Cambridge and Oxford - ongoing chat for those with a student currently studying there

[DadDadDad]

Some of us have found these threads helpful, so I'm starting a new one to take us through

...end-of-year exams (and parties)

...homecoming for the vacation (and hibernation aestivation for this thread?)

...return in the autumn (and more normal college life?)

Posters old and new welcome to join the discussion. Any tips for finding a summer job?

Oh, and for reference, I have a DS just completing his first year in a small humanity in a tiny college.

PMSL @CinnamonJellyBeans. DD's friends clubbed together and bought a table top oven which they used for their "floor-mal" Christmas dinner amongst other things. I doubt very much that it's been PAT tested and it resided in someone's room when not being used. They bought it in their 2nd year and it was used through 3rd & 4th years. I'm pretty sure there was a sandwich toaster in their gyp last year too. I think her college is quite laid back.

At DD's O college the price difference between en suite and shared bathrooms doesn't seem to be as eye-watering as expected, which is something of a relief. Common sense would have her gravitating towards the cheaper end of the market given the choice, but she could afford a slightly higher price for the benefit of privacy, if that was what she was allocated.
It looks as if her room should get hoovered far more often than her bedroom at home. I will have to stress the necessity of leaving enough floor space for a vacuum cleaner to get through. She has a tendency to let papers covered in calculations silt up a bit.

The difference in price between different rooms at dd's college seems to be £1k a term which feels an awful lot!

That's what I was expecting. I think I would cry. I know I would cry.

Hope everyone is enjoying the summer and welcome to all new posters.
There is no range of accommodation at DS college (O) - it's all shared bathrooms and standard price so nothing to worry about there! He found it all very noisy last year and asked for earplugs for Christmas so I would second these, and noise cancelling headphones too.
DS is working his summer job a couple of days a week and we were pleased that he wanted to come on holiday with us this summer so we have all had a break unlike last year. I'm a NHS clinical manager and this looks to be a very difficult autumn with staff shortages so I'm doubly pleased we all managed a holiday!

Good on you husband, you deserve that break.

I didn't get a planned trip to Spain for 2nd year running. But had a few E gland trips away and a couple of days all 4 of us which was special.

Mine stopped family holidays at 20 but DD has promised to take us around Spanish city next summer with our credit note.

DD probs going back early. A good supervisor giving her sessions in September for her project. She chose well.

Hope freshers get rooms they want and parents rest easy!

So sorry HuShan, a very horrible autocorrect. First comment is for you.

At D1's college (O) they had to arrange with their scout what day their room would be cleaned (hoover, bin, clean sink) and make sure they would be out, and nothing left on the floor. The communal bathrooms, showers and kitchen cleaned every day. But they stopped coming into the rooms with covid and so many isolating, and just did the shared areas.

We're taking D1 back in a couple of weeks, she's really looking forward to living out in a shared house this year. It's a good thing she saved money by being at home for Hilary, the rent is more expensive than living in college. The houses seem to get passed on from one group of second years to the next, and they sorted this out early - before Christmas.

DD's (O) college room rate is the same regardless of location or shared bathroom/ensuite. It is very good value and one of the cheapest in Oxford. Rooms normally cleaned weekly, bins emptied daily and bathrooms and communal areas cleaned daily. The fresher's rooms on the main college site are really lovely.
At DS's (C) college, accommodation costs vary by room. The fresher's rooms are modern and of a good standard with en suites. His second year room in the old quad is big (two connecting rooms) but is actually cheaper than his first year room as he will be sharing a bathroom with one other. His college is generally more expensive than DD's (O) college but DS has received various grants and "alumni gifts" in the form of rent discounts, free Formals and Christmas Dinner etc.

@Sunndowne, sadly we haven't booked to go to go abroad this summer. DS (Cambridge) started teaching himself Spanish during the first lockdown when his A Level exams were cancelled. He is very keen to try out his Spanish for real and is hoping he might be able to find a placement next summer where he can combine economics/finance with tennis and speaking Spanish!!

Sounds like a plan spin. My DD's friends are all busy taking up languages as a hobby. One has taught herself Korean! Such impressive young people to study, play and take up other skills at the same time!!

I do miss my abroad holidays. We've had so many cancelled, one flight for the big storm Feb 2020, little did we know what was coming after that!

DD's college (old central O) is really strict about electrical items. Probably with reason, using the kettle and toaster at the same time in their staircase shorted the electrics down one side of the quad. They had to time the use of hair dryers and straighteners.

Communal areas were cleaned daily and normally their rooms were too, but that was discontinued due to Covid.

Room prices - 6 different bands. Very few with en-suite and those were so random that they were not desirable.

Hi all - odd question. Undergraduate gowns Cambridge. Seem to recall in the old days some people had cheap ones that were thin and drapy and others that were polyester and sticky outy and looked like they would be fire retardant. I had the former. Does anyone know if this is still the case? College says Ryder and Amies cheaper than Ede and Ravenscroft. Does anyone know where I can guarantee the cheaper version (not polyester fire retardant!)

@ClarasZoo - because many colleges have their own style of undergraduate gowns, the fabric options can vary by college. There's sometimes a cotton / polyester mix version and a more expensive wool mix version. Once your DC gets there, they could try on some gowns to make sure they're happy with the fabric.

We didn't know different fabrics were a thing. dds college had a welcome event on arrivals day and gowns were sold there. The choice offered was new or second hand.
They were also registered with a local gp service at the same event.

The master (or someone) gave a speech. I'm not always so good with crowded spaces, so dd and I stood by an emergency exit and giggled about me panicking and running out across the forbidden grass with with everyone looking on in horror.
Fortunately I restrained myself.

DS and his friends are hoping there will be a belated matriculation photo for second years, and the opportunity to sign their names in the register.

DD has had first choice accommodation confirmed thankfully and we did a shop yesterday for "essentials" which somehow cost lots!
Her college what's app group seems to consist of a few people talking a lot and most people (including her) saying very little at all!
This might sound like a crazy question but most of the bathrooms (including hers) do not have windows. How on earth does everything not go mouldy?

@Chilldonaldchill
DS has a mini ensuite shower room with no window. The extractor fan activates when the light is on. Even so, I would recommend:

• hanging towels to dry somewhere other than in the bathroom.
• keeping some sort of air freshener / diffuser in there, particularly in the summer.

LOL@ the whatsapp.

DD said the same. A lot of it seemed to be the public and indie school kids scoping each other out and trying to impress each other.

@CinnamonJellyBeans

LOL@ the whatsapp.

DD said the same. A lot of it seemed to be the public and indie school kids scoping each other out and trying to impress each other.

This is actually reassuring to hear as her impression is the same and I was worried she was being hyper-critical. Everyone who she has found on IG went to public school and, despite knowing the statistics, she was starting to feel as though she might feel like an outsider. But I think it might be that they are just more vocal at this stage (I'm not going to say more confident as DD is very confident in herself but just not the sort of person who talks about herself. When the lady in the shop asked where she was going to uni yesterday she was mortified and whispered "Cambridge" so no one else in the queue could hear 😄). I do sort of feel they might have been better off without the what's app groups!

Sorry. Name change fail 🤦‍♂️

After the interview day, DS asked me why some people * were asking everyone they met "What school did you go to?" when the chances of anyone having heard of his (state) school were minimal. He was not used to this question as a form of social networking / finding common ground. When he and I chatted about it, we worked out that his equivalent was asking people "Are you on Discord?" 😂

Before starting, his college Freshers WhatsApp was very active. His subject WhatsApp group had more people in it but was less active.

• He has ended up forming good friendships with some of the confident networkers he first met at interview, so must have found something in common.

Some of the students at DS's college seem very sophisticated and cosmopolitan compared to his background. His school was ethnically diverse but provincial. Many of the students he has met at Cambridge are international, well-travelled and have an innate savoire faire. Those from continental Europe seem to have a particular confidence (and the dress sense to back it up).

@Sideeffectisgratefulchild - DS1 is from an independent school, a big name one. He is actually quite shy and took a while to settle socially at Oxford. He held back on the WhatsApp until he arrived.

The 'which school' question is just an opening question commonly used to try and find something in common (know someone, played you at sport). In my experience it's not very important, just an opening question.

Not all independently educated students are 'confident' but you will hear the ones who are.

DD had an ensuite room in years 1 & 4 where the bathroom had no window. There was an extractor fan and she just kept the door propped open after a shower. Her room was pretty hot so she had the main window open for a lot of the time too.

4 years ago, the meeting stuff was done over Facebook (how times change!) DD knew a few people by name when she went but there was one she was keen to avoid because he was so up himself. He was not quite as bad in real life but it did put her off. What is good though is that people she met in freshers' week are still friends now and she has moved in with some of them as they complete their medic/vet training or PGCE/PhD.

@ClarasZoo DD's college undergraduate gown only comes in one type. She got lots of wear out of it but it has suffered a little from having her graduation hood pinned to it (she was a bit brutal). The graduate gowns come in different materials. I offered to pay for one for her but she's put it on her list of things to sort out once she finishes work in a week or so.

She moved into her house yesterday. It's the first time she has lived away from her college in Cambridge but it is an easy cycle to her department. The house is modern and she has a big ensuite room. The kitchen is decent and there is a lounge too, so it feels quite grown-up. After I left, she retrieved her bike from the college bike shed and it is now chained up in the garden of her house. She has another week of her paid internship then is going on holiday with her boyfriend and his parents for a week. She emailed her PhD supervisor to ask if she should be doing any prep work and the response was to enjoy her summer. She might come back home for a week before she matriculates but nothing has been decided.