Oxbridge aspirants part 4......Hold onto your nerves interviews ahead....!

[TangoWhiskyAlphaTango]

Part 4 - A friendly supportive thread for those with DC applying to Oxbridge, its an arduous process to say the least. I suspect we will need some handholding and alcohol for the couple of weeks ahead as our dc have their interviews. For those still waiting to hear I hope news comes soon

Good luck to your DD @Juja. It’s rotten to fall I’ll on an interview day.

Thanks @Horace123 - much appreciated

Hope she feels better later @juja and best of luck to her.

(My DS spent the day before his interview last week in bed and still felt pretty terrible on the day, so I was glad it was a virtual interview, not a trip to Cambridge!)

Good call Juja. Hope she’s feeling a little better after a sleep.

Good luck @juja and @SandyBayley for s cinf interviews today.

I think DS is in his first one now. He's doing them at school. I so hope it goes well, he's a smashing boy and loves his subjects.

*second

He sounds lovely Viking🤞

Thanks also to @Stockpot @ealingwestmum @VikingNorthUtsire @Panicmode1 - really helps knowing there are others out there having this lived experience....

The key to hold onto is that our lovely, bright, enthusiastic DC will still be lovely, bright and enthusiastic DC whether or not O or C offer them a place. They will be inevitably be shaken by a rejection but they are the same gorgeous people the day before and the day after their results. We need to keep telling them that.

PS Good luck to everyone else whose DC have interviews this week.

I had suspected food poisoning on the day of my French oral exam .

I made the stupid decision to tell the examiner this who proceeded to enquire as to how I was and my symptoms. And then realised I had zero illness and nausea vocabulary up my sleeve...

Only later did I hope I hadn't actually given the examiner a vomiting bug!!

@Storminamu

Any idea why Cambridge takes longer?

Cambridge do the pool process (having other colleges look at applicants) after the New Year, whereas Oxford do it during the main interview period.

On the subject of other colleges looking - the Oxford process means that generally only one or two other colleges will second interview any applicant during the main interview period. In the Cambridge process, if an applicant is pooled any college can look at the applicant in the New Year, and the candidate can then either be made a direct offer or reinterviewed.

The processes work slightly differently, but it isn’t true to say Oxford are better at getting other colleges to take a look. In the pooling process at Cambridge all the colleges looking in the pool will be able to see and offer to any pooled candidate.

DD1 threw up throughout the two days of her interviews for Law, although mercifully not actually in any of them. She was white as a sheet and looked very goth, while not being a goth (she's very dark, with very dark eyes). I think it made the interviews fairly challenging, containing the urge to be sick.

The key to hold onto is that our lovely, bright, enthusiastic DC will still be lovely, bright and enthusiastic DC whether or not O or C offer them a place. They will be inevitably be shaken by a rejection but they are the same gorgeous people the day before and the day after their results. We need to keep telling them that.

I'd strongly suggest that you hold back on saying anything like that at all. Having had multiple rounds of this 'lived experience' (twelve, including a few postgrad apps), the best thing is to not bring up the subject at all unless your DC actively initiate it. Too much emotion will do far more harm that good. Hyping it up makes it into the be all and end all even if your intention is to convey the opposite.

@goodbyestranger

The key to hold onto is that our lovely, bright, enthusiastic DC will still be lovely, bright and enthusiastic DC whether or not O or C offer them a place. They will be inevitably be shaken by a rejection but they are the same gorgeous people the day before and the day after their results. We need to keep telling them that.

I'd strongly suggest that you hold back on saying anything like that at all. Having had multiple rounds of this 'lived experience' (twelve, including a few postgrad apps), the best thing is to not bring up the subject at all unless your DC actively initiate it. Too much emotion will do far more harm that good. Hyping it up makes it into the be all and end all even if your intention is to convey the opposite.

@goodbyestranger what we feel appropriate to say to our DC is very much a personal matter and depends on the child, sorry if I came across too strongly. You may see it as hyping up, it was meant to be affirming of who our DC are irrespective of where they go to University. We also have plenty of 'lived experience' in our family. I feel reassuring her to be confident of herself irrespective of whether offered a place is helpful but of course different approaches are equally valid.

Dog has promised not to bark during DD's and interview...

What a well behaved dog @sandybayley and good luck to your DD.

My dog is lying at the feed of the plumber who has just come to service the boiler...am terrified he's going to trip over her but he insists she's fine!

feet....

I was looking at stats for DD subject of HSPS and I fear she has made a grave mistake by applying to Clare and should have been more tactical. It is one of the most popular colleges with over 80 applicants and only accepts around 6, very few for HSPS across the colleges are from the pool. Why the hell did I not look into this prior to applying?! Other colleges have around 30-40 applying and still admit the same number of applicants so she would have stood a better chance. I know its done now and no point dwelling but still.....!

@SandyBayley What a cutey! I had to lock the cats away for DD interview for fear they would get in on the action

Yes of course it's personal Juja, and of course I realize that. But I'd have thought too much emotional investment in Oxford isn't a great idea whatever your parenting style, and there's a whole shed load of emotional investment implied in what you say everyone needs to say to their DC, which is what you counselled everyone - no nod to differentiation - to do (We need to keep telling them that).

Bold fail there.

I think you're taking what juja said a bit literally there - I did not understand her as meaning that we should be constantly telling them that they're fabulous whatever, only that they should be aware through our love and actions that they are so much more than their UCAS applications. I suspect that Goodbyestranger has a different perspective having had huge amounts of children be successful in this process while the rest of us are just chancing it for a first time.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango - my friend's child applied to same college same subject last year and also felt they should have been more strategic. On the other hand, college DS has applied for had very few applicants every year and then last year it worked out as 10 applicants for each place offered. In other words, I just don't think you can game it. And the admissions site does say it shouldn't make a difference to your chances of acceptance.

In contrast, I feel that DS has been disadvantaged by applying to a college that takes rather than gives to the pool and by only having one interview. It just feels as though he hasn't been able to give it his best shot.

@Valleyofthedollymix thank you for explaining what I meant better than I did - you are spot on with what I intended - it was just a turn of phrase seeking to emphasise that our DC that they are still the same lovely people with plenty of opportunities ahead of them whatever the outcome of the process.

@TangoWhiskyAlphaTango

I was looking at stats for DD subject of HSPS and I fear she has made a grave mistake by applying to Clare and should have been more tactical. It is one of the most popular colleges with over 80 applicants and only accepts around 6, very few for HSPS across the colleges are from the pool. Why the hell did I not look into this prior to applying?! Other colleges have around 30-40 applying and still admit the same number of applicants so she would have stood a better chance. I know its done now and no point dwelling but still.....!

I did look at these acceptance stats but, in the end, DS chose Selwyn over two colleges with slightly better odds . I didn't know that about the pool. Where did you see that info?

I think it has become in the last two years really popular so not sure what to read into the stats. Anyone who gets offered a place for a subject that is so vague in its content has probably done very well in terms of being able to think on their feet!!

We had Clare on long list too. It looks a great choice to me. Fingers very crossed for you. Remember , someone has to get into Clare!

Does anyone know, regarding the pooling process at Cambridge, whether the online interviews are recorded, and accessible to view by other colleges as part of the "fishing out the pool" process?