How fat (big) would your 3yo have to be...

[MascaraOHara]

..before you were concerned enough to see a HV/GP?

Do you mean what weight?

I guess, yes.

but in proportion to height/build of course

Why do you ask? You are obviously concerned if you are askng at all

Depends how tall ...

Would depend on a number of things:-
1)Does he eat incessantly (i.e. lots outside of mealtimes?)
2) Is he generally active or inactive - and does his size hinder his ability to be active?
3) Does he eat generally healthily?
4) Is he ok in himself?

'Why do you ask? You are obviously concerned if you are askng at all'

Yes of course I'm asking because I'm concerned BUT my opinion of weight might not be ther general opinion so I am interested so I can gauge whethe ror not I should be concerned.

Height last time measured (a long time ago) was on 97th(?) centile - as was weight.

Hard to tell if weight impairs activity as was a very later developer in that sense, didn't walk after 18mth. Is clumsy - is only just beginning to run with any competancy at 3. Someone who I've never met did ask if she was dyspraxic but I don't think she is. She is very sharp mentally just not at all well coordinated physically. Not very active, still doesn't climb particularly well etc

M2G - I think she eats ALOT but what can I do, I don't want to stop her eating if there's nothing wrong with her.

It's not so much NOw that I'm worried about, it's the future

If she was 97th centile for height and weight she's obviously in proportion. Does she seem heavier for her height now?

As long as you are encouraging a healthy diet, limiting the junk and helping her to be active there's not a lot more you can do atm, I shouldn't think?

Not sure that's any help...

Is she eating a lot at mealitmes or snacking in between? I find my kids ask for food in between meals if they are bored (like it's raining and they can't go out to play). Might be that she's eating but not necesarily hungry all the time.

That was a long time ago though - I would guess she's off the centile on both now. She has size 10 feet and she's 3!!!

I worry because although I limit the junk she's sees her father and he gives her coke and macdonalds etc (even though I ask him not to) when I ask him to stop because I'm concerned he will take her more and more to get at me.

She's a nursery mostly during the week so mealitimes are limited but her granparents STUFF her with Chocolate and busiscuits it's really pisses me off. can't they see she's fat? or am I just neurotic?!?!?!:? If I say anything they go off the scale , get all upset and offended

She's not obese don't get me wrong but I do worry about her future

I'm all for her having 1 buscuit but does she really need 3 or 4 in one go?? imho the answer is NO.

Oh that is hard...

How about asking if he would take her to McD's say once a fortnight as a treat rather than all the time? Would he accept that?

The fact that you are not sure if you should be concerned enough suggests to be that your DD is not obviously overweight? I would be careful getting caught up in Health Visitors charts of what's normal and not unless you really trust your HV. British children around this age are often very slight and tend to get overweight later in childhood I think. My children have always been on the heavy side as toddlers, but we are a slim,active and healthy family so it's just that they haven't got that tiny build. If she eats healthily then at least she gets chubby on healthy stuff. I suspect many smaller children probably live on chips and turkey twizzlers and it just hasn't started to show yet.....

If she's in proportion with her height then she's not fat. Perhaps that's why they can't see it.

If you're concerned about her weight, or about the amount she eats, get the HV to have a look at her. If she is overweight then you may need to limit what she eats, and set very firm ground rules with both her dad and her grandparents.

They have to tow the line if you feel very strongly about it. After all she's your child and not theirs. Can you explain how you feel when she's not there? ie. not at the moment when they're actually giving the biscuits?

Her grandparents, I mean

Beat me to it G76, they are your kids and you need to put your foot down with grandparents and dad whether she is overweight or not as you are obviously concerned about it.

He's just a shit, I once said could he please take her to McDonalds only once a month and always give fruit juice or water as drinks as she loves both. That day she had all 3 meals at McDonalds and told me that 'Daddy gave me Coke'

The grandparents, I've tried but I'm not there so it seems to just get ignored.

She is BIG, like I said, she's not obese. I find it hard to carry her more than 100 yards she so heavy and no t-shirts ever fit properly.

The amount of milk she drinks probably doesn't help either.

Mascaraohara, my dd is both very tall and pretty heavy - think she is over 99th for height and between 75th and 91st for weight. there is a website where you can calculate a child's bmi (will have a search for it if I can) but wouldn't worry if your dd is active and eats healthily. if she is eating unhealthy foods then I would be more worried.

oh, dear - just saw your last post. three meals in one day at McDonalds is truly horrendous. can you not give her a packed lunch to take when she sees her dad, then tell him to take her for a bowl of pasta somewhere for tea?

how much milk does she drink?

It sounds as if your Dd is just a bit on the larger side than most girls her age. And as you said she has size 10 feet and she is only 3. That sounds to me as if she is in proportion to the rest of her body. My Ds was always between 91st and 98th centile and people always commented on how big he was for his age. He is now a super slim 6yr old.

I think its about 1pint of full fat milk a day that is ok. This is for calcium and protein. Anymore than this I think I would cut it down.

tell her dad and grandparents that the crap diet makes her constipated, and her bum bleeds, so she has to eat loads of fruit and veg or she'll have to go to the dr and have a supposatory(sp).

That should make them feel guilty enough not to do it!