Continued support for SPHINCTER INJURIES, FISTULAE and other CHILDBIRTH INJURIES - the Ragged Bits Thread

[Jacksmama]

Hi all,
old thread here.

Cyee started this thread in May 2008 after her op, and it's been a haven of support for so many of us who have injuries to our bits from childbirth. Especially with respect to sphincter injuries, fistulae and incontinence after childbirth, there seems to be such a lack of support for women, and the entire subject seems to be taboo. It's as if most MD's think that "a certain amount of damage is to be expected after birth and you just have to live with it". Well, that is simply not the case - and this attitude is unacceptable.

There are all kinds of Ragged Bits stories on this thread. Be aware that THERE IS NO "TMI" HERE - this is the one place where you can spill it all. If you read through the old thread, which is nearly full, you'll see that someone, somewhere, has probably experienced it - whatever it is! So don't be embarrassed or ashamed... we'll tell our poo stories if you'll tell yours.

And also - there are success stories here. Several of us who have been through the medical mill have been successfully "repaired" and are "fully functional", so to speak or even expecting again. In those cases, please join us for Pervwatch - the "after action" report for anyone who is once again venturing into marital relations!

Welcome everyone. We're sorry you had to find us, but we're glad you're here.

Luceeloo - welcome and HECK, what a few months you've had?? You are clearly a very strong lady.
Movicol was also a very very good friend of mine both during pregnancy. I get fissures... they really hurt, don't they?
I'm so glad you have already had the surgery - have you been put in contact with a physio? For what it's worth - my urge to go has lessened over time and post-surgery and after physio. It apparently can take a fairly long time for the pelvic floor area to fully recover - after my sugery I didn't notice the difference immediately but it did come and keeping your pelvic floor working (with the right advice) will probably really help.
Take care of yourself and good on you for going through all of this as a single mum. You are definitely not alone, keep posting. :)

And congrats on your daughter :)

Hi Luceeloo - I'm so sorry you've had such an awful time. Welcome, sorry you had to find us but we're glad you did.

I have another sigmoidoscopy scheduled for this morning - cheers, I love having my bum probed , but will ask lovely surgeon to check for a fissure.
Anyone want to (virtually) hold my hand in an hour and a half? :)

Hi cyee - thank you for such a lovely reply! Yes I've seen a physio 3 times since the birth (twice post op). In fact I saw her on Thursday and when she examined me she said my pelvic floor was pretty good, but the back wall where I had the rectocele repair was very sensitive. Apparently I need to desensitise the area. Hmm?! I'm seeing the consultant at the hospital I gave birth at for a rather belated debrief of my maternity notes on Monday. Not entirely sure what the point is, I figure I've had nearly 7months of hell what do you honestly want to talk about?! But will ask about the pain then. Bit awkward however, as its a different consultant from the one who restitched me. So I don't really want to play one off on the other.

Jack - Excuse my ignorance but what is a sigmoidoscopy? I've had an endoanal ultrasound with a probe covered in a seemingly giant condom up my bum, is that the same thing?!

hope it goes ok. More later :)

A sigmoidoscopy ia when they stick a flexible tube up your bum to look at everything from the anus up through the rectum and into the sigmoid colon, which is the last part of the large intestine. Yes, it's as much fun as it sounds

It's official, I have a fissure. They showed it to me on the screen and asked if I wanted a picture to keep. What???? No!! What am I supposed to do with it, put it on my iphone and show it off when I show pictures of Jackbaby?? LOL.

I have to say... ... I'm always so disconcerted seeing this doctor, he's ridiculously scrummy. Not in a classically handsome kind of way, but very cute. I hate that the first thing he sees when he comes in is my bum .

But come to think of it, I bet that's how DH's clients feel when they have to walk in front of him in shorts and sports bra so he can check their posture and gait (he does Rolf Structural Integration, it's a type of deep tissue work).

Because DH is rather scrummy himself. :o

Ack. I'm back at work for the afternoon and there is an awful lot of air rumbling around in my insides from the scope... this could be interesting...

Luceeloo - good luck with your appt on Monday. Let us know their plans for desensitisation?! I am still really quite sensitive where I had my op. I have heard that sometimes you can get creams that help, think it might have been oestrogen cream? Anyway - I'd be very interested in any tips you get :)

Oh Jacksmama - clench! Or.. what I sometimes have had to do is head to the disabled loo and do a bit of back arching and downward dogging. Helps move things along. You poor thing. **

LOL at your scrummy doctor! I'm sure your doc thinks you have a great bum . I have a weird fixation on my colorectal guy - he's not at all scrummy I just think maybe it's the power to heal or something! Your DH's job sounds interesting.. other than the knicker parade bit.

Off to bed - nighty night all!

Good morning all (morning in my time zone). Just wanted to report, for the first time in quite a while, I'm actually feeling pretty good. Good enough, in fact, that I'm contemplating some pervwatch action in the next few days. :o There is one stitch in the left labia that feels like it's going to come out soon but the rest of my poor abused bits feels astonishingly good.

Cyee, when you had your fissure, how did you end up getting it to heal? I've been prescribed diltiazem cream. It's too early to tell (except for the amusing fact that it feels quite, ahem, warm when I put it where it belongs... in a quite pleasant way... :o) but I've been v v v diligent with fibre intake and water and things have gone, errr, a little more smoothly IYKWIM.

How's everyone else?

Morning Jacksmama, it was Lactulose that did it for me in the end (plus all the fibre, water stuff). It just kept everything pretty soft and allowed it to heal. My friend is a GP (MD) and she mentioned there's a cream that basically relaxes the sphincter allowing any fissure that might be right there to heal. At the time I was very anti the prospect of encouraging my sphincter 'relax' any further than it was IFYKWIM. But maybe to that's the cream you have?

More importantly - PERVWATCH! It's fab that you're considering activities of that nature. Brilliant!! :)

For anyone who wants to know, Lactulose is rather... errrmm... powerful...

Hello, can I join please? I had DD 9 weeks ago and this morning realised I have a rectocele when I could feel the bulge at the entrance to my vagina and I also think I have a cystocele as the bladder is bulging too, but not as bad. I had a prolonged 2nd stage 2.5 hours followed by forceps and a 2nd degree tear. I've bought a tens pelvic floor toner. Is there any hope this will help or do I need medical help? Also I have a lump on my inner labia...great. Many thanks in advance for any words of wisdom. I feel rather upset by it all.

Hi Elsa, congratulations on your DD! Sorry you had such a crap delivery... can I say I feel your pain? :(

I'd suggest trying the pelvic floor toner first. 9 weeks post-partum all your pelvic floor muscles are still really really lax, so I'd think all a medical professional would tell you is to wait until DD is 6 months old and see what's happening. Unless of course anything is actually falling out of your vagina... in that case, go see your GP immediately, obviously.

I think the lump on your inner labia is most likely to be a haematoma - a blood clot, essentially. I had one. It made my right labia the size of a plum. If you have time, try hot Epsom salt sitz baths to increase circulation in the area which will help to break down the clotted blood, and then very gently massaging the lump - this will also help to break up the clotted blood so it can be reabsorbed. If it gets bigger or won't go away, do have it checked - sometimes a blood clot needs to be incised and drained. Which sounds horrible, but is actually really not painful, only uncomfortable.

Welcome to the Ragged Bits thread. Sorry you had to find us... but we're glad you did! xxJM

Welcome Elsa123 - I don't have much to add to Jacksmama's wise words. Except that perhaps it's worth mentioning the situation to your GP (if you haven't already?) just in case there are waiting lists that you need to get on - for the physio etc. Better cancel an appointment that you don't need than have to wait ages when you realise you need to see them. I have no personal experience of the Tena machine you mention however I do think these machines are at their best when you have professional help using them. I learned a lot about how to properly do pelvic floor exercises, and all about the importance of little and often because the pelvic floor is so easily exhausted i.e. if you keep on working it you're not getting the benefit. So it's worth considering. Oh and the physios also do have other devices that help as well and they can loan these out.

If you are feeling really anxious about it (and I know it's horrible stuff) I would recommend seeing your doc - sometimes just reassurance that you're doing everything that can be done does help.

Take care and many congratulations on the birth of your daughter!

Cyee
PS Jacksmama - OMG yes Lactulose is strong stuff - moderate your intake!!! :)

Elsa123 - I mean physios when I refer to 'professional help' - mine were specialists in womens health and all round legends in my eyes.

thank you both so much. the lump is hard and white but not like a spot. It also hurts intermittantly. I've just had a look and the rectocele is like a balloon at the entrance to my vagina and the whole site looks 10 times worse than it did a few weeks ago. I'm going to make an appt with the GP about it to see if I can get the 'professional help'. Sorry for the lack of caps, bfing DD .

Haha :) Nice multitasking. I was never able to do anything other than feed - good on you!

I have an appt for tomorrow with a GP- not at my medical centre as they don't have any female GPs and are closed til mid jan! Its occured to me that this seems to have happened literally overnight. I also think I have a prolapse of the urethra. Joy.

Hi all! Quick message I'm afraid will come back later. Saw consultant for maternity debrief yesterday. I said I was a bit sore and he said the more sex I have the better I'll be! Been seeing a new guy and have told him all about my ragged bits for which he's been amazing. So when I told him docs orders he was more than happy to oblige although perhaps a tad freaked out that I just so happened to have an industrial sized tube of ky in my handbag! But I can report that although still uncomfortable, he was actually able to penetrate me and err finish! So clearly doc was right, regular sex it is. Dammit! :) baby is awake, be back later

Luceeloo - ROFL!! :)

:o

Pervwatch report - we tried it last night and I was still too sore. I feel like the doc sewed me up a bit tighter than I was before . No, seriously, he sewed up the episiotomy cut through my right labia and where I tore in the back right where the labia come together, so no wonder things felt a bit snug. But it was exactly 6 weeks since the op (they said to wait 6-8 weeks but the timing was accidental :o) and I think we'll wait a week or so before trying again.
Anyway, it, ahem, went in, but was too painful so we switched gears, so to speak. DH was a happy man :o

Hi everyone. Wondered if I could join this thread? Had forceps delivery with episiotomy after 3 hours of pushing during my beautiful daughters delivery 10 days ago. Initially had a lot of discomfort from piles but realised that my wound was breaking down as well a week later. Have seen obs consultant who has recommended packing and allowing the episiotomy wound to heal from the bottom up but packing not staying in! Have also had no control over my bowels since delivery - initially constipated but now get only a few seconds warning before opening my bowels - have had one very embarrassing situation whilst out already. The report says I only had second degree damage but I am sure my anal sphincter must have been damaged (?).
Any help or advice appreciated - should I be asking for a colorectal and physio referral asap? Does anyone have experience of this situation (no obvious prolapse and no urinary probs)?
Thank you for your help, I am getting quite upset.

Her Ladyship is having her afternoon nap, so time to catch up!

Mollmum - Congrats on your daughter! 10 days postnatal is very early days but any level of incontinence should def be checked out. You poor poor thing. Has the obs consultant not suggested an endoanal ultrasound scan? Highly invasive but it can check for any internal/external damage to the sphincter. What packing do you have?

Jack - Pervwatch! Love that! Go you for trying at 6weeks post op! I was told to wait 8-12 weeks after mine but actually left it 15 but it was AGONY. Waited another fortnight and he was actually able to ahem, get up there! I too felt really tight, literally like I was losing my V-plates again .

Elsa - Jack and Cyee have clearly said very helpful things. I really feel for you, I had a rectocele repair during my perineal revision, though I didnt actually have any prolapse symptoms so I really do feel for you my love. Let us know what doc says. I know nothing about the toner, but Women's Health Physios are brill.

Cyee - How are you today!?

Must go, gotta start wrapping! Off to see new man tonight before he drives up North for Xmas. We're present exchanging, this should be interesting!

Merry Christmas everyone!

I hope everyone is as well as possible, and having a great day!