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Guest post: "As sex workers, our lives depend on decriminalisation"

390 replies

JosephineMumsnet · 07/07/2016 12:19

I was 19 years old when I made the decision to sell sex. An unorthodox choice, certainly, but one which helped me get through university without crippling debt, and later, a choice which would allow me to return to university as a single parent and complete my second degree. Please don't fall into the trap of assuming that because I'm a white, middle-class, educated woman I can't possibly understand the abject misery that is sometimes seen in our industry. I stood on Burlington Road in Dublin in the dead of winter, often drunk or out of my head on cocaine, or both, selling sex at £30 a time. That's not privileged. Now, with over 20 years behind me, I can finally put that experience to use, and educate people about the realities of our industry, and what would make us safer.

As the debate around the sex industry gathers steam, there are two schools of thought. Punish the punters by making it illegal to purchase sex, or decriminalise the laws around sex work. Let's look at both.

The law that criminalises the punter was introduced in Sweden in 1999 and has been an abject failure. Its aim was to reduce prostitution by reducing 'demand', but the Swedish government admits there has been no change to the number of buyers, or sellers. So what has changed? Violence against sex workers has increased sharply, with police targeting their homes to arrest buyers, often resulting in their being made homeless. The most vulnerable sex workers on the streets cannot be reached by outreach services, to facilitate condom distribution or needle exchange, as they need to work away from police detection. Sex workers are refusing to report violence to police, as they know they place themselves at risk from the very people supposed to protect them. Stigma has increased, with sex workers in both Sweden and Norway reporting having their children removed, and deportation of migrant sex workers is rife.

One of the most infuriating strands to the current feminist discourse around sex work is the assertion that we are abused, or even raped, every time we sell sex. That statement is injurious and grossly insulting to those who have survived abuse and rape, and it also strips sex workers of our agency. As much as we campaign for the right to say 'yes', we absolutely reserve the right to say 'no'. I detest the use of the word 'empowerment' in any debate on sex work. My job is no more empowering than anyone else's; it allows me to support my family and pay my bills. But as a community, there is no doubt that we are more empowered to say 'no' when we are permitted to work together for safety.

Under current legislation, and even more so under the Swedish model, sex workers are not permitted to work more than one to a premises. If I ask a friend to share an apartment with me so I feel safer in accepting visiting clients, we can be arrested and charged with 'pimping' from each other. That practice is commonplace. As cash, mobile phones and laptops are often removed as 'evidence', the women concerned are left with nothing but a criminal record, simply for wishing to stay safe.

So what is decriminalisation? Not to be confused with legalisation, it refers to the removal of all criminal prohibitions and penalties on sex work. In doing so, it protects the human rights of sex workers, as acknowledged by WHO, UNAIDS, The Lancet and more recently, Amnesty International.

Decriminalisation allows us to work together for safety, which is crucial. Decriminalisation also makes it easier to access justice and support services, and facilitates a better response to true exploitation in the industry. When the police work with us, not against us, we are best placed to identify and report others in danger.

On June 1 2015, the Northern Irish Assembly made it illegal to purchase sex. I have launched a High Court challenge to that law and will take it to the European Court of Human Rights if necessary. You may not like or be comfortable with the exchange of sex for money and that's fine - that's not what this debate is about. It's about our right to safety in the workplace. 154 sex workers have been murdered since 1990. We ask for your support for decriminalisation. Our lives depend on it.

Read Kat Banyard's post here.

OP posts:
Felascloak · 12/07/2016 08:45

So western sex tourists are doing the world a massive favour by paying money to abuse women and children in poorer parts of the world? Its global wealth redistribution.
By that logic we should also be supporting heroin users because of the livelihood of farmers in Afghanistan.
Cocaine is fine because of the income to Brazil.
Gary Glitter moving to Cambodia was great news because of the children he personally lifted out of poverty.
Hmm

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 09:19

Felascloak

You are not thinking this through though, are you? Instead you just look for an angle to twist and attack.

(Do you know that the TIPP report shows a huge number of pedophile sex tourists from Sweden?
www.state.gov/j/tip/rls/tiprpt/countries/2015/243541.htm )

In Thailand women sell sex to because of the kind of poverty and privation we can't even wrap our heads around. Some of them are keeping entire extended families alive in the country.

What do you think would really happen to those women and their children in the real world if there were no westerners buying sex?

Felascloak · 12/07/2016 10:05

I don't know how you can say I haven't thought it through. I know women sell sex to feed their children, I would too if I was desperate.
I still don't think its a good thing for humanity for men to believe women and children are a commodity to be bought, and worse that its somehow helping them to be subject to sex tourism.
Seriously, you can make that exact argument for most kinds of organised crime or human exploitation. The heroin market is worth $4bn to Afghanistan. What would happen to those farmers without it? Should we decriminalize the trade in heroin? Should we pat heroin addicts on the head for their contribution to the developing world?
As a society we say no because of the absolute misery heroin addiction brings to users, their families and society around them.
Can you explain why the situation with prostitution in places like Thailand and Africa is different to that? Families are dependent on something that is detrimental to wider society in both cases.

LauraLee76 · 12/07/2016 10:17

@weeonion

My Gofundme page was started as soon as I started campaigning in Ireland. Contrary to popular belief, there is no "pimp lobby", and I don't get paid for any of the advocacy I do. The abolitionist organisations I fight are funded to the hilt. If for example I'm granted leave in Sept and we go to a full hearing then I will need to be in Belfast for five days straight, pay for travel, hotel costs and childcare. There's only so much I can fund of that myself.

Max Clifford was my first press agent. As soon as I was made aware of his activities I moved away. Obviously. I now don't have a press agent, I don't see the need for one as things stand.

In every case of separation and/or custody being fought through the courts, where the woman concerned is a sex worker, it's the first thing that's thrown at her to undermine her personally and as a mother. As family law matters tend to be held in private, then obviously they're not reported on by the press, but I am personally aware of many cases. The most damning case of all being Petite Jasmine in Sweden, who lost custody of her children to her abusive partner who went on to stab her to death.

What concerns me greatly with your post is the number of sex workers in Scotland you say have never heard of National Ugly Mugs. They save lives, and I'm wondering how I can spread the word.

Felascloak · 12/07/2016 10:21

In every case of separation and/or custody being fought through the courts, where the woman concerned is a sex worker, it's the first thing that's thrown at her to undermine her personally and as a mother
How do you think decriminalization would help with that? And why wouldn't the Nordic model have an equal effect? I believe the Nordic model would have the sameimpact as it criminalized the punters, not the prostitutes.

DiddlySqeak · 12/07/2016 10:26

All these reports and research can't get away from the fact that is pathetic and disgusting for anyone to pay for sex and that anyone who chooses to be paid for sex is encouraging it. The sex trade is nasty, cruel And exploitive.

I don't care if you claim to be a feminist or not choosing to be a prostitue is sad and perpetuates the warped belief that it's ok for men to 'buy' women. All the 'research' in the world isn't going to change that.

LauraLee76 · 12/07/2016 10:34

To be clear, I don't defend or promote the sex industry. On the contrary, if you knew how much time I spend talking women OUT of entering the industry, I think you'd be surprised. What I campaign for is the right for us to work in safety. No other job I can think of compels us to work alone, that needs to stop. The attackers who go after sex workers aren't clients, they're opportunists who know we are alone, probably carrying cash and highly unlikely to report crime to the police. Perfect pickings.

So, what decriminalisation would mean for us is to allow 2/3 women to form collectives and share an apartment for safety. The police are then stopped from arresting us from "pimping" from each other, stopped from taking our mobile phones and money and stopped from throwing sex workers out of hotel rooms in the dead of night. Those are rights everyone else takes for granted, that they would be treated with dignity and fairness. Sex workers have come to expect the worst, and even then sometimes they still surprise us.

Jessica was an escort who was murdered not too long ago in Aberdeen. (I'm not putting her full name up out of respect for her child who can google). In the time leading up to her death, she was very frightened, and knew she was in trouble. She texted her friends for help but it was too late, by the time they got there she was dead. She suffered a death that no living being should ever have to endure. She didn't call the police. Why? Because here in Scotland their track record with sex workers is nothing short of appalling. Had there been two other sex workers in that apartment, the outcome would have been entirely different. And THAT is why I will not give up fighting for decriminalisation.

Felascloak · 12/07/2016 10:52

I am no expert, but why couldn't all those thing be achieved while still penalizing punters? I'm against decriminalization because of the potential for German style super brothels and for companies to exist to exploit women.

FloraFox · 12/07/2016 10:58

The 2/3 women working in a collective was part of the narrative for changing the law in Germany. What they ended up with was mega brothels and men queuing around the block for flat fee brothels.

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 11:02

Felascloak

I still don't think its a good thing for humanity for men to believe women and children are a commodity to be bought

Men do not buy "women and children" they buy sexual services as offered. (Is a service a commodity? Probably, in some sense but if one service is classed as a commodity, they all are).

Thick and all as I am happy to concede some men are, I think they MAY have got it through their heads by now that buying sexual services from children is at least very serious crime, and hopefully, a social anathema.

and worse that its somehow helping them to be subject to sex tourism.

They make a lot more money far more easily...which part of that is unhelpful?

As a society we say no because of the absolute misery heroin addiction brings to users, their families and society around them.
Can you explain why the situation with prostitution in places like Thailand and Africa is different to that? Families are dependent on something that is detrimental to wider society in both cases.

So you are saying if heroin is given away free it is harmless, it is only when you introduce money into the equation that it causes misery?

Because that is what you are saying about sex.

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 11:08

Felascloak

I am no expert, but why couldn't all those thing be achieved while still penalizing punters? I'm against decriminalization because of the potential for German style super brothels and for companies to exist to exploit women.

Apart from it being a legally idiotic precedent to criminalise the buyer but not the seller in such a transaction, and the fact that decriminalisation and the situation in Germany are two different things, penalising the buyer means the sex worker has to hide from the authorities to be able to make any money...which is the point of sex work, not making a political stand.

If you daren't go near the authorities because to do so will cost you your livelihood, and what is more every gobsh*te who ever felt like snatching a handbag knows it, particularly in what has to remain a cash business (because of the criminalisation of you clients) you become a sitting target.

Woman alone hiding with pile of cash?

YUM YUM

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 11:16

Florafox

The 2/3 women working in a collective was part of the narrative for changing the law in Germany. What they ended up with was mega brothels and men queuing around the block for flat fee brothels.

Now that is a tricky beggar, I admit...how to legalise one without the other?

One thing I came up with was to use biometric (the card itself stores a fingerperint or retina image - no need for any record of name and details anywhere) identification cards for licensed indoor workers.

Legal to rent to a licensed worker at reasonable market rent for the area. Illegal to rent to an unlicensed worker or at an inflated rent.

Same goes for sharing premises...legal for licensed workers to share premises, illegal for unlicensed workers to share permises.

People will sneak around that, but people will sneak around any legislation, and it is REALLY CHALLENGING to be sneaky about a German style mega brothel (which I loathe on the grounds of good taste).

There is always a way to copperfasten a law if you want to.

FloraFox · 12/07/2016 11:21

legally idiotic precedent to criminalise the buyer but not the seller

It's not idiotic at all.

I'm not responding to your biometric nonsense as it's not worth the effort.

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 11:27

In every case of separation and/or custody being fought through the courts, where the woman concerned is a sex worker, it's the first thing that's thrown at her to undermine her personally and as a mother
How do you think decriminalization would help with that? And why wouldn't the Nordic model have an equal effect? I believe the Nordic model would have the same impact as it criminalized the punters, not the prostitutes.

The problem with the Nordic model in this instance is that it imposes a mindset that does not reflect reality.

All the BS talked by abolitionists to lobby for Nordic Model is BAD...but when that same BS is tied in to service provision and health and welfare ethos it becomes worse again in an even more damaging way.

Jasmin, the Swedish Lady who was murdered had her kids taken from her and full custody without access given to their father who was acknowledged to be violent because she disagreed with the ideology of the Nordic Model and refused to see herself as a victim of her clients and in need of "help" from her bitter adversaries. APART from the mess this mentality would make in the head of any woman trying to break all the chains of DV...her personal opinions (to which she should be entitled as a human right) were tagged as "self harm" (exactly as if she were cutting herself).

When you fully decriminalise Sex work you are telling the truth and saying:
You may not like it, but this is decent honest work that some people do and no reflection on any other aspect of who they are.

It takes a couple of decades, but people catch on.

The Nordic Model says:
"This is a poor little victim who cannot even think for herself or make her own decisions and does not realise how much she needs our help"

Now, which one sounds more like a competent parent?

TheRealPosieParker · 12/07/2016 11:28

I really cannot comprehend how we have to got to this point in society where women are advocating for prostitution should be easier for men.... what happened?

TheRealPosieParker · 12/07/2016 11:30

When you fully decriminalise Sex work you are telling the truth and saying:
You may not like it, but this is decent honest work that some people do and no reflection on any other aspect of who they are.

It doesn't say that. It says we fully accept that we as a society have no respect for women and along with beauty standards, porn and general misogyny we are quite happy to convince women that they are on this earth to please men. We keep women poor so we can pay to fuck them.

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 11:30

Florafox

I'm not responding to your biometric nonsense as it's not worth the effort.

Translation:
You might have something there but I wouldn't admit that under torture.

FloraFox · 12/07/2016 11:40

Nope. The foundation for your position is so corrupted and your posts are deluded. It's just not worth addressing your post. They are fundamentally flawed and not one iota of a worthwhile idea. Hope that's clear enough.

GayeDalton · 12/07/2016 12:05

TheRealPosieParker

I really cannot comprehend how we have to got to this point in society where women are advocating for prostitution should be easier for men.... what happened?

Don't be silly, it's pretty obvious I just want sex work to be as easy and safe as possible for sex workers. Like any business, sex work depends on it's market, attacking the market just aims to make life difficult, and even impossible, for the sex worker.

weeonion · 12/07/2016 12:40

Hi lauralee.

Thanks for responding.
I hope TITP was a great weekend.

In relation to your crowd funding - is it true that a large escort agency put quite a large lump sum into it? Whilst you say you do not defend this industry - you are financially linked to pimps through this??

In relation to uglymugs - work is happening in Scotland to make more aware of it. Some women are dubious of it, give its CEO and what he says. They dont agree with his views and avoid it due to him.

What are you thoughts on the latest police Scotland prostitution policy where they clearly say non enforcement is their stance? In recent police operations no women have been charged with brothel keeping when found together in 1 premise. I believe forthcoming crown office guidance will reinforce that. A step in the right direction surely?

I am confused - you say clients don't commit violence???? What are they then?? It seems like saying boyfriends, partners and husbands dont rape / commit violence - only opportunist men who want to committ violence and get into relationships to do so??
I think it is very interesting that many of those in prostitution in Scotland dont know about those orgs which say they represent them, such as SWOU, IUSW, scot pep etc. How can they possibly claim to speak about their best interests when they have never spoken to so many?

Felascloak · 12/07/2016 12:40

Men do not buy "women and children" they buy sexual services as offered. (Is a service a commodity? Probably, in some sense but if one service is classed as a commodity, they all are). Semantics I'm afraid - if a man has paid to use another persons body for sex he has bought them. And sex is not a service - a masseuse decides how he/she will massage their customer. In prostitution the buyer decides, as all those disappointed punters on the invisible man project show.

Thick and all as I am happy to concede some men are, I think they MAY have got it through their heads by now that buying sexual services from children is at least very serious crime, and hopefully, a social anathema. Well obviously not because plenty still travel to Cambodia and Thailand to abuse children (and give the family money)
I want a situation where buying sexual services from anyone is seen in that light.

BeyondBeyondBeyondBeyondBeyond · 12/07/2016 12:48

"We keep women poor so we can pay to fuck them"

Yy. That's all I can see here with the legislation proposed to stick a plaster on women in poverty rather than address the actual problem.

TheRealPosieParker · 12/07/2016 12:50

This reply has been deleted

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LauraLee76 · 12/07/2016 13:28

@weeonion

TITP was great thanks, and no probs re response, I'm always happy to engage in respectful debate and answer genuine questions.

Escort Ireland made a donation of £1,000 to my fund which was a great help towards the last fees. To be clear, EI are an advertising platform/website, they are not an escort agency. I am in no way financially linked to pimps, I am an independent escort. When the next legal bill comes in I will be calling on other advertising websites to help out too. Sex workers who pay to advertise on EI put pressure on them to donate, since they make money from industry and are committed to helping to maintain safety for sex workers too. That's not to say they wouldn't have donated anyway, they've always been supportive of my campaigning by giving me the space to blog, for example, or post on the forum to raise support from other workers.

I really don't understand any dubious attitudes towards NUM, after all, you can sign up using just your work name and number, and personally I'd prefer to know if a dangerous client is in the area.

If Police Scotland have introduced a non enforcement policy re women working together then that's brilliant, and to be welcomed. I can't help but think it's in response to the outcry following Jessica's murder, but let's see. There's a long way to go to patch up the relationship between the police and sex workers in Scotland, but it's not an impossible task.

Sorry if I was too sweeping in the statement about clients, they do commit violence too, of course they do. But a lot of attacks on sex workers take the form of robbery and physical violence from men with no intention of ever purchasing sex.

Finally, I try and reach as many sex workers as I can. So for example when Rhoda Grant was trying to introduce the Nordic model in Scotland, I went to every sauna in Edinburgh, contacted ads in the Sunday Sport and went out on street to speak to the workers there too. I don't claim to speak for all sex workers, no one person can. But every sex worker led organisation around the world is calling for decriminalisation.