Parent of oxbridge candidate-peersupportneeded

[funnyperson]

OK so my DD is applying to Oxford for entry in 2011 and has a 75% chance of getting rejected so I am told by the Oxford website so I reckon a new thread would be helpful for us parents who may end up with joy or grief but in any event need to keep sane enough to support our loved ones. Any tips on maximising chances of success at this stage?

Good luck to those who are waiting and wishing you good news when it comes and happy times with your family.
DD is stuck in the snow at her dads house and cant get here. Our celebrations have been over the phone and by facebook so far. Typical. But I feel for mumoverseas whose children have been stuck at Heathrow because their flight home has been cancelled because of the snow.
Just a little more while and I will see DD again and hug her loads, and hopefully the same for mumoverseas.
Just a little more time and you all will receive your news too.
Fingers crossed.

congratulations to DD (& you), funnyp - that's brilliant news! Like fififi I thought your account of DD's interview sounded very positive

DS2 hasn't heard anything either, om, fififi & Rrocks. Maybe they haven't yet decided on the last few places for PPE?

Congrats to funnyDD. Brilliant news that she got into her first choice of college.

Betelguese you are spot on- our children are special whatever they are. Absolutely fundamental.

The news has been sinking in all day -DD and I and relatives have talked on the phone because of being separated by snow. Because we never took this for granted it is all new to us and also because we don't have a neat nuclear family and have had a difficult year or so there has been a lot to share and talk over.

Happiness is quite a strange thing to experience. When I see her tomorrow we will chat more, and as I know she has already put together a revision timetable, hopefully we will be relaxing and, yes, celebrating a bit because to get an offer from Wadham, which she loved, is amazing. We have been sharing what we think of it, how hard it might be to get the grades, the people who helped, the work she did, the people she knows who are already in Oxford, the people she met whilst up there, the school friends she might leave behind or will see again there- I suppose debriefing in a way, and thinking about next steps. It became clear that Oxford provides an outstanding education but demands serious commitment in return. We have learned such a lot in this run up and it is nice just to have the time to reflect. Thank you all for the good wishes and wishing you all the very best.
I am maxed out on electronic communication and will return after Christmas to read all the posts. Seasons greetings to all!

Any news from Hollyififi/Ponders/notanotter/peternas/anyone? Has the postman got through? FIngers crossed.
Here is something that might cheer people up whilst waiting -it is a Bollywood version of jingle bells.

Just had text from son to say he's not got in for PPE. Am with my mother who is unwell so feel awful that I can't give him a big hug. He seems Ok about it, from our brief phone call, says he felt the interviews hadn't gone well, it all seemed flat rather than difficult or challenging, and so he says he isn't surprised and had prepared himself for a no letter.

Doesn't stop his mum crying though. Thank goodness I'll have a drive home later to prepare myself and we're all at the theatre tonight for distraction....he's probably clevererthan DD who is at another college in Oxford but much quietr and more reserved and takes a while to warm up in converstaions with people he doesn't know. Ah well, you have to trust the admissions process, it possibly wasn't the right place for him...

He loves the mix of subjects though so really hope he gets an offer now ( and soon)from either of his second choices. He's got his 3A* A levels in his hand so fingers crossed...

Good luck to everyone else.

Am so sad for him...

Oh, sorry to hear that holly :( But you're right, Oxford probably just isn't the place for him. Oxbridge isn't the be all and end all, he'll be absolutely fine and perfectly happy elsewhere I'm sure. Good luck for another offer!

oh, fififi, I am sorry! DS2 still hasn't heard - at least he hasn't said anything this morning, & he's gone out now. (But like your DS he found the interviews flat & not challenging so I'm pretty sure he'll be rejected too.)

Good luck with all his other choices

Hollyandififi sorry to hear your news. Lots of Hugs to you and to your clever DS as I know you and he will be feeling disappointed.
You mentioned the interview went a bit flat and not very challenging and this is the experience my DS had last year so one wonders whether to a certain extent minds are made up beforehand- not before the invitation (which depends on the TSA which your DS must have done fine in) but before the interview itself.
Painful though it is, perhaps you could ask DS to let his school know straight away- they may be able to find out whether he is on a reserve list. (I am no expert but some faculties do keep a reserve list). Although this will sound cliched to you at the moment it is true that DC almost always land on their feet in the place they eventually go.
Keep us posted.

Remain totally in awe of Betelguese - your resourcefulness is phenomenal.

holly sorry to hear the news. I always think that it is mean to give the results just days before Christmas.

Any news from Hollyififi/Ponders/notanotter/peternas/anyone? Has the postman got through? FIngers crossed.

Congratulations to both mum and daughter (sounds like a new arrival in the family ) for the Wadham offer. This is tremendous news fp!

I'm really happy for both of you but please, one word of genuine kind advice: the fat lady hasn't sung yet; she's just clearing her throat getting ready to sing. But sing she will eventually, I'm sure. In other words, I hope your DD will now put all this behind her, happy in the knowledge that she's got a place and concentrates fully now in achieving the grades.

From my end, no news yet so far but that's not surprising because DS did not apply to Oxford. He's gone for Cambridge instead (not PPE) and they'll only release the results in the new year.

The Scholars who'd applied to Oxford have all dispersed throughout the UK and across the world for the season's holidays and I haven't heard from them.

Good luck to all still waiting and I hope Santa will deliver the best Christmas present soon. Commiserations to those who were unsuccessful but I'm sure it's a blessing in disguise. Oxbridge isn't the be all and the end all.

A Peaceful Christmas to All!

Heard from son today that he received letter from LMH offering a place (PPE) on condition that he gets As for his two Advanced Highers and two crash Highers. It's taken a few hours to sink in.

Very true that Oxbridge is not the be all and end all. Sorry, Holly, that it didn't go your son's way, but I'm sure that he'll do well whichever university he decides on and afterwards.

Best of luck to all.

RRocks

Son says "Thank you.", Betelguese.

RRocks

Ds got an offer !!! 3 As to get - a bit of a relief as it could have been A*s had he gone for another course at Cambridge! Can't believe it at all!!!
So sorry Holly - I do think in the end it is the face fitting as I know all our Dcs are equally able!
I have to say I will definitely not be helicoptering my son.He has got this far by doing his own thing and he has to sink or swim on his own.Apart from anything else I am not nearly as bright as he is!
Good luck to everyone else!...

Rrocks and optimistic congratulations to your sons It is fine to enjoy success.
It took me two days to get my head round the news and believe it- only really believed when DD came round and showed me the letter which I had to read quite a few times.
Peteneras thanks for the kind advice.
My dear sister spent an hour and a half at the last family gathering (before interviews and in DD presence) letting us know all the reasons why my DD was not going to get an offer from Oxford and even if she did why she was not going to get the grades. This basically let us know our place. Thus as a family we are hardly complacent- that is reserved for grander mortals. Naturally we are delighted that she (my sister) wasted her breath.
Although- and I would never let my sister know this- the advantage of someone letting DD know her weaknesses is that DD got so cross she tried to make sure to address them before the interview.
There is good and bad news from other girls at DD school and I have let her know that loyal friends remain loyal whether Oxbridge or not.
Lets hope we all have the best Christmas present which is to be with our lovely children at Christmas, Oxbridge or not My two arrived home today. Hooray!

"My dear sister spent an hour and a half at the last family gathering (before interviews and in DD presence) letting us know all the reasons why my DD was not going to get an offer from Oxford . . ."

Coming from your own sister is most unexpected fp but take it from me, I?ve a feeling you and your DD are going to lose a few ?friends? come September when your DD finally packs up and leaves for Oxon. This is one great occasion when you find out for sure who your friends really are.

All the more you should be very proud of DD (as I'm sure you are) for showing her true grit!

Congrats on the two new offers.

Wonderful news on the offers. I kinda hate it that we can't take all the bright people we see. The last decisions are utterly gutwrenching. So your ds Holli absolutely must not feel he is rubbish. He did well to be shortlisted, tbh.

oooh, RRocks & om, congratulations to your boys!!!

Still don't know here - no letter yesterday, & post hasn't come yet today. I'm wondering if DS should ring the college?