Feeling scared and fed up with my life

[Sylver75]

I'm 48. Very overweight. Have had back problems for 12 years, two surgeries on lower back. Woke up with a sore neck in November and feared the worst. Went to physio which helped a bit but then the pain got worse. Got MRI results to my phone yesterday, severe stenosis and neural compression on two discs. I was told by a surgeon last year that I have the spine of a 70 year old.

I got prescribed oxycodone and Pregabalin. Trying to only take oxy if I really need it. Feeling very sleepy all the time. Didn't return to work yesterday after the Christmas break but have to go back tomorrow. I'm so afraid the pain will get so much worse when I go back. Also, at 48 I'm wondering if I'm looking at giving up on work entirely which is utterly depressing.

If I can't work, what do I live on? I am trying to lose the weight but it won't happen overnight, especially when exercise is so painful. I'm worried I'll do nerve damage and lose use of my arm the longer this nerve trap goes on as I was left with a permanently numb small toe from a trapped nerve in my leg over a decade ago. Even a short walk makes my arm hurt so much I have to stop.

Feeling hopeless and doomed to a life of lying in bed staring at the ceiling. The fight has gone out of me.

Ah OP, bless your heart.

The good news is weight loss is 80% diet, so don’t worry about exercise just yet.

i personally find the easiest way to lose weight without being hungry and miserable is to cut out UPF as much as possible. So I do still have a slice of toast a day because I love eggs and haven’t found a substitute to having them with toast, but otherwise my typical day would look like this:

egg on toast, either scrambled in butter or poached. If scrambled, served with organic Heinz beans (not ultra processed)

brown rice pasta with nitrate free chorizo and tenderstem broccoli, black pepper and grated cheddar OR tuna jacket with a big salad (mayonnaise either Hunter gather avocado oil Mayo or I have cheese instead) OR tuna pasta stuffed with pepper, onion, cucumber, sweet corn and peas OR dinner leftovers

dinner would be something like a spag bol with 5% mince, loads of veg (onion, pepper, courgette, mushroom, grated carrot) and a sauce made out of passata, herbs, stock and balsamic vinegar. I serve with brown rice pasta and salad leaves with balsamic vinegar

or a chilli made the same way, I use bbc good food recipe

or a cottage pie, sauce is made out of stock and gravy granules to thicken. I add carrots, peas, sweet corn and mushroom to mine and serve with loads of veg

roast dinner, make it from scratch including Yorkshires and cheese sauce

curry, again from scratch.

I don’t really snack, if I’m hungry I’ll have a hot chocolate made from milk and then the chocolate part is cocoa powder and sugar, or I’ll have a smoothie or a piece of fruit.

as you can see you can’t starve on that, lots of nutrients. I eat when I’m hungry and stop when I’m full. I’ve been overweight but I have maintained a healthy weight for years following this.