ADD

[mumeeee]

Hi DD2 thinks she might have ADD. She is in her final year at uni. She spoke to me today and told me she googled it and she has all the symptoms. She's finding it difficult to focus on in lectures and had a mountain of work to to which she is finding difficult to get on with. She also finds it difficult to sleep and is impatient as well as other things. She had a part time job which doesn't help matters. But as it's in a theme park will be finishing at the end of this month. I've told het to have a word with her tutor. Bur how likely do you think she does have ADD or is it just the pressure of all the work? .

Sounds like stress and pressure to me; I don't know about ADD but I'd suggest she try a meditation and or yoga class to feel a bit more 'grounded' and timetable her studies and essay writing so she has time on, and time off work. As you say there's prob lots of final yr students going through the same challenges your DD is facing, and feeling a bit panicked at the enormity of what lies ahead.

I think you are probably right cureal. It is stress and pressure. I'm not sure what made her google the symptoms but her younger sister had dyspraxia and she knows someone with ADHD. Part of the problem is that she us a bit of a perfectionist and wants to get things perfect before she gives them in. She is also a bit impatient so gets cross with her self when things don't go right. She is teaching herself the guitar which takes the focus off of uni work. She was going to look fir another job after this one finishes but thinks she might just concentrate on uni instead. It doesn't help that at the moment she's either at uni or working,

Poor thing, it must be tough. Even if she does think she has ADD; where does diagnosing it lead? If she feels able to manage her obligations, with your help which must be a big support, that's the main thing, even if it does seem a bit much at present.
Bear in mind I know nix about ADD so if she DOES have it and it needs treatment after diagnosis - please ignore all I've said..! Lots of luck to her.

Well she must be worried to actually ask me wether I think she had it. She doesn't often ask me stuff. But I think the added pressure is that her older sister got a first at uni. We just want her to do a best. She's said she's aiming for a 2:1. I think if she speaks to her personal tutor at uni about how. she's feeling they might be able to help her. I also suggested she talked to a doctor. I'll just have to wait and see if she listens to my advice. I did tell her what you suggested to try and split her work in to small chunks. Thanks for listening and fir your suggestions.

Well after a nights sleep I'm beginning to think more that it is as cureail said that's it's more likely to be stress rather than ADD. The thing is does anybody else have any more suggestions/advice I can give her. She's 3 hours drive away and at the moment we are not able to visit her. So all mine and DH's support had to be done from a distance. You think your DCC's are growing up and don't need you anymore. Then suddenly they want their Mum and Dad.

Dear mumee I dont think your DD has ADD because it would have been manifest before now and you would have noticed when she was at home.

However she does sound stressed. I don't want to sound prissy or preachy but the usual common sense things apply: get enough sleep, regular exercise and a healthy diet, manage time between academia, money earning and leisure sensibly, set achievable goals, stay positive, get essays and coursework in on time, give lots of praise.

If necessary the uni will have an academic support unit which can give advice on time management and study skills but your DD has got to year 3 so she is probably really good at study and hopefully just needs reassurance and tlc. What I am saying seems so obvious I feel silly saying it but hope she does well - perhaps send her a nice food parcel.

Thank you funnyperson. She has always been a bit. last minute with work but always hands it in on time. Also when she was younger she was a bit distracted ,unorganised and often late getting to places. When she asked me if I thought she had ADD I dud worry that perhaps we hadn't picked things up when she as younger. Her eating and sleeping is a bit erratic which doesn't help. She seemed to become nocturnal at 18 but she is now going to bed earlier her job helped with this.

It sounds as though she's doing really well especially managing to fit in a job as well; she might feel a lot better in herself when she doesn't have that taking up her energy any more. I'd also say, though you're probably doing it anyway, let her talk to you and DH as much as she can about how she's feeling; a problem shared and all that; it's prob a great relief for her to offload her worries to you both. Maybe her sis could also empathise and give her some tips for getting through it. Uni is a tough old time (especially when you know you're meant to be having the time of your life) and I hope she starts feeling more positive about things when she has more time from her job ending.

Cureail I think she will be bit more positive when her job ends. Her sister only lives much nearer to her than we do it's about a 45 minute bus ride away, They get on well so I might suggest she has a word with het or even just meet up for some fun time together. DD2 isn't very talkative but she often texts me and will sometimes phone. I have texted her today and told her that DH and I are happy to talk to her and support her whenever she wants to. Thank you both for all your help.

Well DD1 has got a meeting with her Tutor on Monday. It's mainly to do with her dissertation but she says she can also talk to him about other stuff. So she'l bring up her worries then. She seems calmer now although very tired after work let night. She is keeping me informed by text.[