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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Starting lectures at uni 2017

947 replies

HSMMaCM · 30/09/2017 20:06

The other thread filled up really quickly, with exciting talk of laundry, mattress toppers and lost property.

Here's where the rest of them settle in, get through freshers and the work gets serious.

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fairyofallthings · 19/10/2017 20:41

DD has got a place on a research programme, she's doing work for it now - mainly data input but she also gets some summer holiday work in a local primary school which she's pleased about. It's obviously in the uni summer holidays and not the school summer holidays so I'm happy as it means she can still come on holiday with us.

That's great advice re the milkround etc, thank you.

TheMightyMing · 19/10/2017 20:54

DS settled well at Uni, seems to be doing a lot of going out with different groups. I've visited every two weeks to date ( only 40 mins away) to tidy, clean , do washing and supply food - Old habits die hard 😄 In my defence he is my OC!

Feel annoyed though I took some frozen food and meals I'd cooked and the bloody freezer went on the blink so I think it was all lost.

I'm praying he's doing some work in between living it up. He's coming home for a few days this week as it's 'reading week'.

GetAHaircutCarl · 20/10/2017 06:56

Whilst I agree that the pressures need mentions are a factor I would also add that I think there are also downward pressures from parents that quickly infect the students.

The idea that you must work like stink at all times and get the best grades possible in all modules is more common and actually quite corrosive IMVHO. Instead of concentrating on settling in, making friends, finding their academic feet etc an increasing number of students are already ramping up the angst about the next stage of their lives. Convincing themselves and others that the sky will fall if they're not on track for a first in freshers week then all is lost.

As a parent I think it's an unhealthy approach and as an academic I think it's counter productive: a degree is a marathon not a sprint. It is a programme of learning that should build successively. It isn't a series of gruelling tests to be aced at all costs.

Auntpetunia2015 · 20/10/2017 07:16

I had a privilege of a phone call from DS last night. We'd not spoken for over a week as his phone mic was playing up and it was like talking to a Dalek. But he's bought himself some new headphones with a mic on so a real live conversation he sounds fine he's loving his course. Made one or two good friends and is now chatting to all his flat mates who just appear to have been shy and scared of the 6ft 3" scouser with the beard who they thought was about 25!! And who they were just hoping would get bored in their flat and move...now they've discovered the vodka drinking loon that is DS they're all happy.
He said course is brilliant his DSA is still going through but he's had a text from student finance to say the rest of his money is going in next week...thank god.

No signs of a part time job but he does need Saturday morning free as they do filming then. So difficult I want him to work but I know he needs to study. Let's see how this term pans out on that.
Anyway we are off to see him tonight taking him for tea as I head to the hills for the weekend. And he's got his dad visiting tomorrow so family overload this weekend.

bigTillyMint · 20/10/2017 08:10

Carl, I like that - the social/growing up/standing on their own feet side is so important. Many of them (my own DC definitely) put themselves under such a lot of pressure to achieve and fear failing academically more than anything.

bigTillyMint · 20/10/2017 08:13

That's great AuntPSmile

I'm not sure DD will get a job - she wants and needs to have enough time to study and socialise, so there isn't much time left! And second years have told her that the work ramps up even more in the second year, so impossible to hold down a job then. But she will have holiday work, so that might be better.

GrumpyOldBag · 20/10/2017 09:12

DS shows no signs of interest in sorting out internships or summer jobs. I thought he had enough on his plate with settling in. Should I be talking to him about this stuff?

I am going to suggest when I see his this weekend, for the first time, that he tries to get a Christmas job at the huge new Tesco opening half a mile away from us shortly ...

JoanBartlett · 20/10/2017 09:28

I post sone this week's "Student Law" supplement from the Times, probably not as exciting as a receipt of a food parcel! It does say 70% who got on to Slaughter and May paid vacation placements in university holidays received training contracts at that firm; but no signs yet of mine thinking about jobs really.

Don't worry Geta about mine - laid back, settling in. I do hope they think about career sooner than when finals loom however.

ErrolTheDragon · 20/10/2017 09:35

I know mine has to do a certain amount of work placements in some of the summer vacs, but they're not the sort of thing we can help with. I think she will probably have to be doing quite a bit of study in the other vacs. If there was anywhere obvious to work nearby that she could reasonably get to independently maybe I'd suggest it, but there isn't that I can think of.

Needmoresleep · 20/10/2017 10:05

Carl, my point is not really about grades, but about engagement. There are lots of opportunities to gain experience and personal skills around subject or other societies. Lots of time to read around your subject, or to attend public (though this might be just a London thing) or parallel lectures, or simply read, go to theatre or whatever. One example is your daughter doing some work for the RSC. It would be a pity if she decided she could not do it because she was too busy growing up.

Yet this seems to be the approach used by others. One of DDs flatmates has announced she won't attend morning lectures because she needs to catch up on sleep following her late nights. Several have expressed surprise that DD has "time" to take part in University sport. Yet sport was part of why DD chose a traditional University. One girl we know has taken a year or so out working as a PR for a smart London nightclub. The mother is not worried. Her daughter is not ready for University, but probably will be one day. Better she earns and gains work experience, than spend a huge amount registering at a University and then not engaging.

In terms of internships, for very competitive careers like law and banking, you probably do need to get your eye on the ball regarding internships quite early. Someone on another thread suggested for law you started with where you want to be, and then work back. So presumably you are aiming for a good internship, the sort that might lead to a training contract, between second and third years, you make sure you are applying with a decent CV. Presumably good first year results and some relevant work experience or volunteering.

Much the same applies to finance type jobs. Larger firms will often take as many as 70% via their internship schemes, and these can be highly competitive with five stage recruitment processes. Only the most technical jobs will be looking for top grades, but I assume all will expect signs of a solid 2.1 plus some roundedness. There are some internships which take students at the end of their first years, but not many. It is worth kids who know what they want to do after University, checking out what might be available and what the application dates are.

Universities may also have talks etc given by potential employers. There were regular "breakfasts" at LSE where you had to wear a suit, bring along a CV and listen to a talk on some aspect of the economy in exchange for a free breakfast. Rumour was that Oxbridge students got dinner! DS invested in a cheap M&S suit but quickly decided, food or no food, that banking was not for him.

Each sector will be different. However engaging fully in your course does no harm. DS is at the point of needing references, and is helped by the fact a very relevant "name" knows who he is and has agreed to write one. When it comes down to it, you need to do well enough at school to keep the doors open for the courses you may want. And you need to do well enough (in a broader sense) at University to keep the doors open for the jobs you may want.

JoanBartlett · 20/10/2017 11:57

Good post from needmore..... trouble is with a lot of them you can lead a horse to water but they don't all drink. Mind you if they choose not to then more fool them. Plenty of other more ambitious students waiting to take the good jobs. (Expecting student law supplement I sent to be put straight in bin.......sadly)

BackforGood · 20/10/2017 12:39

No Grumpy - it isn't 'expected' at all.
Thinking about a job over Christmas isn't a bad idea though.

HSMMaCM · 20/10/2017 12:54

DD is going back to work at Christmas where she did her summer job.

She is taking part in a 3rd year student's research

OP posts:
AshleySilver · 20/10/2017 13:09

One of DDs flatmates has announced she won't attend morning lectures because she needs to catch up on sleep following her late nights.

My dd has a similar flatmate. I guess it's not unusual, especially at this stage. DD has 9 am lectures on 4 mornings a week. She prefers to attend the lectures, thinks it's a more productive use of her time than sleeping Hmm

HSMMaCM · 20/10/2017 13:32

DD said within the first week of lectures, there were people scanning in and then just leaving. Also people scanning their friends in.

Why don't they just go to the lectures!

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rogueantimatter · 20/10/2017 13:46

Ooh scanning in. DS referred to a lecturer being hard of hearing and needing students to repeat their name when he was taking the register. -DS is a bit of a mumbler though

AshleySilver · 20/10/2017 13:51

For dd's course, they make podcasts of lectures and all slides are made available online. Maybe they think they will catch up later.

Or maybe it's a testing the boundaries kind of thing. They do it because they can.

bigTillyMint · 20/10/2017 14:25

One of DDs flatmates has barely been to any lectures by the sound of it. Do you think they get chucked out if their attendance is below a certain limit?

rogueantimatter · 20/10/2017 14:27

Yes I think so.

HeadlessHorsemad · 20/10/2017 14:41

Definitely bTM.

bigTillyMint · 20/10/2017 14:45

Eeek. I wonder if she realises. It sounds like they are all thinking about getting a house together next yearShock

JugglingFromHereToThere · 20/10/2017 15:18

Maybe time for some friends to start going to the lectures by the sound of things!

JoanBartlett · 20/10/2017 15:47

Mine have been to just about all of them although today's text was that he has booked the Easter university ski trip!
I have just sent them special delivery today a 3 year student rail card, day return train tickets to a family event in November (they are kindly coming to) and a new London underground oyster card each with the off peak tube railcard discount applied (I had a very helpful man at the local tube station come out and apply it - it is a complex process apparently).....Today's concierge service is above and beyond the call of duty I suspect.

latedecember1963 · 20/10/2017 16:20

Going to see DS2 for the first time in a month this weekend. It's Mil's birthday on Monday so we're taking her so that she can see where he's living and studying. She had a serious illness when he was a toddler and when he got his A-level results she said she hadn't expected to be around to see him start school, never mind university so it will mean a lot to her and him that she visits.
I hope I recognise him. He doesn't want to do face time or Skype as he doesn't want to feel under surveillance! Have got a double pack of rich tea biscuits (his favourite) ready to take.

HSMMaCM · 20/10/2017 16:21

Joan I was wondering what to send DD and you've just reminded me she hasn't sorted her student rail card yet.

She has however sorted her DSA mentor (and her mother definitely didn't email them to get it sorted). I told her I was very proud of her getting it all organised Grin

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