. How was she making ceramics to sell before university? Maybe they schedule use of wheels and kilns for other students and not first years? She just needs to stand back and look at their issues. She isn’t learning anything if it’s not a taught subject. She just seems to want the facilities. What does it say she is learning this year? Also kiln use is expensive. Can she join a ceramics club maybe? Look at alternatives. You and she are not paying for extra kiln use. As an art student she probably won’t pay her loan off anyway. So I would not fret about that.

Original poster

Strangeways19 · 04/03/2022 11:43

@TizerorFizz she was at homes doing the ceramics & we have a kiln, we're miles away. She's not looking at selling her stuff while at uni she just wants to expand her knowledge & skills the ceramics is taught but unfortunately there's no teaching for some reason going on & the technicians are constants putting her off. I think it's reasonable that if you've been told something is available & it isn't well it's not really on. I would be upset. She told the year head that she isn't learning anything at all, she could be doing everything she's doing at home. I would feel sad if a student was saying this to me, and she's not the only one who has said this or feels this way.

And yes they have a kiln which is for all students use. She's paying over £9k a year to be there & access the facilities I don't buy that the kiln is expensive, it's not relevant as she can't access it anyway. And the other facilities aren't available either,

fortunately while what you say might be the case regarding parental involvement it's not like that in reality. The uni was very welcoming to me highlighting an issue, they & we have to be mindful of young people's mental health & as parents or even as people we would have a duty to raise it or at least help introduce her to the relevant department. I wouldn't be comfortable just leaving it even if this wasn't my DD asking for support. Its right that she does the decision making & work to ensure a solution but I'm not really into just leaving her to it in not that kind of parent or person.

And a final point wow, art students wouldn't pay her loan back, how so you know it's a loan & we're not paying for this? And also she was successful before going to uni online selling, some of her stuff even went viral.i have every reason to believe that yes she is likely to be paying it off.
She only went to university to expand on her skills. Hugely disappointing that this is being blocked especially as she's been told she CAN access the facilities & it's expected.

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