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Gifted and talented

Talk to other parents about parenting a gifted child on this forum.

Is this normal?

88 replies

DieAntword · 05/07/2018 13:08

I feel embarrassed to even be writing this but I do sometimes marvel and wonder and then I feel bad for even thinking such things. I know every toddler parent thinks their kid is super smart and I know you can't really tell until they're much older because early in life parental effort has a big impact on skills but as a child gets older it's more and more down to innate ability/personality. I also know there's nothing to "do" about it at this age.

But I swear my kid is super smart and I had such an awful time in school because I was "ahead" (dunno about smart, if we go by the parental investment effect for early development it was probably just that my parents worked with me a lot - once I hit my teens I crashed and burned mightily). I want to keep an eye out so my son can avoid some of the awful experiences I had.

Anyway, my son is 2 on saturday. He is getting close to reading (knows all the letter sounds and has one exactly one occasion successfully blended them). He knew all his 2D shapes before he was 1. He took longer with colours, was about 19 months when he consistently got his colours right. He can get you a number of objects on command but isn't perfect, I mean he will go get the right number if you ask but sometimes he will get excited counting and get more and then if you ask again he gets the right number - at least for numbers up to 6. He can enumerate indefinitely IF you point to the objects. If he points he gets excited and just keeps counting and not paying attention to the objects anymore.

I'd say his drawing ability is pretty much average, he will draw lines and "ovals" (round scribbles) and identify them. He will do a bunch of sharp scribbles and call them writing (like say "that says my name") but he completely lacks the fine motor skill to do better than that.

His gross motor is about normal too I think. It was ahead for a while but he hasn't really got the hang of jumping with 2 feet yet (seen him do it once but he didn't realise he did it - just happened from excitement - and hasn't repeated it). When we colour he tries to stay in the lines but doesn't have anything like the ability to actually do so and mostly he prefers to turn to the blank side of the paper and scribble.

I'd say his social skills were maybe a bit delayed for a while but he seems to be catching up - he copies and participates in group activities (i.e. doing the movements to songs, singing along) at playgroup. He does greet both adults and children finally etc. Still parallel plays for the most part.

His verbal skills are what impress me most, he can tell a (totally nonsensical) story e.g. "the bees buzz and then they go to the flowers when the flowers open, the grass is open and the birds, the birds are fly, and then they went to the shop and got some BREAD!" He's just getting a handle on "why?" and "because". He can talk about and seems to understand "now", "later", "after that", "today", "tomorrow" and "the day after tomorrow". He can use past and present tense versions of verbs. He doesn't yet use ing very often and he still reverses pronouns. He also uses "the" far more than is required.

I guess I am just curious where he is at developmentally. I kept meticulous (and proud) track before my second was born but since then I have not really paid any attention. It is really fascinating to watch his little personality unfold though.

Do you think this is a pretty normal level for a just about 2 year old?

OP posts:
corythatwas · 05/07/2018 23:43

BettertoChange, where do you get the idea that you can never be proud of a g & t child because they don't work hard? My dn worked bloody hard to learn his instrument to the level he has. My db worked pretty hard to learn Latin and Greek on his own while studying STEM subjects at school. Part of giftedness ime is that drive to find new outlets for your creativity.

BertrandRussell · 06/07/2018 00:00

“BertrandRussell in some ways I'd like it if my kids turned out to be a bit of a flop”

I didn’t actually mean it when I said my dd’s 2.1 counted as a failure. I do hope you won’t think of your children as “flops” if they get 2.1s......

BertrandRussell · 06/07/2018 00:02

“Then she wanted me to send it to her friends who work at the nursery school and have masters“

The debate is not about whether the nursery workers have masters. It’s about how many of the children do.

LemonysSnicket · 06/07/2018 00:57

Sounds similar to me. I could read before 3 and finished the yr 6 library age 5.5. Every kid is different and I've always been very smart but not 'unusually' so.
I'm good with facts and retention but no one would say I was a Sheldon Cooper. You're being a bit PFB.

Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 06/07/2018 04:56

Gosh, heatwave has so many friends! Pretending to be her on mn, asking her for mn texts, not even too busy to look at mn threads and make comments in the middle of the day at nursery (must be because the kids are all amusing themselves reading independently). And you have a genius child to boot! You must be such a wonderful, well-adjusted person. Do you have “masters” too, Heatwave? How DO you find the time to put other people’s children down on a G&T forum? Just taking a short break from your busy and successful career no doubt.

DieAntword · 06/07/2018 06:28

@BertrandRussell hardly could when they’d have done better than me (but I do feel like one).

OP posts:
Beetlebum1981 · 06/07/2018 07:24

DD1 is 3 is September, her speech is super she has a really good memory but she has no idea when it comes to letters. I've tried but she's just not interested 😂 I think your DC sounds bright if they're identifying letters and sounds at their age. I'm a primary teacher so have a vague idea of what they can and can't do at 7+ but my Early Years knowledge is very much lacking I'm afraid.

heatwave2018 · 06/07/2018 07:49

One of them was taking the day off, I do hope you forgive them for taking a day off and not working 24/7. The other nursery school assistants all take scheduled breaks hence why they could see the post too. Someone mentioned the degree thing hence why I mentioned they had masters as you clearly don’t believe me haha. If you want to know why I’m not at work that is because I have a serious medication condition but would rather not talk about that

memaymamo · 06/07/2018 11:11

My main thing was that I hate parents who brag about their children

This may be affecting your objectivity on this thread.

SoyDora · 06/07/2018 11:22

The OP wasn’t bragging, she was asking in the ‘Gifted and talented’ topic if people thought her child’s abilities were normal. Thats that the board is there for.

Quartz2208 · 06/07/2018 11:26

When it comes to intelligent normal is a very wide range following the bellcurve.

Anyone who tries to say that the OPs little boy isnt in the top end of the normal range is lying or being horrible - because he is definitely in the top end of normal. But still normal.

He sounds a lot my DD - she is happily now top of the class and preparing for Grammar School and the 11+

81Byerley · 06/07/2018 11:40

What is it about bright children and their parents that brings out the worst in other parents? The OP's little boy sounds advanced to me, and her post was very balanced. I would be amazed if most children could do these things. Having been a nursery nurse childminder and foster carer and a mum, and nana to some amazingly bright children, I can honestly say, this little boy sounds very advanced for his age. My friend's little girl, aged 18 months and so tiny she was wearing 6-12 months clothes, was drawing in a steamed up window on the train, when the lady opposite, not expecting a reply from the baby, said "That's a lovely drawing, is it a teddy bear?" and received the reply "No, it's a hexagon, actually!"...and it was! Sam grew up to be a very bright woman, never got less than 100% in any test or exam at school, Got a first at uni, but has settled down to be a bright but normal woman, and is a teacher.

corythatwas · 06/07/2018 12:22

Agree with 81Byerley that the OP's post sounded very balanced and not at all bragging.

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