DD has chicken pox; do I still go to the ball?

[Hulababy]

Had to happen really as a fair few of her nursery friends have had them or currently have them, including her best friend. She was fine this morning - although I did only see her very briefly to give her a quick kiss and cuddle before I went off to work. DH showered and dressed her and she was fine.

But he got a phone call this afternoon from nursery, ad the satff said that they though she had chicken pox. They'd seen a few spots, a couple with blisters. But she was in good spirits and happy with herself, so no need to collect her early.

So, DH did pick her up a bit early anyway and brought her home. When I got back I thought I would have a look - and true enough her front and bak, her neck, hair line and her bottom have quite a lot of spots on them. They are even in her "bits" too Think they are starting to itch a bit too, but she definitely isn't poorly - laughing and running about, talking non stop.

She's in bed now.

But tomorrow afternoon I am supposed to be having my hair highlighted and my eye brows waxed. My dad is supposed to be coming over to look after her for the hour or two it will take.

And Saturday night me and DH have tickets for a ball. We paid a fair bit of money for them, and have had it planned for weeks. My mum and dad are supposed to be babysitting.

But do I go to these two things?

How will DD be by then? At the moment she isn't poorly - is she likely to start to feel poorly?

Oooh - and now I just feel all itchy everywhere!

My dad has had shingles in the past, so not worried there. My parents are also not very old. Is that what you mean? Or do you mean me or DH carrying the virus? But then we couldn't go anywhere and that is not practical at all.

ope your little one is better soon.

Must be the time of year for it or something?

Yes!

Yes, I did mean that, but then again, you don't have to be very old to get shingles. I also meant passing the virus on elsewhere. We were supposed to be going to a VE celebration where everyone will be dressed in 40's gear and quite a few will be old. In addition, lots of people from school will be there and will know what DS has. I had thought that none of us will be going anywhere unnecessarily for about a week just as a matter of courtesy. We'll be offering 'the pox' to those families who want to get it over with early, but apart from that, it's common practice to keep your distance.

But what about work? Getting food?

DH and me can't just take a week off work DH certainly can't. And aren't children at their cost infectious just before the spots come out anyway - so most of the damage is done in the week beforehand.

They are infectious just before the spots come out, but more so when the spots are out and before they dry up and scab, (from a very reliable source).

Of course you still have to go to work and get food - you have to do the things you have to do, but keep it to a minimum and cut out what can be avoided. We've got 2 playdates planned for next week, but I'll be ringing first to see if they want it. One certainly won't, because she's got a new baby. I won't just be turning up as usual. I don't mean to offend you personally, but none of the posts from anyone mentioned other people - they were all focused on 'me' / 'us'.
I'm aware that Ds has probably spread it all over before his spots came out, but there are still stable doors that can be closed. They remain infectious until all the spots have developed scabs.

Both MIL and DD's great grandma had shingles quite bad last year. They were NOT exposed to chicken pox at the time. The GP said that shingles in NOT caused by people having chicken pox around you.

This is backed up on the net:

It is not caught from contact with someone with shingles or with chickenpox.

You can only get shingles (Herpes Zoster) if you have previously had chickenpox. After having chickenpox the virus lies dormant in the nerves, and shingles occurs when it is revitalised in one particular nerve to the skin, thus explaining the way it affects a clearly demarcated band of skin only.

Usually the cause is a decrease in your body's natural resistance, which may come through other infections, stress, being generally run down, or occasionally, when the body's immune defences are affected by certain drugs or other immune deficiencies.

Source: Medinfo.co.uk

And here too:

Shingles can affect adults and children, but is much more common in older people. It can not be triggered by contact with someone who has chickenpox.

Reactivation of the virus is more common in elderly people whose immune system is weakened. There are various possible causes of this:

conditions that affect the immune system, including HIV infection
periods of increased stress
excess alcohol intake
long term courses of steroids
chemotherapy or radiotherapy - cancer treatments
medicines used after organ transplants (immunosuppressants)

Source: BUPA

DD will be staying at home, as advised but DH and I will still go out for work, etc. And possibly for the ball too - my parents (and next week too PILs) are more than capable of looking after DD. I will stay with her if she is poorly and needs me, but not necessarily if she is just spotty and a bit itchy. It just isn't practical.

You've answered your own question then really, haven't you. You'll be going to the ball and the hairdressers and business as usual. Hope your poor hairdresser has had chicken pox.

Well possibly. Sorry, your post seems to read like I am being a bit callous and uncaring Not sure if it is me being oversensitive - I am ery stressed right now due to nightmare hosue moving issues. I hoep not anyway - DD is my one and only priority.

But, it does depends on if she gets poorly or not. At present she is not poorly at all with them.

My real question (in the original post, not thread title) is is she likely to get poorly? And how long will she be poorly for (IF)?

I ave no other little child and I can't remember the details from when I had it, hence asking the question.

I am somewhat taken aback that you believe that I (or DH) should not venture out my house in all this time. Sorry, but I have never heard this advice or recommendation before, hence my suprise.

Hula go out enjoy yourself. Go to work. Do all the normal stuff.

I didn't say that you shouldn't venture out at all. I've said twice now that you need to go to work, shopping, etc, it's just that going 'out' for fun is different. I'd love to do everything I planned at the weekend, but how would I feel if I bumped into someone who's pregnant, or some other compromised person? yes, I could bump into them while shopping, but that can't be helped. Socialising can be helped. We've been told to keep Ds off school for 6 days (imagine our surprise!) and this is school's policy. A couple of people I've spoken to on the phone have said, 'poor you having to stay in for a week', etc. It is common practice, hulababy, I'm not just making it up. You do what you have to do but avoid social gatherings if you can.

Thanks Clem

So, what do people normally do when their children have chicken pox, but are not ill with it?

Do they stay in all week or however long it takes?

Is that the norm? Have I missed some important info here (it just hasn't been the advise I have gotten elsewhere that's all)?

Talk about a guilt trip, eh?

There is no one in our party who is pg; that I am sure of. They are the only people I will be with closely all night IF I go.

My work involves a lot of one to one contact in a very enclosed environment - a prison in fact. That would, in fact, be a worse environment to be in I would think.

Hula - I also have never heard this advice before - and most certainly have never heard about that you should stop living your life to avoid passing shingles on and the info you have found online is what I've always known to be correct. You are of course, not a callous or uncaring person and anyone who knows you from here will know that. I do think though that your dd may well worsen and you will want to be prepared for that. The itching can be unbearable, and that in itself is enough to make them feel poorly.

I can understand DD not going into nursery; that bit was obvious to me. Nursery has a policy of waiting till the scabs are healed, which is what I thought. But that is for DD - not for me and DH.

Here's a good one for you then. Do I take his baby brother to the childminder as usual tomorrow and say nothing? Spots haven't come out on him yet, so i could get away with it. Bear in mind that she has a young baby. I'd be able to get on with my work with just DS1 on the sofa? Tempting or what?

when I was pg with my first baby and came in contact with chicken pox and shingles on two separate occasions I contacted my obs to check implicatiosn for me. he said there were none. (Correct me if he was wrong) Worst case scenario was that I would get shingles too. There is no danger to the baby. His words not mne.

Aero - that's the question I was asking really and I am prepared for that, and of course I will not go out if DD is poorly or uncomfortable and wants me there. Both DH and I agree on that - we will both stay home in that circumstances.

For 'baby brother', read 3 year old - just always think of him as the baby.

both me and DH have had Chicken pox when we were kids, and my parents both have had it and my dad had shingles about 7 years ago, so I can't pass th virus on if I don't have it and I certainly wouldn't be taking DS anywhere atm...

No yu don't droile. I suspect his brother has not had chicken pox yet, and may well be next in line for them. Therefore he could be very contagious.

Both DH and I have had chicken px and therefore are not liekly to be about to get chicken pox ourselves.

I'm getting confused here - Hula have you and dh already had chicken pox - if so you shouldn't be getting it again, so why not go out and about?

posts crossed