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Original poster

OH heaving over my smell! Postpartum

65 replies

namechangeyrachy · 05/05/2022 06:40

Slightly embarrassing but I feel so crap about it so I'm here to rant and have namechanged.

I'm coming up to 4 weeks post partum now, my bleeding has stopped but has turned into a yucky discharge apologies if TMI!

Anyhoo OH wanted a bit of foreplay last night and we was in the mood and I completely forgot about it. And of course it ended in 2 seconds with him being grossed out by the smell.

He's not stopped going on about, I've stripped the beds wiped everything down put the rubbish in the outdoor bins and he is still saying he can smell it. He said to me don't ever do that again and took all his pillows and went downstairs.

I appreciate its gross, but the heaving and everything else just made me feel so embarrassed.

He wanted to have sex and I told him no I'm waiting until 6 weeks, so I only done it to please him anyway as I couldn't give a toss with how sleep deprived I am at the moment.

OP posts:
LetsGoCrazyPurpleBanana · 05/05/2022 06:41

It's possible you might have an infection x

sorrynotathome · 05/05/2022 06:42

LTB

Beefcurtains79 · 05/05/2022 06:44

He sounds absolutely fuckibg horrible, you poor thing. There’s one giant revolting stench in your house, and it sure ain’t you.

tothemoonandbackbuses · 05/05/2022 06:45

He is being extremely unreasonable. 4 weeks without sex is nothing.
might be worth checking to make sure you don’t have an infection.

LunaAndHerMoonDragons · 05/05/2022 06:46

His behaviour is disgusting. I agree with PP that you might have an infection, you need to see your GP.

itsgettingweird · 05/05/2022 06:47

I agree about checking for an infection.

It wouldn't bother me about a small making someone gag because I'm very reactive to smells.

But at the point he didn't help you clean the bedding and remove the rubbish, run you a bath and check you were ok I'd have been sending him to sleep in the shed forever rather than allowing him to make it an issue about you.

You need to get tough this morning. Tell him straight how he's made you feel.

Original poster
namechangeyrachy · 05/05/2022 06:48

Im going to ring the doctors at 8:30 thanks ladies. I know it's gross but surely their are other ways to go about things without making your wife feel horrible.

OP posts:
Motherofcats007 · 05/05/2022 06:48

He’s horrible! First of all go to the GP as it sounds like it might be an infection. His response is just ridiculous, with no concern for your health and tell you not to do it again after pressuring you to have sex? Wow… how are you not mad at him???

miltonj · 05/05/2022 06:49

He sounds like a right dickhead. Fair enough to mention it. Bit to go on about it and make you feel bad is unforgivable especially at 4 weeks post partum. Honestly who does he think he is.

It does sound like you might want to talk to the dr though, as could be infection. I don't remember a smell after bleeding. Don't be embarrassed though please, this is part of pregnancy, child birth etc... it's not always pretty! X

Everyoneishappier · 05/05/2022 06:50

It is extremely likely you have a post partum infection.

www.whattoexpect.com/first-year/postpartum-health-and-care/postpartum-infection/#signs

Your husband is appalling.

Branleuse · 05/05/2022 06:50

Surely if it was that bad he was genuinely heaving, youd have noticed something.
Do you have any other signs of infection?
I would never have sex again with anyone who reacted that way to me.

Thinkingblonde · 05/05/2022 06:53

First of all for now, think of your own health, get yourself to a doctor, you could have developed an infection.
Then tell him to grow up and shut up. He’s acting like a child. He’s totally inconsiderate of your feelings.

HelloBarkness · 05/05/2022 06:56

I had a bad infection after a pregnancy loss, so bad it made my husband wretch when he smelled me. But the only thing he did after that was insist he take me to the hospital and make sure I was ok.

You need medical attention, and your dh is a disgrace.

Dailywalk · 05/05/2022 06:57

I think you’d be happier without him. He is treating you appallingly.

Original poster
namechangeyrachy · 05/05/2022 06:58

@Branleuse that's how it's made me feel I will be self conscious forever now. No other signs just yellow tinged discharge with a not very nice smell.

OP posts:
TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 05/05/2022 06:58

God that you’re going to ring the GP and get it checked out.

Your husband is a bigger problem in many ways - if you do have an infection, the GP will be calm, compassionate and treat you appropriately for it. Your husband is clearly capable of none of those things and sounds like an immature, selfish wanker. I’d find this hard to move past, tbh. He certainly wouldn’t be in with a chance of anything sexual this side of ever again.

DinoRock · 05/05/2022 06:58

namechangeyrachy · 05/05/2022 06:48

Im going to ring the doctors at 8:30 thanks ladies. I know it's gross but surely their are other ways to go about things without making your wife feel horrible.

You are right. There are. A decent bloke would have been concerned about you and help you stripped the bed or done it for you. He sounds horrible.

PawPatrolPosse · 05/05/2022 06:59

Your husband should be ashamed of himself. He needs to grow the fuck up

Blossomandbee · 05/05/2022 06:59

As others have said, it sounds like an infection so do checked out - for your own sake, not his.
Your OH sounds absolutely awful. Do not be pressured into anything sexual just to please him! 4 weeks pp is nothing, your body is still healing.

Candour · 05/05/2022 07:01

I’m all for honesty but your husband sounds like the sort of man I would avoid at all costs. I would go to my GP and get myself sorted. Start making plans to get my husband out of my life no matter how long they need to be in play. Never let this man near me again. Not because he alerted me to a possible infection I would have accepted this as caring that’s fine but because afterwards by sulking and being demeaning he treated me like a sexual play toy that hadn’t been washed properly afterwards so he discarded it ! He is abusive.

lassof · 05/05/2022 07:01

That's really upsetting. I am upset for you! It sounds like you have an infection. Where is his care for his partner? The mother of his child?
When you feel better, please have a full conversation with him about this. It was a very nasty way to respond to an illness. He needs pulling up, big time, on that.

Thinkingblonde · 05/05/2022 07:02

PS, I had a BV infection once, I could smell it on myself, I felt pretty crap about it but my DH didn’t gag or turn a hair, he looked after our baby whilst I recovered. He also didn’t expect sex at all until I felt ready.

Clymene · 05/05/2022 07:02

I hope you get the infection sorted. Your husband is a cruel and spiteful man. Not sure what you do about him

sarahc336 · 05/05/2022 07:03

Yeah get into the gp firstly. Second, how bloody rude of your partner op, you must feel mortified. Look after yourself you've just given birth xx

runnerblade95 · 05/05/2022 07:07

He sounds like a piece of shit. How dare he initiate foreplay with a woman who was stated clearly that she wants to wait until the 6 week mark to be safe? To then be repulsed by the smell? It’s the same smell you get after having your period. Big deal! Mine lingers for at least a week after my period. It’s annoying but it’s not repulsive and my husband has never been repulsed by it, so this dick you’re with just sounds like a man-child to be quite honest.