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Higher education

Talk to other parents whose children are preparing for university on our Higher Education forum.

Original poster

Uni Freshers parents 2016?

999 replies

granarybeck · 21/08/2016 22:23

hi

I've just been reading recent threads on weekly living costs and what to take to uni and found loads of useful info. I'm certainly finding that there was so much focus on getting the results/not tempting fate that it all feels a bit of a panic now. I have a dd going to warwick and a ds going to bath.

Wondered if there is already a thread for other general tips for those with dd/s starting uni this September?

OP posts:
dottygamekeeper · 16/09/2016 11:46

Likewise hennipenni. My DS went a week ago and he had admitted he was apprehensive, as he has always found new social situations difficult, was anxious about sharing a room, not making friends etc.

A week later I've had a few texts saying how great his flat mates are, how busy they have been out and about at various events, he has volunteered to show prospective students his room at the upcoming open days etc. I have yet to hear much about any work being done, but I guess that's par for the course in Fresher's Week.

I am so relieved, as I had been very worried about how it would all work out. Its very exciting that they have the chance to go off and start building an independent life for themselves.

DD goes next weekend and can't wait - I am just hoping her experience is equally positive.

Peebles1 · 16/09/2016 15:23

Your post gave me a moment too, Napolean! Your DD just sounds so lovely making brownies to share.

DD (3rd and final DC to fly the nest) goes on Sunday. She's out saying final goodbyes to friends today and tonight. Our last night together tomorrow. Must stop thinking of it as our 'last night' - she's only an hour away! Not sure how I'm going to feel, often rubbish at predicting my feelings. Overall delighted for her though. But it's going to be a complete empty nest for me and DH (and on a plus note - a tidy one!).

LIZS · 16/09/2016 15:36

Brownies in the oven here!

Stopyourhavering · 16/09/2016 15:50

LIZS...spooky!!......I just came on here to post that I too had put brownies in oven in preparation for dd2 moving into student house in Manchester on Sunday for her 2nd year!!
she was in Victoria halls in first year and didn't really like it as she was in a flat with 2 boys and another girl ( who quit after 6 weeks!)...so she didn't really get the whole living with mates thing, so Im hoping she has more fun this year.....still don't think she's got the hang of cooking for herself yet though (takeaways seemed to feature quite regularly in her meals...as well as pasta and cheese- the cookbook I gave her for freshers came back unopened!!)

MyVisionsComeFromSoup · 16/09/2016 17:41

car pretty much packed in preparation for tomorrow Sad. I'm now madly googlemap-ing to check where the nearest big supermarket to do an initial shop is (the local/express places do tend to be more expensive, and Aldi/Lidl don't always have what you need), and seeing if there's anywhere nearby to a reasonable lunch.

DD is sticking her head in the sand about going off to uni, and refusing to pack the last bits and pieces as that will mean it is actually happening. I'm pretending that she's only off for a few days holiday, till I get used to the idea.

But, her flatmates sound really nice (they have a FB chat going) and Birmingham have matched party people with other party people and early risers (aka non-party peopleWink) with other early risers, so it does seem that as a flat group they'll be at the pizza and film night and quiz night rather than clubbing seven nights on the trot (which DD is very relieved about).

I feel sorriest for DD3 though, she'll have the full benefit of all my attention now that both her sisters aren't at home any more Wink.

Buxtonstill · 16/09/2016 18:32

well

blueskyinmarch · 16/09/2016 20:14

We are on our way and have stopped for the night halfway through he 400 mile trek. There is a lovingly baked chocolate cake wrapped up in the boot of the car. If she can't make friends she can buy them with the offer of cake!

GasLightShining · 16/09/2016 20:44

I am not sure anyone will be impressed with DS's Tesco Value biscuits but that's what he likes. There is a couple of boxes of Corona to be squashed into the car.

Everything ready to load into the car tomorrow morning. Hope we have remembered everything. Box of tissues ready.

Hope it all goes well for everyone going tomorrow

Original poster
granarybeck · 16/09/2016 23:20

Good luck everyone dropping off this weekend! I'm finding the waiting/preparing feels like we just need to get there now! One week to go (and a lot of packing to do! )

OP posts:
jaxxyj · 16/09/2016 23:22

We are in a travelodge having driven down from Newcastle to Kingston upon Thames. Well that was an experience I can tell you! DS too excited to sleep but I am cream crackered and we have a big day tomorrow.

OhFuds · 16/09/2016 23:59

Good luck everyone!

user1471465062 · 17/09/2016 00:04

Good luck everyone. Dropping DS2 off tomorrow, he came and gave me a cuddle. It made me cry when he said I love you and going to miss you.

Dunlurking · 17/09/2016 07:43

Thinking of you all for this weekend. Flowers Hope it goes well and you can keep the smiles up in front of your dcs.

This thread (and the empty nester one) makes me cry, anticipating our turn 2 weeks today Sad

UKcanuck · 17/09/2016 08:56

Good luck to everyone for this weekend - take tissues!

DD just finishing Freshers' Week at Sussex and seems to have gone brilliantly, has done lots with flat mates and others in the building, all seems to have settled in well.

Now need to see how the "settling down to work on course" part goes... Smile

hellsbells99 · 17/09/2016 09:06

We moved DD1s stuff in yesterday. We are now filling the car with DD2's stuff and will be dropping DD1 back off on our return journey from dropping off DD2. I think I am already exhausted!
DD1's friends are similar with 1 sister being taken today and 1 tomorrow.
Good luck for those that are going this weekend.
Glad to hear those already there are all fine Smile

marbeth · 17/09/2016 09:14

Good luck everyone dropping off today. Ds went last week. House seems empty. Seems to have enjoyed freshers. Although flat mates don't go out and they are all girls.

Northernlurker · 17/09/2016 09:46

Good luck all. We dropped dd off two weeks ago, feels like months!

Chuckie88 · 17/09/2016 11:37

Moving dd into halls now. It's so hard to keep standing back and not offer "advice" but trying my best. We'll take her food shopping soon and then leave. No doubt she'll be relieved and start chatting with some of the others in her flat. All of them are looking a bit rabbit in headlights but will cone out of their shells when parents leave.

Squirrills · 17/09/2016 13:08

Flowers and Wine to everyone dropping off today.
I confess I crumbled for the first time yesterday after reading Canyouforgiveher's post on this thread.
I have never shown anything but happy smiles when waving off DS1 and am determined to do the same for DS2.
A week today.

On a lighter note I have told DS that if he doesn't clear the piles of clothes from his floordrobe he will have a suitcase packed with dirty laundry to take to uni Wink

NapoleonsNose · 17/09/2016 14:16

Dropped DD off yesterday and once we'd help unpack and taken her shopping to get some food we left her to it. I did have a few tears but nothing too embarrassing for her! Forgot the lightbulbs for her desk lamp so her and another girl went into town this morning to buy some as well as fancy dress for next week. She did have to text me to ask which ones she needed to buy though! I'm resisting the urge to text and find out how its going with her flatmates and social stuff.

silverbeetle · 17/09/2016 15:49

Just dropped DD1 off in London this morning after one false start because she forgot some important paperwork and we had to go home again - just typical! All went OK, didn't cry just made myself busy while I was there by making up her bed and getting the room looking cosy and thinking 'Oh my god where is she going to put all this stuff?' Not that she was at all worried I might add. She was the only one that had arrived in her flat so it was very quiet, expect that will change. One potential disaster - No toaster! How will she survive without toast? She's hoping one of her flat mates might bring one, if not I expect we'll be buying one.

She's only an hour and a half from home and as I work in London fairly frequently will have the opportunity to see her/ give her money (assuming she's not too busy of course).

Now I'm home it does feel a little weird as she's not hanging around in the kitchen eating toast with one hand and texting with the other but it's a good weird. The strangest thing is looking in her bedroom and it being so tidy - well I think she packed almost her entire possessions including my new gym kit which fell out of her bag on the way to her room - grrr. Now that's one thing I won't miss, just wondering what else of mine she's 'borrowed'. :)

I'm exhausted now, it seems like it has been a long and arduous journey at times but am so proud of her and pleased that she's where she wanted to be. I'm also so glad I bit my tongue and let her make the decision on uni, rather than go somewhere just to please us. Just hopes she works hard and enjoys the experience - Oh to be young again Wink

Good luck to everyone and their DC's as we all start a new chapter.

LIZS · 17/09/2016 17:59

Just back. Not sure Toy Story 3 is the best idea! Ds has promised to FaceTime tomorrow.

homebythesea · 17/09/2016 18:05

We have an interminable week to go- all DS close friends are gone and have been regaling him with tales of Freshers antics (good and bad) which I think has only made him more apprehensive ("what if I don't get on with people / lose my key/ get chucked out of a nightclub / puke in my bed / don't like the food"etc etc etc. - all actual examples)

He's trying to keep busy, has a very active WhatsApp group for his course and his Hall which is great, but it would be so much better if he could just go now!!

blueskyinmarch · 17/09/2016 20:21

We have arrived in Bristol. Went for dinner In pizza Express and spotted several parent and student combo's. We drop DD at her halls tomorrow. She is very ready and looking forward to making new friends. I feel a little sad but excited for her.

EllenJanethickerknickers · 17/09/2016 20:31

Flowers to all you brave parents!

DS1 still has 2 weeks to go. I think Warwick must be one of the last to start. He's just finished his summer job for a well deserved fortnight of lie-ins and dossing about after having worked 9-5 since July 11th. He had a leaving do yesterday, came home at 1.30am and was promptly sick in the toilet. Starting student style life early. Hmm

We had a bit of a surprise today. My DS2 is eligible for a small bursary from his college so I suddenly thought I'd see if Warwick did any sort of bursary. I googled Warwick bursary and it looked as if he would qualify, but he had to have applied through student finance England. We had a look to see if we could find out what he needed to do on the website, and couldn't really work it out. So he phoned their helpline. After 10 minutes of press 1 for option a etc, they needed his customer reference number. He quickly opened one of the PDF letters from the website, found the reference number and started entering it on the phone keypad.

I was looking over his shoulder and noticed that the letter he'd opened mentioned 'bursary.' Quickly hung up and enlarged the PDF. It was confirmation that he would receive a bursary of £2000 from Warwick sent by student finance England, dated April! Neither of us had seen this letter before and he can't find an email about it. If we hadn't checked today the first he would have known would have been receiving the first instalment in October.

He hadn't actually knowingly applied for this bursary, it has been automatically granted apparently, because we agreed to share my financial information with the University back in April when he first applied for finance. Still slightly stunned! Free money, rather more than I received as a grant back in the 1980s!