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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Early days at uni 2017

974 replies

HSMMaCM · 18/09/2017 19:38

How is everyone settling in?

DD starts on Wednesday.

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LaughingLlama · 19/09/2017 10:37

Ive just finished work and the first thing I fid was check my phone. No texts. No messsges. No missed calls.
Im dying to know what shes been upto, today is day , but im trying to hold off contacting her at the moment.
No news is usually good news!

LoveVelo · 19/09/2017 10:54

Really helpful thread (as was the last), my DS doesn't have arrivals day until the 30th so picking up lots of tips - thanks!
Currently sorting logistics of taking two cars, have a hefty bike to take as well and neither car is suitable for a bike rack - but bike can be chucked in back of one car which is a hatchback.
Hope DC's that have been finding it a bit daunting are settling in now, there are some kind and comforting words on here!

HSMMaCM · 19/09/2017 10:56

I'm not expecting DD home before Christmas, but I suspect she might visit a couple of friends.

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unfortunateevents · 19/09/2017 11:30

LoveVelo pleased to hear someone else still has a child at home. DS doesn't go until 26th and I was beginning to feel like he was the last kid ever to leave! I think we are all looking forward to it now - he was on a gap year and has been away several times for different jobs so I'm afraid there are going to be no tears from me when he goes this time! He is also very bored as, although he's been lucky to slot back into one of his part-time jobs since he came home from his travels, it's only a couple of days a week and as most of his friends have already left, far too much time is being spent on Netflix and his phone.

Right now, he is at the GP getting his Meningitis jab, his stuff has been packed for about a week, his contribution to it was several litres of Strongbow and a heap of fancy dress stuff. Priorities, eh?

Auntpetunia2015 · 19/09/2017 11:33

DS has already told me he'll be home mid November to take me to see Justice League. (We love super hero films) but I may need to go before as his nationwide student account hadn't come through before he left. And don't really want to post the cArd.
My backs still bad and I've now been signed off by the dr so feeling very sorry for myself, if it was last week I'd have had DS for company during the day.

LittleHo · 19/09/2017 12:09

Not the last one to go! dd goes on 1st October.

I hope all those who are finding it difficult start enjoying themselves. dd doesn't seem worried and she has stayed away at university with older sisters so she knows what to expect.

Hope your back gets better soon AuntP.

HSMMaCM · 19/09/2017 12:38

DD's boyfriend is here for her last day at home. He took her for her flu jab this morning. He's taking her fridge food shopping this afternoon. Then we're all going for dinner.

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bigTillyMint · 19/09/2017 12:55

Sorry to hear your backs bad AuntP.

Awww HSM!

DD has text me loads and rung already. She is having a ball but also missing us as I knew she would and wanted to know when I will be going to visit. I want to leave it at least 3 weeks - does that sound OK?

HSMMaCM · 19/09/2017 13:11

We've arranged to visit after 2.5 weeks.

DD just hugged me spontaneously. She hasn't done that for years ❤️

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BehindTheBlueDoor · 19/09/2017 13:13

Another 1 October starter here too. He's looking forward to it and isn't planning any home visits until Christmas. Always think Freshers Week is tough, like an odd Club 18-23 holiday! It settles once uni working life starts in earnest. Hope all those already there settle in well.

Eve · 19/09/2017 13:21

impressed by all the matching duvets.. DS is insisting that he takes the old power rangers and spider man duvet sets we still have somewhere!

Horsemad · 19/09/2017 13:23

DS goes on Fri, I'm going to suggest we visit in a month as I'll be having an operation after that and I want to see him before I have it.

yolofish · 19/09/2017 13:29

this time last year we dropped dd1 off for 1st year - she had a horrendous start, 3 weeks post facial surgery and put in a flat where no one else was a 1st year and weren't very nice to boot. she managed to swap after 6 weeks, but it was v traumatic so sympathies to everyone whose DC are struggling.

this time around: dropped dd1 off for 2nd year to flat (still in halls) with group of friends and she is a million times happier.

following day: dropped dd2 off for 1st year. parting was emotional and her boyf, who came with us, cried a lot on the way home. it's harder for him as he's just gone in to y13, so dd2 is off doing the exciting new stuff (even if difficult) while he's back at boring old school.

am coping with empty nest by cleaning!!! (it won't last...)

ErrolTheDragon · 19/09/2017 13:44

Amaliaa - the letters were from DM, not me writing to them!

DD started this morning with 'one week to go' and a hug. She then made sure I knew how to use Facetime (largely so she can see the dog, I think. Fair enough!Grin)

LadyinCement · 19/09/2017 13:45

Dh has of course a Very Important Meeting to attend the day ds starts. So it's me with small car and ds with an awful lot of stuff. I keep hopefully telling him that he won't need much.

New duvets here as I think you'd have to be quite confident and super cool to carry off the Spiderman and Dinosaur duvets. Ds is also looking for a discreet cuddly toy to take...

He is also the Human Pincushion as there is no jab I wouldn't sign him up for... Is Dengue Fever rife in halls of residences? (Semi joking)

Auntpetunia2015 · 19/09/2017 14:38

Laughing at discreet cuddly toy. DS has taken his dipsy, an ancient OshKosh teddy, a retaxes (rhino from Barbar) and a red rat called derek. As well as his Thomas the tank engine beach towel and tigger and pooh hand towels. He's not shy my boy !

HSMMaCM · 19/09/2017 15:20

DD is taking her giant cuddly unicorn. It'll take up half the room Grin

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SecretSquirrils · 19/09/2017 15:31

Hi all. I have one DC just graduated and DC2 just gone off for the second year. Both shy boys.
My experience is that there were always lots of "how do I xxx?" texts in the early days but otherwise if I didn't hear much from them then things were going well. I could always tell when one of them was a bit down because they would message / phone /Skype more.
Both were lucky with flatmates in halls, but for those that aren't they almost always find someone in the flats above and next door.
I think self catered is good for the shy ones because social life is often made around the kitchen.

I agree the alcohol consumption is terrifying. Mine had both had a drink before uni but never to excess. I drilled alcohol safety into them and I recall DS2 spent a whole night in fresher's week taking care of a flatmate. I just hoped that someone would do the same for him if he needed. Someone up thread said they learn their limits in this term, certainly this is true of some. DS2 reckons he over indulged once and has now perfected the optimum amount of vodka Hmm.

Re the empty nest.
It hit me much, much harder when DS2 went as well and the house was truly empty. It felt brutal. Yes I know it's what we want for them and if they are happy it makes it much more bearable but it's still a wrench. It's also not easy to admit in real life I found.
They come back though. The Christmas holidays are long and the summer even longer. You all roll back into the old family rhythm very quickly and then you really appreciate the way the bathroom stays clean

Needmoresleep · 19/09/2017 16:34

DD managed to stuff basic crockery, cutlery, clothes and bedding into a suitcase and make her own way down. I went yesterday with more stuff (though somehow DH managed to pack quite a lot of ds' clothes as both had done a wash before she left) including an ancient dinosaur duvet. Nothing to decorate her room though so it looked very bare. She ended up sticking the tea towel we bought for her on holiday, on the wall. She said others had astonishing amounts of stuff, including a five ft pot plant.

It worked out really well. We had a late lunch, a trip to Waitrose (a treat - I had intended to go to Lidl) to buy cupboard essentials and time spent sorting out her stuff. The accommodation is lovely, as is Bristol. She says her flatmates are nice and do not include the standard gamer, clubber or stoner student stereotypes.

Freshers week is odd. I think DD will be pleased when lectures finally start. She was a bit tired from the night before so had no real desire to go out again that night, so happy to spend time with me instead. She has more introductory stuff (medic vaccinations!) including some quieter SpLD events, but could easily feel isolated. The gap year, plus the fact she has already seen four people she knows from London (none close but all nice) in her halls alone, means she will be fine. But I see why it could be tough for some.

She has received an invitation to Sunday lunch from the Bristol based aunt and uncle of a gap year friend. Dd was really pleased. Perhaps it is the prospect of some good home cooked food.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 19/09/2017 16:59

He ate a frozen waffle because he couldn't be bothered to cook it

MorvahRising · 19/09/2017 17:08

Arghhh! Three days to go before he leaves and DS has just spilt water all over his MacBook, apparently rendering it useless. He has an old one he can take, and has made an appointment to go the Apple Store and have it looked tomorrow, but it may take five days and cost a fortune. He usually fixes other people's laptops for them, but apparently the MacBook needs a special screwdriver to open it up so he can't do it. This is not good for my blood pressure . . . .

Auntpetunia2015 · 19/09/2017 17:18

Arghhh just had a call from DS his computer which blew everything on Sunday and which he'd told me needed a new power supply which I ordered off Amazon and he picked up today and installed is now without an operating system ! Somehow the thing has been wiped during the surge ...so justs as he's due to start and need the thing it's useless...any one any idea how we fix this ?

BestIsWest · 19/09/2017 17:21

It seems there's been a cock up with DS's student loan. Nothing has come through yet. Something to do with him having deferred from last year according to Student Finance. He's been on the phone to them all afternoon.

Rufustherenegadereindeer1 · 19/09/2017 17:22

Well

That puts the frozen waffle debacle inro perspective

EmmaGrundyForPM · 19/09/2017 17:25

DS goes to Nottingham Uni on Saturday. So far he has done no packing whatsoever!

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