EMPTY NEST SUPPORT THREAD-Part 2

[MissMarplesBloomers]

Part one lasted seven years! Thanks RustyBear for the great idea.

I have one DD off this year and another one starting Sixth form so will be here for a few years!

So how are all the DC's getting on with the lists/packing etc?

Dd home, an hour from halls to home on the train and dads taxi from the station here. She seems on good form and very happy to see the cat. Her lectures start on Monday, 6-8pm!!

If she gets a couple of good nights sleep it will help hugely.

Yes I do think freshers week could be much improved, but it was much the same in 1982 when I went.

so sorry notsoskinny - how is he now?

dd still good, partying a LOT, so will crash soon am sure, but we 7 hours away so can't do anything..

DD3 sounded tired on the phone yesterday. She's been out a few times this week and isn't used to it. She also said she had been kept awake by people from other flats coming back late. She's had some lectures but said they were a bit boring as they are going over stuff that she's already done. I told her that was better than starting off with hard stuff and rhat some of the students might not have done the stuff she had. I think she thought she would be taught harder stuff straight away she doesn't like things being too easy Other than that I think she's still happy. MABs your DD is even further away it's hard when you can't just go up and visit.

Thanks MABS, he'll be discharged today so we're going to drive over for him. He wants to go back to his flat as he doesn't want to miss any lectures with it being the start of term but mum is insisting we bring him home - DH will see how he is when we get there and speak to the doctor and take the fall out from mum if doc supports DSS.

Glad he's being discharged today. DD3 had her appendix out last October. She wanted to go back to college but was up to doing anything the first week after she came out of hospital.

That should have said wasn't up to doing anything. Apparently it takes at least a week for the anthesetic to clear your system.

Notsoskinny yes the anaesthetic will be in his system for a lot longer than you'd think. A week for the initial woozisnes then a few more weeks before feeling 100% poor chap.

I would have thought a week off would be sensible, its still early so he won't miss too much, as loing as his tutor knows they can organise someone to take copies of their notes for him & make a list of things they should have read so he can catch up. If he rushes back too soon he could well end up taking much longer to recover & be ill again further into the year when they are right into it.

wooziness not woozisnes.....!!!!

We took DS to Cambridge this morning. We were met by a lovely boy who had just arrived and was obviously lonely and nervous, and informed us that the flat was going to be shared by another boy and two girls. So I have high hopes of a cleaning and shopping rota.

I had real trouble not crying, was feeling very proud of myself but miserable and trying to hide it, then as DH was pinning timetables on to the wall board I felt a hand creep into mine and squeeze it... So I knew I had to stay strong for his sake. That has to be the first time he has willingly held my hand apart from a very rare event when we witnessed a car pile up 7 yrs ago!!!

Stopped off on the way home and ate large slice of cake and drank large glass of wine. Came home and saw state of his bedroom Went outside, stroked rabbit and informed her that she is an orphan. Used rabbit as hanky.

Made, I've already used the cat as a hanky, and am about to go and quietly sob into my horse's neck - he's very understanding and doesn't mind copious amounts of weeping, in fact he's getting used to it! DT1 dropped off today and I can't stop worrying, he seemed more lost and lonely than DT2 who went on Thursday. He's in a studio rather than a flat and I'm worried that he'll be isolated, but hopefully am flapping unnecessarily. I am really hating this week.

My dd is off tomorrow. We are taking her - am not looking forward to the last goodbye. Have asked her to Skype me how her room looks - think it helps if you can visualise them there. Thank God for Skype and mobiles. Just hope she is lucky in her housemates. This thread is such a help. All of you know how it feels. Am tired and am going to have a quiet week next week to process it all. Dd still can't believe she is really going - not sure I can either!

Sizewise a horse would be far more useful than Bunny. I was trying to remember what I missed when I left home and the answer sadly was, not much at all. So I was wondering what DS would miss most - us, or his musicroom! Not Bunny, she has scarcely had a lookin this summer.

DSS being kept in for another night, helpful DSD has reminded him his first year doesn't count towards his degree so he's no longer worried about what he misses except the rest of freshers and being unable to train or try out for the football teams for a couple of weeks!

Made, I ventured into DD's room but I'm not brave enough to tackle it for fear of what I might find - DH thinks we should get a skip then go in with the pressure washer! How can someone who always looks immaculate live in a hovel?

Oh dear , am I the only one that hasn't wept ?

I miss DS's presence around the house , but I am quite content that he's not here ( he's 4 hours away in London )
I'm proud of him , and of DH and I for making sure he made the grade .

I must say our shopping bill has come down tremendously ( might have something to do with it being no alcohol September )

He thinks I'm being a bit needy and stalkerish as I try and phone him everyday , going to leave it for a couple of days and see if he phones us !

We have just come back from a short break away to celebrate the fact we can now the nest is empty :)

DS is REALLY enjoying himself, partying every night so hopefully this will calm down once freshers ends and lectures start next week. His flat is the meeting place for lots of others before they hit the town and his George Foreman Grill is working overtime on the toasties when they all return at silly oclock.

DD has also invited herself home or a weekend soon as her DH will be on a stag weekend, so that will be lovely :)

Well I've now managed to do a bit in DD3's room without bursting into tears. I've only been phoning her every couple of days as she didn't want me to phone everyday. She actually went to the laundry room and did some washing yesterday. DH and I. were amazed as this is someone who doesn''t bring dirty washing down for weeks and that's only when she's been nagged about it.

Mumeee my dd did washing too. I was a bit gobsmacked until she mentioned she had been to some sort of event that involved painting herself green . Can only assume that washing was required to remove the green-ness!

DD1 went to University of East Anglia yesterday. And texted to say she was out partying already. It's sooooooo QUIET here without her. DD2 didn't get back from her boyfriend's until late last night.

It's all so scary tidy and lonely.

DD1 went last week. I do miss her a lot but no danger of the house being tidy as DD2 is still here!
She is having a good time I think. I spoke to her yesterday and I've had a few texts. I'm trying to avoid contacting her too much. She cooked for her flat mates last night. She did have to phone me for cooking tips though

DS skyped me this morning, not because he misses me but because he didn't take enough shirts to supply his new partying lifestyle. Suggesting he washes them more frequently fell on deaf ears, he took so few because HE couldn't be arsed to iron them, but now he realises that multi-levelled student haunts get very, very hot. So it's me and a pile of shirts off to the PO tomorrow. I packed a container of spag bol for him for today, but he says he won't need it, their whole wing is off to a carnival-style BBQ. Am starting to feel very jealous. But as I have now had two phonecalls AND he has condescended to talk to me on fb, I am feeling far happier. Even though he has already locked himself out of his room and had to go and find a warden to let him back in. He says he has has met loads of nice people - but will he recognise them when he is sober? I doubt it.

dd locked herself out too! no washing doing there either, apparently she sprayed stuff with febreze!!!

DD1 has just rung.

She forgot her running shoes and her wellies. Will I post them?

She has a hangover. Hahahah.

that will cost a fortune Sarahsratton I guess :(

Lovely to hear everyone's news.

We did the drop off today. Left home at 11.15, stopped at Tesco to buy stuff for his fridge and freezer (and a box of Heros, and a crate of cider...). Got to his halls, checked in, a hoard of helpers arrived to help us carry all his stuff to his room. Emptied a few boxes and the suitcase to bring home. Drove home. Back indoors by 1.30. I DIDN'T EVEN CRY

Dd is home or the weekend. She has a stinking cold and looks pretty ill. She had been planning to go back for a pub crawl, foam party event tonight but has decided to stay here an extra night. The change in her mood since Friday had made me feel that when she goes back in the morning she will be feeling much more positive and ready to get stuck in.

She has an interview for a part time job tomorrow and lectures start. Hopefully the madness of freshers will level off and she will start to relax.

Strangely, although she has had a rough week I haven't cried and have managed to clean her room without being upset. To be honest though, she has so much stuff that it doesn't look empty at all and she still has loads of clothes here.

So after a dodgy start I am optimistic that things are looking up.