Is my dog G+T

[Teacakeandalatte]

My dog is only 3 but she can already tell the time and has got through several chapter books during the holidays. She is quite good at languages and can almost say 'sausages'. In sport she excels and is much better at ball games than all her friends.
Should I be aiming for Oxbridge?

My dog is so bright, he consciously defies plebian expectations of his species by never catching a ball in public.

Forgot to add she is very pretty and has a lovely tail.

signify that is a sign of intellect does he wear hipster glasses?

He wore them last year. This year's all about ironic stockings. Should I send him to the Folies Bergere?

Sounds very average to me. My friends dog had figured out the safety lock on the fridge by 16 weeks, even if he lacked to fine motor skills not to remove some of the casing with it. At 6 months could do fractions, of shoes, furniture, soft furnishings. By 12 months old he was pursuing his engineering interests by breaking down the large corner sofa into small components, and basic diy such as unhanging heavy oak doors and creating small wooden sculptures from them with an impressionist twist. His maths was definitely advanced, from the start he instinctively understood the concept of remainders. With an uncanny skill for the equations of motion, where the mass, velocity and force of a very large and exuberant young dog is always > owners, visitors and household fixtures.

They spent literally thousands helping him pursue his genius early interests and yet at middle age he’s just a normal, well adjusted dog.

signify I would but he will come home and tell you your taste is distinctly middlebrow.

PFB?

My dog eschews mathematics for self-expression, favouring as he does a Fauvistic form of painting with his own brightly coloured faeces. Using his tongue. On domestic carpet. The Royal Academy have expressed some interest but I feel more inclined towards a collaboration with Banksy or Chris Ofili.

Beautiful!

Sadly ddog is not really keen on the sciences (although she does have an interest in biology and recently dissected a dead seagull she found on the beach) but in general her tastes are more literary and she loves to settle down with a good book, something she can really get her teeth into ideally.

My cat’s view is that no dogs are gifted.

My dog is really clever, he knows not to eat his own shit 😁

Cats think they are so superior just because they have all humans under their control, and are good with computers. But does anyone want a guide cat? I think not!

It’s a class thing. Dogs have to have jobs, whether that’s a guide dog, working dog or a sahdog contributing to the family with their social qualities. No matter what they do they’ll never climb higher than upper middle class.

Whereas cats are the true upper classes, landed gentry/ inherited wealth. They aren’t required to do anything except what they please. Whilst being served by their human staff. Even cats who appear to work at vermin control aren’t actually real down to earth farmers, they just follow their interests in country pursuits.

My dog is the PM of Latvia.

Don't forget that one human year is equivalent to several dog years. In fact your dog is actually 28 and certainly ought to be able to bark out 'sausages' and perform a few rudimentary tricks with a ball by now.

Get back to me when she's figured out what to do about Brexit.

My dogs are able to read minds, if i start to think about going to bed they try to race passed me so as not to be locked in the living room.

They start to study my every move from 10pm onwards. I can no longer reach for the remote, put my slippers on or take off my glasses undetected.

My dog is not a pipe.

My dog already plays the violin with beautiful tone and expression. She likes to hold the audience on the edge of their seats, waiting for the last notes. It's her big paws.

If ges not reading Harry Potter then no hes not g&t!