My opinion - I told my DIL & son while she was early in her pregnancy that I did not want to be called Grandma Alice, I hate it! I wanted a name that fits my personality and I choose Grammie (fun, funny & silly). Once my grands could talk and came up with their own version of trying to say Grammie, I would probably go with that. The first 4 1/2 years Grammie was excepted, no complaints. Then one day out of the blue my (controlling) DIL emailed me and said you will be called Grandma Alice, or you don't see your grandkids. No if ands or buts. That was back in 2017 and I'm still fighting 2022. I've tolerated a lot of my DIL's controlling shangins toward me over the years without any retaliation on my part. Oh, I haven't seen my grands since 2017. Finally, they are getting a divorce...she left. My son has now threatened me if I don't comply to Grandma Alice, he walks (away) forever. Sad. The grands get to choose (because they have earned from raising their own to choose), and the parents approve or collaborate with some suggested grand names.