Is there a general starting uni thread??

[Susiesue61]

I've seen a few threads for specific universities but not a generic one!
DD has gone to JMU in Liverpool and I'm finding it really hard going! Anyone fancy a support thread? Or direct me if there is one already!

[Uniblues]

@doistayordoigo

Uniblues I feel the same way with my DS, as although he's getting on ok with his flatmates they don't really have anything in common - they al do drugs and are party animals with low contact hours on their courses, whereas DS is more low key social and has about 4 lectures a day, so needs to be up earlier. He's got a few "friends" but I don't think he feels they're proper friends yet. I keep reminding myself that it's early days still and proper friendships will take more than a few weeks to cement.

[SS67]

Well, 6 wks in and my DD has managed to change accommodation! Slightly more expensive but she's much happier, in a flat with own ensuite, big kitchen and socialising area with sofas and TV. This was the accommodation she tried to originally get back in January and was told it was all booked. She contacted the Uni housing office and after a couple of viewing she accepted this one gratefully. Another one she looked at stunk of weed, another poor girl was trying to get out of there cos of the problem. It's just luck with accommodation.. Im sure they don't put down on a form whether they prefer a weed smoking flat or not..please tick the box! I would recommend any other students hating their Uni accommodation to try and move if poss cos apparently now's the time some drop out.

[Susiesue61]

How is everyone getting on? DD seems to be more settled, enjoying going out with her flat and has a couple of other friends. Still struggling with playing her sport, not loving it but has met some lovely girls at the socials. She's home for reading week this week 😊

[doistayordoigo]

DS has been home since last Wednesday as they had a wellbeing weekend, DH is just about to drop him off at the station to go back. He's still full of cold and coughing, but otherwise seems happy enough, and is really enjoying the course.

[Howdyc]

Anyone else’s dc stressing about who to live with? Dd seems to think everyone has found their friendship group and is viewing houses while she hasn’t formed a solid group yet. Am trying to reassure her that it isn’t even December yet but she’s panicking.

[ClerkMaxwell]

DD is in Y2 but in halls job and is saying the hype to sign up for next year seems to have started earlier for first years than last year. She's been relating stories of friends who signed up early last year and have all fallen out or who signed up to flat from hell repair wise as they rushed when better flats appeared later. Two close friends didn't sign up early(possible year abroad/hall job) but when these fell thru they found places in the summer which have worked out well. I would inclined to tell your DD to trust her instinct and wait (she could always put a refundable deposit on private halls if she is nervous)

[Notagardener]

Maybe it depends on uni, but I remember panicking myself during dc1 1st term, He didn;t sort anyhting out till summer term (well, his friends rather than lazy dc1).
DC2 saying no one is really looking as far as she knows.

[Susiesue61]

Yes DD's flat have all sorted themselves, apart from DD and one of the boys 😕 Apparently it was discussed in a bit of a panic when DD was home. She's now put a deposit down as one of the boys dropped out but she's feeling a bit rubbish about it. They decided to stay in halls anyway. She's going to decide in the next couple of weeks.

She's also now dropped a bombshell that although she likes her course, she wants to do nursing!! All my fault for being all philosophical when I'd had a drink the other night, because I love my job!! So she's made an appointment with the careers team to discuss. She has made a couple of lovely friends and is enjoying it but still loves to come home every weekend

[doistayordoigo]

DS has been talking about going to look at houses this week, but he is utterly clueless so it should be interesting He's looking with 8 other so looking for a house for 9!

[Dobbyismyabsolutefav]

I think it is really tricky as personally it feels way too early making a commitment with people you have only know 10 weeks. Having said that my DD is viewing a six bed house this week as she feels that lots of groups are making a commitment this side of Christmas.

I would imagine that there might be some swapping of places before the start of year two.

[Howdyc]

Oh dear sounds like people are generally getting things together. Now am fearful that she’s right in that circles have already formed

[doistayordoigo]

@Howdyc Although my DS is looking now his older brother didn't sort anything out until the summer when he was at uni. Admittedly this was because he had no friends, and he ended up taking a single room in a shared house, but when we were looking with him there were still houses coming onto the market with only one room or even no rooms let, so still scope for a group to rent together. And they weren't the dregs either, there were some really nice houses, DS ended up in a house for 7 with a lovely communal kitchen/living room.

[boys3]

DS3 probably needs to be restrained a bit, as very keen to get things sorted - seemingly with several dozen people!!! - at the earliest opportunity. I think a level of sanity has prevailed as he appears not to have jumped into anything yet. Staying in uni halls is also an option, and along with others he registered an interest in that as soon as it opened for next year. The good thing being where he is that there is no requirement to commit, or indeed accept a hall place if offered early next year. But it does keep options open.

The other thing is being at Uni in a really quite small town means you are never going to be far from friends even if you are not living under the same roof. I'm not sure he's quite grasped that yet. Especially as he regularly socialises with people outside his current hall now.

I have seen with DS2, who left his housing choices very late with things working out extremely well each time, that best friends half-way through the first term are not always on such amicable terms six months later, although of course many still are.

So it can sometimes be a decide in haste, repent at leisure

[bottleofbeer]

Oh bless them - and you all. I went to uni as a mature student with the only issue for me being the actual course. I was amazed by all of these young people moving away from home, having to suddenly learn how to live independently, learn how to study at uni level, manage finances and make friends. My own son went to uni three years ago and my word, I found it SO hard. He's my wingman. I also knew he was waiting to go before he told us he was gay (we totally knew haha).

They will be OK, you know? They're brave little warriors x

[doistayordoigo]

DS has broken his arm in two places so is waiting for an operation to put metal plates in Someone challenged him to a race apparently and he fell and went down hard, but was mostly annoyed because he was winning.

[Susiesue61]

Oh no! Poor lad 😕 How is everyone getting on? DD says her flatmates are all ready for going home for Christmas now. They all seem to be getting on, less partying but chatting in the flat and she's been out with the lads a couple of times which she loved 😊
Just needs to apply for her new course now and see what happens 😆

[Susiesue61]

Where abouts is he @doistayordoigo? Are you near enough to help?

[Dobbyismyabsolutefav]

@doistayordoigo Your poor DS I hope the op goes well and is on the mend soon.

[doistayordoigo]

We're about 3 hours away, so not close enough to be useful, but he has friends from his course who are helping him out. Flatmates don't seem to be much use though, still out partying until all hours.

DH is going up tomorrow to take him for a drive through PCR, and the op is hopefully then on Friday.

[boys3]

Hope all the DCs are well. Presumably some already home - the majority of DS3’s peers, bar Oxbridge, all seem to be winding up this week.

Guarantor form arrived in the email today so DS3 has his second year accommodation sorted. Let’s hope they are all still friends when next September arrives.

[Susiesue61]

How's everyone been back at home?. Hope they're all ok. DD only has till April and then first year is done!

[Susiesue61]

Has everyone's DC gone back now? DD went back yesterday, certainly happier than when she started in September. Unfortunately she tells me every detail of her day and it worries me sometimes how little interaction she has with her friends - is this normal do people think? They only go out occasionally and she's given up football as she didn't like it (and still plays for her old team back home!) She seems happy enough

[MarchingFrogs]

DS2 is still at home - they have a couple of weeks of assessments for semester 1, but all his were due in either yesterday (first day of the period) or today. He is meant to be going back with a local friend who drives, although from the 22nd there is an exhibition at the gallery on campus that I would like to go to, so I might offer again to take him.

[doistayordoigo]

Took DS back on Sunday...hopefully he will be okay as his arm is a lot better and he can cope on his own now. He has a few mock exams this week and next, but not sure how that will work as he can't really write, typing is slow and he can't do the practical tasks.

He seemed happy to be going back though.

[Dobbyismyabsolutefav]

My DD went back last weekend as she had a couple of essays to do and she stayed home to do an online exam. Lectures are still f2f which is great and she has been busy with socials this week. A good start to the term and long may it continue.
Like @Susiesue61 my DD does like to give me a round up of her day which has its plus points and negatives at times.

Fingers crossed that all our teenagers keep well this term as this was my biggest stress last term.