Do you ever wonder what it's like to have a normal child?

[RoboJesus]

I always imagined having a normal child and I've been thinking a lot about it lately. Having a gifted child definitely changes things. Obviously I love my child perfectly as they are though. Does anyone get what I mean?

Nothing to do with living rurally. Most of the women in my circle of village wives are quite bright. We have one who gardens and knits but in her spare time she’s a GP partner. One is currently sailing across the Atlantic up is more usually a consultation obstetrician. Another runs the village film club (often subtitled or niche films). She’s a fantastic winemaker too but is often kept busy as a Barrister. Who else....a solicitor, a headteacher, another GP, a dermatologist, a dentist, an investment banker, a wine importer, a publisher. Most not too dim to converse on a range of subjects.

Surely it depends what you mean by “rural”. That could be a small but well-connected village in the countryside, or it could be a lonely lighthouse in the middle of nowhere, or anything in between.

Well if you’re in a lonely lighthouse then you’re going to find it hard pressed to have any sort of conversation with anyone without making a huge effort, but I think if you are genuinely finding it hard to find anyone to talk about anything remotely intellectual then you need to widen your circle. I have a number of different jobs/ run a couple of small businesses and work with a range of people - from professors/researchers (where I run a business in an academic role at postdoc level) to a nmw job. Even in my nmw job there are people who like to discuss topics in detail & intelligently. They may not want to discuss the exact same topic as you (when I want to catch up on the finer points of Brexit & have an academic analysis of it I catch up with one particular friend because I know whatever else we talk about he will bring me up to speed on that, my other friends don’t know as much or analyse it in the way he does) but lots of people in all walks of life like to have discussions about various topics at a deeper level.

My son is considered gifted and talented by his school and is invited to various workshops and extra curriculum activities etc. He'd much rather be an ace football player unfortunately! He's definitely normal. Just a high achiever in some areas. Was a freaky toddler though, with his maths ability and vocabulary (And unable to walk until 22 months)

He's definitely normal. Just a high achiever in some areas.

You said it. High achiever is not the same as gifted. G&T program at school is not the same as gifted as per assessment by psychologist.

G&T program at school no-one has any idea what a gifted and talented programme in a school might be, the 10% programme was dropped eight years ago, a school is now free to do whatever they want, maybe the school only puts one in one per decade...

A gifted child is not abnormal. May be somewhat eccentric, quirky but that's interesting.

Rebecca, a gifted child is the top 2% of the population as demonstrated by an IQ test taken with a psychologist. That’s an IQ over 130. To be profoundly gifted (like the OP’s child) you need an IQ over 180. The more gifted a child is, the more extreme their “quirks” become to the extent that they really are abnormal. Raising a profoundly gifted child is very challenging. You can’t judge all gifted children on the basis of a few you might know.

I agree that it is very interesting. There’s a lot of information online for anyone who’s genuinely interested.

There's no such thing as an IQ over 180.

So stuff that in your sock and take it on.

Erm, I’m guessing you don’t read much, hairy. 😂

I have four children, all with different strength and abilities and my heart aches for all of them when they have to confront their weaknesses.

As a parent, I found it easier to boost and boast about their strengths, but ultimately I realised that dealing with their weaknesses is the best service you can do to a child longer term.

One child for example struggles massively academically and whilst the temptation has always been to allow him to do as little as possible and enjoy his decimal life, nailing him down and supporting to reach a minimum average standard is paying off..

Similarly we have a child with a very high IQ but our focus has always been to get him off the books, the obsessive interests to try sports, socialise and put himself out there as this is an area where he does have many difficulties. I suppose he could be a genius by now but we tried our best to make all the children feel normal no matter what their traits, as like others said, it makes them accept their quirks and manage a happier life..