'too thin' to menstruate?

[InMyLittleHead]

Have alluded to this in a v. roundabout way on Chat, but thought this was the best place for it really.

Basically, af is maybe 3 or 4 days late. I've got a copper coil, so it isn't that likely that I'm pg (don't want to be) although I haven't done a test. DP doesn't think I'm pg for some reason (probably wishful thinking) but thinks it's to do with my weight. I'm 7st 7, BMI is 17.7. I went down from about 8st 5 maybe 18 months ago, af has been fine since then, until now. What do you think, is it weight related?

I don't think 4 days late is hugely significant tbh. Stress can cause this, but so can weight loss. How do you feel about your weight loss? And why does it occur to you that it could be weight related? Do you think your weight has become an issue for you? fwiw, if you get too thin, or even have disordered eating (I was a normal-weight bulimic for many years and my af packed up completely) your body starts to shut down non vital functions to conserve energy.
Just seen that it's your DP that has brought up the weight issue (and now think I have been on another of your threads iirc). Am I right in thinking you don't want to put weight back on?

Do you have an eating disorder?

IMLH - I saw/posted on your other thread.

It seems to me as if there are some real issues about your weight.

You don't want to put weight on, but your DH is obviously worried about you and thinks you're too thin.

The fact that you have posted here in this way also suggests that it is a problem.

I doubt very much that being 3-4 days late means either that you're pregnant, or that you're too thin - but there is evidently a problem that you and your DH have to discuss and sort out.

Your BMI is very low. Your DH is clearly worried about you. You seem to refuse to accept that there's a problem. And therein lies the problem.

We can't sort it out for you. You have to talk to your DH about this.

Hmm. Not wanting to put weight on doesn't mean I have an eating disorder. I don't do anything like starve, take laxatives or make myself sick. I don't even think I'm too fat, I just don't want to put on weight.

DP has admitted he think's I'm a bit too thin for his own personal taste, but hasn't said anything about health until this af thing, and he is a doctor. But as I'm late he did say, well maybe it's because of your weight.

Me posting on here isn't evidence of having a problem. I just wanted other people's opinions.

I have no clue about BMI so cant comment on yours Inmy. I was very thin throughout my teens and early 20s (5'7" and between 6.5 - 7 st). It didnt appear to affect my periods at all.

I didnt have an eating disorder as such. I didnt think I was fat. I was just uninterested in food and had a small appetite.

I have to say now I am bigger I realise how much better I feel and look. Its only when I see old photos of myself that I think blimey I was skinny!

People often accused me of being anorexic and it did get on my nerves a fair bit.

You're seeking validation from us - complete strangers - that your (low) weight is OK. But you're married to someone who is evidently worried about your weight.

Why would you want to listen to us and not to him? Especially if he's a doctor?

Periods stopping is very often connected to low weight - there isn't a specific BMI at which it will happen, as it is related more directly to your body fat than the BMI itself. But I would say it is almost ertainly caused by your low weight - even if you have had the same weight for 18 months your body fat has probably dipped further and that's what is causing it.

Put bluntly, it is your body's way of saying that it can't manage with your current weight and fat level and it's having to stop all unnecessary actions to enable you to keep going at all. Your body would not be able to sustain a pregnancy with your current build, so your body stops you from ovulating to prevent you from getting pregnant, as you would not be able to carry it to term without endangering yourself and the baby.

Please go and see a doctor and/or nutritionist to talk about your weight and diet - this is your body trying to tell you that there's a problem. Listen to it, even if you won't listen to your husband.

A BMI of 17.7 is below the normal 19 - 25 range that is recommended as healthy. Here is a good BMI calculator designed for women. Put in your age and height and weight and see what your idea should be. The percentile data in the comparisons are American so you will appear very underweight compared to the US population.

Your DH is worried and trying in a gentle way to suggest to you that you need to put some weight on. I would be too. My own DW has dropped from a size 12 to a size 8 dress in 12 months. We think it is because she is approaching menopause but she is not deliberatley trying to lose weight and she is monitoring it carefully. It is possible to lose weight naturally for hormonal reasons. However, weight loss can also be an indicator of other medical problems (not necessarily anorexia) and it should not be ignored. Any GP would be concerned about why you are losing weight and have such a low BMI.

I can understand why you do not want to be fat but perhaps one way to put weight on in a healthy way is to build muscle by doing anaerobic exercise (weight lifting) at a gym and eating plenty of protein and vegetables/fruit rather than just stodge and snacks. It also good for your bones to do weight bearing exercise to prevent osteoperosis later in life.

Do look into getting a gym membership and rebuilding your body in a healthy way. There are often special offers at Xmas and it might be a nice Xmas present. Do a few sessions with a personal trainer at the gym (choose a female trainer) and explain what you want to achieve. Ask them to design you a programme and have a review after 6 months. You do not need a personal trainer every week just a couple of sessions to get you started.

I MEANT: "see what your ideal weight should be"

Based on the data you have given. Your BMI was about 19.5 when you were 8st 5lb about 18 months ago before your recent weight loss. That was OK for someone with a light build and maybe set that as your target weight to build back to.

I would talk to your GP though.

you need to do a body fat reading too. Its difficult to tell otherwise when your very low weight is causing infertility. You need a minimum level of body fat in order to help produce enough oestrogen to ovulate (having a period is no indication of ovulation).

"I don't do anything like starve, take laxatives or make myself sick" - thats no guaratnee you don;t have an eating disorder (which I have no idea by the way) an eating disorder is in the mind. What is your attitude to food, do you see it as something neutral or something which has emotion invested in it. etc.

It does seems slightly odd that you would be happier at a weight that the majority of people would consider very underweight. But some professional athletes have very low BMI like paula radcliffe - if you are in that category and you get plenty of weight bearing exercise (to help prevent osteoporosis) then I see no problem, though to answer you original question it could still mean that you are not ovulating because of your lack of body fat.

PS - agree with SantacluaseI'mworthit

How tall are you?

I used to weigh as little as 7st 4lbs and have now crept up to 8st and feel fat! My ideal weight is around 7st 9-10lbs.

I have plenty of rolls round my middle. I am tiny build and about 5' 3" tall. My BMI is 19.5 now but has been 18.5 and was considered healthy enough by my dr when I was weighed for other reasons.

So, being the weight you are is not necessarily dangerous, it depends on whether you feel too thin- certainly a BMI of 17.5 puts you at risk of osteoporosis later in life.

The question is- why have you lost weight? Under eating? over exercisisng? was it intentional or just a combination of a busy lifestyle?

You could put more weight on by building muscle as another poster has said- you wouldn't look fat but would be healthier.

Re. periods if you get very underwight, yes they will stop- but you don't seem to have got that far yet.

I'm 5ft 4. My only real exercise is walking everywhere which probably turns out at about 4 miles a day, so not too bad. But I don't do any exercise 'on purpose' IYKWIM. Gyms bore me.

Santa : Complete strangers = objective. Isn't that why many people post on MN, to get an objective viewpoint? And although DP is a doctor, he is not a perfect being. When I said, OK how would you feel if I was 9 st then? (which is still a healthy BMI) he said 'Oh no, you'd be too big then'. Which is what makes me think his 'concern' is mostly about me not having the perfect body shape for him rather than my health.

You sound a bit bad-tempered. Go and have a bacon buttie.

Is food really not an issue to you then? WHat did you eat yesterday?

@ BitofFun

4-5 days late is not very late.

If your period still doesn't come then you are either pregnant or you are having health problems.

Why don't you go speak to a doctor about it? A different doctor, one who is not interested in the attractiveness of yuor body shape.

Yesterday: an omelette, baked potato with bacon, some Quality Street, some fishcakes in sweet chilli sauce with green beans.

I think it is weird that you want complete strangers to agree with you that your weight is just fine. Your DH thinks you are too thin. Your BMI is telling you that you are too thin. You are too thin.

You may not be throwing up or taking laxatives but I bet you eat tiny childlike portions and are immensely please with yourself that you are a size 6.

See a doctor and get this sorted.

I'm a bit at the few posters who try to make out you have an eating disorder.

I was similarly treated when I posted a while back and included details of my weight- and I had to be careful what I ate, and only ate about 50% of what I would really like to eat (otherwise I'd be a Telly Tubby.) People put 2 and 2 together and made 6- assuming that because I weighed not a lot and also was careful over my diet, then I must have eating issues.

I think it comes down to your body mass and your fat levels- have you got any "fat scales" which measure you fat levels? You should be around 20-25% fat as a non-athlete.

Also, how do you LOOK? Is you face thin and gaunt? Do you have a covering of fat around your middle and hips, or are you ribs and bones very prominent?

IMLH- looking at what you ate yesterday, it's not much or the right food tbh. There is no dairy or anything to give you calcium, and not enough of your 5 pieces of fruit and veg a day.

I am trying to lose 4lbs and yesterday I ate breakfast- boiled egg and 1 piece toast, lunch homemade veg(lots of ) and chicken soup, oatcake with humous, 4 dried organic apricots, mid day, apple, dinner homemade fish cake, carrots and peas, 1 (naughty) choc digestive, and a pot of blueberry yogurt.

I think you need to start snacking if you want to put weight on- adding in yoghurts, humous, more fruit, more carbs.

Yesterday was a bad example. But there was a lot of cheese in the omelette because I am aware of calcium being important, osteoporosis etc. I also didn't leave the house yesterday because I was working, so didn't do any exercise to make me hungry.

How big are your portions?

I was tryign to find your previous thread about your bmi, but I noticed I've been on another thread of yours too (not stalking you, honest) about anxiety. Do you think your anxiety is maybe a factor in how you feel about your weight? I know years ago when I had very bad anxiety I really did become very focused on my body and weight as a thing I could control, as panic attacks made me feel out of control iyswim.

I would say my portions are normal-sized, which isn't very helpful! I make as much as I think I'll eat.

badietbuddy you're not stalking me? Ah I felt important then, like Princess Diana. No, tbh I don't think the panic attacks thing is relevant. I've had them years since I was 14 and they don't really bother me any more, I know what they are and although they are horrible I don't dread having them or anything because I know they can't hurt me. So it's not panic disorder or anything.

A BMI of 17.5 does not sound healthy to me. That doesn't necessarily mean it is causing your period to be late, though. I think you'd need to have a succession of irregular or absent periods before you could realistically start linking this to your weight. And if this is one of several irregular periods, I am quite certain that your dh is not going to be the only doctor suggesting that being underweight is the problem.