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Original poster

Handhold if anyone’s around? Scan yesterday at 5pm, GP called this morning

520 replies

GiveOverWillYou · 21/11/2025 11:05

Wondering if anyone has any experience/insights?
Late 40s, on HRT. Cycle usually still rock solid, horrendously heavy, except for last few (2-3) months - spotting, random bleeds, periods when not due. Bit of pelvic discomfort.
Went to GP, but kind of hoped assumed it was the beginning of the end of periods and just the timing going haywire/and to find out how I should be taking progesterone as had previously been on that Day 15-28 and cycle being out of whack meant that that regime was going to be hard to do. GP said she could feel something on the left hand side. Recent CA125 was fine, recent smear was clear ‘but cervix is very red’. My cervix has always defied medical science (that’s another story) so wasn’t unduly worried. They upped progesterone to 200mg daily, put me on the 2 week wait for internal/external US. It’s been 5 weeks 😬but I had the US last night after 5 o’clock. Sonographer was rummaging around for ages (over 30 mins) and made a point of saying the GP will be in touch, but if they aren’t, you must contact them. I know they usually can’t/don’t say much. Told myself that it was good that the tests have been done and that I’d hear in due course, not to worry in the meantime. Then this morning I have had 3 calls from the GP before 10am, which I missed as was in a work meeting with phone off. I called them back and they asked me to come in at noon. So now of course I am absolutely shitting myself, and have self-diagnosed with every gynae cancer going.
Don’t know what I’m asking for really, other than a handhold, and if anyone has had similar happen and it turned out to be something that wasn’t nefarious. I feel lucky that at least I find out what’s going on this morning but the speed at which they’ve followed up is terrifying me 😧Speculation of course, but I can’t help but feel that if this was, I dunno, fibroids, there wouldn’t be this level of urgency this morning

OP posts:
TheRosesAreInBloom · 17/12/2025 07:48

Sending love and thoughts and all the luck I can muster, over the airways OP.

Whatever the results tomorrow (and I hope so much they are the best results they can be), remember, YOU’VE got this! Your inner strength shines through your lovely writing.

All good wishes from Worcestershire x

PrizedPickledPopcorn · 17/12/2025 07:53

It’s a bugger, isn’t it?!
If I were your friend, it would be absolutely fine to say, “Got something I need to tell you. I want serious heart to heart about it. I’d like to skip the ‘one step at a time, you never know, I’m sure it will be fine’ crap please!”.

💐I hope the results come fast and friendly. Feel no shame about insurance. Insurance and people using it is not the cause of our NHS being shit these days.

olderandnonthewiser · 17/12/2025 08:01

Ah OP like so many others I have looked often for an update.. thank you.
Also like so many others I’m sending you every handhold, good wish and positive thought I can muster xx

olderandnonthewiser · 17/12/2025 08:02

Oh and don’t feel any guilt about private appointments. IMO every private appointment is an NHS one left available for someone else waiting x

supersop60 · 17/12/2025 08:10

Handhold from me OP. Thinking about you today.

Horses7 · 17/12/2025 08:27

You are so awesome OP! Thank you so much for the update - so many of us are thinking about you and sending good wishes.

MelaniesLaugh · 17/12/2025 08:28

Sending love xx

PerriDowton · 17/12/2025 08:37

Thanks for the update. I appreciate the time you took to let us know.
Best wishes xx

Moonlightfrog · 17/12/2025 08:46

OP, you are doing amazingly. I totally get how hard the ‘waiting to find out what’s going on’ is like.
Almost 2 years ago I went for a biopsy of my uterine lining, they were unable to get past my cervix and gynaecologist said my uterus was the size of a 5 month pregnancy. I wasn’t offered a scan or anything and was fast tracked for hysterectomy. My whole world got turned upside down, being sole carer for a disabled teenager my fear was dying and my dd being alone. Whilst waiting for surgery I paid private for a scan which conformed my uterus was not the size of a 5 month pregnancy. Several small masses showed up on the scan (possible polyps). 2 weeks later my smear came back with abnormal cells so 2 weeks before surgery I was told I may have cervical cancer (or pre cancerous cells), luckily my results were rushed through and came back all clear 2 days before mr surgery.

As I managed to prove my uterus was normal size I managed to get my surgery changed to keyhole and managed to keep my ovaries. It is a big surgery but my recovery was pretty good and I am glad my uterus and cervix. 10 weeks after surgery I got the all clear (no cancer in my uterus or cervix).

The weeks leading up to my surgery were just a blur, I cried a lot, walked alone a lot (I love walking and being outdoors) and I did a lot of over thinking.

It is such a hard thing to deal with, not knowing, not being able to plan ahead. I had to keep telling myself “what will be will be and I will deal with it if/when it happens”.

I really hope you get good news and your outcome is as good as mine.

Coalday · 17/12/2025 08:51

I was in a similar situation nearly 3 years ago and GP prepared me for cancer and a full hysterectomy, but it turned out to be ok.

As women age they will often suggest a hysterectomy if they feel the potential for issues.

Wishing you well.
Goid GPs like to keep on top of these issues and not forget in their busy day, so that is likely why they kept ringing.
My lovely GP is the same.

Imdunfer · 17/12/2025 08:51

GiveOverWillYou · 17/12/2025 01:26

Hello ❤️

Thank you all for thinking of me ❤️

I’m sorry I’ve been a bit AWOL since I last posted. . . The past couple of weeks have been very surreal indeed and my head has been firmly implanted up my own arse.

I think I went into a bit of a hole really, not helped by the worry, the waiting and by the run-up to Christmas (which always gets me in the ‘feels’ anyway- bloody carols) and I had some of that Could-it-be-my-last-one fatalism. Felt like I was lurching moment-to-moment with fears/questions/random things to deal with (eg school runs with a DC obsessively playing a Jeff Buckley track on repeat that bangs on about feeling mud being put over your head (burial-style) - FFS - in dingy grey midwinter before I’ve had a shower - and a coffee) and also life in general (said DC has some struggles, I went down some very dark holes about dying and her being unequipped to navigate the world without me etc, other DC has a lot on at a key life stage etc)

I dropped some balls at work (at least I thought I had, apologised and fawned and then realised I hadn’t and should have stuck up for myself more 😬🙄) which sent me into a tailspin, it’s a newish job that I love and want to carry on doing, in my head I’d been sacked whilst terminally ill etc etc etc

They told me to lay off the oestrogel to avoid ‘feeding’ this bastard thing (still doesn’t have a name, maybe This Bastard Thing will do) so I’ve been plunged back into peri symptom hell to boot (see work meltdown above 🫣😬)

In short, I have had myself dead and buried (and also been given a new lease of life by eventual good news) about 86,000 times in the past couple of weeks.

It’s fucking exhausting. I think eventually the adrenaline ran down, and I have annoyed myself so much with scenario planning that I have finally internalised the ‘one step at a time’. .

DH has been brilliant, Service Love mode ongoing and he’s being solicitous and emotionally honest in a way that he isn’t habitually. He’s hiding the amount he has on at work and is keeping the wheels on a few familial carts I would usually be much more engaged with but just haven’t had the bandwidth.

I’ve been hiding a bit but a (very) few people know now, which has also been weird - every person I’ve told, it’s like it necessitates a round of ‘of-course-this-is-a-huge-worry-but we-must-take-one-step-at-a-time/face it/work it-out-come-what may’ and although I am hugely grateful for the concern (I know I sound like I’m not) and appreciative that there’s not much for it but platitudes when this happens and the situ is unclear, I’ve found the iteration of the same lines irritating, and like we should get it out the way so we can have an honest conversation. I’m conscious I sound like an ungrateful wretch.

I had the MRI. It was horrible. I’m very hardy usually but I cannot bear feeling trapped. I can’t even go in a sleeping bag. I was also raised to cope with things generally and not make a fuss (an approach I often joyously and wilfully ignore, but not in an NHS setting 😆) and I emerged with a banging headache, clenched jaw and had to get the hell out of there. . Couple of big gulpy breaths in the fresh air later I reminded myself of work I did once with some clinicians in Africa who were trying to ameliorate the suffering of people with terminal illnesses who had no access to diagnostics or treatment or even basic painkillers and got A Fucking Grip.

Thanks to some sage advice on here, I chased my GP to get some idea of when and how I should expect biopsy and MRI results (why?! Why is this even necessary?!?!!!) and have been told I should get biopsy ‘in about three weeks’ (so this week) and MRI imminently, they will call or write - couldn’t say which, or when 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬😬😬🙄🙄🙄🙄😳😳😳

DH has recently got health insurance via work so I have now also had a private US and another MRI to see what they say. I feel both relieved and extremely guilty about having access to that. I am a pretty strong advocate for myself and to be honest the NHS communication side has been woeful to say the least. I have an appointment to get those results tomorrow.

I remain hopeful that the grim fibroid option is most likely (🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 but 👍👍👍👍👍)

Any which way I look at it, it’s all going to have to come out, isn’t it - womb, ovary and tube on at least one side, then why not get the other ovary/tube out too. . I doubt they can get it out keyhole so I’m bracing for major surgery, come what may. . .

Thank you all again for your kindness and thoughts and for checking in ❤️❤️ The advice and love has helped keep me sane. I’ve re-read all the posts many times already ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Really sorry to hear about all this and so relieved that you have private care availability. Do not feel guilty using it, it's your life we're talking about here.

I hope the New Year soon shows you waving goodbye to TBT and that's the end of it. And that you can have a great Christmas in spite of it.

adaywithy · 17/12/2025 08:52

Only platitudes want to come out now so I’ll zip it. But wanted to send you the best wishes, you got this OP thinking of you

BrassOlive · 17/12/2025 09:17

You sound very emotionally literate OP, I've no doubt this will serve you well whatever comes your way in future. Sending you lots of positive wishes!

Bikergran · 17/12/2025 09:26

GiveOverWillYou · 17/12/2025 01:26

Hello ❤️

Thank you all for thinking of me ❤️

I’m sorry I’ve been a bit AWOL since I last posted. . . The past couple of weeks have been very surreal indeed and my head has been firmly implanted up my own arse.

I think I went into a bit of a hole really, not helped by the worry, the waiting and by the run-up to Christmas (which always gets me in the ‘feels’ anyway- bloody carols) and I had some of that Could-it-be-my-last-one fatalism. Felt like I was lurching moment-to-moment with fears/questions/random things to deal with (eg school runs with a DC obsessively playing a Jeff Buckley track on repeat that bangs on about feeling mud being put over your head (burial-style) - FFS - in dingy grey midwinter before I’ve had a shower - and a coffee) and also life in general (said DC has some struggles, I went down some very dark holes about dying and her being unequipped to navigate the world without me etc, other DC has a lot on at a key life stage etc)

I dropped some balls at work (at least I thought I had, apologised and fawned and then realised I hadn’t and should have stuck up for myself more 😬🙄) which sent me into a tailspin, it’s a newish job that I love and want to carry on doing, in my head I’d been sacked whilst terminally ill etc etc etc

They told me to lay off the oestrogel to avoid ‘feeding’ this bastard thing (still doesn’t have a name, maybe This Bastard Thing will do) so I’ve been plunged back into peri symptom hell to boot (see work meltdown above 🫣😬)

In short, I have had myself dead and buried (and also been given a new lease of life by eventual good news) about 86,000 times in the past couple of weeks.

It’s fucking exhausting. I think eventually the adrenaline ran down, and I have annoyed myself so much with scenario planning that I have finally internalised the ‘one step at a time’. .

DH has been brilliant, Service Love mode ongoing and he’s being solicitous and emotionally honest in a way that he isn’t habitually. He’s hiding the amount he has on at work and is keeping the wheels on a few familial carts I would usually be much more engaged with but just haven’t had the bandwidth.

I’ve been hiding a bit but a (very) few people know now, which has also been weird - every person I’ve told, it’s like it necessitates a round of ‘of-course-this-is-a-huge-worry-but we-must-take-one-step-at-a-time/face it/work it-out-come-what may’ and although I am hugely grateful for the concern (I know I sound like I’m not) and appreciative that there’s not much for it but platitudes when this happens and the situ is unclear, I’ve found the iteration of the same lines irritating, and like we should get it out the way so we can have an honest conversation. I’m conscious I sound like an ungrateful wretch.

I had the MRI. It was horrible. I’m very hardy usually but I cannot bear feeling trapped. I can’t even go in a sleeping bag. I was also raised to cope with things generally and not make a fuss (an approach I often joyously and wilfully ignore, but not in an NHS setting 😆) and I emerged with a banging headache, clenched jaw and had to get the hell out of there. . Couple of big gulpy breaths in the fresh air later I reminded myself of work I did once with some clinicians in Africa who were trying to ameliorate the suffering of people with terminal illnesses who had no access to diagnostics or treatment or even basic painkillers and got A Fucking Grip.

Thanks to some sage advice on here, I chased my GP to get some idea of when and how I should expect biopsy and MRI results (why?! Why is this even necessary?!?!!!) and have been told I should get biopsy ‘in about three weeks’ (so this week) and MRI imminently, they will call or write - couldn’t say which, or when 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️😬😬😬🙄🙄🙄🙄😳😳😳

DH has recently got health insurance via work so I have now also had a private US and another MRI to see what they say. I feel both relieved and extremely guilty about having access to that. I am a pretty strong advocate for myself and to be honest the NHS communication side has been woeful to say the least. I have an appointment to get those results tomorrow.

I remain hopeful that the grim fibroid option is most likely (🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 but 👍👍👍👍👍)

Any which way I look at it, it’s all going to have to come out, isn’t it - womb, ovary and tube on at least one side, then why not get the other ovary/tube out too. . I doubt they can get it out keyhole so I’m bracing for major surgery, come what may. . .

Thank you all again for your kindness and thoughts and for checking in ❤️❤️ The advice and love has helped keep me sane. I’ve re-read all the posts many times already ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

OP, ask for a second opinion from Mr Thomas Ind, he is based at the Royal Marsden (NHS) and the London Clinic (private), so if you can't get an NHS referral, use your DH's health insurance. He removed a big ovarian mass from my daughter via keyhole, and she had minimal downtime and is a yoga teacher. Apparently he is THE pioneer of this technique.

Aimtodobetter · 17/12/2025 09:36

Wishing you best of luck! For what it's worth I had a fibroid the size of a grapefruit, had it removed surgically, recovered quickly and then have two pregnancies afterwards with no problem so don't worry too much!

letshavetea · 17/12/2025 09:54

I’m thinking of you. Wishing you all the best for your results.

chunkyBoo · 17/12/2025 10:06

Just wanted to send love, I’ve had two ovarian cysts, I was lucky and they both are simple cysts, the first was removed and it was enormous, 22cm x15cm if I recall correctly. I have just been diagnosed with the second but they’re just going to leave it unless it causes me issues.
I really hope yours is easily dealt with - good luck

Trethew · 17/12/2025 10:09

Another poster wishing you well in every possible way, and sending all good thoughts to you and your DH

MyAmusedPearlSquid · 17/12/2025 10:32

Wishing you all the best op you are a strong person and you got this take care

EstherGreenwood63 · 17/12/2025 11:19

You sound more than capable of kicking 'This Bastard Thing's' ass. Wishing you well and hoping for a benign bastard for you. 💐

Calliopespa · 17/12/2025 11:36

Sending strength op.💪

meercat23 · 17/12/2025 12:15

Wishing you all the best. The waiting to find out is very hard. I hope they get back to you very soon so you can get on with beating the bastard thing.

Letsgoforaskip · 17/12/2025 12:48

You sound awesome OP. The wait must be excruciating. I would also hate the feeling of being trapped in the MRI.
It is hard to avoid trying to comfort with platitudes so I will just send you love and strength.

DaniO2 · 17/12/2025 12:48

Sending you all the positive thoughts I can xx

Chocolatebunny61 · 17/12/2025 13:17

Good luck for your results OP. You’ve waited a while so far to find out what is going on so I hope you get the answers you are hoping for and that it’s good news.