Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Gifted and talented

Talk to other parents about parenting a gifted child on this forum.

Original poster

That's better! Now I'll post again . Not sure if this is the right thread, but any help much appreciated!

32 replies

funkimummy · 07/07/2007 10:17

Hi,

My DS is 4, 5 in January and won't go to school until January.

We know he is exceptionally bright for his age. He learned how to sing the alphabet on his second birthday with a toy that sang the song and has a vocabulary that people comment about on a daily basis. His numeracy is also very good. He asks questions about global warming FGS!

His pre-school and nursery both say that he is ready for school now and that really he should go in September. Their concerns are that the children he goes up school with in January are not on 'his leve' (their words not mine!) Also they have told me to keep a watchful eye as he will get bored easily because of his brightness.

Should I be concerned? He's my eldest and I don't like to be a pushy parent, and am not. I am a bit worried that he will get bored easily at school and might not fare as well because his mind is racing ahead!

Does anyone have any opinions/thoughts/experience of this?

Any thoughts would be gratefully accepted.

OP posts:
filthymindedvixen · 07/07/2007 10:31

I'd say, why not wait and see how he does in january. The school will soon work out if he is streets ahead of the others in his class. School is a huge tranisition from preschool for any child and reception year is as much about social and emotional development as anything else. Doesn't matter a jot if your child is reading Shakespeare, if he cannot engage successfully with other children, or get himself dressed properly or obey simple instructions...
Meanwhile, there's nothing to stop you doing fun stuff to keep him engaged at home - museum visits, library, castles etc.

Just as an illustration, My younger ds was given a english-french picture dictionary as a leaving present when he left preschool as having learned to read, count, do basic addition etc, he started on learning french numbers, colours etc off his own bat.
Sadly (!) about to enter into yr2, he has levelled out to bog-standard, very happy and still bright but not gifted and talented by any stretch of the imagination.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 10:34

Thanks FMV. It's so nice to get other people's opinions.

FWIW, he interacts very well with anyone who'll listen! He's fine with instruction, and dressing himself etc. I sometimes wonder who is the adult in our relationship!

OP posts:
AudreyFforbesHamilton · 07/07/2007 10:42

DS2 was assessed by a child psychologist at the age of 4, because he was so verbally advanced. He had an IQ test which showed him as being well above average.

He is now nearly 10, and I'm lucky if he grunts an acknowledgement when I go to wake him up in the morning.

And I have to staple his eyelids to the page to get him to read regularly.

I think he may have peaked too soon!

KerryMum · 07/07/2007 10:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 10:48

Thanks kerrymum. Yes he is miles ahead! Both nursery and the pre-school he goes to say so!

DH skipped a year at school and was advanced up to the next class, which was unheard of in the mid-80's around here!

Perhaps I ought to speak to the school...

OP posts:
cornsilk · 07/07/2007 10:52

Check what records the nursery and pre school have sent up - it may well have been identified in those in which case the school will be aware. Try not to be too concerned if he's not 'working' at first - most reception classes are organised with play based learning.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:00

Thanks Cornsilk, I won't be. He loves playing!

OP posts:
GrowlingTiger · 07/07/2007 11:06

Skipping a year is now very unusual in UK state schools due to the league tables. But there is typically plenty of ways in which a brighter child can have extension work within their usual class.

How confident is his reading and writing? If he is a fluent reader then he may find some of the class activities a bit tedious, so it might be worth finding out how the school approaches that. There tends to be lots of phonic activities to start with. But the more able boys still did the phonic activities but spent more time working on writng activities.

If he is writng confidently then again have a word with the school to ensure that he is using their style of letter formation - schools approach some of tyher letters differently and it is confusing for some boys to have to re-learn their letters.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:11

He's very good with phonics and understands the non-phonic association of letters too.

His reading skills - well he loves books of any shape or form, although being only 4 he doesn't 'read' but is beginning to recognise words.

He's always been a bit to fidgety to sit still long enough to write his own name but has started to do it in the last few months and has picked it up very quickly.

OP posts:
Tommy · 07/07/2007 11:21

he sounds like my DS1 who is just coming to the end of Reception. If it is school policy not to end them til Jan, they obviously have a reason for it and they may not take him early anyway. Not all Autumn term children will be on "his level" either but there may well be some brighter ones in Jan intake of course!

If the school is any good they will challenge him enough to stop him being bored as it is in their interests anyway to keep him occupied and well behaved.

I wouls just let him go when he should in Jan and make sure you keep him busy until then

GrowlingTiger · 07/07/2007 11:22

Without wishing to burst your bubble in any way, many reception classes will have at least a couple of children who can read prior to starting school - and I mean "read", not simply sound out phonics. We had one boy who was already on chapter books. And in terms of writing, girls especially are often writing prior to school - several girls in ds2's very ordinary pre-school bring in letters for the teachers - some random spelling admittedly. Writing is an area where boys tend to lag behind. My ds2 (4 in May) can write his name - but I don't think that that puts him in the top 5% or whatever. (though of course I think that he is bright - I have never met a mother who doesn't think that her 4yo is bright!)

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:25

Oh I appreciate that growlingtiger. I didn't mean he was G & T because he could recognise words. Was just answering your question!

Just wondered if anyone had any experience / thoughts on the subject as a whole

OP posts:
IsabelWatchingItRainInMacondo · 07/07/2007 11:27

I would wait until january.

My sister and 2 of my friends were moved up a year as they could read, write, and ask complex questions since they were very young. They have done well in school, they were the best in their years but they all complain that they were not emotionally mature enough at the time they had to take more complex decisions at certain points (like choosing a degree to study being 15, etc)

The other day I was talking to one of them who told me her girl was following her same steps and already getting a bit bored in school. I mentioned that in the worst case scenario she will be moved to next grade which didn't seem too bad to me. She said that she wanted to avoid that as much as she could as she didn't enjoy being always the small one, even if she was intelligent enough to put the older kids to shame.

GrowlingTiger · 07/07/2007 11:28

I hadn't realised he was that old - ds2 who is 4 months younger than him will be in fulltime school from September. Why is he not starting until January - that is fairly late isn't it? Most LEAs want them in school asap for funding purposes? Is Essex different?

GrowlingTiger · 07/07/2007 11:29

I think that I'd be more worried that he would be bored in preschool for the first term to be honest, as he'd be with much younger children.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:31

I know growlingtiger! I find it really odd too. All the other schools in the area take them at 4! Most of the children he goes up with in January will be younger than him, and there will be children who are but a few weeks older than him who go up in September.

We live in a relatively small community but do have two schools to choose from in our vicinity. The other would take him in
September?!? The only troube is, it isn't a very good school!

OP posts:
IsabelWatchingItRainInMacondo · 07/07/2007 11:32

BTW, DS can read and has the math skills of a Y1 child, he is not meant to start reception until January according to local guidelines, however, his independant school has only one entry to reception in September so he is starting in a couple of months.

He may be intelligent enough to cope with the challenge, but he looks like a baby compared to the other boys in his class

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:33

Yes that's exactly my worry. He does get bored, and if he finds it too challenging to play with a child at pre-school because he feels they are too 'babyish' (his words!) he'll play on his own instead

OP posts:
GrowlingTiger · 07/07/2007 11:36

Certainly I would talk to the school and see why you're only being given the option of a January intake and find out whether you have the option of a September date. If there is no option then you're stuck, but it is only a term at the end of the day.

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:38

True, true. Thanks for your input growlingtiger, and everyone else who has posted. I felt a bit silly for posting this thread, but if you don't ask for information, you don't get!

OP posts:
Enid · 07/07/2007 11:42

sorry - but if he cannot read or write then I fail to see that he is 'miles ahead'

send him in January and do other stuff with him until then

Original poster
funkimummy · 07/07/2007 11:47

Enid, 'miles ahead' are what his pre-school and nursery think. I'm just looking for info and or advice on the subject.

OP posts:
Enid · 07/07/2007 11:50

well if you can go in September, do

If you can't, then I promise you it won't make any difference

if it is a good primary then they will be able to encourage him academically

dd2 (4) can read most cvc words and write all letters and numbers - you may find that others in his class can do the same and he will be stimulated by them. Believe me, it is important to learn to sit and listen, to socialise and just, well, fit in at school. Hopefully that will occupy him at some level. He does sound like a bright child and hopefully he will enjoy school and it will bring the best out in him.

Enid · 07/07/2007 11:55

dd2 says that about other kids being 'babyish' and often plays on her own

tbh I don't like it when she says that and tell her to be more tolerant. AND I don't believe her either, I think she says it when she can't cope with them or they don't want to play with her! I am hoping that school will encourage her to rub along a bit better with other girls especially.

singersgirl · 07/07/2007 11:56

The thing is, however bright he is (and I don't doubt he is!) if he's not reading fluently and writing well, then he will be learning a lot in Reception. He may well learn it more quickly than other children. I can see that the issue is more that he is ready to start more formal learning in September rather than waiting until January.

Is he only part-time at preschool? Why not teach him to read and write yourself next term? That will keep him stimulated until January.

DS2 started Reception aged 4 years and 2 weeks reading fluently, adding, knowing numbers into the 100s etc, but he wasn't very good at writing, so that was a big challenge for him.