Cancer Support Thread 96: It’s nearly Christmas - get the sprouts on.

[LemonDrizzle10]

New thread - old one nearly full!

There's a very real danger that any infection will take hold while you're having chemotherapy, and you'll develop sepsis. Hence the double antibiotics 😬

With any infection - tooth, UTI, chest, ear etc please do go either straight to BC nurses or GP - or whomever is able to supply antibiotics - 111 or even A&E, it’s a sepsis risk when you are on chemo - do not risk it.

since being diagnosed I have been told about so many women with BC. I’m going to write a book called “my sister, his mum, their friend and me”

This week I’ve mostly been prepping for surgery next week. I have my post surgery bra and my fake boob, painkillers and front opening shirts & cardis at the ready. I’m
gonna have a little chat with my left breast the night before and thank it for its 33 year service.

All the best for it @Littlecaf. I also had a left boob which malfunctioned. I thanked it the night before in the shower and gave the right one a stern talking to about not copying.

Only a week until the daylight starts getting longer.

@dancingwhilstfacingthemusic yep a good stern talking to for the right one is also on the cards.

Well I didn’t have my second chemo and herceptin yesterday as when I got to the hospital I looked so tough the nurse practioner requested my iron was checked .. sat for two hours in the chemo chair waiting for the result .. my ferritin was only 4 ago instead of chemo I had an iron infusion ..
went home and slept for ten hours , no idea when my delayed chemo will
be now with Christmas in the doorstep , they’ve warned me I might end not get another appointment until after Christmas .. I’m so upset and annoyed

So sorry to hear this @Rockschooldropout all we want to do is get through these treatments and out the other side. Glad to hear you had a decent sleep, really hope the iron infusion makes you feel stronger and no more hold ups.

My sleep is really messed up. I feel like a newborn baby who has day and night confused. Eventually got up at 4pm yesterday, having slept on and off all day (& very little overnight). Managed 5 hours last night. Not as sick today (I hope) so will try to be up and around and push through a bit better.

Anyone else got tubing under the skin with an expandable implant? Mine is really uncomfortable. I’m hoping my surgeon can take that part out once I’ve finished chemo although I have no idea if that is possible.

@dancingwhilstfacingthemusic and @Rockschooldropout and all the others whom are having chemo - it does end and life does go back to normal. I’m 4 weeks past the last chemo and feel much more normal with a normal routine, bloods and sleep pattern. My hair has stopped breaking. I’m so sorry you’re going through it but it should be worth it - I had infection after infection and low iron. Please do speak with your chemo nurse and Macmillan do counselling and a hot line if you just need to vent - I called them a few times and they were lovely.

My cousin had leukemia about 10 years ago - we had a family Christmas catch up yesterday and he was talking about his treatment - he couldn’t remember half of the details and I said “I want to be be like that! I don’t want to remember any of these details!” One day the awful memories will fade and we can get on with our lives.

This too will pass.

afternoon all.

im due pacli no 7 on Tuesday. I’m in the middle of a cold (again - thanks kids!)

also did a stupid thing (sort of) on Friday. I went out for my works Xmas do. I had a glass of wine. I drove home. I had a wonderful time catching up with colleagues and eating the most delicious food (Michelin starred restaurant. Yum.). But I lost track of time and didn’t get home until 130am. Oops. So that hasn’t helped my cold.

my hair is fuzzing back in at an alarming rate! Although I have noted that my lashes and brows are on their way out. Ah well.

Have a meeting with surgeon tomorow - he will do an ultrasound and we’ll discuss surgery some more.

we got news that my cancer is not genetic. So that’s a bonus I suppose.

mine is also in the left boob. Wierd. Apparently the left is “sinister” (the etemology of the word left in many many languages is evil. I think the Latin is sinistre. Right has the meaning of “good” “correct”. )

had a complete total Meltdown on Thursday. I hated everyone and everything. The “why me” came out and I was so over everything. Chemo. Appointments. Surgery. Over it. Didn’t want to do it anymore.

im due chemo on Christmas Eve - plans altered slightly in that instead of a glass of wine at the pub after ringing the bells in church (our local church opens the bell tower all day so you can just go in and ring them!!!) I’ll have a soft drink.

I also have my final chemo dates in the diary. 21 jan. Which isn’t that far away. The end of this phase for me is in sight. It seems so close. But so far if that makes sense.

positives. I went out with dsis yesterday and made a wreath. Isn’t she super? Also nurse catface for good measure.

Lovely wreath @ememem84 😍and beautiful cat.

My final chemo is 24th January, and I have an appointment with my surgeon the next day. Ultrasound tomorrow to see how I'm doing.

I'm so fed up with it all now, and I still have surgery and possibly radiotherapy to go, plus ongoing immunotherapy. I've also had several meltdowns - I'm never going to be the same again and I'm just fed up with everything. I can barely eat anything, and can't imagine eating normally again 😞 I'm so tired, I have to have a sleep every afternoon like some kind of geriatric (never normally sleep during the day). I'm in a relationship which is struggling a bit (too long to go into it here).

/rantover

@BatshitCrazyWoman and @ememem84 keep going my lovies. Keep going. I cuddled my new niece yesterday, had fun with the cousins and nephews and then remembered about 3 hours later that I have cancer. And I’m having my sinstre boob chopped off this week. But for 3 hours life was normal. Cleaned the loo & hoovered today and again forgot that I have a manky tit. I’m hoping for longer stints without being reminded soon.

KBO. It is shit but we will be on the other side and it’s good to get the smoke signals from across the turbulent waters. I should finish chemo end February, not in time to go on the Paris trip I had booked for ds’s 25th (special concert) as it’s only a day or so before the trip even if things go on time. DH will take him and that will be good for them both - as well as DH being able to tell me all about ds loving the treats I have set up.

Random tears a lot here (also processing a major bereavement) but I guess in the big scheme of things it’s part of the healing process - time of year really doesn’t help.

It’s been a better day today and I hope I’m on the up until the next one. I have battery powered fairy lights to bedeck my cold cap for my Christmas Eve treatment.

I hope you get some good news at your scan tomorrow @BatshitCrazyWoman

I’ve got surgery then radiotherapy (which for me means being away from home for 3 weeks in London - I’m in jersey and the radio is the only bit of the treatment that can’t be done here because we don’t have the facilities). I don’t want to ve away from home for 3 weeks!!!!!! But no choice.

im scared about surgery. It’s my first one. I’m scared I’ll wake up during it. I know it’s super unlikely and that I’ve watched too many medical dramas. But still scared. Will relay these fears to the team when I meet with them though.

That's going to be tough, @ememem84, so sorry. I hope your doctors can put your mind at rest about surgery - I've had several ops, and have never woken up until it was all over.

I've always been happy with my body and my figure, the thought of being (sorry to use this word) mutilated makes me feel sick. And then of course I'm covered in itchy rashes, have barely any hair, lost a lot of eyebrows (but have discovered I'm not too bad at drawing them on, who knew?!), I'm pale and too skinny and frankly look like crap. It sounds so vain, but I'm finding it hard to cope with.

Right, I'm going to stop whining now ...

It will be. But. I like London. Will be put up in a nice hotel and will make the best of it. Afaik the radio treatment takes about 15 minutes a day. So I’ll have the majority of the day free. I’m planning on taking myself off to places I haven’t been before and exploring. My insurance pays £ for food and drink (up to a limit) per day if I have to travel for treatment. So my boss suggested I do a tour of the hotels and get a naice afternoon tea in every day 🤣🤣 may do this once. Suggestions welcome.

Positive photos. There’s a 10 day difference between these. Look how much regrowth I’ve had in such a short space of time!

I'm going to get my hair cut off tomorrow before chemo on Thursday. I have long hair down to rhe middle of my back, dyed a lovely purply-red. I am sitting crying in my bed because of my hair. Dh is fucking useless because he can't see that it matters that much. But it does, it really does. And I can't stop crying 😢 about my bloody hair!

@Poledra i did the same and cried through the appointment - my hairdresser has known me for years and was so kind to me. It really has helped get through treatment. I’m cold capping and it’s made it easier to manage losing the hair that has gone and to deal with the reduced washing requirements.

@ememem84 I’m sorry you’re going to be away from home. Operation-wise I had the same concerns and asked the anaesthetist about how they knew I wasn’t awake or under but not anaesthetised. They took me seriously and explained about all the monitoring they do and how they monitor changes - such as heart rate, breathing and other factors - to ensure all stays as it should. I found it helpful to practise some “square breathing”. Honestly, they are so good at keeping things moving that they soon have you settled. I don’t remember a thing from being “under” and it felt like moments until I was awake and coming round. You’ll have a nurse keeping an eye on you immediately after theatre and then they’ll take you through onto a little ward for you to recover for a little while, have a drink and sandwich and to use the loo. This might take a couple of hours. Pain is very well managed as they’ll give you a “block” in the area whilst you have your operation.

@ememem84 love those photos. It’s really growing back in.

@Poledra it really isn't 'just hair", we understand that. Unmumsnetty hugs to you

It does matter. I was exactly the same. Felt silly crying about my lovely hair. But it is important and it does matter. Grieve it.

my DH didn’t get it either.

for me it was the first “change” from being healthy to sick person. And I had to admit it to myself. Because I felt fine.

swnding love. Lots of love. Xx

Hair does matter, it really does. I felt more about losing my hair than loosing my boob! The boob has gone bad, but it wasn’t my hairs fault. I saw a photo of me yesterday and I thought I looked fine but I still look ill, pale and tired. Ffs when does this shit end! Today I am wrapping more presents and watching more Christmas films on Netflix!

My ultrasound was very positive (and God love the radiologist who told me what she saw, and showed me, so I don't have to wait until Friday when I see my oncologist). The lump has broken up, and bits of it she thinks are just fibrous tissue rather than cancer. It's shrinking and breaking up and being DESTROYED, which makes me feel slightly better, as I woke up feeling really unwell this morning.

I've cried about my hair a lot 😞

I had an appointment about a wig last week, and have the hairdresser on Christmas Eve to have my hair cut, and I agree it bothers me almost more than the surgery. Two weeks today before chemo starts for me.

My DH has his oncologist appointment this week, and I'm dreading it. It seems ridiculous that I'm the "well" one out of the two of us, and heaven knows how it will work if we're having chemo at the same time.

That’s bloody brilliant @BatshitCrazyWoman and the news you deserve. It’s a good call for those of us undergoing chemo that hopefully the same is happening in our bodies to any unwanted malingerers after surgery.

I have taken delivery of my prosthetic partial boob today, which I do and don’t want. Having had an implant, I’d hoped not to need it and when wearing a surgical soft bra it’s ok, although I can tell the size difference. I will need it for more structured clothes where I want the balance. I’m reluctant to consider reduction surgery on the other side but that isn’t a “today problem”. The tubing from my inflatable implant is giving me gyp and that (tubing), I’m told, can be removed but hopefully just with a local.

Thinking of you and your DH @frostyfingers I quite enjoyed my wig appointment, I went with a friend, and the woman was lovely, so we had a laugh. (Anyone in travelling distance to central London, I can recommend Raoul Hair). I hope you found something you're happy with.

I hope your tubing (that sounds all kinds of weird!) can be sorted out @dancingwhilstfacingthemusic. I've got a port, which also has some tubing - bit weird. Cannot wait for the port to be removed!

Off to see surgeon in a minute. I’m debating asking whether he will do a rebalancing on the “good” boob at the same time as the “naughty” one is dealt with.

would save me having to go under anaesthesia again.