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General health

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Original poster

Vasectomy.

18 replies

WorzselMummage · 10/06/2009 10:41

My Df is considering having it done but is scared shitless slightly aprehensive.

Anyone got any experience to share ?

I am not sure how i feel about it.

OP posts:

whomovedmychocolate · 10/06/2009 22:21

I have just convinced Dh to get one. He hasn't had it yet so can't tell you that bit but can let you know that all he need do is go see the GP and they don't want to see his bits or ask any untoward questions other than 'are you sure and is your partner in agreement'.

If you don't agree with it, don't bloody do it, there are lots of forms of contraception and you will regret it and it come between you if you aren't both sure. Go see the family planning service - not just for teenagers you know

mrsmaidamess · 10/06/2009 22:24

Have it done.It's the best thing we ever did.(contraceptive wise,that is)

whomovedmychocolate · 10/06/2009 22:26

I'm glad you said contraception wise otherwise I would have been deeply worried about your hobbies

CandleQueen · 10/06/2009 22:27

Our best friends decided their family was complete with 3 DC, so the DH went for The Big V.
He said it was uncomfortable, like a filling at the dentist's, but not as bad as he had anticipated.
They both say that it's the best thing for them contraception wise.

BettyTurnip · 10/06/2009 22:28

Once you've made your mind up that you're both all for it, then go for it!! Honestly. It's wonderful being spared any anxiety about accidents and such things. It was all very straightforward for DH, no problems whatsoever.

mrsmaidamess · 10/06/2009 22:37

My dh swears it made his todger grow by at least 2 inches. I remain unconvinced.

mistymee · 10/06/2009 23:05

My DH had a vasectomy a couple of years ago. There was a long waiting list at our GPs and he eventually got an appointment through for the procedure to be carried out three months later. DH was OK with that as he said he had a few months to get used to the idea of having it done . Anyway, whilst I was on the phone to the docs one day shortly after receiving the appointment letter, I just happened to mention that DH would be happy to have it done sooner if they ever had a cancellation and wanted to fill the space as it were. The next day the docs rang to ask if DH would like to have it done in three days time as there was indeed a cancellation. So in the end DH didn't get his three month build up to it but he now thinks that was a good thing as he didn't have time to get too worked up/stressed about it.

The procedure went well. He had some discomfort (easy for me to say I know) for two or three weeks but no problems since.

Original poster

WorzselMummage · 11/06/2009 10:15

I am glad it doesnt sound to bad, I didnt think it was that much of a big deal really. I think he's as worried about having to show his bits to all and sundry as the actual surgery, men eh.

It's not that I don't agree with it really, I KNOW we cannot have any more children for health reasons ( both pregnancies awfull, both babies very prem )although if i am honest i'd love another, i know we'd be stupid to do it. Df is adament there wont be another baby so i am sure they won't but vasectomy seems so very final, we're not even 30 yet !

I have a coil at the moment but i don't think Df trusts it and our sex life is non existant, if it's going to tke a vasectomy to give is a bit of normality back then i suppose it's for the best.

OP posts:

summer111 · 12/06/2009 20:00

dh had one last year - he called it my 40th birthday present
He is someone who shivers at the smell of antispetic so I really wasn't sure how he'd cope with it all. I have to say it really was a walk in the park - he even says so now - and much less painful than he expected. He had the procedure in the morning and I picked him up that lunchtime ...he was fit enough to cook dinner that evening! He really only had a bit of discomfort for a few days, which was relieved by paracetamol. What he found the most uncomfortable was the itch he experienced as his pubes grew back - necessitating lots of secretive scratching behind his desk at work

BettyTurnip · 12/06/2009 21:54

DH's was done at a GP surgery whilst I sat and watched!

dontdillydally · 12/06/2009 22:14

30 is very, very young in my opinion. You may want another dd/ds in a couple of years? I met my hubby and we had our ds when I was 38 he was 45. He has 2 dd from previous and was glad he didnt have a vas as we wouldnt have our ds now.

Why not keep with the coil for a little while I think 30 is very young to make such a drastic decision

ABetaDad · 12/06/2009 22:28

WorzselMummage - it is only fair that you and your Df should know that sometimes the operation is not as straightforward as men are often led to believe. Most are just fine but not always.

On a thread a while ago on MN a female poster reported her husband had suffered continuous pain in his testicles thereafter. I recall, another reported very severe bruising and trauma and a requirement for further operations.

There is always risk in an operation and your Df should ask about those so he can make an informed decision. This NHS web link is typical of the way that the complications are presented as infrequent and relatively minor.

I offered to have it done a few years ago and DW has said no. However, after reading various MN threads and outlining the possible severity (albeit relatively rare) of the complications I must admit I now feel I would be less happy. If DW really wanted/needed me to have it done I would of course still do so.

BettyTurnip · 12/06/2009 22:54

Well yes, but other contraception can have side effects and complications also. The coil, the method the OP is currently using, is associated with an increased risk of ectopic pregnancy for example.

ABetaDad · 13/06/2009 07:30

BettyTurnip - yes I agree. Discussing the side effects in other forms of contraception and balancing the probabilities and severity is always difficult and it does need to be an informed choice.

Before I started really loooking into it my own perception of vasectomy was that that it is was a riskless procedure and hence my offer to DW to have it done. Far preferable in my view than expecting DW to take contraceptive pills or have the coil fitted.

DW felt differently. She was diagnosed and treated for ovarian cancer about a decade ago and is in remission now under more or less continuous monitoring still. She is worried that if it did come back and she died that I might want to have another child in a new relationship with a younger woman and does not want to prevent that happening.

We use condoms and although an accidental pregnancy would be inconvenient and exhausting it does not pose a big health risk to DW so we live with the compromise.

Of course the other risk with vasectomy is it is not 100% certain to be effective. Each couple needs to balance the risks according to their circumstances. In our case, I would still certainly have a vasectomy without delay if for some reason pregnancy suddenly began to pose a health risk to DW.

lambanana · 13/06/2009 17:10

Dh had his at the GP's surgery. He had his tubes lasered which is the new way some GP's are doing it.

He had it done first thing in the morning, slept for the rest of the day and skived took the following day off.

Happy to report no ill effects and a much more spontaneous sex life!

pagwatch · 13/06/2009 17:14

DH booked his as soon as I became pregnant with what would knew would be our last child.
Whilst of courese every procedure has its potential for compliactions he had no problems and very little discomfort.

He wanted to take responsibilty for contraception as he felt fair's fair _ I had handled it for the fisrt 20 years of our relationship .
His view on the risks were that he was no more vulnerable than I had been taking the pill etc and then carrying three children...

TheFallenMadonna · 13/06/2009 17:33

DH was willing, eager even, to have one. And then he read something in the Sunday Times, did a bit more research, and now he won't. And we are at a bit of an impasse really. Because I really, really don't want to get pregnant again. I've had bad pregnancies, lost pregnancies, eventful deliveries and ongoing physical problems and I really, really don't want to do it again. But I have never had any difficulty getting pregnant. I fret. I am considering making an appointment to ask about sterilisation, but I also worry I will resent having to do that. It's a bugger...

nikki1978 · 13/06/2009 18:40

My DH had his done 3 and a half weeks ago. Went to a local GP surgery (not ours) where a doctor did it on the NHS. He was in there for 45 mins and said it was fine. Just a bit uncomfortable when they were tugging the tubes. He stayed in bed for a couple of days as any swinging movement was painful. My DH used homeopathy instead of ibuprofen and paracetemol and was fine except for a few aches and pains after the first night. He has had no problems since. Still as sexual as before, no probs with erections, no pain after the first week.

Just having sex as much as poss now to get the left over sperm out before the test in August!

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